Li Xiaofeng looked at the floating clouds boredly, straightened the rubber stick he was holding in his hand, squinted his eyes and yawned. He is so stuffy, he stays here day after day, year after year, except for the archway-style porch behind him, there is not a single person talking around, not even a sound, it is as quiet as the dead silence before the big boss in the ghost movie appears.

Li Xiaofeng yawned again, stretched out his waist without image, took out his mobile phone and looked at it, only five minutes had passed since the last time he looked at it, and the time for the shift was still far away.

"Damn, isn't the time in heaven going slowly!" He grumbled and complained.

That's right, it's in the sky, or more precisely, it's the famous Nantianmen, the gate of the legendary Heavenly Court. And our protagonist Li Xiaofeng is the immortal standing guard outside the Nantian Gate - well, if the heavenly soldiers are also immortals, then Li Xiaofeng is an immortal. Of course, the other immortals of the heavenly court don't see it that way, just like the citizens of big cities don't regard migrant workers as their own people, the immortals of the heavenly realm don't think that a small heavenly soldier is an immortal, not to mention that this heavenly soldier is not a regular worker, a temporary worker is considered Cai Guoqing!

To be honest, Li Xiaofeng didn't feel that he was an immortal, and even in the circle of heavenly soldiers, he was a little out of place, and even a little discriminated against. Without him, there is a habit of seniority everywhere, and immortals, heavenly soldiers, and heavenly generals are not exempt from vulgarity. Because he joined the work too late - although Li Xiaofeng has been a heavenly soldier for ten years, it is nothing compared to those "old-timers" who have worked for hundreds of years, to say the least.

Of course, seniority is only one aspect, and the main problem is that Li Xiaofeng is a temporary worker and has no background, so it was a complete accident to do this promising job. And as we all know, in the fairy world, the backstage is very heavy, and you don't see that the monsters without a backstage in "Journey to the West" have been killed, and those with a backstage are just changing jobs.

That's right, the reason why Li Xiaofeng became a soldier was because of a traffic accident, and he still clearly remembers that day, when he happily came out of the talent market and was ready to celebrate that he had found a job at Foxconn, and was about to cross the street to go to the food stalls for a meal, a luxury sports car that sped past and crashed into the safety island sent him into the underworld.

Originally, according to the rules of the underworld, ordinary fart people died, even if they died unexpectedly, that is, they suffered less in hell, suffered less than two meals, and drank a bowl of Meng Po soup in Naihe Bridge earlier, and then what should they do.

But there was an accident here in Li Xiaofeng, judging from the book of life and death, this guy is not over his life, and he should have died of overwork at Foxconn ten years later. Now dying unexpectedly is not in line with the number of days, of course, you can't be reincarnated if you don't meet the number of days, and you can't explain the life and death without reincarnation - to put it bluntly, it has produced a butterfly effect, and the consequences are not big and serious.

Although the days are bluffing things most of the time, but without this bluffing thing, the gods can't play it, so if it has a problem, the little officials in the prefecture who are the size of sesame mung beans can't afford to be guilty. There's no way, check it out, and see who is so bold to change the number of days.

After such a search, Lord Yama immediately sat on wax, and the guy who killed Li Xiaofeng emotionally was not a mortal, but also a god in the sky. The one who caused the accident was the old son born to the thirty-second concubine of Erlang God, such as the deputy general of Tianmen in Tingnan today. The cause of the accident is said to be caused by this kid and the youngest grandson of Zhao Gongming, the god of wealth, in the nether world to grab a girl and race a drag race.

What to do? Lord Yama is also speechless, he is just a sesame mung bean official, where can he afford to provoke the two great gods of Erlang God and God of Wealth, not to mention that Erlang God is the nephew of the Jade Emperor, just say that the God of Wealth controls all the finances of heaven and earth, which makes his old man unhappy and does not allocate funds, they are civil servants not to say that they don't want to go out to sign the bill, but they are afraid that even the salary will not be settled. …,

The immortals can't afford to provoke them, so Lord Yama can naturally only find trouble with the little ghost, and with a wave of his big hand, he is ready to let Li Xiaofeng return to Yang, isn't it ten years of yang life, and it will be made up for you, anyway, it will be ten years of poor life! Although the method is good, but the variable that Lord Yan didn't expect has happened again, Li Xiaofeng really can't return to Yang, his body has been forcibly cremated by a powerful organization! It is said that everything is for harmony.

Well, although the gods are awesome, they are not omnipotent, there is a corpse that can be said to be in a state of suspended animation, but the corpses are burned to ashes, and people pop out of the urn, that is a real thriller, and this is naturally impossible to talk about.

