Ignoring Xu Rong's cranky thoughts in her room for the time being, let's switch the camera to Li Xian's body, after breaking the mirror and not seeing his handsome self, Li Xian's slow emotions finally calmed down again.

I saw him cover his face, bend down, squat on the ground and began to sobb in a low voice, and whispered while sobbing: My good brother, I'm sorry for you, I'm sorry for you in my previous life, I still have to be sorry for you again in this life, some mistakes really can't be made, as long as there is a beginning, you can only make mistakes again and again, I hope you don't blame me.

I don't know how long I cried, Li Xian may have been tired of crying, so he stood up and lay down on a small bed in the study, but even though he was very tired, Li Xian was still sleepy, and his mind was always the picture of Zhang Mingliang when he was killed by himself in his previous life.

Whenever Zhang Mingliang looked at him in disbelief and incomprehension before he died, his emotions would be extremely unstable and he would fall into deep self-blame.

The reason why I killed my savior and good brother in my previous life was because my inferiority complex and jealousy had been suppressed for a long time and could not be vented, and finally made a crazy move.

I've been smart and excellent since I was a child, but because I'm the child of migrant workers, I feel inferior to these Kyoto children since I was sensible.

Even if his grades are better than them, and his appearance is more handsome than them, he still can't find any sense of superiority in front of them.

This feeling was not particularly prominent in primary school, because most of the children of migrant workers in the primary school I attended were children.

But because his studies were too good, he was finally admitted to a well-known middle school, and it was from that time that his inferiority complex was unprecedentedly magnified, and a child who did not belong to this city that everyone yearned for entered a school composed of children from Kyoto, and that inferiority complex became even more serious.

I have been more mature since I was careful and intellectual, and I also know that my state is not right, but that strong self-esteem is constantly warning myself that "I am inferior to others and do not belong here".

At this time, two people came into their own lives, one was his good brother Zhang Mingming, and the other was Sun Lijuan, the most beautiful girl in the class.

The two of them in the class were the first to take the initiative to talk to themselves, and they felt very comfortable in their interactions, and they did not feel the inferiority complex of talking to others.

Slowly, the three of them became good friends, because when they reached the age of the beginning of love, they naturally fell in love with Xu Lijuan, who had always been lively and cheerful, in their usual interactions.

But at this time, his best brother Zhang Mingliang secretly told himself that he might have fallen in love with Sun Lijuan, and secretly wrote a love letter to Sun Lijuan, but he never dared to give it to her.

When I heard such news, my brain fell directly into a state of downtime, on the one hand, my only good brother in this school, and on the other hand, the girl I had a crush on, and I fell into a dilemma.

The final result is self-evident, and his inferiority complex, which had gradually disappeared because of his relationship with the two of them, has been reactivated again, and it is more serious than before.

I couldn't help but think, what qualifications do I have to pursue Sun Lijuan, who is as beautiful as a flower? Is your family rich or powerful? Nothing, not even a Kyoto hukou, what do you have besides a good skin and a good grade?

Once a person's mental pressure is too great and he can't bear it, many times in order to transfer his mental pressure, he will naturally find an object to vent his pressure, so of course he locks this object on Zhang Mingming's body.

Because Zhang Mingliang once again stimulated his inferiority complex, and he fell in love with the same girl as himself.

Since then, the friendship between Zhang Mingliang and himself has appeared a crack in his heart, and whenever he sees Zhang Mingliang and Sun Lijuan sitting together and chatting for a while, his heart is extremely uncomfortable.

However, with self-knowledge, he still decided to give up his feelings, but how can this kind of thing be said to be able to let go, the more he suppresses the love in his heart, the stronger the admiration for Sun Lijuan becomes.

The most painful thing for me is that I have to pretend to be nothing to study and talk with the two of them every day, but what makes me more relieved and happy is that Zhang Mingliang did not pursue Sun Lijuan like other stormy butterflies, even if the written love letter has not dared to hand it over to Sun Lijuan.

Zhang Mingliang is just like himself, suppressing the thoughts in his heart in the depths of his heart, maybe he has the same inferiority complex as himself in his heart, and feels that he is not worthy of Sun Lijuan, it is no wonder that he and he can become the best brothers, everyone thinks about the same, and they are people with a common language and character.

Even so, whenever I see Zhang Mingliang and Sun Lijuan together, I still have that indescribable feeling in my heart, anger, inferiority, and even a trace of joy, because I feel that although I can't arch Sun Lijuan's fresh cabbage, it is much better to at least let my good brother arch than to let other pigs arch.

I have been tormented by such emotions, and this mood has been maintained until the second year of high school, which has finally been relieved.

Because of the division of subjects, she separated herself from Zhang Mingliang and Sun Lijuan, Sun Lijuan chose science, while she and Zhang Mingliang studied liberal arts, some people say that time and distance are the two best ways to spend a relationship, but it has no effect on yourself.

Although I can't be in the same class with Sun Lijuan because of the division of subjects, I still love Sun Lijuan like that in my heart, and because of my long-term admiration, I have an obsession with her in my heart.

I only like Sun Lijuan, and I don't care about other people at all, even because of my handsome looks and very good grades, many girls in the school have sent countless love letters to me openly and secretly, and I don't bother to take a look at it at all.

And what makes me incomprehensible and a little sad is that his good brother Zhang Mingliang doesn't seem to be as interested in Sun Lijuan now as he was in junior high school, and seems to have plans to give up Sun Lijuan, which can't help but make him have a kind of resentment towards him.

I often think in my heart, I gave up confessing to Sun Lijuan for you, but you are like this, how can you be worthy of my dedication to you.

It was because of such complex emotions that the rift between himself and Zhang Mingliang was deepened again.

Two years have passed quickly, and his grades are still among the best in the class and even the whole school, although his best friend Zhang Mingming's grades are also good, but there is still a lot of difference compared to himself.

The third time I deepened the rift between myself and Zhang Mingliang was after the college entrance examination, because I made a mistake in the exam, I was expected to reach the score line of Kyoto University according to my usual grades, but when the final list was released, I was only more than 30 points more than Zhang Mingliang.

Although the college entrance examination has been implemented many years ago, the university's admission score line for each province is still adapted to local conditions, and the result is that although he has more than 30 points more than Zhang Mingming, he still does not get into his dream school: Kyoto University, and his good friend Zhang Mingliang was admitted according to his lower score than his own.

As I grow older, I have become more sensible, and I have a deeper understanding of the injustice in this society, and I also understand that this is not to blame Zhang Mingming, and his negative emotions again and again are his own reasons, but he just can't control it and blames him.

Who made him the person with whom he had the closest relationship, if he was just a passer-by and did not have any intersection with himself, even if he was admitted to Kyoto University with just a score of more than 400 points, after hearing it, he would say at most, it was too dark, and then there would be no more.

But now such an example is in front of him, and it happened to his closest friend, how can he calm down.

At that time, my heart was full of anger, grievances, complaints, and other negative emotions about the injustice of the world, and on the day of the release, I was drunk alone, and directly blocked my best friend Zhang Mingliang, whether it was a QQ number, WeChat or a phone number.

He already planned to never have any more contact with Zhang Mingliang from now on, but everything is impermanent, and creation makes people, who would have thought that the damn end of the world would explode when he made up his mind to pay attention and was ready to return to a university in his hometown, and from then on he fled from the imperial capital, which was his sad place, and said goodbye to his past.

The most ironic thing is that ten years after the end of the world, when he was besieged by many monsters alone, and when he was about to end his life, he was saved by his good brother Zhang Mingming, who had both love and hate.