ps:ps: Lu Tianyi's love story is the epitome of the tragedy of the times, connecting the past and the next, and paving the way for the upcoming big reform

Lu Tianyi smoked not a cigarette, but loneliness. That kind of loneliness, like a chronic poison, made him break his liver and intestines, and finally embarked on the wrong path of murder without return.

Lu Tianyi learned to smoke when he knew that Luo Jiajia and Vice President Dong Guangwei had a leg. During that time, Luo Jiajia became indifferent to Lu Tianyi. When love is a thing of the past, they become the most familiar strangers. There is often only one door between happiness and misery in the world. Lu Tianyi's feelings for Luo Jiajia have brought him countless joys, their love, even if the material is scarce, but the warmth of joy, you can feel happy when riding a bicycle on campus. Today, these fond memories have become a source of unbearable suffering.

Lu Tianyi smoked cigarettes, looking very melancholy, and looked sluggish all day long: his eyes were sunken, he was mentally tired, he was slow to react, he was not concentrating in class, and he had a headache and a loss of appetite, which made his friend Ruan Yiyong very worried.

Although Lu Tianyi was born in a poor family, he studied hard and was admitted to the No. 4 Middle School in Beijing with the first place in the district, and finally became classmates with Ruan Yiyong and others, and then became friends with Ruan Yiyong, who was not very gregarious.

"Recently, there have been rumors in the University of Law that Luo Jiajia has a leg with President Dong. But this kind of thing, you can't believe rumors. Ruan Yiyong hoped that Lu Tianyi could regain his strengths and persuade.

Luo Jiajia would have a leg with Vice President Dong Guangwei, Ruan Yiyong didn't believe it at all. In his opinion, Dong Guangwei is the kind of person whose belly is so fat that he can't see his toes. It's not going to please girls anyway.

"It's not a rumor, I saw it with my own eyes. I saw Luo Jiajia get into Vice President Dong Guangwei's Mercedes-Benz with my own eyes. Lu Tianyi said.

Lu Tianyi found out that Luo Jiajia had a leg with Vice President Dong Guangwei, which was also accidental. Sunday afternoon. Lu Tianyi went to Luo Jiajia's classroom to look for her in the music elective class, but found that she didn't go to class. Lu Tianyi asked Luo Jiajia's roommate and was told that Luo Jiajia had just gone out. Lu Tianyi ran out of the classroom, arrived at the school gate, and saw Luo Jiajia enter the Mercedes-Benz. The car often rampages around the campus, and as soon as you look at the license plate, you know that it is the special car of Vice President Dong Guangwei. Lu Tianyi sat in a taxi and quietly followed. That night. When he returned to school very late, Lu Tianyi borrowed a cigarette from a classmate and lit it. In the curling smoke, he suddenly understood that although he had done nothing wrong, Luo Jiajia was no longer the simple girl who clocked in and bought chicken legs for him in the cafeteria. It's not Luo Jiajia who is looking for the four-leaf clover that represents happiness with him on the grass.

"Phew. I really didn't look away at the beginning, and sure enough, the beautiful girl couldn't be trusted. Ruan Yiyong felt that as a good friend of Lu Tianyi, it was necessary to express his indignation, and he snorted loudly and said, "So far, you can only talk to Dong Guangwei." Nguyen Nguyen said, "He should be morally corrupt." ”

Lu Tian nodded. Go and meet Vice President Dong Guangwei. But he was inexplicably weak-hearted, and his legs were weak. Lu Tianyi's subconscious. Vice President Dong Guangwei is a leader. No matter how incompetent the leader is, he is still a leader. When the scandal between Luo Jiajia and Vice Principal Dong Guangwei was in a uproar, Lu Tianyi listened to Ruan Yiyong's suggestion and persuaded Vice Principal Dong Guangwei to take care of his reputation, otherwise he would go to the school discipline inspection committee to report.

In order to embolden himself, Lu Tianyi grew a chaotic beard and ran to Vice President Dong Guangwei's office. At that time, Chen Guangxu, secretary of the school's Discipline Inspection Commission, was also there.

"What's the matter with you?" Dong Guangwei shouted when he saw a disheveled student suddenly break into his office.

"I ...... It's Lu Tianyi", Lu Tianyi trembled, as if he was on the edge of the abyss, he saw Vice President Dong Guangwei's serious expression, and he was so frightened that he was incoherent.

"I didn't ask what your name was, I asked you what you were doing." Vice President Dong Guangwei pointed to the secretary of the school's Discipline Inspection Commission and said loudly, "We are talking about work. ”

"What about you...... Get busy first", Lu Tianyi didn't know what was wrong, so he hurriedly said a perfunctory sentence and ran out of the door of the office.

On the last tracking, Lu Tianyi sneaked under the window of Dong Guangwei's villa, and heard the noise inside gradually subsided. Looking in from the window, Luo Jiajia looked like someone had been stripped of her clothes, one piece, one ...... Lu Tianyi's heart was beating hard.

