Chapter 15 I hate myself

Yuan Tiangang is about to start his cultivation path today, this is his first time descending the mountain, and it is also the beginning of his first solo practice. It was an asceticism, a painstaking adventure. In the whole process of cultivation, he had to be like his senior brothers, not allowed to carry a penny, went down the mountain alone and traveled all over the world, and when he was on the way, he could not mention the Taoist temple he practiced, and he could not rely on the strength of others, so he could only rely on himself and reach the end step by step. He felt that the penance he was about to go to was simply looking for death. I don't have a penny with me, and I have to travel the world and walk tens of thousands of miles on foot, this kind of action is simply joking with the lives of my disciples?! Isn't this self-exile? I don't know how many white eyes, how much suffering, how much pain, how much blood and tears I have to suffer along the way, this is not cultivation, this is simply a prisoner's exile to a foreign land.

"Isn't it true that only Buddhist disciples in this world can cultivate themselves? Why do even the disciples of the Daomen have to do penance here? Shouldn't Taoist priests practice their own mind? Isn't it supposed to bathe the ego in the sun? Why do you still need to repair the self-suffering that is destroyed by the body of the Menzi? Is this nothing but self-exile and exile? What does this have to do with Taoist practice? The immeasurable Heavenly Venerable is above, the disciple is so painful and confused! Or maybe it's just that I'm so miserable......" Yuan Tiangang thought depressedly.

Looking at the clean, but patched robe on his body, Yuan Tiangang couldn't help but shake his head. Thinking about the days when I was about to go to beggar to beg for food felt painful and sad.

"I could have avoided such obscurity, I have so much knowledge about the world, and I can use one at will, and I haven't soared into the sky. Is he really so willing to be a nameless ordinary Taoist priest who has been poor all his life? I have thought countless times that with the knowledge I have in my heart, the knowledge that belongs to this era that will happen, then this can predict the knowledge of the world and make myself famous all over the world. But in the end, as long as you want to reveal even a little bit of the truth about the future, your actions will be disturbed by some terrible interference, making it difficult for your behavior to continue, and your behavior of showing the real future will fail. Thinking about those terrible lightning bolts that slashed at you, thinking about your own experiences again and again, is this the so-called heavenly curse to be suffered when you leak the heavenly secrets? Is it true that all of his actions can't change the normal history of this world even a little? Isn't it enough to change even the slightest? Is it true that if there is any action, it will be punished by heaven? Is this my life? ”

Yuan Tiangang walked while thinking about it, and slowly left his home, the home where he had lived for fifteen years. Looking back at the Taoist temple that had gradually become unclear, Yuan Tiangang's eyes slowly moistened, and he wanted to cry in his heart.

"Damn, in this outside world, the wind and sand are really big, and it actually squinted Lao Tzu's eyes, making me feel like I was crying. But where is the road ahead? Where are you going? I still don't know what to do. Thinking of the terrible encounters on the road told by his senior brothers, Yuan Tiangang's heart was full of sorrow. Thinking of the tasks he needed to complete, he was even more full of complaints: "Although the time for my penance this time is only a short year, there are nine tasks that I need to complete in this year." Each task requires that one be completed before the next one can be completed. When doing these tasks, you are not allowed to mention the name of your own sect, you are not allowed to use the ability of your own sect, you can only use your own strength and rely on yourself to complete it. Thinking about his first task, that task turned out to be to live in a place called Yihongyuan for ten days, but that place was a green building! Since he is a Taoist priest, how can he go to the Qinglou? I'm not a flower priest going down the mountain! What does your master want to do by himself? Besides, if you don't have money, how can you go to the Qinglou? By the way, what is the Qinglou for? Why do their senior brothers have a positive face when they mention Qinglou? But didn't the classics I read say that the Taoist priests who went to the Qinglou were all flower Taoists? Isn't it a precept that monks are not allowed to enter the green house? ”

At this time, a blank piece of paper suddenly fell from the sky and fell in front of Yuan Tiangang, Yuan Tiangang saw the words written on the paper, and his face gradually showed a smile of surprise. "Sure enough, it's you! No, I'm coming, I'm coming to see myself! ”

What was written on that piece of paper was a text, an article that I memorized very skillfully when I was still Su Lun, and an article that I can also memorize backwards now: "Fan Fanzi Meng Bo, Runan Zhengqiang people also." Less vigorous and clean, served by the state, and filial piety. When there was a famine in Jizhou, thieves rose up, and they used Pang as the edict of the Qing Dynasty to make the case investigated. Boarding the car and picking up the bridle, he has the ambition to clarify the world. When he reached the state border, he knew that he was dirty, and he looked at the wind to remove the seal.

Qianguang Luxun is in charge. When Chen Fan was Guangluxun, he held the official rites and ceremonies, but he did not stop there, he held a grudge, and abandoned the official position. When Guo Linzong heard this, he said: "If Fan Mengbo is a person, how should he be treated with public courtesy?" Now that it has become the name of its go, there is no self-inflicted discussion? "Fan is grateful.

