"How many times have I said it, I'm not your ......?"

"Hey, who's that, don't drag my shirt and let go......"

"Who hugged my thigh......"

"Hey, if you still have a sense of public morality, you can't drag that place, let go of ......"

Happy face is sad, although the name is happy, and the person is quite optimistic, but at this moment, he can't be happy anyway.

Lao Tzu's tofu also dares to eat it, and the sister paper is tolerable, and the aunt is never tolerable!

Some of the ancient Diao people dragged his clothes, some hugged his thighs, waist and abdomen, and even those with bad intentions, rough and calloused hands probed his crotch, which was sour......

A few days ago, as an outdoor hobby, I was happy to arrive in a strange mountainous area with survival equipment.

In the mountains, I pretended to be lost, my mobile phone had no signal, and even the mechanical compass failed.

Finally, in a stormy ghost weather, he stumbled and fell off the cliff. At the last moment when his body was still self-conscious, he thought that he was finished, but he didn't expect to regain consciousness and see a group of simple villagers the moment he woke up.

It's just that this group of malnourished villagers have their hair tied up in a loose bun, and the adults have beards, all dressed in patched gray linen hanfu, and tied around their waists with thick ropes made of straw.

Ancient rednecks?

Happy, a little out of the way.

The couch and furnishings in the eyes are all antique and simple, even the walls are made of mud, and there are occasional black holes and wormholes on the walls.

This sight gave him a gut feeling that he seemed to be wearing it.

A long-bearded old man saw him wake up, came to him, and said with a smile, "Master Li, are you still unwell?" ”

Lizheng? What the heck?

Li Zheng, isn't it the village party secretary, what a mess.

Wait, when did you become the village party secretary, is there any mistake, everyone is not familiar with each other, and it is not from the same village, but we are civilized and you ancient hillbillies can't fight together.

Wait until the long-bearded old man chatters for a long time, let him have a good rest, and then lead the onlookers away.

Happy got up from the bed, looked down at what he was wearing, and was a little confused, he was actually wearing a linen robe similar to Hanfu, with straw tied around his waist at will, and there were several patches on Hanfu.

Happy frightened, hurriedly came to the room, found a tank full of water, looked down at the calm water waves, smiled, yes, the face is tender and young, handsome and handsome, but the head is wrapped around the sackcloth, faintly painful, a little ruined.

No, this is not his own face, this face is at most eighteen years old, and he still has long hair and combs his hair in a bun, dressed like an ancient.

Happy sighed in his heart and sat on the ground, really worn, still soul worn, no, he had to leave.

Crossing is enough to destroy the three views, but crossing can be crossed, and somehow he became the village director.

Such an outrageous thing is very weird, there must be a demon when things are impermanent, and a demon must be a traveler.

No matter what dynasty he is in, there are no computers, no mobile phones, no Internet, no movies, and no glamorous nightlife, which is unbearable.

recalled the moment when he rolled off the cliff, combined with the many crossing routines in the travel novels he had read, he couldn't understand it for a while, and this kind of thing really happened to him.

Happy decided to leave this ghost place, even if there was no Internet in ancient times, there was no happy life, and he couldn't stay in this strange village where birds don't, he wanted to go to the city with a lot of lights, visit brothels, walk birds, fight cocks, and be a rich villain who bullies men and women.

Firm confidence, turned around happily, and without hesitation, opened the "squeak" chaotic wooden door, and stepped out.

He must leave this barren ghost village and go to the city to be his rich man.

Fortunately, there were no guards outside the door. He was cautious all the way, hiding, sneaking out of the village, and came to a small river that had dried up, and before he could breathe a sigh of relief, he found that his body was hugged from behind by a pair of fleshy, dirty hands.

Kick your legs hard, but your body can't move, like dragging a weight of more than 100 catties.

Happy to turn around and gasp.

A round chubby chubby mound came into view.

The fat man's waist was tightly choked with straw a few times at will, protruding a circle of fat, like a swimming ring.

