The First Half of Liu's "Nerves" Life (1)

The reason why the title of this article is written like this is because Liu "Nerve" was already 40 years old when he completed his sentence, and it can be said that a person who lives to be 40 years old can be regarded as half of his life. Of the 40 years of Liu's life, 25 years have been spent in prison.

He is a legend in prison, he represents the personality characteristics of those prisoners with long sentences, who have been in prison for too long, and to understand him is to understand another group of people in society, and to understand another way of life exists.

The world believes that human living conditions cannot be separated from water, sunlight and air, and that human spiritual living conditions are inseparable from loving and being loved. Liu "Nerve" Since the age of 14, the three elements of his life no longer exist in the sunshine, but he has survived tenaciously, he has no love, nor is he loved, but he is still active.

The limits of life and spirit are often beyond our imagination. When a person has frustration and frustration, when a person no longer attaches importance to his own life, when a person learns that there is a Liu "nerve" still alive, I think that there is no frustration and frustration in the world, and the life of a person living in a free space is very splendid.

Liu "Nerve" is not a nervous person, his big name is Liu Shengjin, and changing his name to "Nerve" is not because everyone wants to use the homonym "Shengjin", but because he is too clever, and he can't find a good word to describe him above the cleverness, so he simply uses the word "nerve" to call him.

In the labor camp, in this home that is most suitable for his survival, he does not have any difficulties, his difficulty is that after the full sentence, "freedom" makes it difficult for him to take a step, when he walks into "freedom", he is too strange, when he leaves freedom, he is only 14 years old, he has not yet understood the grass and trees under the blue sky and white clouds.

I would like to explain in detail the word "nerve" in Liu's "nerve". "Jing" is often mentioned in the labor camp, when a person plays with other people's hands and feet, it can be called "Jing" more, when a person is looking for trouble for others, when a person pretends to be sick and resists labor, when a person is dis......liked by others, in short, all words and deeds that are considered unsatisfactory can be called "Jing" more. The "nerve" of Liu's "nerve" should not be derogatory, because his "nerve" has gone beyond the scope of "jing", and he has turned "jing" into a god, a ridiculous one, and one that is acceptable.

In June 2003, when Liu Nerves was in our prison team, I had already graduated from here in the first phase, and after graduating from the prison team, I was still serving my sentence in the small courtyard of the prison team as a new prisoner. He and I are two units, a bungalow with half of the prison team and half of my unit, the third prison area.

Liu Nerves is the most eye-catching person in the prison team.

It stands to reason that new prisoners in the prison team must go through the queue, and there is no reason for others to escape except for the special old, weak, sick and disabled.

However, in the prison, I often see such a person. He was healthy, but he collapsed on the grass and smoked while others were walking in the queue. Knowing Liu Nerves also started here. Liu Nerves always greeted the old criminals generously, whether they were familiar or not.

The first time he was called out and chatted, he was like a person I knew very well, talking about the classic language of the labor camp that I seemed to understand, and I felt a concern from his remarks, and I couldn't get familiar with him if I wanted to, but at that time, his name was Liu Shengjin, and he hadn't called him Liu Nerve, he was very good at hyping himself, and for three or five days, he didn't know Liu Shengjin.

The prison team is a place to receive training for new prisoners, and the western film we see always calls the army's training camp the devil's training camp, what should this training camp in the prison be called? One word - bitter, he is a bitter place, almost every new prisoner will feel the bitterness of this place, every new prisoner treats every day of his life in prison with standardized words and deeds and a depressed look, and his freedom and indulgence are incompatible with the management of the prison team.

He was a prisoner who had been in prison for 20 years, he was a man who had been in prison for 20 years, he was a man who had been in prison and had been crying out to escape, and he had been crying out for suicide. All this made him a special person, a person who cadres did not dare to exert pressure, and criminals did not dare to underestimate him.

When he was in prison, he brought with him a diary, which had about 10 pages of things that he had asked someone to help write while he was in the detention center.

He liked this diary very much, this diary recorded his thoughts and world view, because of the existence of this diary, he also seemed to think that he was a person of great taste and culture.

From the day he was imprisoned, his diary was widely circulated among the prison team. The prisoners also watched, and the cadres also watched.

The prisoners laughed and shook their heads, saying that he was too bold to write anything. The cadres looked at it with serious expressions, but there was a little bit of appreciation under the serious expressions, as for what he wrote, he was also going to show it to me at that time, but I didn't have the energy to read it because of other heavy concerns at that time, so I refused. When I refused to look at his diary, he looked regretful.

Because of my special personal situation at that time, I didn't plan to get closer to Liu Nerve, so at that time, everyone else knew Liu Nerve, and I heard more of his story. Although I am not close to Liu Nerve, Liu Nerve, if you don't know him, he can't do it, he is always writing and acting in all kinds of farces, and these farces have to make people care about him.

The new prisoners were very honest when they entered the prison, because they didn't understand the rules here, and the absolute power of the team leaders, who often gave them obscenity. Strict and cumbersome rules and human pressure put heavy shackles on people's actions and thoughts.

From the first day of Liu Nerve's entry into the prison team, he is different from others, he has no intention of being honest, he is always active, especially when dealing with those "crooked" team leaders, he is not as low as others.

