My name is Lu Xintian, I was born and raised in Wudribo, this is a beautiful place, there are grasslands, there are antelopes, there are beautiful lakes.

I remember when I was a child, there were many people here, it was a village of about 100 people, grandparents, uncles and aunts, neighbors, we lived here, very happy.

I remember my grandmother telling me that it was a paradise, a gift from God so that we could survive the most terrible adversity.

My father, he is a person who yearns for the outside world, he said that no matter how beautiful Woodribo is, it is just a prison, although I didn't understand the meaning of his words at that time, he would always hold me and tell me how wonderful the outside world is, I have always been curious about what my father said about what they are, such as telegraphs, such as magic, such as fireworks, too much, too much, everything I am curious about.

My father was a teacher at Woodribault, and I was fifteen years old.

I often saw my father throw down the pen and paper in his hand, and then leave us in class and go to discuss something with the adults in the village.

They sharpened their knives and made spears, and their eyes were so sharp that I was a little scared at that time.

At that time, I didn't know that my fathers, who seemed to live happily here, had been living in the beautiful prison of Woodribeau for decades, and although they were used to it, they could never adapt to it.

I asked my mother, "Dad, are they going to do it, are they going to kill people?"

Mom said they weren't there to kill, they were going to kill the monsters outside of Woodribeaugh.

Will it be dangerous, I asked? My mother is a "wise" woman, and at that time she said something that I couldn't understand, "Your father is just too paranoid, many people in the village have been waiting to move for too long, they can't see their own way clearly, they can't see the future, let them go out and fight, if they suffer a little injury, they will immediately retreat, and Woodribeau will be quiet, and this place will be peaceful and beautiful forever." ”

Mom was wrong.

Because the paranoia of her father and the people in the village is beyond the imagination and speculation of her and most people, it is human nature, people will be afraid and will die, but people are bloody when they are bloody.

It was the dawn of the day, and my mother and I, along with all the women and children in the village, stood at the entrance of the village, watching my father and them leave.

They came in groups and killed the little monsters blocking the doorway, and their faces were full of excitement that I had never seen before, and I later learned that it was the emotion that normal people would have after successfully taking the first step.

Then they went farther and farther and deeper.

We stood at the entrance of the village and waited for I don't know how long we waited, but Dad and they never came back.

I will never forget the pitch-black woods in front of the entrance to the village, the black hole that eats people.

Finally one day, my dad came back.

Yes, he was the only one, all the uncles and uncles in the village, the young men were all dead, and he was the only one.

He looked dejected, as if he had been greatly frightened, and at the same time scared me, because he was covered in blood and juice.

When he came back, he was crazy and stupid.

Sitting on the wheat field all day looking at the distance of the island, looking at the dazzling sun, shedding tears, his eyes were gradually blinded by the scorching sun.

The aunts of the whole village began to hate my father.

They thought it was just a simple temptation, but what they didn't get in exchange was the total annihilation.

Their husbands are dead, but my father is the only one alive.

During that time, my mother endured unparalleled swearing, and my father was demented, no matter how vicious the angry cries weed.

There were only women left in the village, and of course, men, Arthur and Yara, friends as old as I was, and an old grandfather with Alzheimer's, and we became the last survivors of Woodribeaught.

It is terrible for women to live together, and I don't know when the road has been, there will always be people in the village who say this:

If there is no man, it still won't work. The first person said something like this, and then an indelible mark was left on people's subconscious.

This sentence seems to have a magical power, so that the women of the village will sigh when they are doing something, and even if they don't say it, they will think of it in their hearts.

After a few years, the widows began to accept the reality and they began to deliver all sorts of things to my doorstep.

At first, my mother greeted her with a smile, but later, the smile on my mother's face was gone.

Because she would always take me to play somewhere else on the island every morning or evening, I asked my mother why she didn't stay at home.

Mom said that there were guests at home.

One day I couldn't resist sneaking back home.

What I saw was my numb and sluggish father, letting naked women in front of him, around, shaking, swaying, and entangled.

My sluggish father saw me peeking out the door and smirked at me, and I admit that at that moment, I was really frightened.

