One question about my case remains unclear: who actually sued me.

Before the trial, I talked to the female lawyer three times, and she learned the real facts of the case from me, and I guessed from her the real informant.

I always thought that I was wronged, that I was falsely accused by someone, perhaps by Zhong Ning and Zhong Guoqing, who accused me of being imprisoned and "ashamed" of Xue, perhaps they had been planning this for a long time. I have always believed that the law will eventually justly clear my name and restore my reputation. But after a few conversations with the lawyer, I had a hunch that something was wrong.

The lawyer believes that: first, according to the relevant regulations, the 20,000 yuan may be recognized as a large kickback in nature; Secondly, the kickback was, in fact, taken by me and, in the terminology, "squandered" by me. The crux of the matter now is that, according to the provisions of the Anti-Corruption and Bribery Regulations, whether the receipt of kickbacks constitutes bribery mainly depends on two factors: first, whether the kickbacks are public; 2. Whether the rebate is recorded. If I received a kickback of 20,000 yuan, the matter was made public, and the head of the unit knew and agreed, and at the same time recorded it in the official accounting accounts of the unit. That does not constitute bribery, it is a legal kickback. On the first point, I confidently assured the lawyer that my receipt of the money must have been made public, and that it had been agreed by the two levels of leadership above me, Bian Xiaojun and Zhong Ning. In fact, I handed over the money at that time, and I handed it over to Bian Xiaojun the next day, because they didn't let me take it.

As for the second point, I was a little soft-mouthed, and the money was obviously not accounted for; I didn't go through the Guoning Company or the finance of the Taekwondo Gym Preparatory Office, so I was directly asked to take it without going through the accounts. I thought that Zhong Ning and Bian Xiaojun were the bosses and the other were superiors, and they asked me to take them, I didn't secretly take kickbacks and then damage the interests of the company to engage in tofu scum projects, I really never thought of using my position to accept bribes for personal gain. After listening to the lawyer, I realized that if the money had been handed over to the company's account first, and the boss agreed to let me take it and then take it out of the account for me, it would probably be fine.

In addition, the lawyer's understanding of the case file was even more serious than I had imagined, not only about whether or not to make the account unfavorable to me, but also whether to disclose it, I was also in danger. The lawyer told me that none of the evidence collected by the procuratorate could prove that I had handed over the money or reported it to my superiors. Judging from the supporting materials issued by Guoning Company, the company did not know that I had received this kickback at that time. In the confession of the boss of Longhua Company and when the accounts of Longhua Company were checked later, there were explanations and records that he had paid me this money.

Things are very clear, I think this is Guoning Company is going to kill me!

But I can't help it. Nothing but surprise, resentment, and dumbness left me with nothing but regret. I regret that I was so confused, careless, careless, and lacked common sense. I didn't want to take a bribe, I didn't realize it, but I couldn't get away with it. When I think about it, I had a flower feather on my head as a deputy chief engineer and thought that I really knew everything, and I thought that I could handle this complex society just after I entered the society from university. My self-confidence at that time was ridiculously blind, and now I realize that I am just a high-minded child with no social experience, and I don't know a lot of programs, just a hairless fool.

I'm completely familiar with what kind of character Zhong Ning is, she can do everything she wants, and whoever she hates is useless. She framed Anxin and could smash her job by any means, and now she can naturally commit crimes without hesitation to me. Not to mention her brother Zhong Guoqing, who can be mixed from a penniless car pulp seller into a wealthy man with a lot of money, doesn't he have a heart for ruthlessness!

My only hope can only be pinned on one person, and maybe only this person can prove my innocence. I gave the lawyer his name, I asked the lawyer to go to him, and I told the lawyer that my girlfriend Anxin also knew this person, and if I wanted to find him, I could ask Anxin to take her there.

This person is Liu Minghao.

The day before the trial, the lawyer came again. Every time she came, in addition to answering her questions and telling her about the process and details of the matter, I asked her more about peace of mind. From her, I know that Anxin is okay now, she is very anxious about my business, but she is still strong, she has given a lot of help to the lawyer, taking her or accompanying her to the witnesses she needs. She told the lawyer that the person she admired and feared the most was the lawyer. If the lawyer says that this thing is black, he will definitely be able to find evidence of blackness, and if he says that this thing is white, he will definitely be able to find a reason for whiteness. Maybe the impression left by Nande's two lawyers was too deep for Anxin, so that she deeply believed that the back of the lawyer's palms and hands, one against the other, could completely turn the past day over again!