It was reverted to the Taiwei Huang Qiong. Later, the three prefectures of the Zhao Dynasty raised rumors, and there were more than 20 people in the party of assassins and 2,000 stone powerhouses. Shang Shu blamed the impeachment of many indecent people, and it was suspected that there were private reasons. He said: "What the ministers do is deeply harmful to the people, how can they be dirty!" Occasionally, the meeting day is urgent, so the urgency is the first, and those who have not been tried are more realistic. The minister heard that the farmer went to the grass, and the grain would be mao; Loyal ministers eliminate traitors, and the royal road is clear. If the minister's words are right, he will be willing to be killed. "Seeing that the times are difficult, I don't know how to do it, because I resigned.

When Tai Shouzong heard his name, he asked him to sign Gong Cao and appoint him to political affairs. On the job, strict rectification of the evil. Those who violate filial piety and commit acts of benevolence and righteousness are swept away and expelled and do not share the court. Recommend different sections, pull out the ugliness. The nephew Xiping Li Song, the descendant of the Gong family, was abandoned by the folk song, and Tang Heng, who often served Tang Heng, asked for capital in Song, and used it as an official. If you are not someone else, you will not be called. Zi Qian was angry, and he beat the book and Zhu Ling. Zero Yang said: "Fan Fan's clean cut is still rotten with sharp blades." Today it is better to be flogged to death than to be disobeyed. "It's a matter of time. The people below the county do not blame for it, but refer to the use of it as a "fan party". In the second year of Jianning, he punished the party members and ordered them to be arrested urgently. Supervising the post Wu Dao to the county, holding the edict, closing the house, lying on the bed and crying. When he heard it, he said, "It will be for me." That is, self-exalted hell. The county commander Guo Yi was shocked, and he untied the seal ribbon, leading them to death, saying: "The world is big, why is the son here?" He said: "If you die, you will be in trouble, how dare you burden the king with your crimes, and make the old mother wander!" His mother did the same. The white mother said: "Brother Zhongbo is filial piety, enough to provide for him, and he returns to Huangquan from his father, and he has his own place for survival and death." But adults cut the unbearable grace, don't increase your feelings. The mother said: "You have to be as famous as Li and Du today, and you don't hate to die!" If you have a name and re-seek the longevity test, can you have both? "Kneel down and be taught, and then bow down. Gu said to his son: "If I want to make you evil, then I must not do evil; If I make you good, I will not do evil. "When you hear it, you can't help but run. Time Chinese New Year's Eve two. ”

Looking at the words that he knew by heart, and looking at the big black dots dotted under the last three words, Yuan Tiangang knew that the person was coming, the one who was coming by himself, and the one who could live to be thirty-two years old came to find him, because he sent him a token that he knew each other. He seemed to have some strange idea in his heart, and a very strange smile appeared on his face!

Walking and walking, looking at the green farmland that appeared in front of him, Yuan Tiangang hesitated for a moment, then quietly squatted in the corner of the farmland, pretending to start defecating there.

Yuan Tiangang squatted there until the moon branches, and his legs were so numb that he almost couldn't stand up. Yuan Tiangang looked at the farmland in front of him, looked at the moon hanging high above his head, and looked at the wilderness that was still empty all around, and the idea that echoed in his heart seemed to slowly begin to become unconfident. Do you think things are too simple: "Hey! The one he hoped for, he really didn't come according to his own thoughts now, is he a little too taken for granted, how could that person be called by himself so simply, after all, he and himself are at least thirty-two years apart. I'm really funny, I should give up right away. I've been squatting in this black-lit place for so long, why did I start to be a little scared, it shouldn't be so long here, there is no one, I'm so scared, is there some beast coming, I'm so scared. I feel as if there is a ghost shaking, is there something unclean coming. Immeasurable Heavenly Venerable Nan Wu Amitabha Buddha My mother, who will save me......"

Just as he was thinking wildly, suddenly a very angry voice appeared in his ear: "Okay, you bastard Taoist, are you crazy, you actually asked Lao Tzu to send you a piece of paper!" Okay, you damn bastard! You don't know that now it's time for Lao Tzu to sleep, and you actually asked me to do such a dirty thing for you, and you still have no humanity! You wouldn't just pick up a rock and rub it, or just pick up a leaf? In such an era, what kind of elegance do you pretend, you even want Lao Tzu to give you a piece of paper! I'm so angry, I really want to beat you up to relieve my anger. ”

When Yuan Tiangang heard it, he hurriedly shouted loudly: "I'm here, I'm here, come here, I can't squat if you don't come!" I'm almost sitting on. My legs are numb! Hurry up! Come and save me! ”

I saw a teenager walking over, scolding, and throwing a piece of oily paper in his hand towards the top of Yuan Tiangang's head.

"Send a piece of paper, you actually want to threaten suicide, are you crazy, there are so many leaves and stones here, you just pick up a piece! Actually, I really want to see how you killed yourself? Are you going to choke to death by eating or are you going to exhaust yourself from squatting? ”

"I'm a Virgo, I love cleanliness, it's impossible to eat shit, it's so disgusting!"

