Shima:

I left, with a brocade box of memories that contained our affection, our friendship, the words that had been spoken and those that had not yet been spoken. I returned home, and London made me miserable. I know you'll call the train station and come straight to my house as soon as you come back from Berlin. I'm afraid, afraid of your boiling passion, and afraid of the feelings in my own heart, the fire, that will burn us both to death.

Forgive my cowardice, I am still an immature girl, I dare not throw myself into that dangerous vortex at once, causing misunderstanding and accusation from relatives and friends, the noise and slander of society, I still do not have the courage and strength to fight all this. I can't afford to lose my father's favor and the peace of life that school and art brought me to prematurely. I lowered my sails, rejecting the temptation of the sea and fleeing the lapping of the waves......

As I said, I've seen so much that I'm no longer amazed at what happened in life. But this is a proverb, the proverb of an arrogant person. Actually, I was fragile, as fragile as a twilight wicker, unable to withstand any wind and rain.

I can't forget it, and I can't stand those eyes. The last time you and Youyi went to Germany, and I, Dad, and Brother Xiying were bidding you farewell, the moment the train started, you and Youyi stuck our heads out of the window, and next to your face, she looked at me with a pair of eyes of grief, despair, pleading, and jealousy. I trembled. She saw all the secrets that pierced my heart.

In fact, when you accompanied her to say goodbye to us, I heard that she was going to leave you alone for Germany, and I understood that the relationship between the two of you had changed. I don't understand what the cause is, but it doesn't have anything to do with me. I really admire Youyi's calm and calm demeanor, it is not easy to do this, and I will never be able to do it. She treated me so kindly, of course, not pretending, I cried all night after you left, mostly for her. Shima, I understand your pursuit of true love and happiness, and there is nothing wrong with that; I beg you to understand my understanding of Youyi's grief. She treats you well, you said it's not real love, but you've gained this kind of genuine affection, Shima, you're already very blessed. Although you don't hold a grudge against me, I don't want to be understood as the main source of your separation. Her departure made it impossible for me to live in London any longer. I want to escape, to flee far away, to flee back to my homeland, and let the shady palms and deep ancient houses shelter me and shelter my restless heart.

I can't wait for you to come back to make this decision. In that case, maybe the decision will never be made. I said to my dad that I was homesick, homesick, and wanted to return to China immediately. He didn't ask anything, but I knew everything was clear to him, he knew me, and he would always be my best friend. He agreed. It just so happened that he received a letter from China, and he also had the intention of returning to China once, and just like that, we left this foggy capital where I had more tears than smiles.

I can't be wise like any Arab who breaks the pot and doesn't go back, I'm a woman, and I can't help but drag the mud and water, and cast a nostalgic glance at the "past". I leave this last purple letter - purple, the color of sorrow, melancholy, and tragedy that I like, is a symbol of our encounter in life.

Gone, but am I really gone? Do I really take back everything that was left in your life? And did you really give back everything you left in my life?

Will we ever meet again? Will you continue to have that broken dream?

I can't tell. Leave it all to the three old women who spin the thread, and let their mysterious hands pull at the thread of our lives, maybe, maybe...... It's just that I don't look forward to it, I don't pray.

Emblem

P· S. You haven't studied well for a while, so you should calm down and work hard now, hoping that you will use the light of wisdom to illuminate the gloomy literary world as soon as possible.