As I grew up, I slowly learned that my father was having sex with those widows every day, endlessly having sex, making me feel disgusting sex.

I don't know how he died, but I know that his grave was dug up by someone on the island one day, and his bones seem to have been thrown into the sea, and I don't understand whether I want my father to embrace the sea and be reborn, or just spurn my father.

Time passed in a hurry, and the beautiful Woodribeau was like a beautiful poisonous curse, and we were like a group of primitive trapped beasts.

More and more people are dying, some because of illness, some because of one reason or another, I just remember that my mother was depressed, she was paralyzed all day and she was working in the fields one day, and suddenly the other women didn't know who led the way and started scolding her, and then it resonated with people, a frenzied scolding, and then someone began to throw stones at her, but she didn't resist, she didn't move, and then I don't know whose big stone Lu Dao was, and smashed her to death.

I admit that I secretly saw that scene, and I wanted to kill them to vent my anger, but I was so scared, aggrieved, angry, and hateful, that I couldn't sleep every day.

The woman who stoned my mother to death died of illness within a few days, and I was happy, but angry, because it wasn't her big rock that killed my mother, but everyone's stone, the big stone of Woodribeaugh.

Mother-in-law and aunts began to soothe me, comfort me, and take care of me.

They will always say: Xintian, you are a good boy, Woodribeau is only us, we can't go on like this, we have to live well.

Later, Arthur and Yara grew up, and I hated Yara because he always liked to eat stupid grass, and maybe because he ate too much, he looked stupid.

There were fewer and fewer people in the village, and eventually there were only a dozen of us left.

Woodribeau is still so beautiful, and those of us who are alive are still so sad.

The demented old man still sat motionless on the mat every day, but we knew that we would never go back.

As I grew up, maybe because my body became plump, the annoying Arthur and Yara would always blatantly watch me take a shower, and I couldn't get rid of it, and I hated it, and at the same time I was terrified in my heart, because I was afraid that I would not know what to do.

I would secretly read my father's books every day, those books about the outside world, and oh my God, it said that the skin of the women outside was very white and smooth, and if I put my hand on it, it would automatically slide down, and I would touch my face and imagine it, and then smirk.

I could see the sea on the edge of Woodribeau Island, but I had never seen a boat, and how I wished that an imaginary ship would one day come here and pick me up.

The ship must be magnificent, beautiful, mysterious, magnificent, and must be riding on the clouds and fog with colorful auspicious clouds.

The happiest thing I do every day is lying on the mat and imagining the world outside, and sometimes I stretch out my hands, as if I can touch and embrace those things I imagine.

Arthur and Yara are held up by the rest of the group, Arthur is called King Arthur by his mother-in-law, and Arthur's mother begins to push her two sons onto the "throne" of Woodribeaugh, which has only a dozen or so people.

Everyone else was accustomed to it and acquiesced, and the strength and skill that Arthur and Yara showed as men made everyone start to intensify their fanatical worship.

There are no men, and it really doesn't work, but now, finally the two boys in the past have grown into men.

But I think they have overlooked one thing, and that is that, in fact, over the years, we women have not been accustomed to the hardest work, even without men, and we have not survived.

Arthur violated me, I will always remember that I was walking on the hillside when he suddenly rushed out and pressed me to the ground, I already knew that there was such a day, but I did not expect it to be so rough, so disgusting, when he came into my body, my mind was full of dead mothers, dead fathers, and scenes of fathers and women promiscuous.

I feel so disgusting, I want to throw up, it's such a disgusting thing to have sex.

Arthur and Yala were the rulers of the island, and they both took turns violating me and the other women, and I gradually began to get used to it, to this twisted painful, disgusting thing.

I began to hate myself, and I began to yearn more and more for the world outside, imagining the boat.

Finally, my life has a new meaning, my daughter was born, I don't know if it is Arthur or Yala's daughter, she is my whole world.

I would hold her, like my father held me, and tell her how magnificent the world outside was.

The daughter asked, "Mom, what is ice cream?"

I was stunned and giggled out, it was something that could be eaten.

The daughter asked again: What taste, is it bitter?

I thought about it for a moment and said, "It must taste better than that damn clover."