"You actually know Virgo, according to what I know about you, it seems that you shouldn't know about Virgo in your knowledge now, right? Are you enlightened because of? ”

"I seem to have changed something suddenly, as soon as you approached me, that word suddenly appeared in my head, and I thought it was appropriate, so I said it! Is there a problem? By the way, why is the paper you sent me so oily? ”

"Nonsense, you are in such a hurry, I casually took a piece of wrapping paper from my store, and I went out. And I was eating, so I packed some food to eat on the way. I eat all fried food, so this paper is oily! I'm a little embarrassed, and I don't know if you can clean it? ”

"Oil, I'm not afraid, it's just that the paper is a little too small, I almost got it in my hand just now! In addition, there seems to be a very smelly smell on the paper. ”

"It's good to have it, but what do you dislike? Your smells so big, how can you still smell my paper? You are a bloody squirt, nonsense, I knew you were such a person, I didn't have to rush to send you paper! Are you OK ? ”

Yuan Tiangang slowly stood up, looked at the young man in front of him, and whispered: "You can really know what I think, I am really a person with you, or you are my next life!" Who the hell are you......"

The young man looked at Yuan Tiangang, and a smile slowly appeared on his face: "We are actually one person, I should know what you think, I think I am the next life after your next life!" ”

When Yuan Tiangang heard this, he seemed to be very excited, he slowly walked towards the young man, and said loudly: "What happened to me, and what happened to us?" What is your name? Why did you come to me, what the hell is wrong with us? Will I die next year? Will my life be so ordinary? Can my life shine all the time? Can I fly freely on the blue sea like a petrel? I can't look like a man in a suit, I ......"

The young man looked at Yuan Tiangang, who was walking towards him, and suddenly shouted loudly: "You can't get close to me anymore, we can't get too close!" We are all one, and if we get too close, this plane will be destroyed! Now your own mind has started to mess up, and you've started to say things you shouldn't know? The knowledge contained in those words is in my head. If we get too close, we'll start to influence each other and merge with each other, get away from me! ”

Yuan Tiangang stopped in surprise and asked, "What do you mean?" Why can't I understand at all? What blends and what influences? ”

The boy said: "We are actually one person, we should be in different time and space, and now that we can meet, it means that there is something wrong with the time and space of our world, and if we come into contact with each other, we will either merge into one person, or more of us will appear out of thin air at once." But according to the physics of our time, we are most likely to merge with each other! The moment we come into contact with each other, we disappear and lose the quality of a person. Then, according to Einstein's theory of relativity, the energy generated by the instantaneous reduction of mass between us will trigger a nuclear explosion, and we and our world will be destroyed! In addition, we also have the possibility that I and you may be the fault of the existence of this world. If we meet, we may annihilate each other, triggering the destruction of the entire world and even the entire universe. ”

"What is physics? What is Einstein's theory of relativity? What are you talking about? I don't know at all, I can't understand it! ”

"The world I was born in is a thousand years after the time and space of the world you are in, and our science and technology are much stronger than you are now. Your view of the world is as ignorant as an ape's in our eyes. By the way, let's get to know each other, my name is square, and theoretically I should be the next reincarnation! Your next reincarnation will be named Zhou Shengsheng, and he should still be on the run. Whether he will live or not should be determined by whether he can get our help. He's having a harder time than you have at the moment, because the whole world is looking for him. He was the most important fugitive in that world, and his world had become his cage. ”

Yuan Tiangang listened to what Fang Fang said, and asked very puzzledly: "Why is what you said so complicated and so difficult to understand." I can't understand anything! What the hell is a strange secret! Why am I living so strangely? Why am I reincarnated again and again? Who the hell am I? Who am I? Am I a youkai? Am I still human? ”

"Now you are a little Taoist, a little Taoist who is going down the mountain to practice! A Taoist priest who has a secret about the process of this era in his heart! You're not with youkai, you're still human! Still a normal person! ”

"Why do I have such strange thoughts? Why can't I use this knowledge to change my own experience of reality? Why do even the slightest attempts to improve my life fail at all? What's the secret? Why is that? How do I do that? ”

"This is because any little change you make will bring great harm and change to your world, and will destroy your world!"

"What? How I don't understand! What exactly are you going to say? ”

"Not only do you not understand, but Zhou Shengsheng, who is still on the run in his time, probably doesn't understand either!"

Looking at Yuan Tiangang, who couldn't understand at all, Fang Fang said with a smile: "You can find me through the thoughts in your own head, and I want to tell the fugitive guy through you, about the secret of this world, about the secret of our relationship with this world!" Of course, I would like to tell you first and foremost about you, those experiences of yours that have been blocked and changed by me. In fact, my current identity should have been borne by you! Ha ha! Your past has been rewritten by me, and your future will be a blank slate, drawn by what you do! ”

"What do you mean?"

"To rewrite you is to rewrite myself, and to me and the world I live in! I am you, you are me! They ruined our world, and we'll restore them! Everyone has the right to choose to live, even if this world will only exist for one day, or if it has already been destroyed. It's up to us to save them......"