My husband and I met, knew and fell in love through the marriage network, I am eight years younger than him, whether it is appearance or connotation, I am a perfect couple in the minds of everyone. Friends joke that we are a model couple for remarriage today.

In the dead of night, my husband often hugged me in his arms, kissed my eyes and said "wife, I love you so much", and every time he asked me to respond, I used English "L love you", and he would always laugh and joke "It's hard to ask my wife to say that she loves me, but English is fine"......

However, ideals and reality are not always equal. We like each other, but the differences in living habits, life philosophies and personalities make us feel distressed by each other.

There is a saying called "the seven-year itch", and sure enough, in the seventh year, it is finally time to say "bye-bye". We calmly wrote the divorce agreement, and agreed to be a pair of good friends in the future, we could make an appointment to have tea and chat together, and I even promised to operate the request to pay for life on the Internet on his behalf every month.

After the Spring Festival in 2019, I returned to my daughter and waited at home for him to ask me to go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to go through the divorce procedures.

On March 28, when I opened WeChat, I suddenly found the CT report he sent, and I was stunned when I saw the words "primary liver cancer" and "portal vein cancer thrombus has formed".

I used to be unhappy that he had hepatitis B and hid it from me; once argued for his reluctance to throw away expired food; It used to be blocked by the frequent use of the microwave oven with the plastic bowl he used many years ago......

Is it because he has hepatitis A or B in the past, or is it because of bad lifestyle habits? I can't explain it.

He begged me to accompany him to the hospital for surgery the next day, and I replied to him and advised him not to have surgery. He was advised to consider going to a heavy ion hospital for treatment, which would not be too painful. He also thought of this, but at his own expense.

I know that with his character, he will not easily lower his profile. Sure enough, he told me that he had been rejected when he asked his ex-wife for help.

In order to get his ex-wife to agree to the divorce, he gave up almost all the property (including cash) he had worked hard to start a business, leaving only two of the worst houses in the suburbs of Shanghai. But there is a clause in the agreement: if he is in an emergency, his ex-wife and son will help him out of humanitarian aid. However, his ex-wife asked him to write a will for the only remaining second house before agreeing to borrow money...... He refused.

He asked his buddy who usually drinks outside--the old classmate to help, and the old classmate agreed, but when he was full of expectations, the old classmate broke his trust and never replied. In desperation, he came to me hard.

Reason tells me: we've broken up! His narrow machismo eventually became the trigger for our divorce. The phrase "move all your belongings out by the 15th" still rings in my ears......

But the emotion reminded me that with his current situation, there would be no relatives other than me by his side. If I abandon him, the mental breakdown will accelerate the deterioration of his condition. I will help even if a friend needs it, not to mention that we once loved each other.

The next day he drove to the subway to pick me up, and for the first time, he said to me very gently and frustratedly: "Wife, I gave up such a good wife as you, this is God punishing me". My eyes moistened, and I looked at him in a trance, with mixed feelings.

When we got home, we started to prepare for the sale of the vacation property on Long Island that we had purchased after the wedding, and to prepare for the medical expenses of the heavy ion hospital......

In order to make peace, my uncle and his wife once came to us separately to persuade us, hoping that I would always be their sister-in-law...... I was very touched to learn that I promised to accompany him after his illness, but it also reminded me that the next road is not easy, especially the eldest brother's temper, which will be even worse after his illness.

According to the doctor's prediction, my husband will only survive for 3-6 months, but I hope that my companionship can play a vital role.

…… Now we have spent a year on the uneven road of seeking medical treatment, read all the things in the world, and will continue to walk.

I understand that the next journey against cancer will be even more difficult. From today onwards, I will record every bit of it in writing, hoping to inspire patients like my husband.

I told my husband's younger siblings that I would do everything I could to prolong his life.

I always remember the saying, "We can't control the length of life, but we can grasp the breadth of life."