When the lawyer met me for the last time before the trial, he told me that Anxin had quit her job at the Furniture City in order to help her collect evidence. This incident surprised and saddened me, the peace of mind of the situation I know, what did she eat without work? What does the child eat?

I asked the lawyer, "Does she still live in my house?" Didn't anyone blast her out? ”

The lawyer said, "Not yet, I met with her yesterday." ”

I bowed my head and was silent. Perhaps my bad luck came too quickly, so quickly that I still had trouble adapting to and accepting this reality, always suspecting that it was nothing more than a nightmare.

Although the lawyer is a woman, her professional habits and expertise give her a calmness and resourcefulness that even those of us men can hardly imitate. The things that made me aggrieved, angry, shocked, and speechless came out of her mouth, and they became objective, ordinary, transactional, and strange. She said: "Yang Rui, about the factual part of your case, we have talked about it almost, I came today, I just want to listen to your opinion one last time, tomorrow the court will begin, what do you want me to argue?" ”

How to argue? I didn't understand, I couldn't figure out what a lawyer meant. I said, "Didn't you say: 'Facts are the basis, the law is the criterion?' the facts are like this, you know all about it, and you know better than me how to apply the law." ”

The lawyer thought for a while, as if he didn't know what to say: "Yang Rui, you now have two choices, one is to admit that your behavior has committed the crime of accepting bribes, then the focus of my defense is that the process and specific background of your bribery are relatively special, and the circumstances should be determined to be relatively minor, and the purpose of this defense is to strive for a suspended sentence." According to your situation, the certainty of getting a suspended sentence is still relatively large, and you can come out as soon as you are sentenced to a suspended sentence. Do you want to figure it out? ”

I was stunned and said, "Of course." ”

The lawyer nodded, but there was no expression between her eyebrows, and there was no joy or sorrow in her face, which never smiled. She continued: "There is another way of arguing, which is to argue that you are not guilty, and if you succeed, you can completely clear this matter and go out with a clean slate." However, there is little certainty of not being guilty. Now only your buddy Liu Minghao promised to appear in court at that time to tell him about the situation at that time, proving that you said in advance that you would hand over the money to Bian Xiaojun, and you also talked to him afterwards that Zhong Ning and Bian Xiaojun agreed to leave the money to you. If the court had accepted his testimony, the kickback would have largely met the requirement of publicity. As for not paying the account, it is Zhong Ning and Bian Xiaojun's business, and you should not be responsible. However, this argument is a bit far-fetched, and it depends on whether the prosecution's evidence is strong or not, and whether there is anything new, so I dare not say that I am sure that we can win a verdict of not guilty. I argue that if you fail, the court will find you guilty, and if you are found guilty, I am afraid that you will not even be able to get a suspended sentence. Because the Supreme People's Court used to have a provision that those who refused to admit guilt should not be given suspended sentences. Once you are sentenced, you will literally have to spend a few years in prison. So, do you want me to defend my guilt and try my luck with a suspended sentence, you have to think through these two options, you have to have a clear opinion, and I can defend according to your opinion. We have unified our opinions, and we will have to cooperate in court tomorrow. ”

I was at a loss, my mind was a little messy, and I couldn't figure it out. I had to turn to a lawyer, a female lawyer who looked like a serious big sister who was probably not yet thirty years old, and now knew almost everything in my eyes.

I asked, "What if you plead guilty and get a suspended sentence?" ”

"Ninety percent," she said. ”

I asked again: "If you plead not guilty, how sure are you of finding not guilty?" ”

The lawyer did not answer immediately, as if he needed mental arithmetic, and was silent for a moment before he said, "Twenty percent." ”

I was silent, and when I looked up to see that the lawyer was still staring at me, the gaze falling on my heart like a weight, and I couldn't breathe.

"What do you say," I asked, "what do you say you should choose?" ”

"Each has its pros and cons."

The lawyer's answer was simple, crisp, and impeccable. I said sullenly, "Have you asked Anxin, what does she want?" ”

"I asked, I talked to her in detail yesterday, and I asked her for her opinion as your relative and friend. Should I ask her for advice? The lawyer asked rhetorically.

"Yes, she is my relative, she represents my relative, she represents my family. What did she say? ”

"She said, it's up to you to decide."

"Didn't she say anything tendentious?"

