The joke is too big
It's a good thing not to have a wedding at home, after eating and drinking, the guests are gone, and the host has to clean up the garbage on the floor, thinking about it, I still think it's good to hold a wedding banquet in a hotel.
The staircase is a red carpet, melon seeds and peanut shells are everywhere, and what is more serious is the burned-out cigarette butts, and the colorful balloons originally pasted on the staircase wall have all been occupied by children who come to drink wine.
On the wedding day, the children can play crazy, wearing beautiful dresses, and patting the balloons in their hands on the newlyweds' wedding beds, playing happily.
It's time to make the bed, the big red quilt is almost falling to the ground, and the woman standing next to her doesn't know if it's a parent, and she doesn't care about the child, just jumping around on the bed with them.
There are many newlyweds who get married and take wedding photos, as if a trend has been formed, and what is even stranger is that they all like to hang wedding photos on the head of the bed, and I don't know where they learned it?
The bride is wearing a white wedding dress, wearing a crown on her head, the shot is very beautiful, the camera is far away, the groom kneels on the ground, offers a bouquet of flowers with both hands, and has a happy face, the bride covers her mouth, and her face is covered with crystal clear tears, which are tears of happiness.
"Look at the photos taken by other people, it's beautiful!" Zhou Fan shook Hong Yu's arm and said.
Hong Yu took Zhou Fan's hand, put it on the side of his mouth and kissed it and said, "No one is as beautiful as you"
The flesh is numb, goosebumps are up, and many people around him are watching, but he doesn't know how to avoid suspicion and treat people as air?
Nanny Liu Fuxia said, "It's okay to put a pillow, the marriage is over, and today is to eat and drink"
Zhou Fan didn't understand her words, and looked up at Hong Yu, hoping that he could explain to himself, what does it mean to be over?
Hong Yu also shook his head, and the two of them looked at Liu Fuxia at the same time, wanting to get an answer from her.
"Yesterday was the day of the wedding, today I have a treat to eat and drink"
How else can you do that? It's so weird, shouldn't it be done in a day?
The two of them put the pillows, and Liu Fuxia said, "It's okay, what do you mean"
The bride's father's hearty laughter came through the doorway, and he was followed by many people, almost all men, and in an instant the room was full.
"Aren't Hong Yu and his wife here!"
It's a group of men who came to find Hong Yu, some are fat and some are thin, some are still pot-bellied, and they wear thick gold chains on their wrists and necks, looking like nouveau riche.
"Hey, buddy, bring your wife here, don't you dare us to see it, or what?"
A fat man with a big palm on Hong Yu's shoulder, a pair of small eyes looked at all the women in the new house.
"Your belly is big again, it's time to give birth! Do you want me to introduce you to an obstetrician and gynaecologist? ”
I didn't expect Hong Yu to joke, he reached out and touched the man's round belly, turned his gaze to the other men behind him and said, "Let's see, it's a son or a woman."
"Daughter!"
"Son, it's very similar to when my wife was pregnant"
"No, I think they're twins, round and pointed, and don't have a waist yet"
"Ha ......"
This group of men was really speechless, the men and women in the new room smiled and leaned back and back, and even the Liu couple, who were relatively thin, grinned.
Hong Yu beckoned to Zhou Fan, and Zhou Fan slowly walked to his side, was pulled in his arms, and smiled at a group of men and said, "My wife"
There was a look of surprise and disbelief, and someone coaxed, "The old cow eats tender grass, and you also go to the mouth?" Can you? Why don't you be introduced to an andrologist? ”
Zhou Fan looked up at Hong Yu, knowing that he didn't like others to say that he was old, even if he was joking, who knew that he laughed, put his arm around Zhou Fan's shoulders, pointed to a group of men and said, "Okay, don't you know if you women are sent to my house tonight"
"Okay! Leave her behind, and we'll change it," said a short, fat man, giggling.
The joke was a little too big, and Zhou Fan felt the hand that was originally holding his arm trembled violently.
Hong Yu is a domineering and possessive man, how would he refute a group of men laughing at them.
"Okay, just change it"
Crazy! Zhou Fan stared at Hong Yu, glared at him fiercely, then shook off his hand violently, pointed directly at Hong Yu's nose and said, "Do you dare?" My uncle beat you all over the ground looking for kidneys, you don't need to change them, I'll give you away for free, plus a bag of clothes"
After the joke was made, Hong Yu secretly felt that it was not good, but he didn't expect Zhou Fan to be so unaffordable, in front of outsiders, he didn't give any face.
"Just kidding, don't take it seriously!"
There must be a limit to joking, and in public, he actually said that if he changes his wife, anyone will be angry.
A bunch of men were gossiping, clamoring to play cards, Hong Yu was also pulled away by them, Zhou Fan was angry enough, grabbed it, pulled a colorful balloon, pinched it hard, 'bang', there was only a balloon left in his hand, and the noisy room was suddenly quiet.
