Text/Sheng Qiu

The first time I saw Weixia was on the day of the ** Festival.

That day, Jingqi and I planned to go to his house to make dinner with him to celebrate our first ** festival, and then I saw her, it was sunset, she was holding a little rabbit and squatting on the sofa in front of the window, next to a glass of milk that was no longer hot, a large red sunset sun spread unscrupulously on her, quiet and beautiful, she turned her head like a white rose blooming in this empty room.

Jing Qi was a little surprised, turned his head and said to me that it was his sister-in-law who was studying in Shanghai, named Bai Weixia.

Bai Weixia smiled politely at me, a dimple shallow on her cheek, and she spoke to Jingqi, her tone was steady and without twists and turns: "I broke up with him, just this morning." "I sighed secretly in my heart, it's a pity to break up on the ** festival. I looked at her, and to my surprise she was not at all like the lovelorn girl I had seen before, her eyes were so calm, as if she was just telling a message about her friend.

With my sister-in-law Bai Weixia, the dinner was not sweet, they were silent with each other, and the atmosphere was frozen like a milk cake that could not flow, sticky to the point of dullness.

After dinner, Jing Qi and I went downstairs for a walk.

"Why, your brows are locked so tightly?" Holding hands with each other, but there was no warmth in the hands, I stared blankly at the fingers and shook my head.

Jingqi looked at me and said, "I feel sorry for my aunt. He paused, and then said, "She's only a little older than me, you don't know, that boy is my aunt's high school classmate, and for him, my aunt studied hard, so she went to the same university as him today." Now that they have graduated, I thought that such a precious relationship should be able to go on. ”

Precious? I laughed in my heart, in this era, what is not based on interests and games?

I didn't dare to say this, so I had to pretend to be naïve and ask him: "What about us?" Isn't it also precious? Jing Qi finally relaxed his brows, he hugged me, I could feel the smile on the corner of his lips, and he said, "Weiwei, of course we are also very precious." ”

That ** festival passed like this, and as for Bai Weixia, it was gradually forgotten by me until I saw her again.

I went to the bar with my friends that day, and the proprietress Miki was a good friend of mine, and she saw me coming, and said to me, there is a new bartender in the past few days, and he looks pretty good, so let me take a closer look at this person's craftsmanship. It's rare to see her boast so much, no matter how I say it, I have to buy her a face, about the same time, Miki poked me and said, it's her turn, that's it.

I leaned on the edge of the bar, a soothing music slowly spread out in the air, the singer's unique voice, lazy and charming, it seemed that people would be immersed in the cold water, but they were deeply fascinated by the rhythm of the pool.

Looking through the dim light of the bar, the bartender had her sleeves tied high, her hair neatly tied up on the top, but her forehead seemed to hang down two strands unintentionally, her back to me, her fingers flying between the various wine bottles, she couldn't see her appearance clearly, but her intuition told me that this woman would be beautiful. As soon as the song ended, the bar lights began to turn on, and the person came into my sight little by little, from blurry to clear, slowly outlining her face, and I recognized her, the quiet white rose.

"We know." Miki was visibly taken aback at the moment I spoke, and Bai Weixia smiled softly at me as I had seen her for the first time. There were no waves, just a faint dimple on the cheek.

I sat her down and asked her how she came out to bartend. She lowered her head and drank the boiled water in the cup, and slowed down for a while before saying, don't tell Jingqi. I looked at her lowered head, two strands of mischievous hair swept by, and there was an indescribable tenderness on her smooth forehead, which melted between her low head.

She said that she had quit her previous job, but she always had to support herself, bartending was a former hobby, she said that someone used to like to watch her bartending, and the mandatory memories related to that person can turn him into memories as soon as possible, she said that she doesn't like to forget, such beautiful things, since you can't have them, then they will live forever in the memory.

When she said these words, I kept staring at the hand holding the glass, slender, clean, its owner's appearance was gentle as the moon, but it also had a determination and intelligence that ordinary people did not have, she knew how to make herself better, and she also knew how to bury her sorrow so that others could live well. How could she be so calm, how could she not see sorrow in her eyes. She is a white rose, she has her fragrance, it's not that no one can see it, she can't see it, she will say that she is ruthless, she can see it, and she only says how lonely the person who wraps this fragrance has what kind of lonely blood and bones.

White roses don't stunning, so I didn't think about her anymore.

The next time I saw her, it was at the convenience store downstairs from her house. She tightened her thin coat, held black chocolate in her hand, opened a corner and was slowly eating, white rose black chocolate, I don't think this combination is too lonely.

I stood on the edge of the stairs, standing quietly beside me, she didn't have the intensity of designer perfume, nor the decadence of tobacco, just the lingering remnants of lemon soap. The streets are quiet at night, the trees are rarely chirping in spring, the magnolia spreads a soft color in the moonlight, and the fragrance travels along the road, everything seems so timeless.

The woman called Bai Weixia, she is not beautiful, she is beautiful, she is by my side and makes me feel comfortable, she is a white rose.

"I want to break up with your nephew." I say. This is true, I think about it and come and go, but I accept his feelings because Jingqi is very loyal to me, this is not love.

She didn't answer, and after a while asked rhetorically, "Do you like someone else?" ”

"It's not." I said, with a smile on her lips, "Whatever you want." ”

"Okay." I watched her figure walk away, gradually melting into the darkness, and I did not realize at that time that this white rose was so clean, so clean that even the darkness fell in love with her immaculate face and smile.

I won't forget, I made an appointment to go to dinner with Jingqi, and by the way, I arrived at my destination early, but I didn't see her arrival for a long time, and after waiting for half an hour, a familiar number appeared on my phone.

"How long have you kept me waiting, you know?" Jing Qi didn't speak, and my words were out.

I heard his voice on the other end of the phone hoarse, weak and grief, and he said, "Thinking, my aunt has been in a car accident."

It all came too suddenly. I was stuck in a blank space, why I pressed the end button, maybe I couldn't believe it, maybe I didn't want to believe it.

The white rose, I can imagine, was now as red as I had seen her for the first time, with pure white petals.

Is the Grim Reaper jealous? Or are the angels eager to meet you?

Later, I asked Jingqi where she was buried, and in the warm March sun, I placed a bouquet of white roses in front of her grave, and the photo showed her still smiling, with a dimple on her lips.

White roses have always been so beautiful.

A month later, I ended my love affair with Jing Qi, and he didn't accept it like his aunt, who thought that he had given so much to me that I shouldn't abandon him. But love is like this, you never have the right to blame the other party for not paying as much as you, because from the beginning, you paid voluntarily.

There are still all kinds of men and women around me, but they never last long, and I will forget about them in this fast-paced life, and no one will come into my heart.

Except, of course, the white rose.

I would think of her in the middle of the night, the first time I saw her, her quiet face in the sunset, her playful forehead when she was sideways to bart, the fingers she held the glass, the residual smell of soap on her body, the tenderness of her glance when she looked down, the chocolates she bought, the last beautiful back she left me.

When I can't sleep, I drink a glass of boiled water and remember her, she once said that such beautiful things, since you can't have them, will live forever in my memories.

It's the same with me now, I remember the few memories I have with her over and over again, and I never get tired of it.

Sometimes I ask, did she anticipate such a day?

I'm thinking about her again, my white rose.

What you can't get is never precious.

－Theend－