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In 1907, it was another spring, and the new willow spat out tender yellow buds, and everything grew. The weather is getting warmer, although there is still a bitter chill in the north wind. The snow in Beijing has melted. Song Xiaofei received an urgent telegram from Li Yuanhong, the chief of civil affairs of Shaanxi, saying that the Fengxian girl was dying and wanted to see him for the last time. At the Political Consultative Conference of that year, there were still some days left, and Song Xiaofei rushed to Xi'an to see her for the last time.

Song Xiaofei's special train arrived in Xi'an, and Li Yuanhong took two plainclothes entourages to the station to greet him in person. Because Song Xiaofei greeted him in advance, traveled in plain clothes, and did not alarm the local officials, few people in the station knew that the president had come to Xi'an. When he left the station, Song Xiaofei was wearing a black fur coat and his face was expressionless. Since going to Beijing, he and the Phoenix Girl have not seen each other for almost ten years. Unexpectedly, when they said goodbye, she was critically ill. She is not yet forty years old. Life is really like a dream, and sometimes before you know it, it's time to wake up from the dream.

As he grew older, Song Xiaofei didn't know very well whether he had loved Miss Fengxian back then, and he didn't know if Miss Fengxian had liked him. The mood of the phoenix girl, many times, is just a faint appreciation, for her existence, feel close to joy. In this world, there is a person who looks almost exactly like Ouyang Xiaoxue, which is really an inscrutable and very interesting thing. He went to see her, firstly, out of compassion, and secondly, he also missed his youth a little. Everyone is like that, sometimes you miss someone and you actually miss yourself when you were younger. The innocent and simple time of life is like a white horse passing by. Being young is capital, you can do whatever you want, and you don't have to think about the consequences at all. Unlike now, the higher the position, the greater the ability, and the greater the responsibility on your shoulders.

Go to the carriage of the temple. In Song Xiaofei's mind, a few sentences from Wang Xizhi's "Lanting Collection Preface" emerged: The relationship between the lady and the admiration of the first life. or take all the embrace, and realize the words in a room; Or because of the entrustment, outside the wreckage. Although the fun is different, the restlessness is different, when it is happy to encounter. Temporarily get it for yourself, be happy and self-sufficient, and don't know that old age is coming. and what they are tired, their feelings change with things, and their feelings are related. Admired by it, between pitches. It has become an old trace, and it is still impossible not to rejoice in it. The situation is shortened and followed, and the end is at the end. He couldn't help but sigh: "Death and life are also great! Isn't it painful! Isn't it painful! ”

When Song Xiaofei's carriage arrived at the Gangji Temple, it was already evening, and the last blush of the sunset in the western sky fell. On the left and right sides of the temple gate, there is a pair of Pixiu, which is the original stone carving of the Tang Dynasty. Two bulging stone eyes are lifelike, and in front of the stone gate, two orange lanterns are hung high.

Li Yuanhong had already arranged everything. Song Xiaofei followed him to the west wing of the backyard, where the Phoenix Fairy girl lived. For more than 10 years, she has been living in this temple with a history of more than 1,300 years, it is a royal temple built by Princess Taiping of the Tang Dynasty for the blessing of her mother Wu Zetian, the name of the temple is taken from the "Book of Songs" "want to repay virtue." Haotian is reckless".

The temple is not big, simple and quiet, enter the mountain gate to the inside, it is three rooms, roughly divided into east and west two compartments, the east is the main hall of the Buddha gate, and the west is the bhikshuni homework. A resting place. Heading north along the trail, there is a stone pillar in the middle of a clearing on the left-hand side, engraved with the "Prajnaparamita Heart Sutra". In the wings on the west side. The phoenix girl did not wear plain clothes, but wore a blue cheongsam on a white background, holding a pipa in her arms, sitting in the room, plucking her hands lightly, and singing tactfully: "The mountains are green, the water is blue, the mountains and rivers rhyme, and the voice is like crying and complaining, like a sad cry." sighs, it is rare to ......have a confidant in life, and it is the most difficult to find a bosom friend through the ages, and the song "Bosom Friend" sang from her mouth, faint and resentful, like crying.

At the end of the song, Song Xiaofei stood outside the door for a while, pushed the door in, and the phoenix girl stood up and walked forward to salute. Her lips are pale, she speaks, coughs non-stop, and covers her mouth with a handkerchief from time to time, and she is still a delicate Jiangnan girl.

Since entering the room, Li Yuanhong and the others have retreated. Song Xiaofei looked at the little face of the phoenix girl, there were ten years between them, but they were still so familiar, just like him and Ouyang Xiaoxue, separated by time and space, but they hadn't forgotten it. People, sometimes it's like this, never have amnesia, but can't remember it for a while.

The room is very elegant, the sandalwood is curling, the wind chimes are dingdong, the Yilan Qinghua, the Hunan curtain is quiet, the inkstone has been washed, and the scroll has not been opened. Song Xiaofei glanced at the pale face of the Phoenix Fairy girl, and asked with concern, "Have you taken Western medicine?" ”

The impatiens said, "It's useless. My illness is in my heart. ”

"Let's go and see, in Western medicine, there are psychologists who can treat heart diseases." Song Xiaofei sat upright, casually drinking tea and chatting with her.

