(a)

The rabbit that Kaohsiung gave me in Kyoto is called the German Big-Eared Rabbit. Pen, fun, and www.biquge.info

I've kept it ever since.

When I first lived with it, it was only 1 month old and stood in the palm of my hand like a fluffy toy.

When I'm working, it likes to crawl on my keyboard and ask me to stop work to play with it.

I fed it plantain leaves. Actually, it doesn't like carrots and cabbage leaves so much, but likes to eat plantains.

Later, I was surprised to find out that it was very fond of eating bamboo leaves. Every time I lift the bamboo leaves in front of it, it raises its forelimbs, stands upright like a human, and raises its head to eat the bamboo leaves. It can maintain such a standing posture for a long time until all the bamboo leaves have been eaten.

When he was full, he climbed down from his keyboard and lay down on my desk, curled up, shook off his hair, and prepared for bed.

Because it was so small, its fur hadn't grown thick enough, so it shivered with cold as it dozed off on my desk.

I thought about it, so I took one of my wool gloves and made a little nest for it on the table. I put the nest next to a lamp and put it in.

The rabbit slept on his back in the nest with his face to the sky, his forelimbs bent over his chest. It began to lick its forelimbs with relish, licking the left side and the right side, concentrating.

The warm lamp baked it like a charcoal fire.

It is in this warmth, and the eyes are getting smaller and smaller, and the narrower and smaller. After a while, it relaxed its forelimbs, closed its eyes, and fell asleep peacefully.

A baby's snoring sound came from its tiny nose.

I watched it fall asleep unsuspectingly next to my keyboard, and a desire to protect it and care for it sprung up.

This rabbit has lived with me for a long time.

In the end, it dies of old age. It finally died in my arms.

When it died, I wept bitterly. Then, I buried it like a good friend.

Before it died, it tore hundreds of newspapers, it chewed more than a dozen of my clothes, and ate all the weeds and bamboo leaves in a 15-kilometer radius nearby.

I've always called it Bunny all the time I've been calling it Bunny all my life. I didn't give it a human name.

Sometimes, when I was working overtime late at night, I would fall asleep next to the keyboard without realizing it. While I was asleep, I dreamed that I had become a bunny.

I curled up beside you in the cold winter as he did when he was a child, and fell asleep contentedly.

I fell asleep like this, like a stone falling into a well, losing any sense of the world.

I kept dreaming that I was a bunny until I woke up to the alarm clock at work.

What reappeared in my field of vision was the never-ending reality of life.

That, no longer yours, real life.

That, I'm going to check in and sign in and attend a meeting soon, in real life.

(b)

When I was 32 weeks pregnant, I gave birth prematurely and gave birth to a baby girl.

Although born prematurely, the baby was healthy, weighing six pounds and eight taels, which fully met and exceeded the weight standard for full-term babies.

The doctor who delivered the baby said it was due to my very strong placenta. The placenta weighs 5 pounds. With such a strong placenta, I absorbed a lot of nutrients and energy from myself, ensuring the healthy growth of the baby.

The child didn't like to cry at all, and when she was born, she let the nurse scrub and wash her, and she cried briefly twice. The nurses all praised the child and said that he would be able to take it well in the future. As it turns out, it is. She can sleep soundly at night as long as she holds her mother's ***, and when she wakes up, it's mostly because we're all asleep, and ** falls out of our mouths. At this time, as long as you pat her sideways, continue to stuff ** into her mouth, and let her hold it firmly, she will suck again, and she will quickly fall asleep.

In the first few days of her birth, she only opened one eye, which made me worry for many days if there would be a problem with that eye. By the fifth day, that eye could finally be opened, as clear as this one. That's when my heart was put back in my stomach.

I was immersed in the subtle worries and endless joys of motherhood.

All my thoughts are on this little pink baby.

It was the fullest life I've had since you left me. I think that with this little angel in this life, it is enough to fulfill my wishes.

Since then, I have had a life, and I depend on each other.

My heart, which had been wandering for a long time, finally had a landing spot.

-- However, Kaohsiung shattered my illusions.

(c)

I came home from the hospital, and after my confinement, Kaohsiung flew all the way back from England to visit me and my newborn baby.

I gently rocked the cradle. Through a thin veil, chubby ANN was sleeping soundly, her little fists clenched tightly.

Kaohsiung looked at ANN in the cradle and said, "It's unimaginable. This little thing is separated from your body. ”

I glanced at him. I said, "That's how you're separated." ”

Kaohsiung said, "It looks pretty heavy, right?" It's hard to be born. Does it hurt? ”

I said, "You've been a daddy for a long time, don't you know?" ”

"It's just a sighting, and I haven't experienced it, so I don't have this kind of knowledge." Kaohsiung said.

I said, "What do you want this knowledge for?" You won't have an experience in the future, you won't need it. ”

Kaohsiung said: "When we are together, do we have to be like this?" ”

I nudged the cradle and didn't speak.

Kaohsiung said: "Do you really not understand what I'm asking? ”

I said, "I don't understand." ”

Kaohsiung said: "When it hurts, I mean, at that moment when you are in pain and cornered, have you ever thought of me for a second? ”

I don't speak.

After a while, Kaohsiung said, "You don't. Not even half a second. You're thinking about him with all your heart. ”

I continued not to speak.

He said, "Doesn't your heart hurt to think of him hopelessly like this?" When your body hurts, doesn't your heart hurt because of it? ”

I don't speak.

"Do I stab you often?" Kaohsiung said.

"Nope." I said, "No." In all fairness, every question you have, is very good. ”

I said, "I didn't think about him." He was there. He's always there. Think or don't want to, it's always there. Instead of saying, I miss him, but rather that he appears. And as soon as he appeared, something very serious, a moment that was unbearable, became less serious, not so unbearable. ”

Kaohsiung said, "He is a god in your heart." ”

I said, "That's what he is." ”

I looked at Kaohsiung and said, "Isn't he?" ”

Kaohsiung also looked at me. "I thought his expectation was that you learn to rely on your own strength, not forever," he said. ”

He looked at me. "Isn't that what he expected?" he said. ”

He said, "Do you have the strength of your own when you are cornered? ”

He said, "Do you recognize?" You yourself actually have exactly the same power as him. You can too, as powerful as he is. ”

He said, "Goddess of the Heart! ”