"I'll take you to rest," the nanny Liu Fuxia said to Zhou Fan.
"No need, you haven't eaten yet, I'll go downstairs for a walk"
The banquet was good, but I didn't eat much, the chef put too much MSG, and a lot of people used chopsticks to pick up the dishes together, so I didn't eat much, and I also ate at noon, eating rice balls, sweet and sticky food and I didn't have a chance.
The first time I knew that I was so rich in civil engineering, the decoration of the three-story building was not bad, a large LCD TV in the living room on the second floor occupied almost half of the wall, and several young and beautiful girls sat on the leather sofa, they had to talk and laugh and knock melon seeds, chatting, and it was good to be comfortable and comfortable!
There is also the third floor, which is full of laughter, loud hearty laughter, and the sound of slapping the table, so it's not lively.
Although there is no sound of blowing, I still can't find a quiet and silent place, three floors, more than a dozen rooms, there are people in each room, and they are all strangers!
I was worried that I had nowhere to rest, and the mobile phone in my pocket suddenly rang, so I took out my mobile phone, glanced at the call from my uncle, and went downstairs without thinking about it.
"Uncle, have you eaten?" Zhou Fan carefully bypassed the guests and came to the back of the house.
"Not yet, what about Hong Yu? I couldn't get through to him."
Can't get through? The mobile phone was on him, maybe he was playing cards and was engrossed, but he didn't hear it!
"I was dragged upstairs to play cards"
The outside of the house is covered with tiles, and there are a few unknown flowers and plants in the corners, which are very luxuriant.
"You also take care of him, the act of playing cards is a crime, he plays cards, and now he is also playing, what a mother! Did you get married and buy something? ”
Shopping? What to buy? Zhou Fan was confused and asked, "What to buy?" ”
"Clothes, shoes, jewelry, furniture, appliances and other things"
Zhou Fan said honestly, "No, I bought a seven-piece suit, clothes or something, I have it at home, I don't like to wear jewelry, furniture and appliances are also available at home, I don't need it!" ”
"You fool, how can it be the same? Get married once in your life, you're still different from others, from the inside out, all new"
What's the difference, it's all the same! Isn't it just busy? After thinking about it, I felt that my uncle's words were right, I was really different from others, I was the first marriage, I and Hong Yu were both second marriages, and we had never had a wedding, it was the first time to get married!
"Where are you? No one at home"
Did the uncle go home? Otherwise, how would he know that there was no one at home?
"In Nantong, Jiangbei, Hong Yu's distant relatives got married, we came to attend the wedding, who knows, they got married yesterday, and they held a banquet today."
It's hot, it's so hot, the clothes on my back are wet, and the midday sun is like a big fireball, scorching the earth, and even the plants planted on the edge of the field are wilting!
A black dog came from the front, hot with a drooping tongue, it was estimated that it was hotter, with long and dense hair, a bulging belly, and walked slowly, and when it reached the shade behind, it stopped, lay down on the ground, and closed its eyes comfortably.
"Uncle, I'm dying of heat, a dog is better than me, it can lie on the ground and sleep, but I don't have a place to cool off" Zhou Fan stomped his feet quite angrily and hid in the shade behind the house.
"Big summer, who told you to go out with him? Who are you hot if it's not hot? I've eaten too, wouldn't it be nice to come back."
It would be nice if I could go back, I can't stand the heat, I can wear a vest abroad, but not at home, no one stares at people abroad with strange eyes, and at home, when I see a man and woman with a tattoo, I will be buttoned up with a hat.
"Go find him, come back quickly, come to me, I have something urgent to find him"
Uncle seems to really have something to look for him, but if there is something, he can't go back now, so he goes to the table and asks him to come down again, is it possible?
"Okay, I'll check it out"
Sweating beads without moving, the smell of fried things and the sound of blowers in the air, I looked up at the sun, and thought to myself if I could throw a stone and knock it down.
As soon as I turned around and came to the edge of the color shed in front, I saw the nanny Liu Fuxia coming over with a water cup, and said in front of Zhou Fan, "Mint tea, relieve the heat"
It's really to relieve the heat, and if you can, a bottle of chilled mineral water is the best!
"Thank you!"
Reaching out and taking a sip of water, I felt a cold trace down my throat, and it was a lot more comfortable.
"Aunt Liu, the wedding banquet has also been eaten, why haven't these people left yet? You won't be waiting for dinner! Zhou Fan asked in confusion
The nanny was also hot, glanced at the people in the color shed, frowned and said, "There is dinner, but these people have not had lunch yet, there are many relatives and friends, and there are more than 40 tables of guests."
No wonder Hong Yu and they went to play cards, they still had dinner, there was only one wedding banquet in the city, and one more meal in the countryside, and I don't know how much money these people who came to eat the wedding banquet paid? Is it enough for food?
"Go to my house and sit down!"
