Chapter 255: Lesson 1 (3)

After Jiao Xi shouted angrily, he strode towards Chen Hong: "Spread out your hands!" ”

Chen Hong was not afraid, and stretched out his right hand, which was already swollen like a steamed bun.

Seeing his hand, Jiao Xi hesitated, he was still afraid that Chen Hong's right hand would really be broken, so he shouted: "Left hand." ”

Chen Hong smiled: "Just hit your right hand, I can stand it." Anyway, my right hand is already swollen, and it won't swell anywhere if I hit it again. If even your left hand is broken by you, it will be a little troublesome to eat and dress. ”

Jiao Xi was so angry that the muscles on his face twitched, and he smiled angrily: "Okay, well, since you don't want your right hand, our family will fulfill you." As he spoke, the ruler was about to fall.

Chen Hong also knew that if the precept ruler fell, his right hand was estimated to be bad. It's a pity that he was born a tough seed, but it was difficult for him to beg for mercy, and he only gritted his teeth and stared at the teaching like a wolf.

Sun Dan naturally refused to see his first lesson become a torture room, if he blindly used violence, he would not be able to show his own means. He coughed and said to the teacher, "Father-in-law Long, wait, here I am in class, and everything is up to me." Why don't you two fathers-in-law go out first, do you think this is good? ”

The teacher surnamed Long was stunned for a moment, and looked at Sun Dan worriedly: "...... here" He was a little afraid that Sun Dan would not be able to control the scene.

Sun Dan nodded at him, signaling him to rest assured.

After the two teachers came out of the study room, Sun Dan pressed his hand to let Chen Hong sit down, and said lightly to the students: "What Chen Hong said just now is very right, it seems that you have reviewed "The Mean" in advance and have some understanding, so I won't explain it in detail." ”

He waited for everyone to calm down, and then said: "Speaking of "The Mean", the core part is actually prudence and independence, that is, how a person should restrain his behavior when he is alone, so that it conforms to the path of the sage. This central meaning is summed up in two words, that is, 'in' and 'and', when joy, anger, sorrow and happiness are not expressed, it is called zhong, and after it is expressed, it is in line with the festival, and it is called harmony. ”

After Chen Hong escaped from the hands of Jiaoxi, he didn't accept Sun Dan's affection, but pursed his lips and muttered: "Who doesn't know, isn't it also a script?" ”

Sun Dan continued: "The so-called harmony is actually the knowledge of life when getting along with others. ”

He paused, put aside the book, and glanced at everyone with a blazing gaze: "Most of you are fourteen years old, and the oldest one is almost sixteen years old, and they are about to graduate from the inner study hall and go to serve in various prisons. In fact, from the day you entered the inner study hall, you should know that the ban sent you into the school to study will be of great use in the future. Because, when you study here, you don't have to participate in the imperial examination like a scholar outside, and you don't need to write Bagu Shiwen. It can be said that when you come to study, you are here to learn how to be a person and do things. Because of this, Neishutang is asking you to carefully study the Confucian classics, so that you can become a gentleman with noble conduct, so that you can share the worries of the monarch and father, so that you can be a useful talent for the country and the Son of Heaven. But is it useful to just study what is in books? Although the words of the sage are subtle and meaningful, they can be used in their own eyes, and everyone's experience is different. There is also a way to deal with people. The starting point is the same, but because of the different methods, the results obtained are also different. ”

"In the future, you will be enriched with talents from various departments, and some of you may even enter the ceremonial supervisor in the future and become internal ministers. As a teacher, I feel it is my duty to teach you how to get along with kings and courtiers, and with colleagues. The name of this discipline is "Human Relations". ”

Sun Dan smiled slightly, picked up a copy of "The Mean", looked at it, and then threw it on the table, and said: "These studies are the experience summed up by the ministers of the past dynasties and the cabinet and auxiliary ministers of the past dynasties. The saints can't teach you that. Everyone can come here to study, it will be of great use in the future, and it is meaningless for me to talk about some clichés, nor can I cultivate the talents that the country needs for His Majesty. Sun Dan's lectures have always been straight to the core, only teaching useful knowledge, not playing false. If you want to listen, stay there. If you don't want to listen, you can leave now. ”

Sun Dan's sudden move made everyone stunned, and the study room was so quiet that only the sound of breathing could be heard.

All the little eunuchs knew that they were going to be of great use in the future, but their understanding of politics and interpersonal relations was still limited to expression. Now, listening to Sun Dan's words, he suddenly realized that he would face an extremely sinister world in the future, and the outside world was not as simple as in the school.

Everyone pricked up their ears in unison.

Chen Hong stood up and wanted to walk out. But after thinking about it, I felt that this class would be of great benefit to my future, so I sat down after thinking about it.

He only listened to what Sun Dan said, and he was reluctant to leave.

Sun Dan's first sentence was: "Because of the subtle influence of the words of the sages in the books, everyone is more willing to talk about human feelings in dealing with people, and taboo to talk about utilitarianism." But people always have a trace of selfishness, and if you ask from your heart, many people can't help but be distressed in secret.

