On September 8, 2020, I accompanied my mother to the hospital for a physical examination, the process was very slow, in addition to waiting is waiting, just waiting for the cold call, I also took advantage of this time to take a good rest, the herbal tea in the hospital tasted really bitter, but it was still very comfortable to drink in the stomach, smelling the steaming tea, my thoughts gradually drifted away, remembering the summer of 17 years.

Jiaying blacked me Soon after, I like to eat alone, away from the hustle and bustle of the crowd, this day at noon I ordered a meat sauce ramen at school and sat in the position to eat quietly, still thinking about the picture of Jiaying blocking me 2 weeks ago, I couldn't help but bury my head deeper, and eat quietly.

Well? What's the sound ahead? I looked up at the front, and found that there was a row of girls looking at me, pushing and shoving, I don't know why, then suddenly a girl trotted over, sat opposite me, and said to me shyly: "Can I add your WeChat?" ”

I was stunned for a moment, a little embarrassed, in fact, I wanted to accept it, but I still have the shadow of Jiaying in my heart, I can't live with one person in my heart, and there is another person on my mouth, so I had to politely refuse her: "No need, thank you." ”

And she seemed to be shocked, probably not expecting to be rejected, she asked puzzledly, "Why?" I couldn't explain more, and I replied, "No, why." Then she walked away, confused.

I'm sorry for hurting her courage, but I have to, and I think that's the best answer for her.

"Please B059 come to window 1", the emotionless electronic synthesized sound sounded, I pulled my mother over to draw blood, and after the accident, I went out of the hospital with my mother, I touched my hair and smiled at my mother: "Mom, I want to do some hair." "My mother said a few words to me and agreed to let me go.

There was a lot of traffic on the street, and I got on a bus and sat down, and I liked to lean my head against the window and look out the window at the fleeting scenery.

Even after all this time, I still have something to look forward to!

Ha! Secretly scolding myself, I plugged in my headphones and started listening to the song, I don't know when I started, maybe before I met her or after she left me, I developed this problem.

People who like to listen to music in the car may not think about the joy of arriving at the destination, but about enjoying the journey, because that destination is a place that they have long been familiar with, a place where they can guess the ending, no matter how many times they have been there, it is still the same! It's like liking someone, knowing that you can't be with her, taking the wrong car, but you're fascinated by the scenery along the way, even if it's not where you want to go, even if it's a dead end, after she gets out of the car, you're left alone in the car, because your destination is not this, you just enjoy such a journey with her.

I couldn't help but turn up my voice a little bit, just wanting to enjoy the scenery along the way.

The barbershop was on the second floor, and I carefully chose a hairstyle, and I thought it was okay, so I finalized it. Every hairstyle for me is a gamble, but I haven't won it yet.

The guy who helped me wash my hair was a guy in his 20s, I liked his hairstyle very much, but unfortunately I couldn't do it with limited budget, and I guess the school didn't allow it, so I started to help me apply dye after simply washing my hair, it smelled stinky but very comfortable.

"Are you still studying?" He asked me with a smile, and I replied, "I'm about to go to college." ”

"Do you have a girlfriend?" He quipped.

I was a little bitter, saliva lingered in my throat for a long time, and I said helplessly: "No..."

"Haha, it's okay, you're so handsome, there must be girls in the university who like it."

I smiled bitterly, even if I had, it would be difficult for me to be as attentive to her as I was to Jiaying, it was really unfair to her, I smiled: "Just praise me." ”

"Haha."

After washing my hair, the hairstylist styled my hair with clips, looking at me in the mirror to add a bit of maturity and stability, I couldn't help but sigh that I really wasn't the boy in the pavilion period, and she was not a sweet girl who was deceived and confused by a few words.

I thought about it for a long time, my appearance was just an accident, under the pavilion of which 17 years, I was 18 years old at that time, she was only more than 17 years old, it was a very confused period of love, my arrival added a hazy color to her heart, but I didn't grasp the opportunity, I don't know how to like her, how to love her, she likes someone else is not that I am not good enough, a person and another will inevitably have feelings after a long time, and I and she have only known each other for a day, only under which gazebo, If I say that he left a touch of color in her heart, then he left a rainbow in her heart, and she said that she didn't like me, and I could understand it, because I knew that my color had been covered by him.

