Behind the attic, near the wall, there are some willow trees. At the turn of autumn and winter, the branches of the trees still have long green and slender leaves, but they are no longer as vibrant as spring, and there are many dead leaves left on the brick floor under the trees, which have not had time to be cleaned.

When Eun Hui saw such a scene, he couldn't help but feel emotional, and his heart was shrouded in depression that was difficult to capture.

She lifted one arm slightly, and looked down to see the wrists and hands peeking out of the sleeves of her light gray cotton robe, and her skin was white and delicate. It's a pity that I'm afraid of comparison, if I compare it with the tight skin of a young lady in her teens, I'm afraid the difference is a little obvious.

She muttered: "Over the years, the concubine has experienced ups and downs, and she has been like the broken flowers and willows, and she is also in the middle of the family, but she is just talking about the remnants of her life. Why should the saint care too much about the concubine? ”

Zhu Gaoxu responded simply: "You should be the same age as me." ”

Enhui was stunned for a moment in surprise, and said softly: "How can this be compared?" There is no shortage of young ladies in the palace who are outstanding in appearance and are more than ten years old. ”

"That can't be compared." Zhu Gaoxu said, "Most palace people can be collectively referred to as young and beautiful women; But there is only one favor. Some people want to change their status through me, and some revere the special identity of the emperor. And the past between us cannot be repeated. After all, no one can return to their original mentality and situation. ”

After hearing this, Enhui raised his head and looked at Zhu Gaoxu carefully for a while, "Does the Holy Lord care about these?" ”

Zhu Gaoxu didn't answer immediately, he was silent for a moment before he said: "I used to think that as long as people have money and power one day, they can get anything except birth, old age, sickness and death. But then I realized that this is not the case, if you miss something, you can't be compensated by power and wealth; Everything you can get in exchange is just what you need. ”

He sighed and paused for a moment. His footsteps also stopped, he stood in place, turned to face Enhui, and said seriously: "Power and money are just the needs of my career now. But are these few people around you who really care about you just welcome and awe? Life is short, no matter how many people we have befriended, there are always few who are attentive. ”

When Eun Hui heard this, her heart was like a mess somehow.

Her demeanor also lost her previous calmness, as if she couldn't control it, making some trivial small movements. She wanted to look up at Zhu Gaoxu for a while, and then avoided her face and pretended to look at the scenery; But at this time, what was going on around him, and what was going on, Grace knew nothing.

She didn't know when she began to accept this Zhu Gaoxu of the Yanwang lineage, and she didn't know how she began to believe in him, and she was more or less happy when she saw him; On the contrary, Enhui thinks that Zhu Gaoxu has a group of wives and concubines around her, and she is not important. Unilateral distraction, a little longer is still easy to wake up.

But when she heard Zhu Gaoxu's words just now, she suddenly felt at a loss.

At this moment, Zhu Gaoxu's voice asked again: "I didn't do anything wrong, so why are you suddenly estranged?" ”

Grace couldn't answer, so he said, "I can't forgive myself." ”

She said this, but Zhu Gaoxu obviously didn't understand what it meant last time, and she didn't care too much. This time he seemed to understand, this was not a casual remark, and he was silent for a long time.

Enhui couldn't help but murmur again: "Before that, I had thought a lot and told myself a lot of truths, and finally calmed down. Reciting the Buddha and copying the scriptures every day, I think this is very good, and I forget the past with a pure heart and few desires, and I am relaxed. But when you came, I didn't know what was going on, and I forgot everything I was thinking about before......"

Zhu Gaoxu suddenly interrupted her and said, "So you can't see your heart clearly?" ”

"What?" Eun Hui was stunned.

Zhu Gaoxu didn't explain anymore, just looked at her. Enhui felt that his mind was blank, and he could no longer think about it, only all kinds of direct and chaotic emotions, but they were also very strong and clear. It is no wonder that people in the world care so much about lonely men and widows being alone, even if they don't do anything out of the ordinary, their feelings are completely different; Because there was only one person around to talk to, Enhui felt that she was the only one left in Zhu Gaoxu's eyes, and that feeling was very special.

Enhui didn't want to admit it, but as soon as Zhu Gaoxu's sentence "I can't see clearly" reminded her, she understood everything.

She felt something warm surging through her body, heating up, but she couldn't find an exit. Once that emotion is stirred, it can no longer be quelled, and only by allowing it to continue to rise can it be released at some point.

At this moment, Zhu Gaoxu approached at the right time and gently hugged her body. He did it without any abruptness, as if he were just comforting a poor woman who was out of control.

But his body temperature suddenly made Eun Hui find the direction of emotional release. She felt that her body was weak, and the strength in her body could not be used.

