Before you know it, another month has passed, happy September!

It seems that every time the month is handed over, I am suffering from the doubts of everyone who reads this - the last time it was the question that the progress was too fast, and the Asuka was taken down at a rapid pace, which is simply unreasonable!

This time, it seems to be more serious, many book friends say that I write too "realistic", or the reality I imagined, which is very unfriendly to readers, and it is not easy to read, and what I say is not the real situation, which seems a little "poisonous".

For example, Qiu Yang's indecision, for example, Hayakawa Shenglai's "bad eyes".

I don't want to answer this question head-on, but I want to say something about myself, maybe after listening to this, maybe everyone will understand a little bit why I have my insistence.

If you just want to read the plot of a pure novel, it doesn't hurt to skip this chapter - there is an update today.

When I was in junior high school and high school, I went on a neon study tour, and it wasn't very long, it was more than two months like this - I learned about AKB when I was in junior high school, and I learned about Nogizaka in high school, AKB because of my father (laughs), and Nogizaka was introduced by my senior.

So I'm a fantastic fan, most of them are five or six years older than me, about the same age as my fans? I talked to a neon senior about idols before, and I said seriously that I had eaten Mariko Shinoda and the shocked look he showed is still unforgettable.

After all, Wang Mazi is one round older than me...... (laughs)

However, I position myself differently than many fans.

In recent years, I have been playing in Japan every year, as long as time permits, I go by the way to take advantage of the full grip (unfortunately there is no bridge at that time), and I participated in it once, which is half a Buddhist handshake kitchen.

But unexpectedly, in terms of purchasing power, I don't have much interest in the periphery, at most I buy and buy photo albums, which is simply a sales hindrance compared to my current emotional investment.

In front of the screen, I don't even watch every issue in the fortification, obviously I like to watch some stages and music, but I haven't even been to the venue-level live......

Hey, to put it bluntly, I'm still young, and my mobility is greatly lacking.

Because of some special reasons, I'm quite busy with my studies, and my personal time is very limited (so after a while, it is likely that there will be an adjustment of the update time), so before joining the book friend group, I didn't add any organization, and I didn't have any friends in my life who were also purple people, and I rarely confided in my past experience as a rice idol.

I've always liked it half-tepidly, cowering in my little shell.

On the contrary, during the frequent days of going to neon, my idol and my life were very separate. To put it bluntly, I'm at most a lover of idol culture, and I don't have any real feelings, I just think that "ah, my sisters are so good-looking" has almost nothing to do with my life.

So maybe it's because of my special experience and my young age, it's really hard for me to empathize with the emotions of many idol chefs (not offended), but there are a lot of superfluous and different emotions.

Last year, academic problems kept me away from the little idol, and this year, because of special reasons, I can't go to neon, plus some twists and turns of personal feelings, I found that my mood is changing, in a word, it is probably "little don't win the newlywed"?

I found that I seemed to have real feelings for a mostly false, well-painted image, which was very unacceptable to me, to put it bluntly, ZQSG.

So, because of my age and experience, I always stupidly felt that maybe I became a monk of Dongda, at least in terms of ability, I could give her a desired future after graduation, but the difference was just an opportunity.

However, every time I see this or that, explicit or rumored, communication information about the idol world, I will think, "Ah, I'm not enough", or "He can't be so good, how can I be". As I wrote in the previous chapter, Qiu Yang felt that by the time he had struggled for a few years to gain a firm foothold, the two would have drifted apart.

That's the case, I'm not as good as Qiu Yang, after all, he is an idealized me.

Looking at my own description of myself, in fact, everyone can see that I am an awkward person like Qiu Yang in my pen, very indecisive, with a lot of ideas and trouble, and at the same time, I am more inclined to realistic thinking, and my mother-in-law and mother don't look like a male protagonist at all.

Although I fell in love with it because of a false image, my real feelings were invested in the reality of the individual. Not only the love for the bird, but even the emotion of Nanamin, which was originally just admiration, is quietly transforming into a different emotion, which has not even appeared in the turmoil of 17 years. (Looking back at that issue of Wenchun now, it really makes me angry.) ）

- Is this the growing pain?

The love of idols has invaded my life, it has been a source of pain for me lately, and I can't balance myself.

So, this book is my outlet.

The explanation for the previous question, which does not know so far, is not enough. -

Actually, it's a bit of a strong argument and a bit of a non-answer, but what I want to describe is just a story that has been conceived in my heart for a long time, and if there is some offense in the middle, I really can only apologize for the time wasted......

However, I'll consider taking into account everyone's preferences in the future, seriously! After all, if no one reads, I'll just write more and more. So, I originally planned to use two or three rolls of knives, but now I have adjusted it......

Actually, after fifty chapters, there are a lot of bad reviews, and the number of collections is also true. As an author, I must be a little lost, even autistic.

But no matter what, I'll keep writing it - after all, I've figured out that the next time I see Azuka (most likely not at the handshake party), no matter what my identity is, I'm super proud to say:

"Eh, I wrote you a book, lots and lots of words. And one or two people, because this book likes you a little more. ”

It's very handsome, I think.

At the end, I attached a 18-year-old repo, and it was also the last time I saw a birdie.

- Looking at it now, I really didn't feel in love at all at that time, myself.

……

Taxi: "Asuka xx Zhang"

Me: "I'm back." ”

Bird: "Welcome back, ah, it's my brother who is very good at Japanese." (It's already obvious that I'm tired)

Me: "Hey! It's excessive. (Actually, I felt that I was so happy to be remembered for a short time that I was dying.,I've heard that birds really can't recognize it.,After all, there are too many people.,It's probably me who once again revealed the identity of a foreigner under the age of the year.,Plus at that time, Japanese was really only at the level of daily conversation.,It's too recognizable.,But I didn't tell her the name.,Anyway, I can't remember.。 ）

Bird: "fufufu~ was originally there. ”

Me: "I'm here on a tour, I've actually been here a few times before, so Asuka must have forgotten." (Actually, I only had three full grips before, and none of them had one hand.) ）

Bird: "I remember. (An absolutely deceptive look)

Bird: "Speaking of which...... Not in school? Study hard! (I don't remember if this is the sentence, and I didn't particularly understand it, but I just asked if I didn't go to school or something, and then I went up.) ）

Me: "Hey! Don't look down on people, I'm going to go to the University of Tokyo! ”

Bird: "Good, good. (smiling perfunctorily)

(Push Away)

Bird: "-I'll come back next time." ”

……