Rainy night

The pouring rain washed everything mercilessly, and the girl with a paper umbrella walked slowly down the street, surrounded by hurried passers-by, each of whom quickly passed by without the slightest stop.

She looked up at the white rain curtain in a daze, and cold tears slid down her cheeks, accompanied by dripping raindrops, hitting the shallow water on the street, flowing into the unknown distance.

She didn't know why her heart hurt so much, and she recalled the picture of the young man running happily in the rain with the girl in his arms, and her heart was like a blocked stream, dull.

Maybe this is the love he once said to himself that people can not be afraid of life and death, the affection between them is like a fire that will not be extinguished, and it is not a rainstorm that can be extinguished at all.

And he is just the figure who hides in the shadows and waits, and he will always have the qualification to wait and see.

"Oh, by the way, I forgot that you are a fierce and ruthless monster of the deep sea, and you don't know what love is." She tightened the white navy suit that had been draped over her, the worn-out marks on it were like her heart now, and when the sour liquid in it drained up, all that was left was an endless void.

She looked at the neon signs flashing in the rain in front of her, standing across the street, but couldn't keep moving. She stood on the street corner, the relentless rain continued to be accompanied by the thunder that streaked across the sky, and the night sky was pitch black, not even the slightest moonlight could be seen, as if there was only darkness and cold.

The rain was piling up up and spilled down her ankles, and she stood at the corner of the street on her clogs. Because all she could do was to accompany him silently, like a shadow that would always follow him, walking alone in his footsteps, and he never looked back, did not look at his existence.

It's okay this way, at least I can follow him until the end of my life. The girl often comforts herself like this, as if following is the only thing she can do as an emotionless monster.

She slowly closed her eyes with an umbrella, and what appeared in front of her was the face that was desperate before she died, and he said loudly and hard to himself: "Love is the kind of thing that makes people crazy, something that makes you desperate to be with her." I desperately wanted to survive, just to watch the sunset with the girl I loved. However, I said yes, but I didn't do it. ”

It was a parting word when I met him for the first time, and now it was just the only thing I missed about him.

Jiqi You're right, love is the kind of thing that makes people crazy, things that make you desperate to want to be with him. And now I finally understand the true meaning of what you said at that time, so I promised from the moment of enlightenment to be your shadow, I will not break my word like you, and I will definitely do it.

Perhaps, this is the love you are talking about.

Tears slowly oozed from the corners of her eyes, with bitterness and sadness. She feebly let go of her grip on the handle, and the fragile paper umbrella drifted away in the wind, shattered like dead leaves by the violent rainstorm.

Rain, endless rain slid down her cheeks, soaking her whole body like flowing water. She didn't know why her heart was so heartbroken at the moment, as if she had been stabbed with an invisible knife.

Especially when she saw the pair of intimate figures standing at the door of the movie theater, she had fantasized countless times that she herself was the happy girl. Happy enough to stand by his side without any scruples, happy enough to enjoy such a warm embrace, happy enough to accompany him into this hotel and hold the couple's final ceremony.

But everything is destined to be her fantasy, and there is no possibility of realizing it.

She still remembered the last time the fool took his shipwit to sea and met Yamato, she thought that she would witness the death of this fool again, but no, at the last second, the former king of her, who had terrified countless admirals, showed a soft heart, chose his men to show mercy, and brought him back to the palace that Carmel had built for her.

Although she hadn't been there, she could imagine the sweetness of him and Yamato, which made this seemingly ruthless girl show her weak side. Because in the end she saw Yamato with a smile, without the coldness and violence of the past, just a gentle maiden, holding the hand of a fool, and walking out of that castle.

At that moment, she thought about her reunion with him, and thought that she might be as happy as Yamato in the future, but she hesitated and stood still and didn't dare to take a step.

She knew that she was the culprit who destroyed her town guard at that time, and she was the one who gave him a painful death, but Yamato had done nothing to hurt him. Naturally, they can be happily together, but he, the murderer, the deep sea he calls a monster, is not qualified to stand in front of him.

Maybe this is like what humans often call lucky, Yamato is the lucky one she envies, and she is just a depraved deep-sea ship lady who is riddled with tragic misfortune, what right does she have to expect God's favor?

Although she didn't know what her former Admiral was like, she still remembered the endless rainstorm, the coward who would only curl up and cry bitterly at the end, unlike the boy who had died under his own knife, and did not give up until the last moment of his life. But he didn't give him a chance to start over, and gave him death without hesitation.

Although she always told herself that it was Yamato's order, she just listened helplessly, and it wasn't her Atago who was wrong. But she knew that she was the last person to carry the knife, and she was the one who killed the people, and the blood-stained military uniform she wore was the best evidence.

She looked up at the sky and smiled helplessly, her delicate face only as sad as rain. She opened her eyes and looked at the small windows with lights on the opposite side, and although she didn't know what room he lived in with the happy girl, she could feel the happiness overflowing from them.

Just like a burning bonfire, everyone sitting around can feel the warmth brought by the firelight, but standing in the darkness where the fire does not shine, she can only look at the bright light and longing for the warmth that she has not felt.

She couldn't step closer, she couldn't reach out and touch. Because the fire she yearns for is a warm light for the ship's mother, and for her, a monster born from the deep sea, it is a deadly poison.

There must be no emotion in the deep sea, this is what Yamato used to say to himself before, but now she has become a ship girl, and she is still the deep sea that can only hide in a dark and damp place.

She sighed and stood on the corner, standing upright like a puppet that couldn't smile, while her eyes were as sad as rain staring into the distance she had hoped. Until the rain stopped, until dawn, until her clothes dried, until she saw the figure appear again. She stiffened her steps and continued to follow like a shadow. The cycle repeats itself, as if it is just going back and forth in a circle with no forks in the road.

She stood in the morning sun, staring blankly at Jiqi's back. The empty eyes flickered little by little, and the cold expression on her face slowly melted, and she grinned slowly and hard, like a lonely rain-soaked scarecrow, stiff and wooden.

Sorry for being late, sorry guys.