The cold wind is howling, the snowflakes are fluttering all over the sky, the extreme eye looks, the earth is white and boundless, there is no trace of the green of life, the sky is covered with dark clouds, as if it is about to collapse, the thick clouds isolate the blue sky and the bright sunshine, the heaven and the earth are like a huge oven, let the wind and snow destroy, to smelt the people into slag, into a slim dust.

There is a white expanse of left and right, no sunlight, no distinction between southeast and northwest, a lonely figure like an ant staggering forward in the wind and snow, step by step, leaving a long series of footprints.

The snow-covered land was cold and hard, as if it was about to shatter the feet that stepped on it, and the cold wind poured into Chu Xiang's clothes, raging in his body, stirring up countless pimples on the surface of his skin, Chu Xiang's heart was like this cold snow, as if it had been frozen, and he couldn't feel the biting cold wind.

21 degrees north latitude, evergreen all year round, the sun is scorching, every year there will be a place where people will be sunburned, winter is only a short two months, the temperature will never fall below zero, and there will be no snow, but the upheaval has changed everything, the land, the home, the people, everything is different.

The deserted city, the unrecognizable hometown, the word home has never been so heavy, and Chu Xiang was breathless.

Like most people, since college, Chu Xiang has been far away from home, at home for more than a month all year round, and even less after graduation, he is at home for ten days and a half a year, always thinking about making money and going home to serve his parents well. The elderly parents gradually became estranged, and the appearance of the home gradually blurred, until the great change occurred, everything was shattered into a blank, and the parents could no longer be seen.

People are always like this, and they feel precious when they lose it.

My home is gone, I'm still there, but am I still me?

Looking at the white land in front of him, Chu Xiang hoped that someone could give him an answer, but no one could give him an answer.

After a while, Chu Xiang sighed silently. He knew that he was no longer the same person he used to be. In order to live, too many people give up their persistence, and they are no exception, becoming the kind of person they hated the most before.

When people are young, they always fantasize that they will always maintain innocence, integrity, and kindness, and become the perfect person in their imagination, detached from the world, indifferent to fame and fortune, just like the heroes and heroes in the book. However, people will always change, and this change often comes unexpectedly, and it is easy to destroy the original intention, making people become philistine, cunning, cold-blooded, and intoxicated and complacent.

The footsteps moved slowly, and the closer I got to that familiar place, the more panicked I became. Feeling timid, Chu Xiang experienced this word so deeply for the first time.

Gray shadows loomed in the wind and snow, and the surrounding scenery became more and more familiar, Chu Xiang narrowed his eyes slightly, and he didn't know if the wind and snow were too big or there were tears in his eyes, so he didn't dare to carefully look at the dilapidated scene around him.

No matter how long the road is, it will eventually be finished, not to mention that this road is not long, and it is already home in the blink of an eye. Looking at the familiar place in front of him, Chu Xiang's heart throbbed inexplicably, hesitant and scared, this was a scene that he had never expected, and he didn't dare to go in when he arrived at the door, and he didn't even dare to open his eyes and take a closer look.

The low walls are covered with moss, which has been frozen by the ice and snow, the redbuds at the door have long since withered and died, the bright yellow houses have long since lost the warm and vibrant color of the morning glow under the washing of the sea, and under the cover of ice and snow, only a few dead longan trees in the yard are still sticking to the sky.

The iron gate had long been corroded and rusted by the seawater, and the remaining two iron rods were unyielding and unwilling to leave, slowly walking into the gate, Chu Xiang's heart throbbed even more, as if his heart had been knocked hard by a sledgehammer, and he trembled. Trying his best to turn his head, Chu Xiang's gaze stayed on the five small mounds in the courtyard that were about to be flattened by the sea, and the five stone tablets fell on them, and the words on the stone tablets were vaguely visible, which was shocking.

Chu Xiang suddenly raised his head to the sky and howled, and the fluttering snowflakes seemed to be unable to bear to hear this sad voice, drifting away from this small courtyard. Pick up five stone tablets that fell into the soil, the stone tablets that have been soaked in the sea for half a year are already full of moss, Chu Xiang carefully scraped off the silt and moss on them, and the handwriting on the five stone tablets is: the tomb of father Chu San, the tomb of mother Duan Lihong, the tomb of sister Chu Huaiyu, the tomb of younger brother Chu Kun, and the tomb of nephew Du Zitong.

Five tombstones, the fate of five loved ones, everything, after that distant war, all changed.

An inexplicable war, the roaring nuclear bomb buried one-fifth of the entire earth's population, and most of the remaining people died due to radiation and other reasons, and now less than one-tenth of the population survived. Since the outbreak of that war, when the earth is close to perihelion in November, the temperature will rise sharply, the ice and snow will melt, the sea level will rise, and in April, the earth will begin to move away from the sun, the temperature will drop, and soon it will drop below freezing, and the sea level will drop slightly, and at the end of April, the whole country will enter the low temperature below freezing, and all the places above 20 degrees in latitude will be covered with ice and snow, huge glaciers will be formed, and the sea level will fall, and at the end of May, it will be resurfaced.

