Just when I was in despair, I saw a painting.

The painting was plastered on a ruined wall in the midst of the ruins.

I recognized the remnant wall, the blackboard on the remnant wall, which the two of us used when we first met and chatted.

I recognized the painting, the person in the painting, so striking in the ruins.

It's her!

She has been waiting for me.

At this moment, out of the remnants of that year, a little boy came out, holding a picture that had not yet been painted, and looked at me very vigilantly.

Then, one after another, children appeared, also holding a painting in their hands.

Finally, she came out.

She saw me.

The two of us, staring at each other.

There are only a thousand tears.

The two of us finally came together.

We got married.

I didn't learn sign language, and the two of us still used a pen to communicate and a tree branch to talk.

Although there is no sound and no laughter, I think that this silent communication is a communication of the heart and a silent happiness.

Although life is a little hard, we are very satisfied.

We didn't have children of our own, but we adopted a dozen orphans, and she taught them to draw, and I taught them to read.

As the children grew up, they all left us.

I thought that we had gone through so many hardships and that we could grow old and work together for the rest of our lives, but fate played tricks on people, and without any warning, her ear disease recurred.

It turned out that she was not born deaf and mute, but she was born with a loss of voice, when she was three years old, an acute ear disease robbed her of hearing, so that she could no longer hear any sound, unexpectedly, old age, ear disease will entangle her again.

Every time she had an ear attack, the pain in her ears was unbearable and unspeakable.

But in that poor era, let alone seeing a doctor, even three meals a day was a problem.

Later, the ear disease became more and more intense, and the pain reached her brain, and her whole head began to ache, and every time she held her head, she was trembling all over, sweat soaked all her clothes, and her teeth creaked.

Seeing her in such pain, but I couldn't help it.

I'm incompetent, I can't do anything.

I wanted to bear that pain instead of her.

I'm guilty, I'm incompetent, I'm incompetent, I can't help her.

I could only hold her tightly and never leave her.

Until one day, she had an ear attack, she couldn't bear it anymore, bit her finger, and wrote three words on my palm with blood, killing me, and I was immediately frightened.

I knew she couldn't hear it, but I still yelled at her, I didn't allow her to do this, I didn't allow her to give up on herself like this, I didn't want her to die, I couldn't bear her, I couldn't do without her, I needed her.

Then, for a long time, she did not talk about it again, but I found that her ear attacks were becoming more and more frequent, and she was in more pain than before, and even she began to bite her tongue, and each time her mouth was full of blood.

I gradually realized that I was too selfish.

Because I was reluctant to leave her, because I was selfish, I only thought about my own feelings, so that she suffered so much, but I did not share anything for her.

Until one day, she picked up the brush again, took out the drawing paper, looked in the mirror, endured the pain, and painted a portrait of herself.

Painted one painting after another, when I was young, when I was old.

But as she painted, she cried.

She said that she was reluctant to me, she was afraid that one day she would not be able to hold on and suddenly leave this world, leaving me alone, how to live.

She wants to paint a lot of self-portraits for me, and when she leaves, let these portraits stay with me.

Finally she asked me to sit in the sun and wanted to paint a portrait of me.

She told me that after so many years together, she still hasn't painted a portrait of me, and she feels that she owes me a lot, and this painting should be regarded as making up for me.

But after painting my portrait, she cherished it and put it away, saying that when she left, she would burn this painting to her and let her take it to the underworld, even if she was reincarnated in the next life, she would take it with her at all times.

I couldn't hold back any longer, and hugged her and cried bitterly.

She was tormented by injuries, but she kept thinking about me in her heart, even if she died, she was still worried about how I would live alone.

I figured it out.

Finally I told her that I knew what I had to do.

She understood what I meant, and tears welled up in her eyes.

She said that in her life, the greatest happiness is to meet me, she has no regrets, she will leave happily and happily.

Finally, when she had an ear attack, I held her tightly in my arms, shouted her name, and killed her with my own hands with tears in my eyes.

She didn't lie to me, she lay in my arms and left this world with a smile.

But I didn't expect that what I had done would cause me great pain.

Overnight, I became a murderer.

No one understands what I'm doing, no one agrees with what I'm doing.

They don't see the affection between us, they don't see the pain of my wife, they don't see our desperate moments, they just see me killing my wife.

I've been accused of everything.

Everyone regarded me as a murderer with no humanity, and even the children in the village would hide away when they saw me.

I finally couldn't stand the accusations of my fellow villagers, and coupled with my nostalgia for my wife, I chose to commit suicide.

I chose to leave this desperate world.

So, I killed my wife, and then, I killed myself.

That's my story.

In the end, Chen Jinghong's grandfather sighed and said:

"Master Xu told me that because I committed suicide and my life span was not exhausted, I couldn't enter the underworld to be reincarnated, but when my ghost life was exhausted, I never wanted to be reincarnated again.

In this life, I'm sorry for her, I don't want to be reincarnated, I know, after drinking Meng Po soup, in this life, everything will be forgotten, but I don't want to do this, I can't forget her, I want to keep her in my heart forever. ”

After listening to the story of Chen Jinghong's grandfather, I don't know what I feel in my heart.

Actually, I can understand what Chen Jinghong's grandfather did.

We are all accustomed to standing on the moral high ground to look at others and things, but we ignore that we are just spectators, but we do not know what kind of pain the authorities are in.

Of course, I also know that what Grandpa Chen Jinghong said to me before, dust to dust, dust to dust, anything in the world, after a long time, will be looked down on, this sentence is obviously not Chen Jinghong's grandfather's sincerity.

Some things, some people, once they are emotional and their feelings are deep, even after 10,000 years, they will not be looked down upon, but will become deeper and deeper.

(End of chapter)