In addition to scolding his counterparts in the realm for being too nimble, the poor king of Yama could only communicate with the above to see if he could find a way to fool this matter over. Who knew that the top of the road was very awesome, and he didn't like the small section-level cadre of the king of Hades at all, and even let him do it himself, and if he couldn't do it, he would pull his black gauze hat. The sad Lord Yan saw that he was about to retire, and he still wanted to mix the pension, so he had no choice but to use the small treasury to dredge the relevant departments, and find a temporary worker for Li Xiaofeng to fool this matter.

Later, Li Xiaofeng learned that most of the heavenly soldiers and many low-level immortals in the heavenly realm were in the immortal class like this, either one person attained the Dao chicken dog ascended to heaven, or the little immortal had to wipe the ass of the big immortal.

Anyway, since then, Li Xiaofeng has become a glorious little heavenly soldier, although the welfare is not good, but after all, he can be regarded as a civil servant in the heavenly realm, he does not worry about food and drink during drought and flood, and his wife, children, car, and house do not have to worry, not that the heavenly court has all covered. It's that these things are not in line with the rules of heaven, how can an immortal who works in the heavenly court be able to think about it? These are all places that do not conform to the mainstream values of the civil servants of the Heavenly Realm! So it's all no fun!

However, this is not to say that the heavenly realm cannot develop a normal relationship between men and women, and I don't think where there are so many romantic affairs of the gods. Of course, this is also formal and reasonable, according to the Heavenly Court Propaganda Department, these immortals are not Sifan, but go to the lower realm to observe the people's feelings, of course the leaders must mingle with the masses, otherwise how to communicate deeply, otherwise how to observe the people's feelings in the lower realm?

As for the crystallization that is not very harmonious, it is force majeure, just like hurricanes, floods, earthquakes, and volcanic eruptions. Besides, everything should also be looked at the progressive and meaningful side, just staring at force majeure and saying things is not in line with objective laws!

Li Xiaofeng also wants to understand the people's feelings, but it's a pity that he is not qualified, to put it mildly, you are a gatekeeper who wants to understand the people's feelings, do you want to learn the advanced work experience of the nether city managers. The superiors said that violent law enforcement is not right! Especially in the warm and harmonious family of Heavenly Court, how could violence be abused? Didn't God say that if someone hits you on the left cheek, you have to stick the right cheek over it to make the family feel good. Although God is a fart, how can I say that this is in line with the creed of civil servants serving the people?

So Si Fan's matter, Li Xiaofeng will not have to think about it for the time being, maybe in another two or three thousand years, when he has made up enough years of service to become a regular, and then he has enough filial piety to the leader to be unexpectedly transferred, and looks forward to the old qualified soldiers in front of him after all the hiccups, and then think about it to be realistic. Nowadays, he can only watch cavalry and infantry films on his mobile phone at most, and exercise the five girls.

is just a cranky thought, Li Xiaofeng looks forward to getting off work like the stars and the moon, but what he looks forward to is often not the bell of getting off work, but the thunder of overtime.

"Boy, go to Tushi Palace to report after work!" The sound of an urn and the sound of an urn directly poured cold water on Li Xiaofeng.

Look at the one in front of me with Harley FAT on his shoulder

BOY motorcycle, but the person is as thin as a bamboo pole, his head is dyed with a pinch of red hair, a pinch of green hair, the eye shadow is as black as a panda, a big gold chain as thick as a dog chain with a little thumb, there is no shortage of earrings, nose rings, and tongue studs, and he is completely dressed as a hippie, Li Xiaofeng has no good feelings. It's not that this person is dressed too non-mainstream and makes him unaccustomed to it, it's entirely because this guy is his enemy - it was this guy who sent Li Xiaofeng to Huangquan Road ten years ago, and now he is the second generation of the official of his top boss. …,

To be honest, Li Xiaofeng is very entangled, if you want to say that you don't hate this guy, it's false, but you can't talk about how much you hate it, after all, even if he doesn't die, his work unit is not a good company. Although this heavenly soldier should also be aggrieved, there is no danger to his life after all! So until the FATBOY who drove Harley hit the road, he didn't think about how to reply to people. But it seems that people don't need his answer, and they simply ignore him.

"What did the general tell you?"

When Li Xiaofeng was stunned, the successor also came. Seeing that the deputy general, who had always been on the wrong path with Li Xiaofeng, talked to him for the first time, this person's gossip heart was hooked, and he naturally wanted to ask for an understanding.

"Let me go to Tushi Palace after work!" Li Xiaofeng replied angrily.

"Tushi Palace?" The successor was obviously stunned, everyone knew that the Dao Tushi Palace was an important place in the heavenly realm, the residence of the Taishang Laojun. Usually, these low-level civil servants don't say that they go shopping, and they are guilty of looking at them twice. What kind of shit luck did this Li Xiaofeng take, he was able to catch the door of the deputy general who has always been wrong, and he was able to go to Tushi Palace for a trip, maybe this trip will be able to turn positive!

