The night is too short, too short. Every night, every day, every moment with her was so short, so fleeting, so hurried.

He wanted to stay, but he couldn't. He tried hard to block it, but he couldn't stop it. He stretched out his hand to grasp it, and the sweet time was like quicksand, and when he grasped it in his hand, it passed quickly through his fingers with the wind of time; The tighter you grip, the faster it fades.

It rained heavily overnight and for another day. The day went by like this. In the evening, the rain stopped. The bright setting sun hung in the sky, through the dappled clouds, and into the trees. Half of the sky was clear and clear, and half of it was dyed with orange light. Through the woods, which are not very dense, at the end of the road, you can hear the sound of the river in the distance, and faintly see the flow of water.

Shen Ruoliao sat on the wooden steps at the door, quietly watching the sunset outside the sky. Nightshade came out and sat down beside him.

"Finally got up? The sun has set. He looked at her with a gentle smile in his eyes.

"You'll have to make dinner," she said, "and I'm sore." ”

He smiled helplessly, shook his head, and said, "You think I'm not?" ”

"What then? There is no place nearby to buy ready-made. ”

He thought about it. "Do you want to eat wild vegetable porridge? Simple, light, and delicious. ”

She leaned on his shoulder, smiling. "What you do, what I eat."

Shen Ruoxiao stretched out his arms and gently hugged her.

"In the first year of Jianwen, I accompanied the prince to Beijing and met Mr. Jin Zhong. When he returned to Beiping, he lived in this Tianmen Inn, just to facilitate his escape at any time. ”

She grabbed his hand, rubbing her fingertips lightly.

"You want to go?"

Shen Ruoliao didn't answer immediately; Nightshade looked up and saw the deep knot between his brows.

After a long time, he sighed and replied, "The more you get to the end, the more difficult it is to make a decision." ”

Night Shade said: "I understand. ”

Shen Ruoyu said: "There are some details that I thought of last night. We split up on the road, I rode and you walked. After I crossed the river, I went around to the northeast and took the Jinchuan Gate into the capital. When the time comes, you will go down this road, cross the river, and go directly to the Sanshan Gate in the west, which is the closest and farthest from the Yan army at present. And you are a woman's family, walking is more credible, but riding a horse is suspicious. Do everything possible to avoid letting others know that you and I are connected. Jingshi is now under complete martial law; I guess you can't get in, you must tell the guards that you are fleeing from Baoding to find relatives, and your distant cousin who is married lives in Jinghua Inn, named Jing Yuluo. Your name is Shen Jiaoyun. The sergeant defending the city will go to the Jinghua Inn to find Jing Yuluo to check, and when he hears your name, he will definitely understand that there will be no mistakes. ”

"He's your friend?"

"Friends in the capital. Born and raised in Jinling, he knows the capital well, has strong martial arts, a shrewd mind, and a wide range of channels, and he has a very hard relationship with Zhu Gaoxu, and his heart is towards King Yan; There is no second person like him in the entire capital. He will make sure that everything is in order, your dwelling, your livelihood, etc.; With him taking care of you, I can rest assured. ”

"We can know each other's news through him?"

"He'll master these things. He will tell me when you get into the city and settle down. If there is no big deal, there is no need to contact. If you are pregnant, he will help arrange for you to leave Yingtian, and he will definitely tell me. ”

Ye Laixiang said: "Ruoxiao, have you ever thought that if I am really pregnant, the child is likely not yours." ”

Shen Ruoxiao smiled slightly, obviously thinking too much.

"Xiang'er, you and I have fallen to this point, isn't it hypocritical for me to care about that again?"

He held her hand tightly and said softly: "My father has taught me the biggest lesson in my life, the child is born an innocent and independent individual, he walks his own way and controls his own life. If it were my child, I would no longer be like my father, letting my child bear my infamy; If it was Young Master Zhu's, I wouldn't vent my hatred for a father on my child like others did for me, not to mention that I would have been grateful to Young Master Zhu. As long as you want, your child's surname is Shen, and I will never kick him back to the Yao family, let him rely on the wealth of the Yao family, and then grow into another Yao Jiyu. ”

He thought about it, his expression darkened again, and he said hesitantly: "It's just - Xiang'er, this is what I can't rest assured; If I'm not with you by then, you'...... In case ......"

Nightshade had already guessed his mind.

