Chapter 90: Unforgettable Lovesickness
In modern society, sentient beings are obsessed with delusions and attachments, and their minds are flowing in pursuit. Because of greed, ignorance, and ignorance, there are joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness, and when the time is lost, people change the situation, and when the people are enlightened, the situation is born from the heart and the situation is born because of the situation, all of which show that the human heart is difficult to regulate. Zen culture, as Liu Manli said, is a good prescription for healing people's hearts.
Some people are "sad and sad", because they are afraid of the shortness of life and worry about the loss in life; Zen culture can realize the true meaning of "life is impermanent, and all laws are empty" from a fallen leaf. The ancients lamented that "the sunset is infinitely good, but it is just near dusk", which is really out of the helplessness of life and insufficient pursuit; The modern Ye Shuai's poem "The old man likes to make an ode to dusk, and the eyes are full of green mountains and sunset lighting" reflects the heroic feelings of a wise man with a full life and an open-minded mind.
The famous sentence of the Tang Dynasty poet Du Fu "When I feel the tears, I hate the birds", which expresses the poet's pathos in the country's destruction and separation. Because of the sadness of the time, the poet feels "splashed tears" when he sees flowers because of his love for the world, and he also feels shocked when he hears birdsong.
In terms of psychological germination mechanism, the beautiful writer Liu Manli was "hopeless because of the lack of hope of entering the team" and was discouraged, and she also felt lonely and sighed when she saw the beautiful scenery and the chatting and laughing of tourists, which was consistent with Du Gong's mentality at that time. In this regard, in modern society, people who are frustrated and confused should take more time to study the "Six Patriarchs Altar Sutra", and understand the true meaning of life from the broad and profound Zen culture, so as to grasp themselves and find the happiness that has been lost in their hearts for a long time......
Co-sponsored by the Chinese Popular Literature Society and the Selected Prose Magazine, the "American Literature World? The first National Tourism Essay Contest successfully completed its agenda and ended successfully on September 27 in the 310 conference hall of the BJ National Convention Center.
On the occasion of parting, Liu Manli came to say goodbye to Liang Shirong.
As soon as they met, Liang Shirong smiled at her and said: "I went to Beijing to participate in the award ceremony this time, and I gained a lot!" ”
Then, he looked at her affectionately and said movingly: "I almost missed this literary ceremony, almost missed the highest honor of accepting contemporary Chinese prose creation at the National Convention Center, and almost passed by the Museum of Modern Chinese Literature, the highest palace of modern Chinese literature, and almost missed the opportunity to meet so many knowledgeable literary masters......
Finally, Liang Shirong humorously: "Hehe, maybe "The First Place" is based on Longshan Guoen Temple, and it is stained with the light of the six ancestors of Zen Buddhism!" ”
"Teacher Liang, when will we visit Longshan Guoen Temple in your hometown and worship the six ancestors, so that the little girl can touch the light of the six ancestors of Zen Buddhism?!" Liu Manli reluctantly held Liang Shirong's hand, unwilling to let go for a long time, proud of a pair of lovers in love......
Looking at the beautiful writer in front of him who is both talented and emotional, Liang Shirong faintly feels that they may have developed a relationship between them that should not be generated......
……
It's only been a little more than a week since I came back from BJ, and every time in the dead of night, the scene of getting along with Liu Manli during my stay in Beijing is like the rolling waves on the sea constantly impacting Liang Shirong's heart......
During the days of separation, he received letters from Liu Manli from afar almost every holiday.
He opened a fief and looked at a fief. And one of them made him feel mixed and moved......
Dear Brother Rong!
Although we are temporarily saying goodbye in BJ City, it has been almost a year since we realized that autumn is coming and going again. Today is "Tanabata", and it is Valentine's Day, lovers are dating, before the moon, I and I, what a fascinating scene! At this time, I was alone in an empty office, in loneliness...... Only boring literature and books, non-speaking paper, pen and ink accompany me to spend this lonely Valentine's Day; I can only pour out my heartfelt feelings to you on letterhead, tormented by separation and loneliness......
Your letter has been received, and I already have 16 photos of you. I cherish all your letters and photos, and let them soothe the loneliness in my heart. How I want to meet you! The flames of love continue to stir up my youthful life......
Brother Rong, how have you ever seen a lover or lover like us? Since we were separated in Beijing, it has been nearly a year, more than 360 days and nights, and we have never seen each other, and we have not even received a gift on Valentine's Day, let alone hugging and kissing each other like other lovers, which is really touching and sad. I really didn't expect that it is already the 21st century, and we can still only write poems on red leaves like the ancients, and the fish pass on the ruler; Like the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl, she is full of water, and her veins are silent......
Brother Rong, in fact, the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl are luckier than us, they can at least play the Milky Way in the annual "Qixi Festival", and travel side by side on the Magpie Bridge......
Writing this, I couldn't help but have hot eyes, so I had to stop writing, close my eyes, and think of Li Shangyin's poem: "Liu Lang has hated Pengshan far away, and it is even more 10,000 miles away from Pengshan." "I can't imagine that the few nights we spent together in Beijing a year ago have now become my endless lovesickness and good memories.
I don't know if you can receive this letter; I hope that this letter, this letter written by my men, will turn into a breeze and bring my thoughts to you.
