When I first opened my eyes and saw the light, I saw a distorted figure in my unclear vision.

That was also the first time she knew about the existence of "people".

When I wake up, I only listen to the sounds of the people around me, but I don't understand what they are saying. Later, slowly, I don't know how long it took, and I don't know why, I understood.

"You are 'people'." The women who had been watching over her and her kind said to them, "Like me, we are all human beings." ”

She looked down at her own body, which was covered in black and oppressive creatures, felt the pain as they bit her, a little confused, and looked up at the woman and said, "It's different. ”

The woman followed the voice and looked at her, the smile on her face no longer as natural as Fang Cai's.

"It bites us, not you." Pointing to the barely visible shape of the insect in the Gu pool, she looked at the woman very seriously, trying to make a voice that she could control, "We are different. ”

Maybe it was because she said that, or maybe she was the only one of them who spoke, and women treated her a little differently.

For example, teach her to speak, teach her to recognize things, and touch her head and face, but will not do this to other "people" like her who are soaking in the Gu pool.

"It's a bug, it bites."

"Why only bite us and not you?"

"Because I'm old and don't have much to live, they won't bite me."

"What is 'life'?"

"Now that you have opened your eyes and are talking to me, you have life."

"Why do I have more lives than you?"

"Because you have only been in this world for a short time, and I have been here for a long time."

"Why did I come to this world?"

"Because there are people — two people closest to you — who created you."

The woman took great pains to explain to her the so-called human relationship, and then said to her, "Your parents, the two people you are closest to in the world, have sold you here with their own hands. ”

A very strange feeling arose in her heart, and it was a long time before she realized that it was called Grief.

"Because they don't like me?"

"Because they don't have the money, they can't raise you, they can't even live your life any longer. They abandoned you for their own survival, or even a better life. ”

"Shouldn't I be happy?" She looked straight into the woman's eyes and asked, "The one who gave me life also got a new life because of me." ”

The woman smiled quietly for a moment before asking, "Are you really happy?" ”

She lowered her head and looked at the insects that melted into her body little by little, and she was silent for a long time, and finally said, "I'm not happy." ”

The woman said, "But you have no choice, the weak creatures can only be ruled by the strong." ”

She blinked, "How can I become stronger?" ”

The woman smiled and shook her head, a hint of pity flashed in her eyes: "'If you work hard, you will definitely become stronger' - although I want to say this, but your life has been destined since birth, and now you have long lost the qualification to 'become stronger'." ”

She lowered her head again and was silent for a moment before she said sullenly, "Because they gave me life, they can make a choice for me?" ”

The woman touched her head: "No, but they made a choice for you when you couldn't make a choice, and you lost the opportunity to choose in your life." ”

"Then should I hate?" She asked again.

"Do you want to hate?" The woman looked into her clear eyes and asked.

She thought seriously for a long time, and finally said "meaningless" and lay back in the Gu pool.

The upper half of her body was also immersed in the purple-black Gu pool, and the Gu worms that had originally gathered in her legs and feet immediately dispersed and marched towards the rest of her.

She was in pain, numb from the pain, and only her face felt the clearest. Almost every inch of her body had been invaded by Gu worms, even her eyelids, but her eyes.

Her eyes were always wide open, and in the wriggling darkness, they seemed to glow.

Later, she came into contact with Qing Shui by chance, and she saw herself as a "human" on the water for the first time.

But as the woman said, they are the same, they all have the organs they should have, but the purple-black pattern that spreads all over her body is not available to women, she looked at it, and she was scared.

There were also strange Gu marks crawling on his face, but his eyes were always so bright.

After that, more and more people like her who were covered in Gu marks began to speak, and women spent less time alone with her.

That was the first time she had a concept of time, so she asked the woman, "How long have I been here?" ”

The woman seemed stunned for a moment, then replied, "Seven years." ”

She frowned, "How long is seven years?" ”

The woman took a lot of effort to explain to her how long a year is and how long a day is, and after she understood, she said, "Impossible, it will take longer." ”

"How long do you think it should be?" The woman smiled and asked patiently.

She said, "Ten years, decades, hundreds of years, a long, long time." ”

The woman didn't contradict her, and only said in the end, "yes, it's good that you've lived so long." ”

That being said, she knew she couldn't live any longer.

After another period of time, she felt that something was wrong with her body, in addition to the pain of being bitten by Gu worms, there were more strange feelings.

Something seemed to tear her body apart from within, her internal organs squeezed and kneaded, unable to breathe.

She remembered that the woman had told her that once she felt like this, it was time to be taken out of the Gu Pool. She really wanted to leave this place full of bugs, but leaving it also meant that her life would end completely, and she didn't want to.

The people around her told the woman about the special condition of her body one after another, and she was quickly taken away and never returned. She knew they were free, but they were free at the cost of ending their lives.

She wants to live, she wants to live to see the outside world, and she would rather not be free.

So she endured it all the time, didn't tell the woman, and when the woman asked her, she shook her head in denial, silently watching one person after another being taken out of the Gu pool.

I don't know if the woman saw something, and once suddenly asked her, "You want to leave here, but you also want to live?" ”

She was soaking in the Gu pool with her eyes closed, but she was startled, but she still pretended to be calm.

"Would you like to give it a try, even if it's just a small chance?"

She actually answered in her heart, but she didn't dare to say it, only her eyelashes kept fluttering.

The woman smiled with satisfaction: "You can disguise and have your own thoughts, you are indeed more and more like a 'person'." ”

Even if he has never seen a normal person, he has never experienced the joys and sorrows of the world, in this pool where there are only Gu worms, he has given birth to human nature.

