Chang Yu has found since he was a child that the people around him are different.

As for the difference, he can't say.

Until he was sixteen years old, he had a dream.

In his dream, he transforms into a butterfly, collecting pollen in a sea of flowers that have no borders.

He flew and flew, from east to west, and from west to east.

I picked it for a long time, but I found that no matter how hard I tried, I didn't collect enough pollen.

So he thought, if this continues, when will it be a head?

He couldn't find an answer and tried to find someone to ask, but found that he couldn't speak.

What's going on?

Oh, it turns out that he is a butterfly, and of course he can't open his mouth if he is a butterfly.

He was scared.

Why am I a butterfly and when did I become a butterfly?

He didn't know, but he clearly knew that at this moment, he was indeed trying to collect pollen, and he was indeed a butterfly.

So he was full of doubts, why can butterflies think?

He looked around and found that in this sea of flowers, there was only one butterfly in himself.

Why? He exclaimed, "What about my kind? ”

So he woke up and said to himself, "Am I a butterfly?" ”

It's okay not to say it, but when I say it, I startle myself, because my voice is very unfamiliar.

It's a woman's voice.

At first, I didn't believe it, so I tried a few more times, and finally confirmed that the voice I was making was a woman's voice.

He wanted to find his original voice, but he couldn't find it, and as soon as he opened his mouth, it was a female voice.

What to do? , a man speaks, and the voice is actually a woman, what will he see in the future.

No, I had to get my old voice back, and he began to wonder when the last time he spoke a male voice.

Oops, no memory, maybe I was originally a woman.

It was a dream just now, is it a dream now?

As soon as he thought of the dream, he woke up, and when he woke up, he found that he was soaking wet.

It turned out to be a dream within a dream, and he was worried that he was still in a dream, so he patted his face to make sure that he was really awake.

Strange, why do you have such dreams?

But from then on, he knew that he was different from others: that is, he could make a woman's voice, and even as time went on, he found that he gradually developed some of the hobbies of women, such as liking rouge, or knowing what women were thinking.

These changes frightened him at first, but he soon discovered that he was not actually afraid, but afraid to face them.

When you begin to accept yourself, he enjoys this subtle feeling of being a woman more and more.

He knew that a man, no matter what, could not appreciate this subtlety.

Of course, this difference, this feeling, can only be a secret that belongs to him alone.

The longer this feeling lasted, the longer he grew, and he gradually began to like to be alone.

Sometimes, he could stay alone in the forest for hours and not return until after dark.

Many times, he practiced swords in the forest with his senior brothers, but he soon discovered that his swordsmanship had long surpassed others, especially the mental method taught by the master, when the senior brothers had not yet comprehended, he had already been able to penetrate into the same realm as the master, and even reached the depths that even the master could not reach.

Whenever he meditated, he could capture things that he couldn't usually feel, and sometimes, he even felt the breath of the trees, and he was surprised to find that everything in heaven and earth had spirituality, just like he turned into a butterfly in his dream, and had the ability to think.

After he arrived, the longer he meditated each time, the more deeply he fell into it, so in the eyes of the senior brothers, the junior brothers, who had always been lively, began to become silent at some point, and even unwilling to talk to them anymore.

They don't know when this junior brother began to like to talk to himself.

Chang Yu didn't know what kind of person he was in the eyes of his brothers and sisters.

Until one day, while he was meditating, he heard someone talking about him from afar.

One said: "In the past six months, Senior Brother Chang has been a little weird"

The other also said: "It's weird, I don't even take us senior brothers seriously"

"His swordsmanship is indeed better than ours"

"Okay? No matter how good it is, it is also taught by a master, can he surpass the master? ”

"That's right, it's not just that the master likes him and teaches him the mental method alone"

"Mental method?"

"Yes, the mental method taught to him by the master must be different from the mental method passed on to us, otherwise, his sword technique would not have improved so fast."

"Master is eccentric"

"Except for Master's partiality, I always feel that he has gone mad."

"I can also feel it, whenever I see him, I can always feel that there is a general yin qi"

"Yin Qi?"

"Yin Qi that is neither male nor female"

"If you don't say it, I'm not sure yet, but in retrospect, it is"

"I don't know if Master can feel it"

……

When he heard them say "neither men nor women", his heart moved.

Then I felt very uncomfortable, as if the secret had been discovered by someone else, and I couldn't listen to it anymore.

It was the first time he had heard someone talk about him.

Am I really neither a man nor a woman?

He asked himself, and he didn't know who else to ask except himself.

Ask Master?

If the master knew this secret, he would definitely be kicked out of the sect and become a laugh for the other senior brothers.

Although he can not care about other people's opinions, he can't stand the strange looks of others.

It can't go on like this.

So he flew up the tree and swept towards the two brothers......

The sword was drawn, blood flowed out, and two fell.

When he put away his sword, he suddenly felt a hint of pleasure, something he had never experienced before.

It was the first time he had killed someone.

After killing them, he felt a sense of relief that his secret was gone with them.

It's as if your secret has never been discovered, a secret forever.

Of course, he also experienced another sensation.

When the blade of the sword slashed through the skin, there was almost no resistance, as empty as a sword slashing through the sky.

But there is something different in this emptiness, and that is a texture that cannot be expressed in words.

He has been reminiscing about this feeling since then, and even getting stuck in this texture, lingering.

Yes, some things, once they begin, are destined to be an abyss, and some feelings, as long as you have touched them, can never get rid of them, unless life is over, otherwise, it will be like a shadow, trailing, at a critical moment, fully presented.

At this time, Chang Yu suddenly realized that he was another person.

Neither the former self nor the imaginary self.

Because he can now control the fate of others, and is no longer the brat who has always been taken care of.

Even from this point on, he began to have a desire to control the fate of others......