Looking at Lan Ziyi, watching the expression on his face change,

After listening to what Zhang Wang said, Lan Ziyi first looked at Zhang Wang in a daze, and then frowned as if he was going to ask a question, but Lan Ziyi could only open his mouth emptyly, but he couldn't even say a word, and then Lan Ziyi raised his arm, as if trying to support Zhang Wang's shoulder, and as if he was going to grab Zhang Wang's hand, but in the end, Lan Ziyi didn't stretch out his hand, he could only hang his hand, put it on his knee with the other hand, and tightly grasped his pants, and at this time, Lan Ziyi had already bowed down and cried silently.

Qi Rongxun, who was sitting opposite Lan Ziyi, also breathed a sigh of relief, closed his eyes and cried on his back, the two bloody men cried in an instant, and Zhang Wang's words sent out the pain in their hearts that was about to fester, and sprinkled a handful of gold sore medicine on the wound.

Lan Ziyi grabbed his trouser leg and shook his head with a sigh, he cried:

"It's hard! It's hard! It's so hard to forget them! ”

Zhang Wang slammed the table when he heard Lan Ziyi's words, and the wine glass under his palm shattered in response, and the blood collapsed along the tabletop.

At the same time, Lan Ziyi and Qi Rongxun were put down, the two young people were so frightened by the sudden arrival of the veteran that they forgot to cry, Qi Rongxun raised his head and looked at Lan Ziyi, and Lan Ziyi looked at Zhang Wang and didn't know what he had done wrong.

Zhang Wang glared at Lan Ziyi, the anger in his eyes was about to erupt, and Zhang Wang said:

"Forget about them? Why did you forget about them? Why did you forget about them? They died because of your orders, they died because of your mistakes, only you have seen what they were like before they died, only you know what they said and did before they died, and now they can only live in your memory, but you want to forget them? Can you forget? Do you think memories are the clutter you carry with you and throw them away whenever you want? No, memories are a part of you, they are your hands and feet, your limbs, even if your limbs are cut off, you will remember the feeling they once connected to you, as long as you see the wound, you will remember your limbs that once existed, and memories cannot be cut off at all compared to the body, how can you forget? You keep your memories in your heart, and sooner or later that heavy feeling will crawl out of the darkness, and at that time, even if you want to accept your memories again, it will be impossible.

You want to forget because you want to escape this pain, and I can tell you responsibly, you can't forget, you can't escape at all. “

Lan Ziyi listened to the stern lesson in his mouth, the expression on his face slowly changed from the initial shock to pain, Lan Ziyi closed his eyes with difficulty, shook his head and said:

"But remember that they were so painful, that their pain was like a poisonous snake in the woods and went up my ankles, and entangled me so hard that I could not move, and I never wanted the pain of being bitten by the savage in my life, and I never wanted it again."

Zhang Wang raised his right hand and pulled out the broken porcelain pieces embedded in his palm one by one from the flesh, and he didn't even move his brow during the whole process, as if those porcelain pieces were only pierced by the paper on the window, and it didn't hurt at all when they were blown up in the palm of his hand.

Zhang Wang swept the broken porcelain pieces off the table, took a new cup and poured himself wine, he raised his head and drank a glass, and then said slowly:

"Remembering that the dead are not painful at all, they are just part of the environment, and you will not connect them without the feelings you put in the environment. What really hurts you is not the death of people, but the fact that you let people die, what other people have lost is always someone else's business, only what you have lost will make you worry about it for a long time. ”

Seeing that Lan Ziyi didn't react, he continued:

"It's your fault that they died, just as it was my fault that my men died. I let my people lift heavy objects to climb the snowy mountains, I let them accumulate water in their lungs and finally make them two-legged sheep, this is my fault, even after so many years I will still see those soldiers come back to me in nightmares, I can't shirk the mistakes I made, I can't shirk them, I can't shirk them,

If you want to forget those dead soldiers, you want to reject your mistakes, you want to refuse to admit your mistakes, you refuse to admit that the person who made the decision at that time was yourself, once you start to do this, you are abandoning yourself, cutting yourself, cutting the flesh still hurts, what kind of feeling will it feel to cut the soul than to cut the flesh? “

Lan Ziyi listened carefully to Zhang Wang's words word for word, he felt as if a hole had been opened in his heart, and it seemed like a silted river leaking a hole, and all the things that had accumulated in his heart flowed out of the gap, and his heart gradually became relaxed, and his head became bright again.

Lan Ziyi waited for Zhang Wang to finish speaking and asked:

"So as long as I accept my mistakes, I don't have to experience the heart-rending pain?"

Zhang Wang laughed when he heard the words, and he said:

"Wei Hou, Wei Hou, you still want to escape the problem, I told you that you can't escape.