"Nope. My illness is caused by heaven and not by man. The phoenix girl said to Song Xiaofei: "I haven't seen you for so many years, you still look so young." Thank you for coming all the way to see me. ”

Song Xiaofei asked: "The phoenix girl eats fasting and recites the Buddha, and the lonely lamp is a fragment, is she really doing well?" ”

The fairy girl said, "Let's live like this." Some things are forgotten, and some things are never forgotten. Sometimes I thought I had forgotten, but when the wind blew, or the sound of rain on the plane trees, the memory came back to life. There are some things that you can't forget when you eat fasting and chant Buddha every day, and some things are unforgettable, for example, the smile of the third emperor, with melancholy, hangs on the corner of the mouth, if there is nothing. ”

The two chatted rambly for a while, and the Fengxian girl clicked the window paper between them: "Why don't you tell me that the third emperor has handed over my deed of sale to you back then?" ”

Song Xiaofei said, "How do you know? You haven't forgotten him? More than twenty years have passed. ”

The impatiens said, "It is painful to forget, as it was before, and it is true today." The pain of the past was because I couldn't remember it, but today's pain is because I am afraid that I can't forget it. You don't care how I know, tell me the truth. I don't want to leave this world with a grudge. ”

Song Xiaofei carefully looked at the delicate woman in front of her, the beauty in front of her, without powder, exhaled Ruolan, and there was a clear arrogance and coldness between her eyebrows, she was like a cluster of orchids in the mountain stream, a tree of cold plums, but unfortunately, Song Xiaofei had already felt the breath of returning to the light in the room. Song Xiaofei sighed and said, "Does it make a difference if I tell you the truth or not?" There are dead people living in your heart, and knowing the truth only adds to the last troubles. ”

The impatiens shook her head, tears streaming down her eyes. said: "If I love all my life, how can I be willing to go under the nine springs." If he didn't really love me, wouldn't it be ridiculous for me to give? Knowing the truth at that time will be extremely painful for me. ”

Song Xiaofei took a sip of hot tea and said slowly: "Love does not distinguish between right and wrong. You love someone too much. It is like a moth running towards a candle flame, burning desperately, just to find a moment of light and heat, but this is true love. If you care too much about gains and losses, then it is not true love. ”

The fairy girl nodded and sighed lightly, "My life." If I hadn't met the third emperor, I would still be the same me, occasionally dreaming of being good. I won't understand that in this world, there is a person like him, which is evocative and intoxicating. If life had never met. I don't believe that there is a kind of person who feels warm at first sight. ”

Song Xiaofei said, "Yes." A woman will only fall in love with one man for the rest of her life. This is the sorrow of a woman, but also the happiness of a woman. So back then, even if I really took your deed of sale, I would know it and couldn't bear to wake you up from my dream. Sometimes. You love someone very much, but it's actually just your own business, like a one-man show. It doesn't matter if he loves you or not. In the end, the person who touches you the most is yourself. But what does it matter. Didn't you choose it yourself? ”

The impatiens said, "Yes." Life is like a dream. There is some love, when we are young, we don't understand; And when we understand, we are no longer young. ”

Song Xiaofei said: "You are very brave. In this world. I've never dared to love someone too much. Because then, you will lose yourself. There is always a certain cause and effect. In life, if the person you like happens to like you, what a lot of fate and happiness it should be. So, stop asking me the truth. For love, the truth is sometimes not important. ”

The phoenix girl knew that Song Xiaofei would not tell her the truth, so she hugged the pipa and said to him, you come from afar, I will play a song for you, so she continued to sing: The mountains are green, the water is blue, the mountains and rivers rhyme, and the voice is like crying and complaining, like a sad cry. Sighing, it is rare to have a confidant in life...... After singing the song, she vomited a mouthful of blood on the lute in her arms, her body tilted, and she left this world quietly. At the corner of her mouth, there was a hint of a smile, and that smile seemed to be still sixteen years old.

Outside the window, the clear glow of a bright moon shone on this thousand-year-old temple, and Song Xiaofei felt a little cold on his body. He remembered a small poem he wrote to Ouyang Xiaoxue, entitled "I Know Time Will Eventually Get Old":

I know the time

Eventually, they will grow old

But, your steps

Can you take a break?

I don't want to

See it so quickly

Wrinkles on your forehead

And the vicissitudes in the eyes

I hope to heaven

Can give us a little more time

Let's be here

Even if it's an imperfect world

One more time of nostalgia

A little more sincere smile

I know

Time eventually gets old

Sunrise and sunset every day

Similar but different

I know every cherry blossom

It is the most brilliant at the moment of bursting

But it also withered

Well, can you

Give us a little more time

Quietly watch this flower bloom and fall

Let me stay with my heart

About your memory

I know the time

Eventually, they will grow old

I can't stop it

This great wheel of life

Ride in the wind and waves

I just want to

Quietly on deck

Look up at the starry sky

There are still years of flow

You stay in the wind

Those vows of love

Let's laugh happily

It's like never shedding tears

Let's live happily

It's like never dying

Time is getting old

It's old

Who can be in the universe

Laugh at us

Maybe there's really nothing there

We've cried and laughed

Loved, hated

I have resisted, I have been angry

I regretted it, I fantasized about it

Sighed, frustrated

Are we going to leave anything behind

We have nothing

The palms of our hands

Hold on to the world

The most difficult fate to hold

Life, to the final dawn

Just wait quietly

Or just fight it

our world

There will be a new sun rising (to be continued.) If you like this work, you are welcome to come to the starting point (qidian) to vote for recommendation, monthly pass, your support, is my biggest motivation. For mobile phone users, please go to m.qidian to read. )9