The extremely cold climate has caused countless people who escaped the disaster of war to fall into death, and every day people are carried away by the cold wind and become statues in the world of ice and snow.

Now is the time when the sea has just receded, and the receding tide has taken away the strong radiation, but also the vitality of the land.

Planting the tombstone back on the grave, Chu Xiang sat down on the ground, and the howling cold wind quickly dried the wetness on his face. The five tombstones stood side by side, like a giant peak inserted in the heart, blocking the heart fiercely, Chu Xiang was speechless, and there was no sadness, only the uncontrollable throbbing in his heart, and the moistness in his eyes leached out.

Grief has long become a reef sinking in the bottom of my heart, allowing the waves to be turbulent and immovable.

There is only one person left in the family. Is this the luck of being alive, or is it their misfortune? If being alive is called lucky, then there will be no misfortune in this world, because misfortune is already dead.

Chu Xiang sat silently alone, and before he came back, he wanted to come back, but now that he is back, he doesn't know what to say. Alive, what a pitiful word, as humble as the dust on the soles of the feet, as if not even as good as ants. The good memories of the past are gradually expelled by the killing, the mind is full of blood, a heart is getting colder and colder, if the parents know what they are doing now, or they will not recognize this son, maybe it is the best choice to leave this world with them, but they don't want to go back.

Looking up at the sky, Chu Xiang let out a long sigh, took out the wine bottle, and took a sip of wine, the cold wine slid through his throat, and the coolness spread between his chest and abdomen, and then spread like a flame, but he couldn't shake the reef in his heart for half a minute.

Chu Xiang sighed again.

He didn't drink alcohol before, but now he drinks more and more, sometimes a sip of wine can keep people in spirit, let the enemy's sneak attack fail, it can also resist the cold, and it can also make him forget the past, and the wine also has a certain anti-radiation effect, although Chu Xiang is no longer afraid of radiation below 1000 roentgenium per hour, I don't know when it started, his body became as tough as steel, like the cold heart in his chest.

The heat in his chest dissipated, as if bringing back the feelings of this body, Chu Xiang murmured: "Dad, Mom, your son has changed, I don't know if you can still recognize him, this road is too far away from your expectations." ”

After a long time, Chu Xiang sighed: "Perhaps, I should try to turn back and not let you feel sorry for me." ”

Chu Xiang took another sip of wine, as if there was a fire spreading out in his chest, and touched the cold Chu Huaiyu on the tombstone: "My sister, I used to tell you not to be so naïve, not to be so good to people, but when I was no longer good to people, I guessed his intentions when I saw people, and I knew what a rare quality it was." ”

"But in this world, it's not that you treat others well, others will treat you well." Chu Xiang then continued, just like he always liked to debate with his sister before, he still didn't want to admit his mistakes when he had nothing to say.

After speaking, Chu Xiang suddenly laughed, it turns out that there are some things, but they still haven't changed, probably because simple feelings can always be retained for a longer time than complex people's hearts.

The expression that became soft suddenly disappeared when he saw the word Chu Kun, and after a long time, Chu Xiang sprinkled the wine in the bottle in front of the Chu Kun monument, and whispered: "The Great Wall is loess for thousands of miles, and the hero Xuan's name will last forever. Xiao Kun, if I don't tell you this, how good it would be, my father said, you are the best person he has ever told his fortune, the future of our family, you also live up to our expectations, you have been very good since you were a child, far more than me, if you are not so good, I didn't teach you this, how good it would be, our brothers will not be separated by yin and yang. ”

Fate is impermanent, Chu Xiang understands in his heart that such a result is not his responsibility, but he still can't forgive himself, but he feels even more guilty, if he could get there a day earlier, it won't be this result.

The mood was depressed and agitated, like a roller coaster, up and down, Chu Xiang was uncomfortable, suddenly looking up to the sky and roaring, the wind and snow turned sharply, and the four fields were agitated.

After a long time, Chu Xiang drank all the wine in the bottle in one gulp, touched Wang Zitong's tombstone and said, "Xiao Tongtong, my uncle tried his best, but he still couldn't find your father, forgive your uncle's incompetence." ”

Throwing away the wine bottle, Chu Xiang found a stone, cracked the stone to open the stele, and carved it on the stele with a knife: The tomb of brother-in-law Du Songwu, planted between Du Zitong and Chu Huaiyu, was silent for a long time, and said: "You are also a suffering person, may you find your way back." ”

Burning smoke and drinking, Chu Xiang breathed in the familiar smell of smoke, looked at the six tombstones in front of him, and for a long time, Chu Xiang muttered: "If everything is for survival, in order to live, now survival is no longer a problem, and I have no reason to go against my heart anymore." Mom and Dad, I hope you can show me the way forward, and I will try to be who you want me to be. Xiao Kun, the ideal I taught you, let me achieve it myself. ”

Putting all the wine he was carrying in front of the grave, Chu Xiang picked up the knife, looked around, jumped on the roof, and looked at the distant village. There is childhood, a beautiful childhood, I don't know if the beautiful childhood can bring back the memories of the past, and now he can only go back to the good memories of the past, and try to drown the reef in his heart with the beautiful past.