Li Xiaofeng rode the Phoenix brand bicycle he bought from the second-hand market in the heavenly realm, and went to the Tushi Palace with a creak. This is still his salary advanced for ten years before the mortgage, don't look at the old style, but it is also the work of Tiangong Luban's personal disciples, clean and environmentally friendly, does not cost fuel, and belongs to low-carbon transportation. Of course, it's nonsense to say how good this broken car is, the land price in the core area of the main heavenly court is really outrageous, and the immortals who rent a house there have to sell blood, and Li Xiaofeng can only make do with it in the suburbs, but the heavenly realm is really ridiculously big, from the suburbs on the edge to the core area, it is tens of thousands of kilometers, and he is really late for commuting without a means of transportation, otherwise he will not buy such a broken thing if he is killed.

Li Xiaofeng went to the Tushi Palace to report in a dashing manner, but the successor took this matter to heart, and said it to the brother who succeeded him, sighed a few words of Li Xiaofeng's shit luck, and seemed to regret that he had been too cold to this person for ten years, otherwise if he showed favor earlier, he might be able to take a ride.

The one who said it was drooling and spitting together, but the one who listened to it snorted very disdainfully, and by the way, he gave the speaker a hygienic eye, and sneered directly: "You think that kid is really lucky, wake up your spring and autumn dream!" You don't count the days! is still turning positive, but I'm afraid that the kid has been wiped out by this time! ”

"Count the days?" This one was stunned for a moment, and asked rhetorically: "I went out to see the yellow calendar, today is not a big day!" ”

"Are you confused, haven't you forgotten the once-in-500-year catastrophe?"

"Tribulation!" The man scratched the back of his head, "Isn't it only two hundred and fifty years since the last time?" ”

The one who said it sneered again: "You are confused, can the numbers on the paper be accurate?" Last time, I said that I would manage it for a thousand years, but it turned out to be broken in less than 500 years. Besides, you still don't understand the moisture of our Heavenly Court construction project, how many immortals are waiting for this piece to make a fortune, and you have to listen to these five hundred! ”

The one who listened to it slapped his head violently, and cold sweat came down: "How did I forget this stubble, brother, how much benefit do you say Lao Jun and Zhao Xingjun can fall this time?" ”

The one who said it stretched out his palm and compared a number: "It has to be this number!" ”

Of course, Li Xiaofeng didn't know the whispers of the two of them, and after entering the Tushi Palace, under the instructions of a beautiful fairy official, he signed a bunch of contracts written in the Book of Heaven, and was given a nine-turn golden pill. To be honest, this is a rare good thing, and it is said that one grain can make mortals reborn and build immortal foundations. Li Xiaofeng really couldn't figure out what he had signed in exchange for such a treasure, but he knew that even if he sold him, he couldn't afford to buy a little of this golden pill powder. …,

This stupid boy didn't know what to do, he was still sold. Since beating Nuwa to make up for the sky, even if a time bomb has been planted in the entire fairy world, no matter how powerful and powerful Nuwa is, it is impossible to go against the sky, and now the original sky is broken, where can the acquired things be made up. Therefore, the hole that is patched up has a service life, and it will have to be repaired again after thousands of years.

Of course, Nuwa Niangniang is a compassionate god, her old man is dedicated to the people, and naturally she will not cut corners, but the younger generations of these immortals are not so good at ethics, the five-color stone is an ancient spirit stone, it is a rare treasure!

Since it is a baby, some people covet it, so the gods of the younger generations came up with a way to cut corners for the lack of great virtue, the five-color stone because of the spirit, so it can make up the sky, and the human is the spirit of all things, although the spirituality is not as big as the five-color stone, but it is always a spiritual thing, of course, from the next captive to make up for the sky and hurt the sky, although the fairy belly is black but can not be so straightforward. Besides, ordinary people have limited spirituality, and I am afraid that only by slaughtering human beings can they make up for the sky. If you can't use people, you can only retreat to the second, the gods are changed by people, and the immortal bodies of the natural gods are more different from mortals, and the spirituality is greater, which is the best raw material to replace the five-color stone.

Of course, even the Jade Emperor can't casually sacrifice immortals to make up for the sky, this is a bit discordant after all, and it is easy to provoke internal contradictions. But the heavenly soldiers are different, there is no immortal gold, and the number is not a few, and there will be no immortals who are full of food and care about their life and death, and they can also vacate a group of personnel to solve the problem of redundancy, and it is very suitable to use it to make up for the sky.