The lawyer thought for a moment and said, "No." Of course, she hopes that you can come out sooner, but she is afraid that you will confess your guilt and have no understanding in your heart, afraid that you will be unhappy for the rest of your life, afraid that you will be charged with this crime in the future, and your future will be affected for the rest of your life, and she is afraid that you will live in this shadow for the rest of your life. ”

The lawyer stopped, waiting for me to speak, but I kept my head down. The lawyer didn't rush me, as if she deliberately gave me time to think, and after a pause, she still spoke:

"In fact, even if you don't admit guilt and the court finds you guilty, your crime is still established, and it will follow you for the rest of your life and affect you for the rest of your life. I think it's the same. So, I think you might as well get a reprieve. ”

The lawyer finally spoke her tendencies, and she looked at me to see how I could bet on this Russian roulette-style game. I remember there was an old movie in the United States called "The Deer Hunter", and I had seen this disc before. It's about a couple of American prisoners who were forced by a group of Vietnamese soldiers to use a **** loaded with three bullets to put their heads on for Vietnamese soldiers to bet that six magazines loaded with three bullets hit their temples and hit with half the chance of life and death, and let you choose for yourself, it was too cruel, and I felt cruel when I looked at it! Now, I feel like the American GI with a gun to my head trembling before I pull the trigger.

The lawyer added: "This is just my personal opinion, and in the end it is up to you to decide." ”

I commanded myself to stop my futile thoughts, to stop trembling in my heart, I looked up at the lawyer, and I commanded myself to speak calmly. Even I don't know why I'm pretending to be so fearless and decisive at this time.

I said, "I want to be innocent!" ”

The lawyer looked at me for a long time, and she looked at me for a long time before she nodded. Not a word was said again.

The next day, the court convened as scheduled. It was a small case and not many people came to sit in on it, so I easily found peace of mind in the gallery as soon as I was escorted into the courtroom. She didn't sit too far forward, her eyes looking at me all the time. There was a subtle smile on her face that conveyed to me the warmth of that smile that only I knew, and I suddenly felt like my mother in that moment.

I didn't know the other observers, but they sat in groups of two, a bit like some university student volunteering to watch the trial.

Apart from a reassuring smile, I can barely recall the circumstances of that trial in its entirety to this day. I remember that Zhong Ning and Bian Xiaojun both went that day, and they went as witnesses rather than observers. When Zhong Ning came on the field, I looked at her calmly, my gaze was as calm as possible, but she was still an enemy who was very red-eyed, and her voice tone when she testified was still so gritted and unwilling to forgive. I know that Zhong Ning's personality, status, cultural accomplishment, and her age have not yet taught her to forgive.

I have the impression that the lawyer's performance that day was still okay, at least the eloquent posture made people believe that she basically did not drop the chain in terms of personal level. The core point of her defense was that the kickback I took was handed over to the company and then returned to me with the consent of the person in charge of the company, so it was already a reward for employees by the company in nature. I also followed her argument and stated to the court how I gave the money to Bian Xiaojun, how I told Zhong Ning about it, and how Bian Xiaojun and Zhong Ning replied to me. The prosecution's evidence seemed to be easy to refute my statement, first with Bian Xiaojun testifying with a blank face that he did not remember that I had given him a kickback of 20,000 yuan, and then Zhong Ning loudly denied that I had told her about it on the way to Nanjing. From the time Bian Xiaojun walked into the courtroom to testify to the time he walked out of the courtroom, his eyes always avoided looking at me, he only watched the judge and prosecutor talk, asked him to leave the courtroom and walked away with his head bowed and a few steps. Zhong Ning stared at me as soon as he entered the courtroom, and looked at me again after testifying, with a smug and vicious smile on his face. I still looked at her with a peaceful gaze, wanting her conscience to be held accountable in this peaceful gaze, but until she withdrew from the courtroom I did not see that she blushed the slightest bit about her conspiracy and perjury.

The lawyer's last resort to counter these perjuries was to announce in court the previous relationship between me and Zhong Ning, as well as the subsequent breakdown, and the reasons for the breakdown. This shows that as an alternate member of the Guoning family at that time, it is impossible for me to embezzle this small fortune of 20,000 yuan, and it is also to remind the court that Zhong Ning has the motive to set up a situation for revenge in this case. Announcing my previous relationship with Zhong Ning, and the process of falling out with Zhong Ning because I fell in love with someone else, was persuaded by the lawyer to agree. She believes that this is precisely the most critical fact in the relationship between the characters in this case, which can greatly reduce the credibility of Zhong Ning's testimony by the court, and may even disqualify her as a witness according to the principle of recusal.