That night, Lu Tianyi had a dream, the dark night, on the verdant four-leaf clover, Luo Jiajia's open lips and hot earlobes, trembling legs, and the faint light and distant sky shining in the silhouette of slender leaves. Luo Jiajia's beautiful legs were trembling, and a man was lying on Luo Jiajia's body. When he woke up, tears flowed backwards in Lu Tianyi's heart, and his heart couldn't be calm, as if a bright red wound had been torn and bleeding. He ran to the playground like a madman and yelled, but no one listened to him. Mournful cries like his are everywhere in the city of Beijing, who has time to pay attention to whom?

After that night, Lu Tianyi also learned to drink heavily, and he was very depressed all day. Nguyen Ngai Dung repeatedly exhorted him to quit drinking, but to no avail. Lu Tianyi said to Ruan Yiyong self-deprecatingly: "Brother, I drank because I wanted to drown the pain in my heart, but unfortunately, this damn pain learned to swim." ”

During that time, Lu Tianyi was very lonely, it was a kind of helpless pain that the flowers fell, it was the depression and helplessness that the pain could not find catharsis, for about a week, he was depressed, he ate very little, and almost starved himself to death in the bed of the dormitory.

At night, Lu Tianyi often wanders around the campus.

In the grove of the campus, the gasping of men and women is often heard, which indicates that someone is having a tryst inside. Sometimes, in a dimly lit place, a street lamp can be seen here or there, and the rest, except for the shadows cast by the trees, is boundless tranquility.

Before the weekend, Lu Tianyi went home on a biting cold winter afternoon. Out of the school gate, he was the only one left. When he was waiting for the bus, all he could think of was the scene with Luo Jiajia. Now she has changed her mind, and the grief in it is probably something that only Lu Tianyi himself can experience.

At the door of a restaurant, Lu Tianyi met a couple who were patting and dragging. Their wanton conversation and laughter added to Lu Tianyi's loneliness. His love, like a glass on the ground, shattered in an instant, and disappeared in the middle of lamentation and fantasy. It's been a long time, and it's incredible.

After about half an hour, Lu Tianyi was squeezed into the car by the flow of people who got on the bus, and his mind was slightly clearer. He was glad to have found a window seat in the back row, so he sat down in a hurry, not wanting to move for a moment.

Sitting in the car, Lu Tianyi's heart secretly prayed that the car would drive to a sunny place - Lu Tianyi was suddenly afraid of getting cold, and when he thought of his humble love, he couldn't help but burst into tears. The material hardship only teaches oneself to grit one's teeth and endure it, and it has nothing to do with it, but suddenly looking back, since he was born, until now, in the eighteen years now, which of the seeds and flowers he has sown is bright, and where has it ever borne fruit?

After thinking for a while, Lu Tianyi tilted his head out the window and closed his eyes—for fear that his tears would be seen. But it's okay if the eyes are not closed, but as soon as the eyes are closed, there is a more violent rush in the brain: "I wish to win the heart of one person, and the white head will not be separated", "I am willing to be a winged bird in heaven, and I am willing to be a branch in the earth", all of which are palindrome brocade characters woven by those boring literati in their warm dreams, can you believe it? Everything is illusory, real, only the current sad loneliness and the same sorrow as the spring water! This tender vein of oneself is the seed of sadness through the ages, and the tragedy of life probably sprouts here!

After getting off the bus and walking along the side street all the way to home, Lu Tianyi looked at the pedestrians on the street and the men and women living in the houses on both sides, and felt that they were all very satisfied, as if they didn't know what sorrow was, and his heart was inexplicably melancholy.

It's almost the Chinese New Year, and there are a lot of things to eat on the small streets of Beijing, such as rock sugar gourds, all kinds of pastries, and many flavor snacks that even Lu Tianyi can't name. He touched the soft sac on his body that was already shy and the belly that was already close to the front and back, and suddenly had a self-defeating thought in his heart: there was less money in the bag, and there was more hatred in his heart.

Before Lu Tianyi went home, he went to the old high school, and when he walked on campus, he always had a feeling of cold and twilight. A breeze blew from nowhere, and there was a little hurry, and with a kind of bitter chill, he could not help but shiver, and the words of the first few words of Rousseau's later work "The Dream of a Lonely Walker" came to his mind: "There are no brothers, no friends, no neighbors, no society in my own house except for myself." My own family has become a loner in this world."

Lu Tianyi felt that his own spirit was the same as the wind, so what else could he be conceited? In the past, I deceived myself, and always masturbated myself with the deeds of those who went through hardships and finally became great bloomers, but now I wake up from a dream, and I am in great pain, only to understand that not every storm in this world will have a beautiful rainbow after every storm.

Lu Tianyi wants to cry without tears, what kind of world is this? What kind of life is this? He couldn't figure out why the world was doing this to him. Love, something that no one has ever seen, is gone! The girl he once loved like life has nothing to do with him now. Such a reality, thinking about it makes Lu Tianyi feel very frustrated, but he has to accept this reality, love, what a torturous thing!

Lu Tianyi felt that Luo Jiajia was his only one, the only light in the sky of his gray life, but Dong Guangwei wanted to take her away, and he had no choice but to do a big thing in life. knew that he couldn't do it, but he had to do it - eliminate Vice President Dong Guangwei from the top. (To be continued......)