If you admit that you have made mistakes, you can accept the one who made mistakes, but doesn't that leave you who will not make mistakes? Who thinks it's wrong to do it before making the wrong decision? You will never do something that will go wrong. When you admit to yourself that you did wrong, you have thrown away your right self. “

Lan Ziyi asked puzzled when he heard this:

"So, I'm going to lose some of myself anyway?"

Zhang Wang laughed and said:

"Of course, you grow up day after day and discard yourself day after day, when you were a child, you ate your fingers, do you still eat now? It's not about what you throw away, it's about what do you get when you throw it away? If you hold on to your defects, you will never move forward, and if you don't know that you can change your mistakes, you will end up with nothing left. ”

Zhang Wang took a bite of the dish, and was very relieved to see that Lan Ziyi listened attentively, so Zhang Wang continued:

"If you don't admit your mistakes, then you save yourself before the failure, but the next time you encounter the same problem, you still can't solve it; You admit your mistakes, then you will experience the pain caused by your mistakes, you will experience the accusations of others, you have to think of getting rid of the accountability of others, and you have to bear the pressure caused by the souls of those who died unjustly, but as long as you are not defeated after experiencing this, you really intend to accept your mistakes and take your own responsibility, then you will start to think about why you made mistakes, where you went wrong, and how you can not make mistakes in the future, so that you start to learn, as long as you are willing to learn, sooner or later you will learn something. “

At this time, Qi Rongxun asked:

"But Captain, as the commander of an army, a mistake will kill hundreds of people, so how many people will be buried in my hands if we continue to learn like this?"

Zhang Wang smiled and nodded when he heard this, and he said:

"Qi Hou you asked like this, Wei Hou, you are crying now, it all shows that your conscience is there, and only those with a conscience can become famous, or you treat human life like a mustard, and that soldier is willing to follow you? Even if you can win by being ruthless, if you are unpopular, you will be abandoned by your subordinates sooner or later.

But because you can't get over your conscience, you don't think about leading troops to fight, what is the difference between you and those who are confused and don't know what they are doing all day long? Once the success is done, Qi Hou thinks this is a joke?

If you do things, you will make mistakes, and if you do wrong, you will have to change them, and if you change them, you may make other mistakes in the future, but if you don't change, you will always fall into a pit.

The vast majority of people in this world choose not to make mistakes because they can't bear the pressure of making mistakes, and if they want not to make mistakes, they can only not think about it, don't do it, don't try, and those sergeants who die because of you are like this, they want to win and win glory and wealth, but they don't take the risk of failure to plan a complete strategy, so they can only gamble with their lives, and finally die when the general's command is wrong.

You value the lives of the soldiers, and you will find ways not to let this happen again, and I can't guarantee that you will not make any more mistakes in the future, but I can guarantee that you will make fewer and fewer mistakes, and fewer and fewer people will die because of you. “

Lan Ziyi and Qi Rongxun both let out a few long breaths when they heard Zhang Wang say this, and the stuffiness in Lan Ziyi's chest that had been accumulated for a long time was about to be swept away, but there was one more thing Lan Ziyi couldn't let go, so Lan Ziyi asked:

A few days ago, in order to escape for my life, I only cared about myself on the boat, and actually knocked the passing sergeant into the water, every time I think of these things, I am in pain, what should I do?"

Looking at the simple use of gauze to bandage the wound on his hand, he didn't stop his movements when he heard Lan Ziyi ask, but simply said:

"There are always people who have to survive, you have experienced the pain of living, have you found a reason for yourself? If you have a conscience, you will live with those who have gone because of you, this is your responsibility, I have been talking about this, if you just don't understand, you still don't want to stay in the capital, after the battle, hurry back to Yanguan to retire. ”

Zhang Wang's last words reached Lan Ziyi's ears and rang the bronze bell in Lan Ziyi's heart, the aftermath shook his brain, all doubts and guilt were swept away, Lan Ziyi looked down at his hands, and slowly straightened his spine again, he took a deep breath and looked up at Qi Rongxun opposite, and found that Qi Rongxun also looked indifferent,

Lan Ziyi and Qi Rongxun just looked at each other, and for some reason they laughed slowly, and then the laughter became louder and louder, and Zhang Wang also joined in.

After laughing, Lan Ziyi wiped his face and wiped away his tears, he suddenly felt that his stomach was unbearable with hunger, so he picked up the meat on the table and nibbled a few bites, and then Lan Ziyi picked up the wine glass and filled it, and said to Zhang Wang and Qi Rongxun:

"Since Taiwei is my own person, then let's have a drink!"

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Thank you readers for your support to me, thank you for the encouragement of Scarlet Rain Painting City, and thank you for dreaming of you