Wang Hai has left, I am still standing in place, at this moment I have mixed feelings in my heart, I finally know why Angel gave me opportunities again and again, she needs me........ At the lowest point of her life, it was I who gave her the feeling of home and the warmth she needed the most, although this warmth seemed to me to be ready to make and not worth mentioning, but it was precious to Angel! She was afraid of losing that warmth.

I tortured myself over and over again, was I wrong? Am I looking at the world too grayly? Or maybe the world is really dark, but there is always a light for me, and I am going to extinguish this light that will illuminate me with my own hands.

........

I don't know when, Lin Xi came to me, she looked at me and asked softly, "Why are you standing here alone in a daze?" ”

"No, just chatted with a friend, he just left."

"Oh." Lin Xi nodded.

"What about Colin?"

"Qingyi sent him back to the hotel."

Lin Xi's answer surprised me a little: "Why didn't you go with him?" ”

"Long time no see, let's talk to you....... Aren't you welcome? ”

"No, you're not welcome." Even so, I still have doubts on my face.

Lin Xi smiled and said, "It's boring if you can't trust each other in love, so I won't mind chatting with you, and besides, there's really nothing between us, right?" ”

"yes."

Lin Xi was silent for a while, and said, "Then let's take a walk." ”

.........

Lin Xi and I walked on the street surrounded by street lamps, and walked for almost a stop before Lin Xi said the first thing he said to me: "During the time I left, a lot of things happened. ”

"Yes, life is so fickle, and life is wonderful because of fickleness and the unknown, isn't it!" I replied with deep feelings.

Lin Xi stopped to look at me, and I stopped two steps in front of her: "Why don't you go?" ”

"Sister Shen Man is getting engaged, with the prince!" Lin Xi looked at me and said.

I nodded, confirming the matter.

"Very good!" After a while, Lin Xi sighed and continued to walk forward lightly, while I followed her footsteps, and the two of them were side by side again.

The two figures flickered and flickered under the street lamp, and we were silent, as if a few words had already made us finish all the words.

"Yixi, everyone around you is happy, what about you? Where is your happiness? ”

I was put where I was, and Lin Xi's question was a kind of torture to me....... Oh, yes! Where is my happiness?

After a long time, I replied, "Happiness does not only refer to love, I can make up for the gap in love with other aspects of happiness, such as career." ”

"I feel sorry for you......" Lin Xi looked at me, his voice a little choked.

I lit a cigarette and didn't answer.

"I'm sorry, it's my former material that gave you psychological pressure....... But you have to believe me, not every woman is like that. ”

"It's nothing to do with you!"

Lin Xi smiled and said, "Why are you so kind, so tolerant, and so easy to let go emotionally........ You'd rather be paranoid than accept love, and you don't want to resent me for the harm I have done you!! ”

"I hate you, but I don't want to understand you......... We're all better off that way. ”

"But I feel guilty about you now, I always think that I caused your current extreme....... Yixi, I really don't want you to have a bad time. ”

Lin Xi's words made me suddenly angry: "What the hell is going on with you? Do I have to use love as the standard if I live well? I'm good if I have love, but I'm not good if I don't have love? Depend on....... It's you, it's you, not me, you know........"

My anger just made Lin Xi smile, and she said with a calm expression: "Doesn't your anger just mean that you are not doing well, if you are really happy, why do you care so much about other people's opinions........ Cold and warm self-knowing, Zhang Yixi! After Lin Xi finished speaking, he looked at me with a gaze that could pierce my body and perceive everything, and I felt that there was nowhere to hide under her pervasive gaze, and I was almost transparent!

I was forced out of internal injuries by Lin Xi, and I threw the cigarette butt in my hand on the ground with hatred: "You don't have to worry about my affairs." ”

My continued anger didn't have any effect on Lin Xi, she still looked at me calmly, and said slowly: "Cowardice, a cowardly child....... But he always tries to tell others that he is very independent and strong........ Maybe we'll smile at you, because we all treat you like a child with low self-esteem and need affirmation, instead of really thinking that you are independent and that you are strong! ”

I suddenly felt that the layer of camouflage I had carefully made, I was torn apart in an instant, I was pierced by someone, pierced through the pain hidden in the deepest part of my heart, countless days and nights, I did crave love, longing for a woman who cooked and chatted with me after work, but after being hurt again and again, I was in pain, and I told myself: I don't need love at all, because I am very independent, I am strong!! It's just that today someone told me that the so-called independence and strength are just my disguise.......

"I'm going home." I said to Lin Xi.

"You're at your own convenience." Lin Xi said and made a gesture of please, but looked at me with the eyes of a child.

........

In fact, after separating from Lin Xi, I didn't go home, I went to the ancient bridge, a place that I almost forgot about.

When autumn came, the Taoist's business withered, there was no one in front of his stall, and several yellowed leaves had fallen on the gossip map, while he himself leaned on the tree and took a nap.

I took a small bench and sat down in front of him, and he noticed my presence, opened his eyes and looked at me, but showed no surprise at my arrival.

I took a cigarette and handed it to him, but the Taoist just looked at it and waved his hand and said, "No." ”

I took out a box of cigarettes from my bag and handed it to him, but this time the cigarettes handed to him were not as good as before, he looked at it and then reached out to take it, and said to me, "Little monk, are you down again?" ”

"It's not about being down, it's just a loss of work."

The Taoist chief smiled deeply and said, "Old Dao has already told you that disaster comes from the heart, and now it has come true!" ”

"Why do you say that misfortune comes from the heart?"

"If you can't let go of the obsession in your heart, you will have more and more troubles, this is not the old way to fool you!"

I recalled the Taoist chief's sentence "Misfortune comes from the heart......... If I am willing to endure the humiliation and continue to stay in Buick, I will one day sit as the general manager of the Nantong store, and even go to the headquarters to serve, which is what Mr. Lin personally promised me........ But because of the obsession in my heart, I rejected Mr. Lin's kindness, as well as Mr. Gao's kindness, in this work, I have indeed never compromised, and have always been by my own temperament.

"What other troubles could I have?" I asked the chief.

The Taoist chief smiled after victory and said, "What, now that you know that you are afraid?" ”

"One thing, I think what you said is quite like that."

The Taoist chief nodded and said, "If you want to avoid these disasters, you must let go of the obsession in your heart, whether it is a career or a marriage, and choose to be obedient....... Little monk, you have to remember: man will never be able to win the sky!! ”