I poked at the door, Yan Hua was very happy to see it, got up to greet him, and Lin Xu also stood up, but did not move.

"Why didn't you see fat when you came home for the New Year?" I laughed with Yan Hua, but my eyes were always on Lin Su. Normally, after greeting Yan Hua, I would definitely have to chat with Lin Xu, but I haven't figured out how to speak, so I hope that Yan Hua will be more talkative at this moment and say more.

Yan Hua sighed, "Listening to my mother's chatter every day, I am also hesitant in my heart, I can't eat, sleep and sleep well, where to get fat!" She tugged at the clothes on her body, and then smiled: "The key is that I haven't lost weight like this!" ”

She dragged me inside, my steps were sluggish, and she dragged her to continue asking, "Are you really determined?" ”

Yan Hua glanced at Lin Su, "Lin Su was also talking to me just now, go over and say." ”

No way.

Yan Hua arranged me by Lin Xu's side, and then took the teapot to the waiter to refill the water. Lin Su and I glanced at each other, and both smiled politely, politely and unfamiliarly, and no one spoke. Lin Su is a little thinner than more than a month ago, she is not fat in the first place, this thinness looks less moisturized, thin hair, and the feeling of stretching between her eyebrows is also tired.

Yan Hua came back and sat on the main seat, pulled the snacks and melon seeds presented by the restaurant in front of us, and said with emotion: "Seriously, I have been in Beijing for almost ten years, and I am very reluctant!" ”

"It's been ten years?" I took over and said, "Oh yes, you went to college in Beijing, too." ”

"That's right." She twisted a peanut and threw it into her mouth, chewing it as she said: "Now that I think about it, the moment I received the university acceptance letter was really the highlight of my life, I was excited, my parents were happy, and my relatives and friends came to congratulate me." My parents felt that there was no way out of painting, but when I was admitted, I really felt proud. ”

"Parents, they can only start from their own life experience." Lin Xu said.

"Yes, I was 10,000 unconvinced. What about now? It's not like it's gray and sloppy again. Yan Hua spread his hands, "I really tried my best, but unfortunately my ability is limited and I can't take root." ”

"And what are you going to do when you go back?"

"We have a job vacancy in the propaganda mouth, and my dad helped me contact him, although it is not established, it should be quite stable. I went back to prepare for the interview, and it wasn't a big problem. She continued to twist the peanuts and put them in her mouth one by one, "I came back from the big city anyway, and I looked at my resume and thought it was okay." That job is barely related to my major. That's it, what else can I do? ”

Lin Su's hand patted her arm, "The most uncomfortable thing is hesitation, it's good to make up your mind about everything, there is nothing absolutely good and bad, right and wrong." ”

This seemed to be said to Yan Hua's heart, and she nodded together with her hands, "That's right!" I go home every year, and I am talked about by my mother every year. I talked to my friends in my hometown during the Chinese New Year this year, and my friends said to me: If you are really determined to stay in Beijing, in fact, you will not be upset, you just know that it is good to go home, you are just unwilling. ”

I gave a thumbs up, "It's not bad to stop the loss in time, and you won't be able to go back in a few years." The development of your hometown is also very good now, and the opportunities are not necessarily less than here. ”

"Well, after making up my mind, I felt alive at once." Yan Hua dusted his hands and raised his teacup to the two of us, "Alas, I don't know what year and month we will see you again today!" ”

The two of us also raised the teacups, and the cups touched together, not the sound of broken dreams, but just reality.

The people who asked for a meeting with Yan Hua arrived one after another, but there were not many, except for a few people in our group at that time, and there were two or three girls who were good with her on the administration and customer service side.

I deliberately didn't drive because Yan Hua clearly said that he wanted to drink.

As the saying goes, no banquet is made without wine, and this time it is practice, and it is indeed necessary to drink some wine. The atmosphere of the banquet was cheerful and lively, and a group of people took turns to talk about Yan Hua's interesting stories in the company in the past few years, recalling her amazing singing voice at the annual meeting, recalling the fierce battle with a certain project in a certain year, and also recalling our own related to Yan Hua.

Chengmei is still the same, but Yan Hua and I are gone, and there are more people who are preparing new plans and preparing for a new life in the new year. We all said that when Yanhua came back, we must bring our handsome husband and lovely children, but we all know that goodbye is far away.

I wasn't drunk, but I was a little dizzy, and I got up in my chair and went to the bathroom. When I came out of the bathroom, Lin Su was standing at the door waiting for me.

I sighed.

She drank well, she was not drunk at this time, and she looked at me with clear eyes.

"No need." I waved my hand, "No need to apologize, I received what you sent, I'm not mad at you." ”

"Sumi." She stood in front of me and suddenly bent down and bowed to me. I was startled and dodged against the wall next to me, "What are you doing?" ”

"I'm sorry."

Her voice trembled a little.

