It turns out that the shelves are on the shelves like this, just say hello.

I thought it was going to be a complicated operation, and I studied it there for a long time.

And they're on the shelf, and they seem to have to write a testimonial or something!

I don't know how many people are still reading this book, but I'll write one.

Thank you to the friends who watched the pirated version, thank you very much to the brothers who are watching the genuine version, and especially thank the brothers who have rewarded them.

Not at all grateful to those guys who have laughed out loud when they read my books, but who have looked at them and walked away with their butts. What is the difference between this and those negative men who leave after the refresh and pull out the carving ruthlessly. I'm still laughing when I have a relationship, and I won't be given a hundred yuan.

Oh no, I'm still laughing when I read my book, and won't give me a dime.

It's not that I want you a hundred dollars, but I'm just playing with this old joke.

I'm not like those self-righteous authors who think of themselves as idols and readers as their own ATMs.

I didn't ask for your tickets or anything, nor did I show my hard work, and I didn't ask others to read the genuine version.

Because I'm a person who believes in fairness and freedom, you're happy to see me.

Well, without further ado. You know, it's time to pretend again.

……

"Bang la la la ......" A deafening applause rang out.

"Hello audience, welcome to the ......" The applause lasted for a long time.

"Eh, eh! The DJ next to him stopped the software that played applause, and the labor and management still had to speak. The applause finally stopped.

Host: "Hello to the audience and friends in front of the TV, and the few people in the audience who eat melons, welcome to watch today's large-scale variety show emotional program "We Have a Set". ”

"Although you may not have heard much of this show, you must have heard of me, I am the host who escorted Peking University, stupid you."

"My favorite singer is Li Yonghao, because he has a good song, if I can do it again, I want to choose Li Bai, and then I really chose Li Bai."

"Don't get me wrong, I didn't travel back to the Tang Dynasty to form a CP with Li Bai, nor did I find Li Bai's reincarnation, let alone play Glory of Kings, they just have the same name. Okay, that's all for introducing yourself. ”

"The purpose of our program is to show the talents of global talents, share the wisdom and joy of ordinary people, lead the trend of national variety shows, show the unique wonderful, and highlight the most simple emotional ......"

At this time, he said that he was a little impatient, why are there so many purposes of this show, he has to read it for a long time every time, and he wants to put up his middle finger.

"Our show often invites some celebrities and celebrities to participate in our show. For example, what Yang Kun and Zhang Xinxue, Xiao Shen Yang, mentally retarded and, and, and, and who do I rub? ”

He looked at the program list in his hand and said, "Oh, oh, I'm sorry, I read it wrong just now." ”

"It's not about whom, Zhishangli and is the name of a combination, and they have a very nice marshmallow song."

"In addition to inviting some outdated stars, we will also invite some ordinary people to our stage."

"Just like this ordinary person who came to the scene today, but ordinary is about to become a thing of the past, and hitting the street is synonymous with him. His work will be on the shelves at the starting point, and he himself will be a star of tomorrow. ”

"Next, we invite our guest today to make a shining appearance, let us welcome him with warm applause!"

Then he pointed to the side: "DJ! Put on the applause and music, this young man is going to have a magical dance. ”

"There are also people who eat melons invited by the audience, you can call it, don't call for a while, there will be no box lunch to eat."

"Whoa!" "Woohoo!" "Meow meow!" "Damn,!" "!"

Suddenly, the lights dimmed, and a disheveled Matt-killing nobleman appeared in the spotlight.

Seeing this, you were shocked and said, "Eh, don't shine the light on that person, move to another place." ”

"Security guard! How did you do it, how did you put the people who asked for food? ”

The young man said angrily: "Who do you say is asking for food? Don't see me cosplay? ”

"Ah, is that so?" Silly, you were a little embarrassed, and said embarrassedly, "I'm sorry." ”

"Your look is so sudden, I wasn't mentally prepared at all, I didn't recognize you."

This young man reluctantly said: "Do you want to drive people out if you don't recognize them?" Besides, what's wrong with my look? ”

"I warn you, we rural people, are not very good-tempered. If you don't understand art, don't make a few blind comments. ”

"Don't think that you are a rich, handsome, and beautiful host, I don't dare to beat you."

Silly, you sincerely apologized to him: "Yes, yes, it's too reckless, please Haihan." ”

"Alright, let's go back to what we just did. DJ！ Put the music on and the lights ready. ”

I saw Sao Nian carrying a broom and saying, "Hello everyone, I'm pretending to be a forced family." ”

Silly, you quickly hid to the side, lest this really hit him with a broom.

"Let me bring you a song, if I were a DJ, would you love me?"

Sao started a talent show, and he took a broom and scratched his head on the stage to make an awkward dance.