Brother Rong, do you remember? The night before the end of the awards ceremony, we walked through the streets of BJ under the melting moonlight, and I sang the theme song "Farewell Song" of the old things in the south of the movie city: "Outside the long pavilion, by the ancient road, the grass is green. The evening breeze blows the willow flute, and the sunset is outside the mountain. The end of the sky, the corner of the earth, the acquaintance is half scattered; A cloudy wine is full of joy, don't dream cold tonight. Outside the long pavilion, by the ancient road, the grass is green. Ask you when you will come, and don't linger when you come. "I'm here to see you off in advance.
It was late at night, and the dew was drenching our clothes, but I couldn't bear to leave. When I think that tomorrow we will be separated, when I think that you will go and I don't know when we will see each other, I can't help but snuggle up in your arms and kiss you unwillingly. At that moment, the moon in the night sky also hid in the clouds as if shyly, hiding the bright moonlight......
Brother Rong, I still remember vividly, on that hazy night, you won't regard my willfulness as a debauchery, right...... Whenever in the dead of night, when the moon is full, I will sit alone at the desk, chanting in every way, it is a happy thing to know you, it is a happy thing to write a letter to you, how I hope to bathe in the happy time for as long as possible...... And after I received a few letters from you, you seemed to have disappeared from the earth, and you were never heard from.
Brother Rong, what is the reason that I haven't received a reply from you this year? Are you not loving me anymore? Or do you not dare to challenge the world's ideas? Still trying to maintain your "nominal existence" marriage......
Brother Rong! Maybe you'll find me in tears as you read. Yes, I have finished writing this letter to you in choked up and sobbing; As much as I tried to suppress my tears, my tears could not be contained, dripping between the lines, dripping on the letterhead; These tears are my thoughts and unforgettable lovesickness for you for more than 360 days and nights......
The wind and sand blow the old years, but they can't blow away my thoughts about you. And in my heart, I am still sad and accompanied, sitting at the desk with my head down, looking at the books that have been opened by the breeze, sighing that the years are fleeting, trapped by love, I can only push the window to look at the bright moon, and miss my lover in the distance.
The moon is bright, sad. I remember that there was an ancient poem that wrote: "I send my sorrow and the bright moon, and follow the wind until the night is long." Through this ancient poem, I seem to have traveled through time and space, came to the Tang Dynasty, and watched Li Bai borrow wine to dispel his sorrows, and the scene of "three shadows in the moonlight", so as to feel his loneliness. Through this thin loneliness, I thought of Li Bai's confidant Du Fu. Thinking of Du Fu, a feeling of "feeling the flowers splashing tears, hating other birds and worrying about the people" suddenly arose. Wang Wei misses Du Fu, so he brings his loneliness and longing for Du Fu into "floating clouds travel all day long, and wanderers do not come for a long time". These ancient poems all express the author's own quiet sentimentality.
How to steal the time of the capital to know Jun Sijun? The flowers ripen once they bloom, but I miss them. Located in the corner of the wall, do the shape of "bow your head and think of you". Suddenly, I heard the east wind breaking from the distance when the pipa was playing, and I followed the song and found that on the empty wall, the years were like a bubbling stream, flowing slowly. The stream flows with memories of my slumber when I was a child, and I still remember that when I was young, I didn't know how to pass by, and time was no more, so there was no sorrow, like a happy bird flying freely in the unfettered sky. But with the passage of time, the soul gradually matured, bidding farewell to simplicity and ignorance.
The wind blows up the flowing years that are broken like flowers, and the rain falls on the sad years like water, and the time that will never return flies away like the wind. Now I can't tell if, for me, time is an antidote, or is it a poison that I have taken? I thought, if memories are as strong as steel, should I laugh or cry? If steel corrodes like memory, is this a happy city, or is it a ruin?
I fantasize day and night that in my life, when the spring is bright and the flowers are blooming, you will appear in front of my eyes and tell me about your moving deeds of galloping in the industry and creating new brilliance at a new starting point again and again...... How blessed I will be then!
Alas, no more, the east has begun to shine, and the long night is about to pass, and the birds are already squeaking and singing their morning songs in the Zijing tree outside the window. Brother Rong, when you were in Beijing, didn't you always praise me for my literary talent, quite a "poetry demon" Bai Juyi's style? Let me conclude this letter with a little poem.
In that dark night,
You are the lightning that flies through the night sky......
Yes! How brave, how amazing!
You have lit up my life high,
I am a drizzle of rain that you spawned......
Yes! My brave lightning,
Where are you running now?
Where are the people?
However, I believe in you,
Believe Forever?—
There will be such a sudden miracle in my life:
In that bright spring,
In the flowery garden,
You smile at me,
Tell me silently,
Your deeds of expanding the industry.
How blessed I am!
From then on, we will never be separated again;
Never separate again.
But Brother Rong,
Where are you now?
Where are you?
Can you know,
There is a person waiting for you silently......
She used her beautiful youth,
With the unchanging love hidden deep in the bottom of my heart,
Forever, forever waiting for you .......
Love you Manly
Written on the night of Tanabata
The most beautiful thing is that I have grown up, you are not old, may time stay in this moment, Brother Rong, I love you! Happy Valentine's Day!
Reading this affectionate love letter, although the words are blurred, the words reflect Liu Manli's lingering love world for him. Liang Shirong's heart was broken and messed up......