Sarah once said that she was a defective product.

Since she was born in this world, she has no emotion, a mutilated thing that resembles life but is not life.

Yes, in fact, it can also be said that she is just a "thing" that has been lucky enough to have self-knowledge, nothing more.

Maca didn't know how Sarah had seen the world over the years. But from the strangeness at the beginning to the familiarity later, it should not be much different from a child growing up.

At least, on a spiritual level, that's how it should be.

But it's hard to imagine how she thinks of herself......

"Wait!"

When Maca withdrew the energy of the Bewitching Monument back into the gem and cut off his mana supply to the rune array, he suddenly thought of a question and couldn't help but ask.

"Speaking of which, why do you want to get emotional?" He was a little puzzled, "If you have emotions and are just hiding them for some reason, I can understand a little, but ......"

"Reason?"

Sarah stood in the middle of the formation, silently thinking for a moment, then shook her head again.

"I don't know, I just think...... I want to have emotions," she said a little confused, "that's what I'm missing, what I don't have, isn't it...... Is it normal? ”

"Normal?" Maca looked at her and repeated the word.

"Isn't it?" Sarah stroked her cheek and said softly, "For example, when I think about Phillips, I should be sad...... But I didn't even understand what grief was. Even when I saw other people's crying, I didn't know what it was supposed to be like. ”

As she spoke, it was as if she felt the slap that Phillips had slapped her on the side of the face again, and the subtle touch made her unforgettable for the rest of her life.

"In this case, I'm going to want to really experience it – even if it's just for a moment."

However, at this moment, Maca's finger immediately pointed at Sarah.

"Yes, that's it!" He frowned and said, "I mentioned that earlier, right?" Emotions are the appearance of desire, and your desire for emotion itself, isn't this kind of thought a desire? ”

After pointing out the key, Maca reminisced as she continued, "You know, there was a time when I lost my emotions. At that time, my mindset changed a lot...... Seriously, if I hadn't had emotions, I might not even know what to do at that time! ”

Now that I think about it, that feeling is still terrible.

But Maca clearly remembers that she didn't even realize her fear at that time. There was only a sense of disobedience that secretly drove him, and he discovered through self-analysis that such a state was very likely to be bad.

That's why he began to imitate his past self as much as possible after understanding the current situation, and found a reason for himself to move on.

Otherwise, it would be difficult for him to imagine what he would be like now.

With that, he looked at Sarah again.

"And you," he analyzed, "you didn't have any past to refer to in the first place, so how did you find the motivation to move forward in this world?" ”

"Not to mention trying to get emotional." - Maca didn't say this, but the meaning he wanted to express had already been passed on to Sarah.

"Forward...... The power ......"

Sarah struggled to think with a puzzled expression, and Maca could tell that she was having a hard time understanding what was so close to the root of the matter.

In fact, if it were a normal person, it would be difficult to find an answer to this dialectical discussion.

But for Sarah, this is a key - if she can figure it out, then she may be a big step closer to the "emotion" she needs.

And as far as Maca's position is concerned, she actually wants to help Sarah as well. Because now, Sarah's harvest is completely linked to his study of the soul and the monument of bewitchment.

It's a pity that only this step is the only place where he can help.

"Oh, Sarah," Maca seemed to think of something as the other man pondered in silence, "I have one more question for you...... Probably this question will be a little easier to answer than the one just now. ”

"What?" Sarah lifted her eyelids slightly.

"I want to know how you understand your own existence?" "Like I know, I'm a 'human'...... This answer may not be accurate, but it is my perception of myself. ”

"Me?" Sarah thought for a moment and said, "I've thought about this question many times before, and I think ...... I should count as an 'item'...... Right? ”

Obviously, she was still very unsure of her answer, but it was no wonder.

"Really?" Maca nodded, "Then look at this-"

As he spoke, he pulled out a heavy book and tossed it at his feet. Then, as he swung his staff, the book immediately swelled.