The last witness that the lawyer took out was my buddy, my friend who I have known since childhood, and my old friend Liu Minghao.

I remember when Liu Minghao entered the courtroom, I smiled at him. I knew that Liu Minghao was a witness on my side, and after months of detention and long-term isolation from the outside world, I suddenly saw my old friends rushing to testify on my behalf, and I felt particularly sad and comforted. I can't help but sigh that friends are made since childhood, and only childhood friends become forever friends. I really want Liu Minghao to look at me, I really want him to see that I am smiling at him. But he, like Bian Xiaojun, didn't know whether intentionally or unintentionally, he avoided looking at me. He came out of the side door, with his head bowed, and walked straight to the witness stand, his face always tilted in the other direction, and I don't know who he was looking at. It wasn't until the presiding judge began to ask questions that I saw his somewhat nervous face and unnatural eyes, which I still remember vividly.

I remember that Liu Minghao on the witness stand had flashing eyes, slurred speech, a pale complexion, and stiff muscles. His response to the presiding judge's questions was almost sluggish. His voice and appearance also made me feel unfamiliar. I can't even remember how the presiding judge asked questions that day, and what he answered. The only few answers that still stick in my memory are: "...... No, he didn't say that he would hand it over to Bian Xiaojun when he put it away...... No, he didn't tell me about the company agreeing to him taking the money, and I don't remember him saying that. This is Liu Minghao's testimony! His testimony turned him de facto into a prosecution witness.

During the entire course of the trial that day, it was only at this moment, when Liu Minghao suddenly rebelled against the water and made the above testimony, that the lawyer was stupid.

Later, much later, I forgave Liu Minghao. The first place I settled down in after returning from the United States was still Liu Minghao's home. Before I left for Yunnan to find peace of mind, Liu Minghao also stuffed me with 20,000 yuan for me to be entangled, which was the same as the amount of the rebate at the beginning, not much at all, not a lot at all. Of course I didn't ask for the money.

I forgive Liu Minghao just because he is a businessman, and the principle of a businessman is to put interests first. I later learned that Zhong Ning and Zhong Guoqing somehow learned that Liu Minghao would become a crucial defense witness, so the day before the trial, that is, at the same time that I asked the lawyer to make a not-guilty defense, the head of the supply department of Guoning Group invited Liu Minghao to eat a meal of Tan's food at the Beijing Hotel. It is said that it was a big deal with a total target of more than 4 million yuan.

I was found guilty and sentenced to two years in prison. On the day the judgment was served, my lawyer appealed on my behalf to the Municipal Intermediate People's Court. A month later, the Municipal Intermediate Court issued a final judgment: rejecting the appeal, upholding the original verdict and not granting a suspended sentence.

After the final verdict and before I was sent to detention, my lawyer asked An Xin to come to the detention center to meet with me as a family member. When we met, I found that both of us deliberately made a relaxed demeanor and tone, trying to comfort each other, but in fact, each was more uncomfortable than the other. We all pretended to talk casually about things like our bodies, sleep, food, finding a job, and other painless things, as well as about how the bear's illness is doing now, and other sloppy topics, as for the future of me and Anxin, what to do in the future, these are the issues that I am most eager to know from her and most eager to communicate with each other, but no one said anything. Not only because the question was too acute for me to speak, but also because there was a policeman in the room who was supposed to be present at the time of our meeting, and the policeman and my lawyer were chatting on one side, and one ear was of course listening to our conversation.

The meeting lasted for ten minutes, and when it was almost over, An Xin suddenly took off the piece of jade Guanyin from her neck and handed it to me across the table, and our hands only took advantage of this opportunity to make contact for a moment. My hands are hot, and my hands are cold. She has always been cold hands and feet like this, and I have said many times that when I have money, I must take her to see a Chinese medicine doctor to regulate her qi and blood.

Our hands were held together, and we didn't dare to linger to feel each other's body temperature, then let go, and said with peace of mind: "Put it on, you know that I am always by your side, and I am bless you." ”

Although her hands were cold, the piece of Jade Guanyin that she was carrying was warm. The police saw our movements, suspected that we were handing over some secret and forbidden items, and immediately came over and intervened.

"Hey, what's going on?"

