Chapter 19: Loss, Quiet Yearning

This would explain his attitude towards those revolutionaries who were full of the deepest pain for the country and the nation, who cried out and died with no mercy. Pen? Interesting? Pavilion wWw. biquge。 infoAs for the fate of the country, it is indeed too much to say that Chen Wenqiang is like a bystander of many overseas Chinese. But he does lack that passion, whether it is rational, calm objectivity, or subconscious detachment, or both.

Make money, live. No matter what kind of means are used or what kind of impact is caused, I have not escaped from these two most fundamental categories. Fighting sin and killing traitors and hoes is an acknowledgment of the divine existence, an unaccustomedness, a redemption, and a greater expectation of changes in one's body and mind.

It turned out that he did not integrate into this era and this society, and Chen Wenqiang was somewhat aware of his problems. It is the body, the habits of life, and the way of behaving, not the thoughts and thoughts. Although this is inevitable, Chen Wenqiang rarely looks at problems from other people's perspectives, and the separation from people's thoughts at that time makes Chen Wenqiang stand out, but it also makes him unable to fully keep up with the pace of the times.

When Zou Rong was a weak champion, why was he able to write the majestic and loud "Revolutionary Army"? Why did it seem to me that Beichen's somewhat empty revolutionary speech could make so many people's blood boil and follow them willingly? Why do many people who have superior family conditions and can live a good life, but resolutely destroy their families to relieve their difficulties, and even sacrifice at the cost of bloodshed?

"Fa, it's right that you're Chinese, and it's understandable to want your compatriots to live a better life." Neumann was still babbling, "But people's desires will never be satisfied, and they will constantly raise the standards in their hearts, and keep raising their requirements." Once you can't be satisfied, they will be dissatisfied and will be resentful. And the favor before, do you think they will remember? I have experienced this firsthand. ”

Chen Wenqiang's eyes rounded, and he seemed to have sobered up from his thoughts, staring at Neumann for a long time before he smiled slightly and said, "There may be a situation like what you said, but this is not necessarily a bad thing." Well, you don't understand, you don't understand. Being insensitive, not knowing how to fight in suffering, that is the most terrible. So, I would like them to be a little bit ambitious, or expectant. As he spoke, he stood up, drank all the wine in his glass, and waved his hand: "Okay, that's all for today, I'm going to say goodbye first."

……………

Walking through the silent streets and alleys, Chen Wenqiang was a little aimless, the road was so empty, only some poor people lying curled up and sleeping on the ground, in the village, in front of the store, and on the riverbank. His carriage had already left, and only the bodyguard Zhao Dayi did not listen to his orders, and stubbornly and loyally followed him more than twenty meters away.

The road - there doesn't seem to be much change around it, it's just getting older and older. The door was still open, and the inviting dim light inside was still the same. The walls are still green painted, but they have faded a lot, and the blinds are peeling off a bit. A man sat on a rattan chair, and when he saw Chen Wenqiang coming over, he looked at him with tired eyes.

The open door and the temptations it hid, as well as Neumann's description, seemed to hook Chen Wenqiang, and his pace slowed slightly.

"Do you want a young girl?" With the creak of the rattan chair, the man moved, speaking in a dull French.

A girl? Chen Wenqiang looked at the man and didn't speak for a while. Behind the disgust, he faintly felt an exciting stimulus. He was a little longing, eager to go upstairs, nodded proudly, found a woman, and ......

"Chinese, Portuguese, Filipino, or Japanese?" The man had an extra toothpick in his hand, picked the lower front teeth, and replaced it with Shanghainese, "Europeans are more expensive." Do you want three-inch golden lotus feet? What do you want? Come on, come in and have a look! ”

Suddenly, Chen Wenqiang's desire was gone, and he turned around and left quickly. The man behind him was shouting, but he couldn't hear anything, and he was ashamed of what he had just thought and done.

…………

Finding a bench by the river and sitting down, Chen Wenqiang looked at the boats with flashing lights on the river, and the light reflected on the calm water. The weather is dry and cool, and in another month, the cold of autumn will come, and it will be a year since he came to this world.

The dream before rebirth quietly emerged, the beach, the villa, listening to the tide, watching the sunrise...... Quiet and relaxed. Could it be that after changing the body and changing the times, it will no longer be remembered in the heart? No, it's not like that. Although I still think about it from time to time, because I know that the war of the past half century, and the current environment and conditions will make it difficult to make my dream come true, I retreat and deliberately avoid it.

Yes, the world is so big, where is the destination of your dreams? The current world is far from being as harmonious and stable as in the previous life, and even if you hide in a place that can survive the war, you can rest assured that racial discrimination and nationality discrimination are not something you can bear.

If I have a few years of struggle, I will almost be able to achieve my dream in China, except for the war and chaos in a few decades. Mixed up for decades? Chen Wenqiang couldn't help but smile bitterly and buried his face deep in the palm of his hand.

There is a saying that goes something like this: If war breaks out, please don't wait for me to be old and weak and unable to resist when I am in the prime of life.

Gradually, the sky turned gray, and behind this gray there was a faint red light. Chen Wenqiang raised his head and saw a mist rising from the river on the opposite bank, and the tappets of the crane and the chimney of the factory seemed to rise in the fog.

On this riverside road, three foreigners appeared, a man in front, a lady and a blonde girl behind. The lady carried the corner of the gray pleated skirt in one hand and led the little girl in the other, and walked gracefully. As she spoke, she stared sideways at the morning sun, which had just shown a blush, and the little girl jumped up and down, laughing crisply from time to time. There was something quiet and comfortable about them, which touched Chen Wenqiang's heart, so that he couldn't help but get up and follow a few steps.

However, Chen Wenqiang stopped, and let the symbolic tranquility and comfort slowly disappear, this will not be something lasting. Perhaps, the sudden coming and going away will make you feel self-comforting that you can experience, and will leave you with hope of liberation.

An Indian patrol came over, staring at Chen Wenqiang, who was staring at the two women who were gradually moving away, with a suspicious look in his eyes, clenching the baton in his hand, and glaring over.