It can be seen that under Maca's control, the book changes its shape rapidly. In the blink of an eye, it transforms from a book into a mass of colorful irregular substance, and constantly refining its outline.

Not long after, in the open space between the two, a girl who was almost indistinguishable from Sarah appeared.

"Look at her," Maka said, "what do you think is different from her other than the perception of self?" ”

It's actually like an ordinary person analyzing themselves in the mirror, but the sense of reality created by Transfiguration like Maca can't be compared to looking in the mirror.

In the previous Defence Against the Dark Arts class, Snape's Boggart training session had caused Sarah to encounter a similar situation. But now, when the self is examined purposefully, the effect is certainly much more significant.

While Sarah is drawn to the girl who looks exactly like herself, Maca is also carefully watching for all the changes in her, and this may be the perfect time for him to find a breakthrough.

However, if he could have known what happened to Sarah when she faced Boggart, maybe he wouldn't have had to be so troublesome......

"No ......"

Just for a moment, Sarah subconsciously took a half step back as if she felt something incomprehensible.

"I ...... I don't understand," she said, taking a deep breath and taking another half step back, as if trying to move away from something that looked so much like herself, "I think...... It's uncomfortable, I don't want to see her, can I get her away? ”

"Is that really the case?"

Maca nodded to herself, and then swung her staff again to turn the "doll" that resembled Sarah back into a book.

In fact, upon seeing Sarah's performance, he understood that Sarah didn't really seem to be emotionless. Because when she sees someone who seems to be the same as herself, she feels strange because of the subtle differences between the other person and herself.

And that strange feeling is undoubtedly a faint fear.

"Sarah," Maca couldn't help but smile after a moment's thought, "I have to congratulate you first. As it turned out, although the experiment failed, my conjecture seemed to be wrong...... Well, or rather, that's at least not quite quite. ”

He paused, then continued, "You may not be lacking in emotion, but you are ...... Your emotional changes are too weak compared to ordinary people. ”

"I have emotions?"

Sarah blinked, then lowered her eyes and looked at her hands, as if looking for a sense of reality. And Maca, seeing that she seemed to be confused and a little relieved, she was a little relieved in her heart.

After coming to this conclusion, Maca herself was actually a little disappointed.

Because he had thought that if Sarah really had no emotion, he might be able to take this opportunity to let Sarah confirm another conjecture for him.

And that speculation involves the source of the power of the Monument of Bewitchment.

That's right, he's decided to take on Rowena Ravenclaw's next test.

However, if his conjecture is confirmed, it will not be him who really holds the Monument of Bewitchment—but Sarah in front of him.

As for Maca himself, he will manage to be the only one who can contain Sarah, just as he did when he tried to control the alienated eight-eyed spider.

If Sarah could live in peace without doing what he wanted after gaining affection, then he would not interfere with anything in Sarah, and if not, he would have taken on his share of responsibility.

However, even Maca didn't think in advance that Sarah was actually a normal person with emotions.

It's just that her emotions are very weak.

“…… In this case, the Ravenclaw test had to be put on hold? Thinking about it like this, Maca, who was already somewhat hesitant about this matter, couldn't help but shake her head, "That's fine......"

"Professor McLean?"

Seeing that Maca seemed to be pondering something, Sarah waited for a short time before suddenly calling out to him.

"Oh," said Maca, who immediately regrouped her mood, "Anyway, that's all for today's attempt...... Actually, we've gained a lot, haven't we? ”

Through the little realization just now, Sarah has also felt some very subtle doubts. Under Maka's reminder, she summarized those doubts and made herself aware that they might really be the traces of her emotions.

"Yes," Sarah said, "thank you, Professor McLean. ”

When Maca heard this, she didn't say anything polite like "no thanks". He didn't gain as much as he expected, but that didn't mean there wasn't anything at all.

But......

"The Monument of Bewitchment...... Do you really want me to come by myself? ”