When the torches on the wall went out, when the endless darkness fell again, I closed my sore and damp eyes.

In the depths of my body, there was a small creature clinging to me, it knew my sorrow and fear, but it could not speak, it could only move its body to make me feel its faint presence.

"Don't worry, your father will come to save us, he is different from my father, he will come, he will." I hugged my stomach, and the fatigue and sleepiness that followed after the mourning made me a little dizzy, but I clearly remembered Mingyi's words, Wuxian didn't die, he just didn't know I was here.

I had a nightmare that I had for many years, and there was always a secret room where I couldn't see my fingers, and there was always a shivering person curled up in the corner of the secret room. Over the years, I have never wanted to escape from this nightmare, from my established fate with my mother. But now, this nightmare has come true. It's just that I can't count it even by a thousand calculations, and the face at the end of the nightmare is not Zhiyao, but Zhao Ying.

When I woke up from a nightmare, I had a terrible thought. Zhao Ying is about to die, if he had heard the nonsense of the monks when he was crusading against Xianyu in the north, then would he also be like Zhi Yao in order to seek immortality and Chang Zhao's family, and cut me out to take my son? Even if I am pregnant with the blood of his Zhao family?

Hongyun'er, where are you? Why haven't you come yet?

The long wait in the loneliness and darkness nourished the fear in my heart, and the slightest movement outside my cell would make my hair stand on end.

Deaf and blind jailers sometimes come to deliver food, and sometimes they miss the door and don't come. To him, I was no different from any prisoner who had died here before. He couldn't see, he couldn't hear, and on several occasions I tried to grab his hand so that he would at least know that I was a woman. But he never came near my cage, and every time he splashed his rotten food on the wooden fence like splashing water. Whether I could get enough or not, and how much I could eat, depended only on his strength at the time.

Half a month later, maybe a month, my poor little bud actually grew up in my belly, he lifted my foul-smelling clothes, I caressed him, he could move and tell me that he was still alive, still suffering with me, waiting together. Twenty years ago, I probably stayed with my mother in the same way, telling her that everything was okay with me and that everything would be fine in the future. The memories of Ah Niang that I can have in my life come to light one by one in the dark waiting, and sometimes I don't even dare to breathe, for fear that if I breathe a sigh of relief, she will disappear from my eyes, and the courage she gave me will also disappear. I loved her more than ever and hated my father more than ever.

But sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, she can't appear, and the person you hate to the bone will stand in front of you when you are most vulnerable, and say softly and skillfully: "My daughter, do you miss me?" ”

In the dungeon of Zhaofu, the deaf and blind jailer collapsed in the corridor outside my cell, his snow-white eyes staring wide. Not far from him, the corpses of the Black Armor Army were strewn across the dungeon's passages.

Zhao Ji didn't come alone, and behind him stood a red-haired thief. When I lay on the back of the thief and flew over the high walls of the Zhao Mansion like a bird, I suddenly felt that the world was far more complicated and crazy than I had imagined. Zhao Ji and thief, why are these two unrelated people together?

When the thief put me down, he took off his fur brown coat and wrapped me tightly, and then pulled my hair with a look of disgust, and said disdainfully: "How do you look like her." ”

I listened to his words and laughed, and I pulled his hand on my bulging lower abdomen, and I said: "The evil ghost who loves to eat the heart and liver of children, I hid in A-Niang's stomach back then and didn't see it clearly, you looked very heroic when you saved people, not like a thief, like a gentleman." ”

"Who's going to do what bullshit gentleman." The thief snorted coldly and withdrew his hand.

I wanted to tease him a few more times, but my eyes were black, and he had already fainted.

In the drowsiness, someone has been sitting in front of my bed, and the cool and slightly pungent fragrance of Jiang Lixiang on his body made me dream of the most beautiful city in the world on the bank of the river in early summer. In my dreams, there is the river breeze, the sea of flowers, the father who puts me on his shoulder and takes me to run and frolic, laughing loudly, the father I have never seen before, and makes A-Niang miss her life.

"Ah Shi, are you awake?" When I woke up from my dream, Xiang San, Ah Su, who was dressed in a blue dress, sat at the head of my bed and touched my forehead with concern.

"Wake up." I closed my eyes.

When I washed away the filth of my whole body and took the mirror from Ah Su's hand, I saw a face that looked like a skeleton in the mirror. Ah Su dressed me, layer after layer, she sighed and said, "I'm sorry, it's Sister Ah who is late and makes you suffer." ”

I sat back on the bed, unable to tell if she was real or fake: "Where is this?" I asked.

"Still on the way."

"Where are we going?"

"We're going to the southeast, and Sister will take you to Zheng Guo." Ah Su sat next to me and gently held my hand.

Zheng Guo? An ally of the Qi people.

"Where's Si'er? Where did you take her again? ”

"Wronged, I didn't arrest her this time, it was your father who sent someone to rescue her from the Zhao Mansion."

"Yes." He Zhao Ji had time to rescue Si'er from Zhao's mansion, but he let me stay by Wuxian's side in hindsight, he borrowed my medicine jar to poison people, and he wanted to borrow Zhao Ying's hand to let me die to Zhao's family, to Wuxian and a heart! Daddy, Daddy, why are you still calculating me after so many years, have you ever really regarded me as your daughter one day, even if it's only for a moment? I was depressed and angry, my eyes were sour, so I had to turn my face and say in a muffled voice: "Where is Si'er now?" I want to see her. ”

Ah Su touched my hair and said, "Miss Si'er left more than half a month earlier than you, and she may have arrived in Zheng Guo by this time." When we also arrive in Zheng Guo, you will naturally be able to meet her. Little sister, the child in your belly is Zhao Wuxian's, right? "Ah Su reached out to touch my stomach, my scalp was numb, and the whole person had unconsciously moved a step back.

Ah Su didn't see annoyance, only looked at my stomach with a smile and said: "The child in your belly is really hard, so many tosses, you have no human form, he still has the strength to hold you." It can be seen how much he likes you as a mother. Unlike the one in my stomach before, I had no conscience, I just ran away and cried twice, and he didn't want me anymore, and he looked like his father. ”