"There's nothing wrong with it, and there's no consequence for it, so why bother with yourself?" Zhu Gaoxu whispered in her ear. His voice was low but reassuring, and the breath he exhaled touched her ears warmly, and the slight touch seemed to spread quickly everywhere, making her a little flustered.

Enhui exhaled a long breath, stretched out his arm, and took the initiative to hug Zhu Gaoxu tightly. Then she put her face close to Zhu Gaoxu's neck socket, inhaled deeply, and sniffed his breath greedily. It was just a hug, but it seemed that he couldn't break free anymore, and Enhui also felt the changes in Zhu Gaoxu's body. He responded, rubbing his face against her neck.

In broad daylight, Enhui felt a little uncomfortable with such an intimate action. She took the initiative and said, "Let's go into the house first." ”

Zhu Gaoxu said: "It's okay, it's windy by the lake." ”

Eun Hui blushed, pulled away from his embrace slightly, and glanced up at him. Zhu Gaoxu always made her feel natural, and she couldn't find a reason to stop. The two hugged separately, but their hands were still held together, as if they were afraid that they would disappear if they left each other.

They had already gone to the back of the attic; The door of the house was open at the front, and to enter the small courtyard you had to take a detour to the front. However, there is a hut at the back of the courtyard, which seems to be a place to store tools and sundries. Enhui was inexplicably anxious, and he didn't even want to walk a little longer, thinking that Zhu Gaoxu was the same, so they walked to the humble hut together.

Sure enough, it was just a place to put things, and I couldn't bear to look at it directly, and there was no place to sit; Eun Hui hadn't come in before.

The window was closed, and Zhu Gaoxu closed the wooden door with his hand, and the light inside dimmed; But his eyes that stared down at Enhui seemed to grow brighter. The sound of the wind was so heard outside the door that she immediately heard the clear breathing of the two of them. The enclosed space of the hut seemed a little stuffy, at least Eun Hui felt a little suffocated.

The wind outside is still blowing, and the cool breeze comes from the side of Yanque Lake.

In the wall that blocks the lake, one of the willow trees in the row seems to be poorly cared for, tilted to the wall, and the willow branches are like hanging green silk, and when the wind blows, the branches rise and fall, "rustling". On the shore of the lake in the distance, the water waves also rose in the wind, and a prodigal son slapped to the shore of the lake, and the higher waves followed......

When Enhui returned to a bedroom below the attic, the hours were gone. She was in a daze for a while, and when she suddenly came back to her senses, she found that the sky had darkened, and the furnishings in the room could not be seen clearly.

It was a day of trance, and grace occasionally even doubted that nothing had happened today. But those very subtle visions come to mind very clearly and intermittently. If it were just a dream, there would never be such a clear reason. What's more, she was still lazily lying here until the evening, and she could immediately find many traces of the remains.

The maid's voice came from outside the door: "Madam, are you going to the dining room for dinner?" ”

Eun Hui responded, "You can take a wooden box and send it here, it doesn't take too much." ”

The maid's voice said, "Yes, madam, wait." ”

Eun Hui sat up from the couch, walked to the dresser, and immediately carefully examined the face of the bronze mirror. There is no light in the room, so I can't see clearly. She first leaned closer to look at her face, then moved away so that she could look at her mind in the mirror. As she grows older, she has plumped up a lot in the past two years, and her temperament seems to be more charming.

It should have been a long time ago that I cared so much about my appearance. Enhui was still a little entangled in her heart, and she felt depressed at times, feeling that her enthusiasm was just sinking without a future; Sometimes he is unwilling to continue to escape, and wants to change the situation at this time.

What Zhu Gaoxu said about freedom, being able to live unfettered outside the palace, and even going to the theater to watch a play, etc., he thinks it's better to live; Eun Hui has long been out of interest、She's not a teenager full of novelty。

What's more, Grace grew up in the house of the scholarly eunuchs, and when he grew up a little, he entered the palace; The court was where she was used to, even if some might think it was a cage from which she couldn't leave. Eun Hui knows that she likes the cage, because she is not used to the prosperity of the world at all, and she does not even know how to get along with people outside.

If she wanted to be the harem again, or even occupy the emperor, she knew that it was impossible. But at least she can settle down in the court, and in a few days she will be able to get close to the person she is looking forward to, and then compete with other beauties for favor, and she will be very comfortable with those days; It's better than waiting here and not knowing when to come back.

Eun Hui sat at the dresser for a long time, looking at the face that was nearly thirty years old, thinking about the past of grievances that were difficult to sort out. She thought about it repeatedly, not knowing whether to give up and accept her fate, but after that, she still mustered up the courage to fight for what she wanted.

Maybe no matter how difficult life is, when it comes to a thousand warehouses, no matter how you choose, there will be different difficulties and pains.