"Are you afraid that I will be like your mother, and I will die when I give birth?"

Shen Ruoyu lowered his head.

Ye Primrose said softly: "Ruo Xiao, Master Yao told me that your mother's body has been too weak since she was a child, and she almost died when she had diarrhea occasionally, and she couldn't slow down for a month." She was born too beautiful, such a beautiful life is close to immortals and far away, and she never stays in the world for a long time. I'm different; Ever since I was a child, I was beaten all day long, plus I ran around and carried my body. Coupled with the three-year civil war, I suffered hardships in Beiping, and in terms of the degree of fruitfulness, I was no worse than a man. Anyway, we have been traveling together for more than half a month, and I am a woman who has climbed Mount Tai on foot. I'm sure your mother won't be able to climb it. ”

Shen Ruoyu gently stroked the hideous scar on her face, faintly distressed.

"Xiang'er, I've always been worried about you as much as I am about Qiu'er."

Nightshade smiled. "I can see it. You have been married to her for three years and have not touched her; I can't wait to make up for those three years these two nights. Women are too strong, and in the hearts of men, they are not worth pity. ”

He smiled apologetically. "I was wrong. I'm not really here to make up for the first three years, just to — I don't have to think too much about you in the future. ”

"You're in the capital, aren't there two Qinglou women with you?"

He laughed, "Don't mess around; Do you know why I asked you to say that your name is Shen Jiaoyun? It's because of Yun Jiaoniang. How can I take the love of others. ”

"Isn't there still the world's greatest beauty? Anyway, I want to see it. Ye Laixiang imagined herself, and unconsciously raised her hand to touch the scar on her face, and there was a little melancholy in her eyes.

Shen Ruoliao finally couldn't hold back any longer, held her face, and kissed her scar deeply, kissing every inch of the scar.

"Xiang'er, I love you." He kissed her affectionately while saying passionately, "I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you......"

Nightshade has never seen him so unrestrained. She was paralyzed there for a moment, just passively feeling.

He took her tightly in his arms and continued to kiss her, as if it was not enough to kiss her forever.

"You love me, Xiang'er, and say you still love me. Don't lie to me anymore, don't lie to yourself anymore, tell me your true heart, tell me that you love me, say that you never stop loving me, say that you love me more and more, say that you will always wait for me, say that you want me to love you forever, say that you want me to come back alive and marry you. ”

Nightshade shuddered and pushed him away in horror.

"Ruo Few! …… Other...... Don't be like this, we're past this age......"

Shen Ruoyu grabbed her arms tightly and didn't let her leave. He said seriously:

"Xiang'er, this has nothing to do with age. There is no other person who can love each other as much as we do, because we have all experienced it, we have both lost, we have both given up, and we have all broken free. There is no one else who can make me feel so desperately and indulgently; It's the same for you. Xiang'er - You liberated me from my cold reason, but that doesn't mean I've lost my mind. I know you love me more than anything; Why do you use reason to imprison yourself? ”

Nightshade stood there, not looking at him, as if talking to herself, and said weakly:

"Ruoxiao, thank you, I'm really touched; I...... I was truly content. I like you, I like you the most among all the men in the world, but that doesn't mean I love you. You know very well what I really want, what I've always been after. We've all given up too much for our pursuits. I was too young, and the feelings at that time were too naïve and simple, and I had already died out of myself. I'm grateful to have you by my side, and I do want to live with you, but I don't want to marry you. ”

She finally turned her head and looked at him, tired and quiet.

"I'm sorry, Ruoliao, I don't deserve to love you, and I don't have the ability to love you."

He was silent for a moment, did not speak, just looked at her quietly, a little gloomy. Nightshade felt the fear deep within herself; She persevered for too long, but the more she persisted, the harder it became; Deep down, the wavering became more and more intense, and it was on the verge of collapse.

Shen Ruoyu broke the silence, stood up, hugged her tightly in his arms again, lowered his head and kissed her deeply, resolute and majestic, completely unquestionable. He whispered:

"Silly girl, you're still lying to yourself. You've been calling my name all night, do you know? ”

For a moment, Nightshade froze in his arms. Then, she went completely limp, and the tears crumbled along with her persistence.

The evening breeze blows from the riverside and through the forest. The crooked crescent moon came up.

Nightshade leaned on his shoulder, quiet and weak, staring blankly at the crescent moon.