However, human interaction is multi-layered, which can be roughly divided into two basic levels: one is emotionally oriented interpersonal communication, such as family, friendship, and love; The other layer is utilitarian-oriented interpersonal communication, that is, interpersonal communication for a certain utilitarian purpose.

In reality, these two situations are often intertwined.

Sometimes, even if it is a utilitarian interaction, it will make people have a certain evaluation of each other, a certain feeling, and trigger an emotional reaction; Sometimes, even if it is an emotional interaction, it will also bring mutual help and support in terms of mutual interests.

The most basic motivation for interpersonal communication is the hope that you can get the satisfaction of your needs from the person you are interacting with. In addition to spiritual needs, there are also material needs. People have the concept of utilitarian gains and losses, and everyone thinks of utilitarianism to some extent. In the relationship, you can simply talk about human feelings, but you should not think too badly of others because of the utilitarian purpose of the other party, or even cut off contact with the other party.

We should pay attention to both feelings and benefits, maintain relationships with the people around us at different levels, and not only use idealistic and purely emotional orientation to communicate. ”

Sun Dan's remarks can be said to be deviant in ancient times, and everyone heard a sharp shock in their hearts, and their heads were "buzz!" I could barely think.

In fact, this kind of practical human relations is a product of the later industrial age. The emergence of the industrial age has torn away the veil of warmth between people, making everything simple and direct, and making it more in line with the management needs of industrial society. Simple, direct, and even brutal, this is also the basic point of management scholar Dale Carnegie's theory of human relations.

Chen Hong only felt that his mouth was dry for a while, and his eyes were full of colorful spots flying, and he muttered in his mouth: "Devils, devils......" But looking at Lu Fang next to him, his eyes were so bright that he was frightening.

Including the whole class, everyone's eyes lit up, like a pack of wolves that had discovered a new world.

Sun Dan was very satisfied when he saw that everyone was shocked, and continued: "Maybe you are thinking that my theory is pragmatism, and it is suspected of being a soldier's theory. In fact, the cornerstone of this theory is, after all, the set of saints. For example, there are four principles of interpersonal communication in my theory: the principle of initiative, the principle of sincerity, the principle of distance, and the principle of self-reliance. Each and every one is in line with the Avenue of Saints. ”

Lu Fang, who had been looking dumb, suddenly stood up and asked: "We can understand the principle of initiative and the principle of sincerity, the unity of knowledge and action, and the way of heaven, these are all written in the book." Aren't the principles of distance and self-reliance in conflict with the principles of sincerity? ”

Chen Hongzheng was thinking about it, but was interrupted by Lu Fang, a little annoyed, and was about to turn his head and look at Lu Fang angrily. But the doubts of others were also Chen Hong's questions, and he moved his lips, but he didn't make any sound.

Sun Dan smiled at Lu Fang, "No contradiction, no conflict." Take the principle of distance, there are more than 30 people in this class, and everyone should have their own good friends. Many people believe that good friends should be inseparable and stick together all day long. But do you feel that if you stay together all day, do you sometimes feel very uncomfortable, feel that your every move is being seen? In this way, I am afraid that I will do the wrong thing and say the wrong thing. It's only when you're alone in a room that you breathe a sigh of relief. ”

The classroom was in a commotion, and more than 30 people began to discuss.

Lu Fang was stunned for a long time before he said: "Mr. is right, Lu Fang also felt this way before. ”

Chen Hong sneered: "You feel like a fart, just like you are now, do you have any friends?" ”

Lu Fang was not angry, he shook his head like Sun Dan and sat down calmly.

Sun Dan waited for everyone to calm down, and then said: "This is just one thing, and the other is that if you are wrapped up with friends for a long time, it is not conducive to expanding the interpersonal circle. In other words, your social range and way of thinking are fixed. ”

He suddenly made a face: "The social circle is solid, and there is a herd mentality in people's thinking, and what friends think, I will subconsciously agree with their views." In this way, there is a collective unconscious. There is nothing wrong with this way of thinking. But don't forget. ”

He shouted: "You will all be in charge of the brand in the future, and even be the internal minister." Tang Taizong has clouds, and if you listen to it, it will be bright, and if you listen to it, it will be dark. For the prime minister, when he is broad-minded, he can listen to different opinions, he can reconcile yin and yang, he can accept all rivers, and he can support the boat in the prime minister's stomach. Everyone must know, everything must be seen, and everything must be thought, so that only in this way can we be neutralized and perceivable the heavens and the earth! ”

"Great words!" Lu Fang suddenly screamed, and tears welled up in his eyes: "Lu Fang is fourteen years old this year, and after studying for five years, I thought that I understood all the principles between heaven and earth. Listening to Mr. today's words, I realized that Lu Fang was just an ignorant schoolboy before, and he was nothing at all. ”

He walked up to Sun Dan, knelt down respectfully, and kowtowed three times loudly: "Lu Fang to meet the teacher." "It's an official apprenticeship.