I don't know when it started, I gradually lost my self-confidence and began to have low self-esteem.

I still remember when I was very young, I was like ordinary children, I liked to make noise and jump until He Jiang was born.

My mother's preference and disregard made me more and more unable to find the position of the head of the family, and I watched my father, who had always loved me, also began to circle He Jiang, taking care of him, and my fiery heart gradually cooled down.

There is no place for me in the house, and I am like an outsider, not even as a guest.

My mother beat and scolded me indiscriminately, He Jiang blamed all the mistakes on me, and I began to feel less and less inclined to talk and communicate.

I finally went to college, but I didn't have enough tuition.

Watching the people around me spend money and buy things one by one, and I could only nibble on steamed buns and shrink in the corner with the old godmother, begging everyone to ignore my existence, so that I wouldn't see their disdainful and mocking eyes.

Since then...... The efforts of the poor turned into a joke......

I worked hard to earn money to supplement myself, or I got the family's medical bills for my younger brother and father, which became a sarcastic joke for other people's after-dinner entertainment.

As I walked through the academy, listening to the fingers and ridicule of others, the humble did not even dare to lift their heads.

"You see, that's He Chu in the first grade, I heard that the family is poor, and her mother collects waste for her to go to school."

"Won't it?"

"Really, really! She wore those two clothes back and forth, tsk, maybe they all stinked. Someone covered their noses and made a look of disgust.

"She's working in our school library now...... But she's busy, mopping the floor, sweeping the floor, and sorting out books, all of which she does by herself, and it seems like a thousand yuan a month. ”

"A thousand bucks? I'm laughing to death, what can I do with a thousand dollars? I'm more than a thousand dollars for a dress, okay? ”

"Yes, the key is that she is very arrogant, and she doesn't care if anyone talks to her."

"Hehe, this kind of person, she deserves to be poor! Poor to death, she got it! I've been a poor guy all my life! ”

I walked past them calmly, my fists clenched.

It's not that I'm not arrogant, it's that I don't know how to talk to them.

Because every time I tried to explain something, they would look at me with a look of great contempt and sarcasm and say the most nasty and disgusting things.

I just want to explain, my clothes are very few, but I will change them from time to time, it is hot in summer, and the clothes dry quickly, I finish washing today, and I will dry tomorrow, and the two clothes will be worn differently, and they will definitely not stink.

I also want to say that our family is not a waste collector, but my mother's money is not used for me.

But no one listened to these words.

The time seemed to be etched in my head, it was the second half of my freshman year, Christmas Eve.

It was very deserted in the library that day, with only a few people, and everyone went out for the holiday, which made me feel a lot more relaxed.

I swept the entire library without incident, and when I was halfway through the mop, I heard someone eating melon seeds.

I hurriedly went over to take a look and found that the other party had spit the melon seed skin directly to the ground.

I whispered, "Hello...... This classmate, may I ask...... Can you spit melon seed peels into the trash? The trash can is right at your feet...... Not far away. If...... If you don't want to spit in the trash, you can spit on the paper. ”

The girls looked at me contemptuously, "Why? Cleaning the library is your job, right? If there is garbage, you can sweep it, otherwise you just sit there and the school will give you money for nothing? ”

"That...... I don't mean anything else, please don't get me wrong, I just hope you can put the melon seed skin together...... Otherwise, if I vomit on the ground, not only will I not be able to sweep, but it will also affect other students......" I said cautiously.

Someone pushed me, and I didn't stand firmly, and sat on the ground with my buttocks, a little dazed.

"I repeat, it's your duty to clean. You didn't clean it up, why did you rely on me? If you're afraid of affecting other students, you just stand here, I'll spit out, you sweep it, isn't it? ”

With that, the people burst into laughter.

I bit my lip and wanted to get angry, but I didn't even know how to get angry.

My temper has long been smoothed out by my mother and my brother.

Those girls spit out a mouthful of melon seed skin, and I will sweep it.

I listened to their ridicule of me, and my heart was very aggrieved, and I couldn't stop crying.

In the end, a well-meaning classmate went to tell the teacher in the library, and the farce was stopped.

After that, I didn't work in school.

After graduating successfully, I joined a small company as a designer, and the company was not much better than the school, but I probably endured bullying for a few years, but I felt that it was unremarkable and let them do it.

At the most...... At most, it's just a little more work, and it's nothing, and there won't be a lack of meat.

Until Fu Yang's mother found me.

At that moment, I felt that I had worked hard for so many years and finally transferred, not to mention marrying a rich family, or someone I had a crush on for a long time.

In fact, sometimes I think that if I hadn't had such low self-esteem at the beginning, my mother hadn't been partial to my younger brother, and my psychology was healthy, I would have confessed to Fu Yang with confidence.

It's really not that I'm boasting, my looks are really good, and eighty percent of them can fall in love with Fu Yang at that time.

It's not like I was married to him for two years before I could see his true face.

But time doesn't turn back, and things don't go away when they happen.

During the days when I married Fu Yang, I was even living a frugal life, I quit all the servants in the family, hoping to save Fu Yang some money, but later I found out that people didn't need it at all.

It is probably the two years of indisputable life that have also allowed me to regain a little self-confidence, without the bullying of others, it is also very good to live a plain life.

Unexpectedly, I was divorced, and I was faced with the choice of marrying Fu Ruyan.

Looking at such an excellent Fu Ruyan, and so many suitors around me, I was at a loss all of a sudden.

So I desperately doubted him, I didn't trust him, I was afraid, I panicked, I was afraid that he would be snatched away by someone else.

At the moment when I saw Song Qian for the first time, the inferiority complex I had lost for a long time came back again.

I know that no matter what aspect I am, I am not worthy of Fu Ruyan.

Even if I marry him, I'm still an ordinary girl, I don't have strong work ability, I can't help him in business, and I don't have the knowledge of Song Qian.

I don't really have anything special about me other than this face, this body.

This is also the reason why, every time after the slightest movement in Fu Ruyan, I suspect that he doesn't love me.

Inferiority...... It's really scary.

It can ruin a person's life.