It's snowing again.

Dad sent a letter back from his family, and he pacified a gang of thieves in Jiangzhou and incorporated more than 10,000 people.

Of course I'm happy for my father, but looking at the flying snow in front of me, looking west at Chang'an, I just want to go back and see, I don't know why, this time, thinking of the mother and Ruoxiu who are sleeping in the three-foot loess, my heart will be so peaceful.

Zimin stood beside me, reached out and took a piece of snowflake to look at it, then looked at me, and said, "Big brother, do you want to go back?" ”

I didn't answer, but said, "You say, in such a harsh winter, she will feel cold?" ”

This is the first time I mentioned Ruo Xiu in front of Zi Min, and I still can't bear to call Ruo Xiu's name.

Zimin looked into the distance and didn't answer my words.

I still decided to go back and promised to accompany Ruo Xiu to keep the year and not break my promise.

Back in Daxing City, the Tang Guogong Mansion was empty, I sat in the elegant house originally arranged by Zimin, and felt a little deserted, Zhang Wensu Fuqin's piano case was still there, and there was no piano on the case.

The chessboard rested on the other side, and I walked over and sat on one side, looking up at the other side, but there was no one playing against me.

It suddenly occurred to me how nice it would be if Zimin sat opposite.

Zimin knew the purpose of my return to Daxing City this time, and until I set off, he didn't mention a word about coming with me.

She didn't follow, and I noticed that something seemed to be missing.

Ruoxiu and I used to have a thick layer of dust in the bedroom, and no one dared to set foot without my permission.

As usual, not even a single thing was left untouched, I spun around and sat at the table outside the screen, remembering the day I broke the teacup on the floor when I married Ruoxiu.

"Ruoxiu, don't go!" I awoke from my dream, and all I could reach out to touch was the cold rim of the cup.

I touched the teacup and slammed it on the tray.

In the dream, Ruoxiu said "take care of yourself" and left me, and my outstretched hand was too late to hold it.

Why did she just leave?

I got up and walked out of the room, the cold north wind blowing knives of snow into my face, stabbing painfully.

I wasn't a sentimental person in the past—eighteen years was enough to turn one person into another person entirely.

I look back on the past, but I don't even remember the pain of the initial rebellion against this change.

Alas. I sighed, turned and walked out of the room, gently closing the door.

As soon as he turned his head, a sword shadow rushed towards him.

Almost subconsciously, I pulled out the soft sword at my waist, slid two feet away, shook my hand, and hit the man's shoulder with a "snap".

When he stood still and looked, it was Li Shimin. I didn't think he would be here.

The sword in his hand was inserted into the snow, holding the shoulder that was hit by me, but he smiled and said, "I was about to go back to Hedong, why did my eldest brother come back?" ”

I put away my sword and said, "Come back and see." ”

Li Shimin thought about it, looked at me and said, "Why didn't Zimin's sister-in-law come with me?" ”

I said, "It's cold, so it's inconvenient for her to come with her." ”

Li Shimin said: "Big brother, let's go see our mother." ”

He guessed what I was trying to do.

I don't know what Li Shimin's feelings for his mother are, because I deliberately ignored them in the past, and I know the least about this younger brother.

But standing in front of my mother's grave, I obviously saw the resentment on Li Shimin's face.

With a pang in his heart, he almost began to doubt his intentions, the sword of the Tang State Mansion, if he could really succeed, would he kill me?

I do not know.

After Li Shimin left, I repaired the thatched hut that had been overwhelmed by the snow by myself.

On the eve of Chinese New Year's Eve, I carefully copied the few volumes of scriptures left to me by Yan Qing in the house, and both Lord Mother and Ruoxiu believed in Buddhism, and I believed in it.

That night I had a dream in which I felt like I had returned to this life.

On the streets of Xi'an City, there were still people fooling around in the middle of the night, I followed a group of people out of the bar, staggering forward, walking, walking, suddenly there was no one around, I turned an alley, looked forward with confused drunken eyes, a thin and weak girl was walking towards me with her head down.

I walked up to her and held out my hand to stop her, and she looked at me and backed away, and when I looked closely, I saw a familiar face, as if I had seen it somewhere, but I couldn't remember anything.

I just know she's crying.

At first, I didn't know or care why she was crying, but I didn't know why, the more she cried, the more uncomfortable my heart grew.

I asked softly, "Why are you crying?" ”

But she ignored me, but retreated faster and faster, and I suddenly recognized her and shouted, "Zimin! As he spoke, he reached out and grabbed nothing.

My heart ached suddenly, and I woke up in a trance, and the long-lost ominous premonition hit my heart again, but this time the feeling pointed to Zimin.

Kneeling in front of Ruoxiu's grave, the boundless apology was as dense as snow, and I couldn't breathe, and I found that I seemed to be caught in a situation that I couldn't jump out of, and even I felt at a loss.

Daxingshan Temple is the same as in previous years, I went to the temple after midnight, took advantage of the night to come to the temple gate, did not knock on the door, flew into the courtyard.

The only thing I can think of is here, and the only place where I can solve my puzzles is here.

There is no trace of snow in the courtyard in front of the Guanyin Palace, and the smoke in the incense burner is still lingering.

The snow had already stopped, and I waited for the first bell in the temple to ring.

"Dang" sounded, the bell woke up the temple, I stayed for a moment, turned the path, and came to the door of the abbot's room of the former Zen master Yancong.

The sound of footsteps behind him was that Zen Master Zhiyue came.

I folded my hands and gave a salute, and Zhiyue saw that it was me, and laughed and said, "The little boy came early!" He let me in.

The room was much warmer, and I sat down for a while, and Zhiyue asked, "The little boy is here because he is uneasy." ”

I nodded and smiled reluctantly, and said, "Zen Master Dharma Eye, built to be here for peace of mind. ”

Zhiyue smiled: "The little boy is wrong!" I am a friend of the little boy, and I can get drunk with the little boy, but I can't calm the heart of the child. ”

I was stunned and said, "Why did the Zen master say this?" The magic of Buddhism is boundless, and you are a virtuous monk, and you have built a ......"

Zhiyue interrupted me with a smile and said, "Little boy, please take a look." He said and pointed to the flickering candlelight on the table, "Is the candlelight moving?" ”

I nodded, "Not bad." ”

Zhiyue shook his head and said, "No, the candlelight has not moved, and the little boy is heartwarming." Peace of mind is self-peace, little boy, do you understand? ”

Of course I don't understand.

Zhiyue saw that I was puzzled, and laughed again: "The little boy's doubts can only be solved by himself, and others can't help much." ”

I stared at the tea in front of me, lifted it, thought about it and put it down, "I still don't understand." ”

Zhiyue said: "Why is the little boy excited? What is peace of mind? The little boy still needs to understand it himself. ”

(End of chapter)