The "oil" of Liu Nerve's (oil: a common saying in the labor camp, referring to those who are unrestrained in their words and deeds) made the team leaders very uncomfortable to see, and the team leaders would never allow a new prisoner to be released from prison, and could talk to them on an equal footing, and did not allow every behavior of the new prisoner to be without their approval, especially the leader of the group with Liu Nerve.

The team leader is the "elite" selected from among the old prisoners, and to put it in a unified way, it is those who have been reformed well and have served as soldiers that can reach this post, but in fact it is different, the inmates who go to this post are all "exceptional", and they do not need those harsh conditions to take up their posts, as long as there is one condition, and this condition is not easy to elaborate.

The privileges of the group leaders can be seen in their expressions, in their words and deeds, and more intuitively, in their living conditions.

A cell was full of twenty-eight people, bunk beds, bed to bed, and if a cell was completely full, it could accommodate thirty-two people. However, the team leader occupies a bunk for four people, and the team leader sleeps in a single bed, and there is a desk in front of the bed, and the desk is equipped with an office chair, which is only the privilege of the team leader reflected in the residence.

In life, the team leader is also equipped with a "secretary", and the "secretary" helps him write and draw. In addition, the team leader is also equipped with one or two "water boards", which are specialized in laundry, cooking, and washing dishes for the team leader. A domineering team leader is the "emperor" of a prison cell. Of course, it is good to have a few team leaders.

The leader of Liu Nerve's group should be okay, and he is usually not too public. But Liu Nerve's performance made him a little unacceptable. Liu Nerves always finds people to talk to, smoke, walks in queues and is lame, others are also poor, and there is nothing to compliment the group leader in life. All this made the team leader bored with Liu Nerve.

Once, Liu made a small mistake and inadvertently damaged the incandescent lamp in the cell, and the team leader punished him by making him stand in the corridor of the cell. Liu Nerves did as the team leader asked him to do indignantly. He's a smart guy, and he knows that this place is going to end up in a tough way.

On the night of being punished, Liu Shen found an old toothbrush, and he "sneaked" to sharpen the toothbrush. said that it was "sneaky", in fact, it was a ghost he deliberately made, but he deliberately did not let the team leader see it, he did not avoid other people, he also specially grinded when there were many people, and said while grinding: "Lao Tzu wants Lin XX (team leader's name) to die." "Be a face with a hatred as deep as the sea.

A toothbrush that needs to be sharpened and can be finished in just a few moments, but he grinds it for two days. He was deliberately delaying time, not really wanting to kill Lin XX, he wanted to set aside this time for people to report to Lin XX, and wanted to scare Lin XX.

Indeed, someone reported it to Lin XX, and Lin XX reported it to the cadres again, and the cadres confiscated the toothbrush he had grinded, and he was also called to the cadre's office and was scolded by the cadre. While in the detention center, Liu was already convicted of being a stubborn and dangerous element. If he hadn't been condemned as a stubborn and dangerous element before this, he would have had to suffer a lot of flesh and skin.

The news that Liu Nerf wanted to kill Lin XX was quickly spread. Liu Nerve's impression among the criminals has risen a notch, and everyone thinks that he has a lot. In an environment like a prison, the vast majority of people do not have a measure, they hope that they have a measure, they don't have the courage, and they admire it when they see others have a dose. This behavior of Liu Nerve has laid the foundation for himself to move towards "Shun".

After Liu Nerves gave the team leader a dismissal, the team leader treated him much better. said that it was much better, but the attitude towards him was upgraded to the same level as everyone else, but Liu Nerves didn't think so. He felt that it was not good to be like everyone else, what he wanted was courtesy and respect, and he performed the toothbrush scene again.

He grinds the toothbrush this time, and no longer grinds it with the team leader on his back, he grinds more slowly, a toothbrush is sharpened and sharpened, and his mouth often alternates between small and loud voices to people: "Lao Tzu is still uncomfortable, if you want to do it, you will die." "Who is he going to kill? He didn't name him, the person who suspected most that he was going to kill himself was the team leader himself, and those new criminals who usually got along with him on an equal footing were not afraid.

The team leader was scared. But he didn't report to the cadres again this time, he knew that the report would not have much effect, at most, the cadres would call Liu Nerve to reprimand him again, and after the reprimand, his danger would be even greater. He thought that he lived in the same cell with Liu Nerve, and that night, while everyone was asleep, Liu Nerves could use this toothbrush to end his life as soon as he couldn't figure it out.

Liu Nerve grinded the toothbrush short, and it couldn't be sharpened anymore, and if it was grinded again, it wouldn't work as it should. Liu Nerves exerted the "patience" he had gained from 20 years of training in the head board prison, the toothbrush was not sharpened, he took the sharpened toothbrush to play with whenever he was free, and deliberately often played in front of the team leader.

The team leader is a face-saving figure in the prison team. No matter how scared he was in his heart, how could he bow his head to Liu Nerve, but he was really not easy to deal with a character like Liu Nerve, he was worried and afraid, he had to relieve this fear, and in the end, he bowed his head to the new prisoner he managed for the first time, and he was determined to talk to Liu Nerve alone.

In the prison team, it is a very honorable thing to be called by the team leader to talk alone, and some prisoners compare the team leader to a "second cadre", and if they can become a person trusted by the team leader, their life in the prison team will become correspondingly relaxed.

On this day, the team leader called Liu Nerve to talk.