I sighed again and reached out to pull her up. Her eyes were red and she had tears in her eyes, "I'm sorry. I was so selfish that day, I didn't expect things to turn out like that, really. ”

"I know. No one could have thought of it, okay. I patted her on the shoulder, "It's over." ”

I wanted to leave, but Lin Su pulled me back, "Sumi, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry." It's that I'm too cowardly, and I don't know how I became so cowardly. I didn't dare to rebel against my boss at work, I didn't dare to rebel against my husband at home, I was afraid of losing my job, and I was even more afraid of losing my children. It's my cowardice that caused you to suffer so much hurt and grievance, I'm really sorry. She lowered her head again, "I regret it. ”

I looked at the thin and almost dry forest in front of me, and I felt incredible, even a little strange.

When I went to Chengmei for an interview, she sat next to the design director at the time. I remember very well that she was wearing a goose-yellow suit blouse that day, with flat shoulders and a straight back, and her chestnut shoulder-length hair permed with soft waves, and she bowed slightly when she saw me, and her smile was as gentle as a spring breeze in April, and I understood for the first time what it was like to be 'like a spring breeze'. She lifted her hand to pin one of her hair behind her ear, revealing the small, delicate earrings on her earlobe.

I thought at the time, this woman has such a good temperament and looks so beautiful.

But in the past three years, what kind of life has Lin Su experienced, and how did it become like this now? So tired and humble.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you so skinny? "I took Lin Su's hand, the fingers were knuckled, and the wrist looked like a layer of skin wrapped around the bones, thin.

"It's fine."

I probably drank a little bit of wine, and I felt a little irritated when I heard her say 'it's okay', "Didn't you just reflect on yourself for being cowardly?" I'm afraid of my boss at work, I'm afraid of my husband when I go home, I'm not your boss, I'm not your husband, what are you afraid of? Tell me anything. ”

She looked up at me and smiled wryly, "What else can I do, what's the use of saying it." ”

I pursed my lips vigorously and took a deep breath, "How are you and your husband doing?" ”

"It's okay." She said.

"Really?" I stared at her, "So what are you afraid of him doing?" ”

"I'm not afraid of him." She accentuated the word 'he', "I'm afraid...... I'm afraid ......" she gasped a little heavily, but finally retreated into a soft sigh, "The matter of marriage is not clear in a few words. ”

She sorted out her emotions and turned back to the previous topic, "Sumi, I apologize to you for not asking you to forgive me......", I raised my palm and interrupted her, "I said, that incident has passed, and I don't want to mention it again, I don't want to remember it again." The fault of that incident is Cao Hui, the fault is Cheng Liren, the reason why I blame you is because I treat you as a friend and blame you for being unkind. ”

"I'm sorry." Once again, she apologized.

"No, not really. You sent me something and wrote a letter, and I spent the night wondering if I should continue to be angry with you. Speaking of this, I felt a little more open in my heart, so I smiled, "And then I realized that anger is anger, and it is an emotion. When I wonder if I'm angry, I'm not angry at all. ”

"Really?" She put her fingers under her nose and inhaled gently, looking at me as if surprised, "You're not angry with me anymore?" ”

I shook my head.

"Cao Hui has left Beijing, and I have also left Chengmei, I will not see Cao Hui again or Cheng Liren again, but if I continue to be angry with you, that incident is equivalent to not being able to get over it. I don't know if that counts as forgiveness, I just want to seal it away and never think about it again. ”

She nodded, but the tears that hadn't fallen just now fell, "Thank you, thank you." ”

"Tsk, don't cry." I ran back to the bathroom and drew tissues for her. Wiping away tears, she said, "I'm so selfish, I'm really afraid of losing my job, and I regret it." ”

"You be strong, it's okay, even if the job is gone, you can find it again, don't be so pessimistic."

"I'm in my thirties, and now being an account director may be my career ceiling, and I may not be able to do this position anymore without Chengmei, I can't fight for young people."

"I understand. I'm getting ready to find a job right now. ”

"We're different." She shook her head, "I can't live without a job or without an income, not for a day." At that time, you always said that I was too tired to balance my family and career, and my husband at home obviously had a very high income, so why should I work so hard. But do you know why I'm fighting so hard? ”

I looked at her and didn't speak.

"Because I don't know how long my marriage will last."

A guest came over next to her, Lin Su stopped, lowered her head to calm her emotions, and waited for the person to walk over before she continued: "Su Mi, don't be afraid of your jokes, my husband may have someone else outside." So...... If he divorces me one day and I have no income, I am doomed to lose my daughter. Do you understand? I'm not afraid of my husband, I'm afraid of losing my daughter, I'm really scared. ”

"I understand." My hand clutched tightly on my phone, which contained the photos I had taken in Bali. I'm still hesitant to tell her.

"I was very nervous before I came today, and I didn't know how to face you. Thank you so much for those words you have said to me, and this is what has made me happiest these days. Lin Su threw away the tissue in his hand, went back to the bathroom to wash his face, and when he came out, he looked much better, but his eyes were red, "Okay, let's go back to the private room." ”

I stood still, tangled and nervous.

"What's wrong?" She asked me.

I took a breath and tried to speak, but when I hesitated, the words I wanted to say were held in my heart along with the breath. Lin Su looked at me inexplicably, and I didn't hold it back anymore before I became overwhelmed and said, "I have something I want to tell you." When the flower spoke, it also brought out a heavy sigh.