“……”

There were two "vermicelli" hanging under the fat dun's nose, and they were about to flow into his mouth, and he was happy without saying a word.

With a "whoosh", the fat dun sucked the snot that was about to flow into his mouth, and the snot honestly retracted into his nostrils.

In ancient times, the countrymen did not pay attention to hygiene, it was terrible!

Happy almost didn't vomit all the food he had eaten a few days ago.

“…… Dead fatty, you let go! "Ancient people are terrible, or modern civilization is safe.

Fat Dun stared at him with a firm will, still didn't squeak, and didn't mean to let go, his black fleshy hands dragged him deadly.

Happy sneered in his heart, can the little fart child trap a certain family?

"Sao Nian, I see that your bones are wonderful, you are definitely a martial arts wizard in ten thousand, and it is up to you to maintain world peace, I have a martial arts secret book......

Happy to touch his body for a while, unfortunately, he has no long things, fortunately his head is bright, and the words turned: "Wait for me to dictate to you." ”

"At the beginning of people, nature is good, sex is similar, and Xi is far away......"

Happy to use all his saliva to delete and read the part of the "Three Character Classic" involving the Tang Dynasty and later, the fat dun's eyes were still staring at him firmly, and he still didn't mean to let go of his arm while tugging on his arm.

Cast pearls before swine?

"If you don't let go, I'll beat you......" Happy squeezed his eyebrows, letting his facial features try to squeeze out a vicious expression.

"Clan, second uncle, third aunt, father, eldest brother, second brother, third brother, sister-in-law, second sister-in-law, ......" Fat Dun suddenly spoke, his gong-like voice was deafening, like a lion roar in Hedong.

"Li Zhengye wants to escape-"

In the last five words, Fat Dun roared out with all his strength, elongated his tone, with a spittle star, and sprayed his face with joy, and his ears were buzzed with sound.

This fat man's roar is stronger than a tweeter, talent!

Of course, Xing Xing didn't forget his mission to escape, relieved himself, and turned around to run, but the fat body's body of more than 100 pounds dragged him to move, and it was very difficult to move, not to mention running away?

Before the time to make the incense, the joy can no longer escape.

The men, women, and children of the village seemed to have been discussed, and with the cries of the fat dun, they rushed out of the village, and the tide rushed to joy.

It didn't take long for Xing to drown in the sea of people, and the villagers, no, Diao Min, tore up and down, dragged, hugged his legs, and blocked his waist, like killing a pig, and after he let go, he was carried back to the village.

Like a victorious general, the people carried him back to the tattered mud hut again.

"It seems that Li Zhengye's body is no longer in trouble." The long-bearded old man looked at him with a smile on his face.

"It's in the way, it's in the way!" The resentment on his happy face, and the dissatisfaction with this group of Diao people were all written on his face.

The long-bearded old man didn't care, turned around and said to Fat Dun with a majestic face: "Coward, Li Zhengye has come back from the dead, and he has to be imprisoned, don't ask Diao Min in Shanghe Village to knock his head with a hoe again." ”

Fat Dun nodded, and his fat was shaking as he nodded.

happily gritted his teeth and watched the long-bearded old man leave, and 10,000 grass and mud horses galloped past in his heart, greeting all the women of the long-bearded old man's family.

In the broken house, Happy sat cross-legged on the couch, staring at the fat dun standing in the room, and the fat dun with dead eyes was like a petrified meat ball, staring at him motionless.

Fools can see that they are happy to be placed under house arrest.

finally calmed down, happily sighed that he was unlucky, his front foot fell off the cliff, and his back foot became the Lizheng in the ancient village, such an unbelievable thing, only he, an unlucky guy, can encounter.

"Benri is about to pee......"

"Benri is about to......"

used the housekeeping skills of urine and feces, but Fat Dun was like a fart, even peeing and followed him within a foot, and went to the toilet with him.

Fat Dun's feet stepped on the two planks of the thatched hut, and he made a "squeak, squeak" moan, and was thrilled, if these two planks could not support Fat Dun and his weight, the consequences would be terrible......