"Last night, I was still wondering if I would never hear you call me 'silly girl' again."

Shen Ruoyu smiled. "And 'Woman', do you remember? Which do you prefer? ”

Night Lai Xiang said: "The two together, it's me." Indispensable. ”

"Woman, silly girl," he called softly.

"You're leaving tomorrow, aren't you?" She asked.

Shen Ruoyu said: "Yes; Tomorrow morning, I'll get up and set off. ”

She was tired: "Are you sure, when you enter the capital, there is no place where I can help you?" ”

He shook his head. "It's enough for me to know you're safe."

Nightshade said in despair, "I don't feel it anymore. I was already doing well on my own. Why are you pushing me like this? You'll be gone tomorrow, and I'll go back to the old days, and I'll have to start all over again. Men must not want a woman to be happy, and to see her dominate himself, to see her on top, must drag her down and put her in shackles again......"

He picked her up sideways, took her in his arms, got up and walked back to the inn, went upstairs back to the room, and put her back on the couch.

"Xiang'er, you're too tired. It's all my fault. He sat down on the edge of the bed, took her hand, and said softly, "Don't be cranky. I don't want to control you, I don't want to shackle you, what I admire and admire the most is your independence, and I really want you to be happy. If you don't love me, I will never force you to stay. But you know you love me; You are just afraid that for the sake of love, you will lose the autonomy and dignity that you have paid so much, so you deceive yourself and say that you don't love me. If I allow you to continue to deceive yourself like this, the end result will be that you have only thrown off one shackle and put another on yourself; How can you be happy? Xiang'er, love is not a shackle, if I pay for you, it is because I think it is worth it, it is my own decision, I am completely autonomous, there is no restraint in it. The rest of our lives are destined to be spent together, this is not control, it is not bondage, this is fate, because in the end the life you want, and the life I want, we have all found in each other. ”

Nightshade sighed.

"I know, I know," she said softly, "Ruoxiao, you are right, love is not a shackle; I love you and I never stop loving you. It's just that now, this relationship and tacit understanding are far different from the fantasies of youth three years ago. Now this love is too plain, too realistic, too deep, too crazy; I can't afford a moment of separation, both physically and spiritually. I want to say that I will always love you, I want to say that I will always be waiting for you, I want you to love me forever, and I want you to promise that you will definitely come back to me. But after going through so much, who of you and I believe in promise and eternity? I said I won't wait for you, in the end, because I don't believe anymore, let alone have faith - it's none of your business, what I can't trust is myself. I don't have the slightest confidence in whether I can insist on loving you and waiting for you. ”

Shen Ruoyu said: "Xiang'er, I understand; I've experienced everything you've said, and I know what it's like. I was also most afraid of worrying in my heart, and I didn't have enough courage and faith, so I took a break from Qiu'er; But now, you've given me everything. I know you love me, you are willing to wait for me all your life, I know I love you, and I want to grow old with you. I have a concern, which is too strong and too deep for me to stop. But at the same time, I also had hope and faith. As long as I have you in my heart, I will definitely be able to turn evil into good and work hard, and I will definitely be able to come back to you alive. I'll be back, Xiang'er; You also have to believe, you have to have faith. ”

Nightshade shook her head tiredly. "What would happen to you if Qiu'er reappeared and came back to you?"

Shen Ruoyu paused, not surprised. He thought about it seriously, and it didn't take long.

He opened his mouth, affectionate and calm, inflexible: "Xiang'er, you just have to remember: I love you, I must come back to you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to be the father of your children." I'm going to go with you to see the sea. We wander the rivers and lakes together, the end of the world. ”

She turned her face away from him, tears streaming down her face. She said calmly:

"I'm fine; You don't have to worry. You just shouldn't have made me think about these things when the sun was setting. Every night is more fragile than during the day. Actually, I'm used to it. I'll be fine alone, and I'll be fine soon; Tomorrow morning, as soon as the sun comes out, I will be fine, back to the way I was yesterday, or even better. You don't have to worry. ”

Shen Ruoyu knew that she was crying silently. He draped her in a sheet and said softly:

"Xiang'er, what is needed to be strong is not to suppress, but to release. After crying, you will be stronger. I'll go down and cook porridge, you can relax for a while, and sleep if you want. We all need a good night's rest tonight. ”

He put the tea on the bedside table and left the room gently.