Friend, do you believe in fate?

Tell me, do you believe it?

It is said that it is predestined before you are born, it is said that you cannot escape even after you die, it is said that it can decide your whole life, it is said that it can determine the joys and sorrows of your whole life.

Do you believe it?

Damn it... I wouldn't believe it.

Though.

In this life, I will be as abominable as the abominable thing prophesied, one by one, unhappy.

As prophesied, I hurt those who "value me" and "value me"; As prophesied, I have pushed this life of mine into a vortex of madness and cruelty; As prophesied, I bring and fulfill the things that everyone is "afraid of".

Fuck, fuck prophecy, fuck fate.

But even though it had proven its existence, even if it had screamed in ecstasy and madness to me, to everyone, even if everyone believed in it, I still did not believe it.

If you don't believe it, you won't believe it in death, even if it is broken bones and ashes, even if it is sunk into hell, I don't believe it.

I don't believe in death.

Because, I have loved and been loved.

I've loved it...

That tender love, that keen love, that fierce love, that crazy love, that love that makes me still unforgettable and unwilling to forget even today, even if I am like this...

Acknowledging fate, acknowledging the existence of that thing?

Let me admit that the love I have experienced, the joy I have tasted, has nothing to do with me or with her, but is determined by something that existed long before we came into existence, by something absurd, unreasonable, and incomprehensible.

Can you take that thing, friend?

I can't, and I can't die.

Even though I have fallen into this dark hell, even though I have come to this place from which there is no return, even so, something warm and soft still lives in the deepest part of my heart.

Do you want me to admit that those things are only part of my destiny?

Do you want me to admit that the love and joy I once had were only the reward of fate? Was it the little reward that the impermanent and grotesque old thing had casually discarded to me with the strange thoughts that had somehow sprung up?

In that case." I "Where?" What is the difference between me and all those stupid, ridiculous, arrogant, and rude vulgar things?

"Where is she?" Where is the difference between her "and all those ugly, shallow, wooden, vulgar fat fans?"

… And where is "he" again?" Where is the difference between him and all those hypocritical, obscene, greedy, treacherous gentry?

Fuck it, let fate die, let that fucking thing die.

I'm not going to admit it, I'm never going to admit that it exists, never, never...