The police asked me, and the lawyer also came, and I spread out my unrecovered palm on the table, and on the white palm lay a piece of turquoise jade. The lawyer consulted the police in a half-pleading tone: "This should be fine, this is something to hang around the neck." ”

The policeman took the piece of jade and looked at it carefully, and there was a thin red rope dangling on the jade. The policeman said, "How much is this thing worth?" He was not allowed to bring anything valuable, and he had to be put away by the prison for safekeeping. ”

The police returned the jade Guanyin directly to the stunned Anxin, and said: "Don't give him such an expensive thing, if he goes inside and changes this for a cigarette and smokes, you won't be able to redeem it." ”

Then he didn't allow us to say anything more, looked at his watch, and said that the time for the meeting had come and it was time to end.

"Well, okay." Said the policeman.

I stood up in obedience and said, "Okay. ”

Anxin also stood up, and his eyes turned red all of a sudden.

I smiled at her, trying to make it easy to the end, I smiled and said, "Don't come back in the future, find a job first, and then, hurry up and remarry the bear!" ”

The reassuring "easy" front finally collapsed, and tears fell in strings as if pouring out. She didn't say a word, wiped her tears with the back of her hand holding Yu Guanyin, turned around and opened the door, and ran out without saying a word. I wanted to shed tears too, but I held back.

Two days later, I left the detention center and was transferred to Beijing Prison to serve a two-year sentence. Life in prison was boring and depressing, and in addition to studying and doing work every day, I continued to make almost futile appeals to balance my heart, support my spirit, and save face. Every day at sunrise and sunset, going to and from work, I am depressed and rarely happy. The cycle of life passed without any new ideas, and I often regretted that I didn't listen to the advice of my lawyer at the beginning, pleaded guilty and fought for probation to get out early, at least then I could continue to be with peace of mind. If she hadn't disliked me for being a sinner, we would have been able to continue to live together as before. Will Anxin dislike me?

Two years is a bit too long for me because anything can happen in those two years. Maybe when I walked out of the iron gate of the prison, Anxin had really already empathized with him, had already had a new life, and met a new wishful husband. Life changes every day, and there is absolutely no one who does not change the same life. Especially in the reassuring situation, without a job and with a child, the most important and urgent thing to consider in front of her is undoubtedly not love and loyalty, but the survival of reality, not for herself, but also for the child. So the words I said when I broke up with her about asking her to "remarry" as soon as possible, although it was not my intention, and even the thing I feared most in my heart, I must say it! This is not a joke, and I can't give peace of mind any psychological pressure to ask her to wait for me. What's more, even if I come out in the future, it will be difficult to find a very decent and white-collar job. Serious companies, serious enterprises and institutions, who would want a person who has a history of bribery and is released from prison? There is no doubt that I will be an untrusted thing for the rest of my life because of this crime!

Anxin is different from me, although she has the trauma of that period of life and has a child, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. She is still young and beautiful, she still looks like a simple virgin, and her appearance is still attractive to many men. And, more importantly, she has a good character, and her history, although complicated, is innocent. The word innocence now has a particularly precious meaning in my heart.

Anxin has not visited me in prison since. Later, my dad came once, didn't see me, and gave me some nutritional products and other things, as well as a few books, intellectual. He told me through the prison cadres that I should listen to the cadres' words well, reform well, pay attention to study, and be able to be a new person when I come out in the future, serve the people and the four modernizations.

My dad came to give me something, and remembered that he had such a son, which in itself touched me very much. It doesn't matter what he sends, it doesn't matter what he says, the important thing is that this incident tells me that I still have relatives in this world. Perhaps because Anxin suddenly disappeared at that time, and she did not reply when I wrote to her, I felt a very deep and painful fear of abandonment.

Much later, I learned that the day after Anxin had seen me for the last time in the detention center, he tied the child on his back and took the train back to Qingmian, Yunnan. Much later, I learned that she had returned to Qingmian, and as soon as she walked into her family's northern-style house, she fell down on her knees when she saw her surprised parents in that courtyard. She burst into tears and couldn't kneel down. She said to her parents, "Dad, Mom, help me, I'm going to save someone, he's so good to me, I love him, I have to repay him!" ”

Much later, I learned that Anxin's parents had sold almost all of their possessions, including their roof-heavy northern-style house. They have completely changed from a big family on the rich side to a poor person, not counting the cash of nearly 300,000 yuan they handed over to their daughter.