The woman said, "That's good." ”

After that, she didn't know what the woman had done to her, but she didn't feel uncomfortable, but remembered that before the strange feeling disappeared, the woman held her in her arms, and the power that slowly flowed from the woman's body into her body made her feel reassured.

I don't know how long later, the woman dragged her out of the Gu pool, removed the Gu worms that were still crawling on her, and put a robe and cloak on her.

It was also the first time she had put on a dress in her "hundreds of years" of life.

The cloak covered her head and half of her face, and the woman took her in her arms and turned and walked away.

She looked at the large Gu pool that was getting farther and farther away from her, and subconsciously leaned into the woman's arms.

I don't know how long the woman took her and where she went, but she only heard a "boom", and she was so frightened that she opened her eyes and looked forward.

She saw two people, the only people she had ever seen except for the woman and her companions in the Gu Pool.

The two men were surprised to see her, presumably the woman holding her, and one of them called the woman "Master" in a voice that was clearly different from her and the woman.

She knew that they were men, or rather teenagers.

"Leaving?" The woman spoke coldly, not at all like when she talked to her, "Leaving behind my biological father and eldest brother, the two of them ran together, what a good son and a good brother." ”

The young man who called her master stopped talking, but the one next to him said, "Your Excellency is going to arrest our two brothers again?" ”

She saw the woman shake her head, and suddenly hugged her in her arms: "If you want me to let you go, you will meet my condition." ”

The young man before took the lead and said, "Master, please speak." ”

"Take her with you, too."

The woman ripped off her hat as she spoke, she could see clearly, she should be frightened by the Gu marks on her face, and the eyes of the two teenagers widened.

After they said a few more words, she didn't pay attention to it, her mind was full of "I'm leaving, she let me go", and when she came back to her senses, she barely heard a sentence from the young man opposite: "I lost a Gu person for no reason, and you are the first to bear the brunt." ”

The other young man was a little anxious on his face: "Master, in the eyes of the Guihai clan now, you are just an ordinary person who has lost his mind, if they lose a Gu person because of your negligence, they will not care about your identity and will definitely kill you." ”

…… Kill?

She knew that if she was killed, she would die.

If a woman lets her go, she will die?

But the woman didn't seem to care, and said casually: "You don't need to worry about the future." As if to strengthen their determination, he added: "There is no basis for empty words, and it is not enough to believe what you say, but now there is a ready-made 'evidence' in front of you, if you don't leave now, when will you wait?" ”

In the end, the two teenagers were persuaded by the woman, and the one who called the woman's master stretched out his hands to her: "I'll come." ”

The woman handed her out.

The moment she was held in her hand by another person, she lost the sense of security she had always had, and suddenly began to flutter, looking at the woman anxiously.

"You're going to let me go and go to the outside world?" She asked, looking at the figure of the woman moving farther and farther away from her.

The woman smiled softly at her: "Of course not unconditionally. Even if you go to the outside world, you won't live easily. ”

"Then you still put it?" She was puzzled, her eyes widened, "I'm out, I'm going to die, and you're going to die." If I don't go out, I'll die, you won't die, why would you let me out?

"My biological parents will exchange my life for theirs, why do you and I are not related to each other, but still exchange your life for mine?

"Why don't you speak, why do you turn around, why don't you look at me?

"You come back, take me back, I'm not leaving, I don't want to live anymore, I want to die, but I don't want you to die too.

"I'm not worth it, I'm not worth your life for me, it's not worth it! It's not worth it! It's not worth it! ”

What a short life she had, not dignified, not great, not vigorous, just stolen thousands of days from the mistakes of the heavens, meaningless, not worth anyone's effort.

Feelings, life, time, energy, whatever is not worth it.

It's just lucky that she kept these thousands of days for the desire to live and live for that woman, and successfully became a real "person" in the woman's mouth.

The leader told her that he would use her life and death to set off a tide of crusade against Biluo Palace and lift the curtain of demon eradication, and she agreed, after all, this was also one of the purposes of the woman to let her go in the first place.

She asked her disciples to spare their lives, after all, life is an unattainable thing for too many people, and to have it but not cherish it is to live up to the good intentions of God.

Not everyone is willing to "work hard" to achieve their goals, and some people are born with the right to make choices, and no matter how strong their will is, they will eventually be powerless to defy the sky.

If this were a world where gods existed—even if there were gods—there wouldn't be so many people who would be pitied by the gods.

Can't change, can't disobey, can't resist, rather than bloody and defeated, it's better to enjoy it and get by.

For her, it can be regarded as satisfying.

Not many people know her true background, but whether they know it or not, there is a gap between her and everyone that can never be crossed, there is no bridge on it, others can't walk, and she won't fly over.

She controls the internal forces in her body that may explode at any time, and she is controlled by them, always floating in the endless void, floating far away, high, no one grabs her, no one approaches.

Until the overwhelming power swept in from all directions, wrapped her whole body tightly, and landed in front of a person.

She said to the man with a blank face: "I'm not a 'human', just a big bug that has been bitten by tens of thousands of small insects, maybe he will die in the next moment, and after death he will change back to his original form, which is very disgusting and scary." ”

He was not surprised, did not hesitate, was not disappointed, was not sad, and quickly said, "I let it go." ”

For some reason, her eyes were sour, and tears fell uncontrollably, just like when she looked at the back of a woman who refused to leave many years ago, she was surprised for the first time because something inexplicable flowed from her eyes.

I felt sad and lonely like death.

It's just that this time she didn't let him give everything for her like that woman, and pulled him in time to stop him who was wandering on the edge of the abyss, it was he lucky, and she was lucky.

She smiled and said to him, "Let's go." After thinking about it, I still felt sorry for him, and said, "If God is willing to give me an afterlife, I will beg him to reincarnate me as a rabbit you want." I will be with you again and never leave. ”