So as soon as Li Xiaofeng stuffed this nine-turn golden pill into his mouth, the originally pleasant female heavenly official behind him changed his face, and suddenly his hand fell with a knife, and a hand knife slashed at the back of his head. Poor Li Xiaofeng didn't understand what it was like to turn the Nine Turns Jindan, and he fell to the ground like a broken bag, Rao is so that the beautiful Tianguan is still jumping and scolding the street:

"Bastard with a thousand knives, why did you eat it! Now the loss of the old lady is great! ”

Although the emotional heavenly soldiers can make up for the sky, their spirituality is limited, so Lao Jun sent down the nine-turn golden pill to strengthen his body, but then again, this nine-turn golden pill is also a treasure, and naturally some people are worried about it, and it was originally taken out to make a show, but Li Xiaofeng came directly and swallowed it in one bite. How can you say that she is not angry, the consequences of a woman's anger are naturally very serious, so poor Li Xiaofeng was dragged into a small black room like a dog......

"Lao Li, your materials are too thin!" The God of Wealth looked at the ratio of materials used by Taishang Laojun, and couldn't help but be a little worried, "The foundation of these heavenly soldiers is too thin, and the spirit stones refined are too fragile, so you have to order some good materials like last time." It's no joke when the sky breaks! ”

Taishang Laojun stroked his long beard and wrote lightly: "Lao Zhao, your courage is too small, although the spirit stone is not as good as the five-color stone, but with the old man's nine-turn golden pill, it is still no problem to last for one hundred and eighty years." Do you think about it, for so many years, we can get another vote, and if we are so strong, won't we ruin our own financial road? This public thing is not greedy for white, not greedy! ”

The God of Wealth thought that this was also the case, anyway, the Jade Emperor didn't expect to solve the problem once and for all, but he was cautious by nature and reminded: "Forget it, Lao Li, your golden pill is also getting more and more vacation year by year, I just need you to take it easy, this time the old man is a little unhappy, saying that the day you make up for it is not a top once." Although we are engaged in the business of making a fortune, we also have to work for a long time......"

"An-la! Ann! You can rest assured that I will do something! After that, Taishang Laojun waved his sleeves and stuffed Li Xiaofeng, who was unconscious with a blue nose and swollen face, into the gossip furnace with his head down, and ordered: "Qingfeng, Mingyue, you brothers don't be lazy, watch the fire well." This seat and Zhao Shenjun went out to cool off, and came back in 7749 days to check your work again! ”…,

Qingfeng and Mingyue looked at each other speechlessly, the temperature in this Dan room is not low, even if the gods stay for a long time, they can't stand it, and Taishang Laojun is notoriously stingy, and the cost of buying air conditioning and the high temperature subsidy approved by the above were directly stuffed into his own purse by the old man, and he only bought two broken electric fans to make up the number. Do you say that blowing a fan in the boiler will work?

"It's a hard life!" Qingfeng sighed and was about to add fire, but Lu Dao Mingyue was smarter than him, so he grabbed him and said with a smile: "Brother, are you going to add fire?" ”

Qingfeng wondered: "How can you do alchemy without adding fire?" ”

Mingyue smiled and said: "Brother, you are too honest, we are here to die and live, but who is thinking about us?" Besides, it's not like you haven't heard what the master just said, as long as you can last for a hundred and ten years. What are we doing with such a hot burn? This day is always going to break, anyway, it always has to be mended, it's not bad for our brothers, what's the difference between one more year and one less year? Why bother? Why bother? ”

Qingfeng thought about it, this is so fucking right! Even the master is not a good thing, so why bother to suffer for yourself? Let's take the simmer and boil it slowly! Not bad for those two years!

It is said that bureaucracy kills people, but God seems to have played a big joke with Li Xiaofeng, the inactive bureaucrats killed him, and the inactive bureaucrats were ready to kill him, but at the end of the day, it was the cheating bureaucrats who left him a glimmer of life.

If the breeze and the moon burned the Dan furnace to death, he would really inevitably be destroyed. But these two people are afraid of heat, so they only boil it slowly, and Li Xiaofeng was lucky to snatch the Nine Turns Golden Pill into his mouth, which can be regarded as surviving the ordeal of 7749 days.

Although the three souls and seven spirits were all refined to the point of incompleteness, they still retained a breath of air. When he was pasted into the sky as "artificial cement" with many unfortunate brothers, this originally peaceful young man was already full of anger, to be honest, no one could swallow this breath, if he didn't want to take revenge, it was really a vain person.

A year has passed, two years have passed, three years have passed...... Ten years have passed, every day Li Xiaofeng thinks about breaking free from the spirit stone that imprisons his soul, as the old saying goes, Yugong moves mountains, Jingwei reclaims the sea, and a drop of water can also pierce the stone. What's more, this was originally a tofu scum project, so with someone's unremitting efforts, these spirit stones that barely stuck to the wall of the sky slowly cracked at a speed invisible to the naked eye, until that day with a violent roar, the whole sky was shattered, and everything, whether it was a god or a mortal, was like a piece of glass that was shattered, blown apart, and with the death of heaven and earth, this piece of heaven, this piece of time and space, leaving only a deep black hole......