"You look like you know ...... them"

"Ah...... yes......"

"Huh...... Then I slept ......."

"Hmmm......"

I didn't know how to dispel her worries by looking at her exhausted appearance, but I knew that this girl would analyze the situation on her own, and in a way, she was much better than me. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

I leaned against the wall and thought about the way I felt when I faced the world, whether I was scared or whether I was simply looking for relief, wanting to find a peaceful place to return.

Maybe......

I'm just a very fragile person, I've never thought about this before, maybe I've never had the opportunity to think about it, I used to forget to think because I was tired in the constant bumps or fights, and now I forgot my own voice because of the voices of others around me.

Yes, if you pay too much attention to the gaze of others, you will gradually forget your own feelings.

Thinking that he didn't even know what was going on when he killed a person from the beginning, he now opened his eyes and swung a knife at a monster he had never met, what happened to him, he didn't know it anymore.

People will become, they will change because of their surroundings.

Of course, it's not so much the environment as the society, from the steel city where I lived in the past, to the barbaric society now, what I have experienced, what I have been thinking, what have I made myself like this.

But is this really the right thing to do?

In order to live, you can die and kill people wantonly, in order to live, you can eat people without shame, and in order to live, you can despise morality and give up ethics.

Just to survive?

Survive and keep doing this......

I looked out the window at the former high-rise buildings that were now only as gray as ruins, and the collapse that could be seen from time to time and the simple shacks that were rebuilt on top of the collapsed buildings, I felt a different kind of desolation in comparison.

In the distance, the ruins could still be seen faintly beside the lake, or rather, it was just a huge crater.

"Hehe......"

Even I wanted to laugh a little bit.

But......

If this is the future.

Is this the future I have always believed in and envisioned?

For a moment I didn't seem to know what to say, just leaning against the cold wall, feeling the chill brought to me by the cold wall, as if this would make my bumpy mind feel at peace.

Once upon a time, I could still hear that.

Whenever I look up at the stars, I always feel small.

But the more you feel the insignificance of life, the more intense the ** that changes all this.

Not just imagine, but devote your whole life to this goal.

Whatever your obstacle is, whatever you see along the way.

What's behind...... I can't seem to remember anymore.

No...... I guess I don't have the courage.

It's just that......

Never mind......

Maybe a long time ago, I could still hear that loud laughter.

But when exactly was that.

In the end, you can only force yourself to smile.

Speaking of which, how long has it been since I've lied?

I guess I can't remember.

Life without answers, just losing day by day.

Nothing has changed, and nothing has ever changed.

It's just that I feel more and more about what is in front of me by myself.

……

It's a nasty feeling.

……

But if you want to break him, it's good if you talk about it.

You have to carry everything you have, and pick up what is in front of you.

How much am I going to give up......

Maybe it's how many people have to betray to ......

However, even this is not necessarily successful.

The faint light is still shining through the world like a lamp that does not stop, but whether he can illuminate my future path, I don't know, what I know is that I am still too weak, so weak that I don't even know what I do, what to do......

Looking back and thinking about it slowly, remember that this time, if it was just a mercenary group giving a mission, it would have been to collect some money.

But what is my purpose?

In general, it seems that the mercenary group doesn't matter or anything, but what if I'm wandering alone in the wilderness? There are no police, no real estate bureaus, no people can control me, but why would I stay in a place where such a company is not murdering me?

Is it safe?

It doesn't seem like it's safe even here.

For a loved one?

I glanced at the little girl who seemed to be still asleep, and her sleeping appearance was so sweet that it was enviable.

However......

What is my beloved?

Stuff? Someone?

But......

If none of these results are true, what is the point of me staying in this place?

Confusion seems to be a kind of disagreement in the fundamental sense.

Of course, more of a disagreement.

Even the world before me is just as meaningless, and all those uncomfortable things are there.

Wait a minute...... Significance...... Something uncomfortable......

Past......

It feels like this kind of thing, there seems to be an inexplicable connection.

Contact...... It should be something related to the profession.

But the profession ......

I patted my head hard, but I really couldn't remember anything.

Wrong...... Wrong......

This thing seems to really have a connection to the present.

Slowly......

Think about what you do.

Afterward......

I sat on the ground and looked at the tattered floor, but I didn't think anything about it......

Even from one's own birth......

Then when I was in middle school, I was a very poor learner......

I dropped out of high school......

Then the mother got sick, remember before that......

I scratched my hair hard.

I seem to have found a job, probably as a sales clerk for a certain company.

Then the mother got sick...... I haven't been to work for a long time and spent all my savings......

At last......

Maybe I really thought of some unpleasant facts, but I still thought hard when I bit it.

Then the mother died...... Companies don't ...... themselves

The house was sold before that......

And then...... And then......

And then it's over? Wrong...... I should have a memory after that......

A memory......

Right...... Men in Black...... Mecha ...... Organization...... Leader......

"Ahh......h

And then I really found that I really couldn't think of anything other than that.

In the end, I could only read it silently.

"Men in Black...... Soldier...... Organization...... Leader ......"

Together, do the men in black worship their leaders like an organization?

Is this the Nazi Party?

I shook my head abruptly and waved away the vague thought, as he had deciphered the four words from different interfaces.

However......

Everything seems to be a mystery.