He also danced and sang: "If I were a DJ, would you love me?" Will you love me? ……”

He sings so eloquently, and his dancing posture is so devastating.

With the flashing of the spotlights, it really hurts my eyes.

Several melon-eating people in the audience all scolded when they saw it.

"Love you paralyzed, don't want the lunch box."

"Yes, I don't want to add chicken legs."

"I can't force myself to look at this kind of thing."

"I'm ashamed of why you're so good."

"His light is too strong, ah, my eyes!"

……

There weren't a few people in the first place, and now they all ran out.

The atmosphere at the scene was a little awkward, silly you hurried out to save the scene.

Sao Nian said dissatisfiedly: "Why don't these people know how to appreciate it at all? ”

"You have invited too many viewers to this show, why are there so few people?"

Silly, you explained: "You came too late, this show has been off the air for seven years, and the people have long run out." ”

"Oh? Is that the case? After hearing him say this, this Sao Nian's heart suddenly balanced.

It seems that it's not that he is not charismatic enough, but that he is too good, and this outdated show is no longer worthy of his grade.

Silly you asked, "You just said that your name is pretending to be a forced family, right?" Does our country have this surname? ”

Pretending to be a forced family: "Please, brother, this name is a pen name as soon as it sounds, okay, our country only has the surname Zhuang." ”

"Actually, my pen name last year was pretending to be a fake Chesky, and this year I changed it to pretending to be a coerc."

Silly, you asked again: "Then why do you call it a pretending house?" ”

Pretending to be a coerc: "Because my ideal is to become a big pretending home." ”

Silly you asked again: "Then why do you call it a fake Chesky?" ”

Pretending to be a homemaker: "Because I'm an old sky, I drive all the time." ”

Silly, you suddenly realized: "Then you must fasten your seat belt and be careful of overturning." ”

Pretending to be a coerc: "Thank you for reminding me, I'm a very safety-conscious person." ”

"Today is because I want to do this killer Matt hairstyle, so I didn't wear a hard hat."

Silly you sighed: "It's a pity that you didn't join the mentally retarded force back then, otherwise how could they be disbanded?" ”

The pretending family also felt the same way: "You are right, it was their loss that they didn't invite me at the beginning." ”

"But as I said in my book, if someone like me goes to the entertainment industry, who still looks at others?"

"I think the world needs to be fair, those who have strength use their strength, and those who don't have strength use their appearance."

"Everyone deserves the opportunity to show themselves so that it will be balanced."

Silly you: "Slow down, how do I feel that the point of your expression is not fairness." ”

"It's your handsomeness that breaks through the sky and your talent and strength that pretends to be unparalleled?"

The pretending family nodded and said, "Yes, it's good that you understand, so I don't have to emphasize it again." ”

"Anyway, that's what this sentence just meant, don't care about these details."??

"Understood." Silly you said, "Speaking of cosplay." ”

"Who are you looking like cosplay?"

Pretending to be a coerc: "Ask for food." ”

"Poof!"

Silly, you feel like you've been hurt internally.

He asked puzzledly, "Why do you want to pick and ask for food?" ”

Pretending to be a coerc: "Don't talk nonsense, I didn't pick shit." ”

"As for this look, didn't there be a wandering master who was very popular some time ago."

"As the so-called inspiration comes from life, who is not picking."

Silly, you admired it in your heart: "Oh! I see, taught. ”

The pretending family added: "It's not just me, you look at the platinum gods now, their inspiration also comes from life." ”

"In fact, they used to be ordinary people who lived an ordinary life, some sold three spoonfuls of sugar, some sold tomatoes, some sold pig blood red, some sold silkworms, some sold potatoes, some raised chickens, some raised cats, and some burned fires...... There are too many to mention. ”

"They are all looking for inspiration in life, and when their experience and inspiration accumulate to a certain extent, ideological sublimation occurs."

"And before I did the renovation, I was a sweeper. The most powerful thing in Shaolin Temple is not the abbot, but the sweeping monk, which is the so-called big hidden in the temple"

"Ouch my Maya!" Silly, you should quickly interrupt his tirade, otherwise it will really take three days and three nights to go on like this.

Silly, you wiped your sweat and said, "Can you pick the key points, let's not talk about other people's." ”

"Okay." The pretending man raised the broom: "Do you know why I need a broom?" ”

Silly, you don't want to blurt out on the conditioned reflex: "You stupid! ”

"What did you say stupidly?" Pretending to be a forced family glared angrily.

Silly you are startled: "Oh, no, no, no, I'm talking my name." ”

"As for the reason why you are holding a broom, are you imitating a sweeping monk?"

"Or are you imitating that, the broom star of the Seven Fairies?"

The pretending family exclaimed: "This is all guessed by you, you really have a set." ”

"It seems that you guys have a set of programs, and they really live up to their reputation!"