It turned out that her family lived here, and this area was full of buildings, some even three-story buildings, as well as brand-new small villas, and a protective net was made of stainless steel guardrails, which was very beautiful.
After walking a short distance with her, I came to the shortest house in this area, which was not yet a building, and it was not as strong as the warehouse of Hong Yu's distant relative's house.
The door is made of wood, there is a low threshold, there is a green herb under the wall, take a closer look at the old house, it is still made of green bricks, that is, this kind of green bricks in the countryside is almost rare!
"Let's go inside!"
Entering the door is a square table, four benches, a few peaches and leaves on it, very fresh.
The outside is not very good, the inside is OK, very clean, there is a ceiling fan on the beam that turns quickly, much cooler than the outside.
Look at the long table against the wall, there is a row of statues on it, some old and some young, there is also a portrait of Guanyin Bodhisattva hanging on the wall, there is a brass incense burner below, and there are pastries and fruits next to it, which seem to be used for worship.
"Aunt Liu, who are these people?" Zhou Fan stepped back and asked in his heart.
"My elders, and my brother, parents-in-law, and son"
Obediently, they are all deceased people, and they will not all die in this house! If it were, it would be scary!
"What about your husband?"
Nanny Liu Fuxia reached out and touched a frame, held it in his hand and said, "I ran away with someone, my son's kidney was necrotic, lying in the hospital, he urgently needed money, he sent 20,000 yuan, and never showed up again, his son was gone, and he didn't show up"
Still human? Animals are not as good as animals, and their sons are sick and lying on the hospital bed, and no one will ignore them.
"My son is very sensible and often says to me, Mom, when I grow up, I will take you to see the sea and take you to eat delicious food"
Hong Yu's sudden appearance, Liu Fuxia stopped talking, put down the portrait in his hand and said, "I'll wash peaches for you to eat."
Isn't it playing cards? Why don't you fight? What are you doing? Looking at him, he thought about what he said to others, about changing his wife, and he got angry when he thought about it!
"Is it hot?" Hong Yu had a cigarette in his ear, and asked Zhou Fan with a smile.
Isn't this nonsense? Can it not be hot? It's almost hot dogs. Nodding his head, he replied.
"Hot, take off your clothes"
Crazy! Take it off and wear underwear, and it's not at home, just wear a vest and shorts, and now it's someone else's house, which is easy to misunderstand.
Seeing that Zhou Fan didn't move, Hong Yu put his hand into her clothes and fumbled to unbutton her underwear, wanting to scold him, but it was much cooler to untie her underwear.
It's cooler, but with an extra pair of hands in the clothes, I start to touch it dishonestly, and it's still hot.
"Hong Yu, hurry up and let go, you will be seen by Aunt Liu" Zhou Fan scolded.
It's impossible to let go, it's all stretched in, how can it be so simple?
"She went to dinner, there were only two of us left, we just finished eating, how about doing sports?"
"you, I'm going to die, don't do it"
"I move, you don't move, just enjoy it"
The more he talked, the more he felt that he was a pervert, and he didn't plan to take it out, and kept it on his back, just like the two hot electric heaters.
"Frequent sexual intercourse is easy to cause infection, the body will be deficient, and it is not good for the kidneys, and it is astringent"
Hong Yu smiled very happily, stretched out a hand, hung Zhou Fan's nose and said, "What do you want?" I mean, I'm going to give you a massage, you lie down and rest for a while."
Isn't that what? Is it because you are thinking too much? Impossible!
"Don't you have to play cards? Don't you need to change your wife? Zhou Fan glared at him and questioned him
La Zhoufan sat down, looked at her eyes seriously and said, "Don't change, just talk, besides, you haven't seen his wife, it's ugly and ugly, it's not even half as good as yours, it's hard for me to have *"
It's good to have one, and you pick the fat and thin, who knows, if people are willing to sleep with you? The goosebumps on his neck are very obvious, his skin is dark and thick, his face is full of acne pits and acne marks, and he is covered in hair, and his temper stinks to death. Why do you want to have a baby with him? What's more, he was still a big fat man of more than 200 pounds back then, and he stopped eating in bed for less than five minutes.
"My uncle called you, but you can't get through, why don't you answer the phone?"
The two of them got on a wooden bed, as well as the top of the bed, which was a mosquito net, and a mat was spread on it, Hong Yu asked Zhou Fan to lie down and massaged her.
"I'm annoyed, it's nothing more than saying that the furniture and appliances need to be changed at home, I know these, and I also said that on the wedding day, pick you up from him, the best man, the bridesmaid or something, how is the arrangement?"
Do you still need a groomsmen and bridesmaids? I didn't expect it, it seems that my uncle has made proper arrangements and thought about it very thoughtfully.
"Change, you have to change, the bed in the bedroom is replaced with a hard one, it's too soft to sleep and it hurts back, and the dresser, take it off, I don't need it, take up space, and ......"