She! Can not see.

"Well, it's okay, pretty boy, please come with me to wash your hair." The little brother of the barber said.

"Okay."

"Your hair is quite thick."

"Thank you."

I really enjoyed washing my hair, the claws were very comfortable, the shampoo was very fragrant, I looked at myself in front of the mirror and thought to myself, "If I had so much hair when I was dating her, maybe she would touch it, haha." ”

After washing my hair, the barber began to cut my hair, and I thought about my future plans, she was in this city, the city is very big, but I met her, but in terms of location, the area of this city is very small, but I will never see her again.

Thinking about these six months of getting along, I feel like a dream, the first five months I lived in a honey pot, the next month I lived in hell, life is bitter and sweet, but in these six months I didn't get anything, but hurt myself, she never knew how much I liked her, she never knew how much I cared about her, because she was not really loved, and I lost the motivation to persevere.

I remembered a quote.

If the ending is a comedy, you can cry as much as you want me to cry during the process, happiness can come slowly, as long as she is real, if we can be together in the end, I really don't care if it's later.

You tell me.

I took a look at my new hairstyle and it was nice! I lost the bet again.

I picked up my hat and went home, got on the bus again, and this time I didn't listen to any more music because I knew the end was home.

When I got home, I lazily collapsed on the bed, staring at the ceiling, my eyes glazed over, in a daze. After a while I got up and sat down in my chair and looked at a golden paper crane kept in a crystal cup, which was actually made of chocolate paper folded, and I liked it very much, it was a gift from her.

Thinking of what she said to me now is still quite warm, there are not too many truths in the world, a girl's blush can be worth a large piece of dialogue, but unfortunately she doesn't seem to have blushed, some of them still haven't changed, I'm still the boy who has one thing to say, and she's still the straight woman of steel.

After thinking about it for so long, I couldn't help but feel very empty, so let's write a soy sauce poem according to my previous habit.

I thought about it for a long time before I slowly put pen to paper.

"I knew you were coming, so I waited for you quietly!

I don't know when you were so beautiful that I didn't dare to look at you directly, but only quietly looked at the reflection on the water.

You are so prominent in the crowd, your soul is so interesting, it is better to look at the scenery than to look at you, please let me get closer to you.

Please take shelter from the rain in time when it thunders, because I don't have an umbrella and say that I can't do anything about it, please rest when I'm tired, because I want to buy a bottle of water for you, if you are wronged, please cry, I want you to lean on my shoulder to comfort and comfort you, how I hope we can be together, you have my stars shining in your eyes.

The summer wind can always blow the winter rain, the news that you are leaving, I feel surprised, I am waiting for you here quietly, the rain is mixed with tears to look at you, you leave from my side uneasily, I can't help but hug you, kiss you! Kiss you! The rain of tears slowly falls..."

I stopped writing, feeling like I was writing for someone, and if she saw it, she would have goosebumps all the way down, no, I had goosebumps all over the place, so I'd write one again.

"I want a rain in the sky to hide the tears that are about to fall, I want the crowd to crowd a little so that I can hold your hand, I want my memory to blur a little bit, so that I remember that you like me and not I like you.

I haven't hugged you once, but you've broken free from my arms ten thousand times. You have long hair in my memory, you have short hair in reality, you are like you in my dreams, and you hate me in your dreams.

Not knowing how to love you and look at you is the only way for me. ”

When I finished writing, I was relieved.

This should be about the same, there are a lot of regrets in life, a sentence from Harukami Muraki: "There are two kinds of regrets in love, one is that you once loved so seriously, but in the end you found that that person is not worth it at all." The other is that you don't love well, and you find out that it is a person who is truly worthy of love when you lose it. ”

And she may be the one who doesn't deserve it, and I hope I don't miss the one who really deserves it.

It's 5 p.m., so let's go cook first.