Silly, you said a little embarrassedly: "Your Excellency has won the prize, each other." ”

"It turns out that your rising star is a broom star, no wonder your hairstyle is so good."

"Same show, same show!" The pretending family explained: "I know that this is actually magic? ”

"The one who holds the broom doesn't have to be a sweeper, he may be a magician."

Silly you: "Oh oh! Listening to you, I should go and study for ten more years. ”

He thought to himself that if a person didn't study, he would become like this guy, a god-talker.

"You like cosplay, I can understand that, but why would you want to broom stars?"

Pretending to be a house: "Because I'm unlucky, I wrote for half a year before signing a contract." sent thousands of red envelopes to save some popularity, but they were swallowed by robots. ”

"I don't ask for any recommendations for my style. But I had been working for more than a month, with two chapters a day of no less than 3,000 words. Why didn't you give me that badge of honor for 30 days? ”

"My request is only so small, but it still has to go wrong, and I'm not even in the mood to update."

"The most hateful thing is that last month my left eyelid jumped every day, and I thought I was going to be lucky, but it turned out to be cramping."

He said with some frustration: "Don't they all say that the left eyelid jumps to make a fortune?" What are these eyelids peeling with me? ”

"Hamm, hahahahaha!" Silly you: "Forgive me for laughing unkindly, I understand your feelings." ”

"Can you persevere until today, do you have anything in your heart and want to tell you?"

Pretending to be a compulsor: "Yes, first of all, I would like to thank the starting point and the editor. ”

"Let me complete this shelf, which has been put on the shelves by the ancients and the future, neither ancient nor extinct today."

"Thank you to my mom and dad for giving birth to such a good and lovely me, and then I can say this nonsense."

"Thanks to the parents of the readers, they will come to read my books after giving birth to these excellent readers."

"Also, I saw a comment from a reader today that I don't look like a novice, so let me explain again that most of the manuscripts that are posted now are deposits. This book has been written since July 18, and it has been sent out since August. ”

"This year I added a half-crossing half-system start, and then finally signed a contract, but everyone who sees it knows it. I don't really like anything like the traversal system, so the content of this article has nothing to do with the traversal system or anything. ”

"Although this year is still miserable, I am a dead brain man in the next, oh no, I am a persevering person in the next, so I will continue to write. And I'm only going to write this one for the rest of my life, so it's time to exercise my brain. ”

Silly you are very sure and firmly and affirmatively said: "Yes, yes, yes, yes, the brain is a good thing, you deserve it." ”

The pretending family smiled: "You too, each other." When you read this book, you may think that I don't feel like I'm writing. ”

"Because I've never thought of writing this kind of thing before, but fortunately, I have ten years of experience in pretending, which can be regarded as ten years of grinding."

"As for why the background of this book is set in the two-forcing dimension, because the two-forcing dimension is commonly known as the pretending to be forced world, and 2B is ZB."

"Compared with the one, two, and three dimensions, the people in this dimension are a little abnormal, and they especially like to pretend and show."

"The second B dimension can be said to be the second dimension, but in fact, it is mainly a dimension for cosplay lovers. They are obviously three-dimensional people, but they like one, two, and three-dimensional things and lifestyles at the same time, but they focus more on two-dimensional. ”

"What I want to tell you here is that I hope you don't indulge in these things, and it doesn't matter to you how good the scenery in other dimensions is. Those unrealistic things can only be used as a pastime, and I hope that everyone can strive to have a good life. ”

Silly you: "Okay, we've already felt your heart. ”

"I hope you will make persistent efforts in the future and carry forward the spirit of brightness and cheapness."

Pretending to be home: "Okay, I wish everyone all smooth sailing and all their wishes come true in the future." ”

Silly you: "Uh-huh! Good times are always short-lived, and it's time to say goodbye again. ”

"There is no feast in the world that will not be dispersed, and today's program ends here, and we will have an indefinite meeting in the future."

Pretending to be a forced family: "I feel like I played well today, can you let me watch the effect of the show?" ”

Silly you: "That picture is too beautiful, you won't want to see it, go home and play with it." ”

"Damn! I'm going to see it. Pretending to be stubborn, he stubbornly walked towards the photographer's eldest brother.

"Oh my God! What kind of bullshit are you guys shooting? ”

Silly you: "I told you not to watch it, what a hard job." ”

The photographer explained: "We didn't mean to. ”

"It's like this when it's filmed, it's a natural state without PS."

The pretending family was furious: "It's really unreasonable." ”

"I don't even PS, and I dare to say that you didn't mean it!"

??“ I don't want to get mixed up with this show! ”

Silly you: "That's right, this show has long been off the air." ”

Pretending to be a forced family: "I'll fuck you, top your lungs!" ”

Silly you: "Who's that, security." ”

"Now you can take this one away."

。 vertex