Text: Episode 40

1.

“8254874464”。

I frowned, my brain racing, remembering where the numbers came from.

This set of numbers came to my mind.

But I can't remember it anyway.

This set of numbers seems to have something to do with a girl, but where did she start to appear, and what is the meaning of her existence, one question after another hit my brain.

With my eyes glued to the computer screen and the page quickly flipping upwards, I wanted to find out where the numbers came from, and if I could know what they were in, I should be able to know what they really meant.

From the beginning to the end, I also did not find the source of the numbers.

It is very likely that I imagined that this set of numbers was just a fleeting existence that appeared in my dreams.

The numbers bounced around in my subconscious, generating the numbers, and then I memorized them.

There is also a possibility that this set of numbers was not written by me, but by him.

He was the one who gave the numbers some meaning, but he never told me.

It haunted me like a spell.

15:08。

I wanted to call him again and ask him if he had any impression of this set of numbers, curiosity urged the brain, like a familiar person, who obviously had his appearance in his mind, but couldn't remember his name anyway, tried to think about it, tried to think about it, and the more eager he was, the more he couldn't remember.

The moment my fingertips touched my phone, I hesitated.

The call with him is no longer as natural as it used to be.

I slowly adjusted my breathing, the oxygen inhaled made my brain more awake, and then I withdrew my hand, just closed my eyes, a crisp message sounded, and I looked down to see that it was the three words he sent: "I'm leaving."

He's gone.

2.

I have always wanted to go to Chengdu to see why it is called "less than Sichuan, old out of Shu".

Looking at the train ticket in my hand, I was not excited, but fell into a deep uneasiness.

Lao Cao has been feeling very strange to me recently, as if he has become another person, a character in Untitled.

If it was really him who wrote a novel to go crazy, it would be terrible.

He will gradually lose the distinction between what is real and what is fictional in his novels.

The crazy Jack from "The Shining" and the smirking Mott Rainey from "The Secret Window" came to mind.

I think I should go see him before I go, and if something really goes wrong with him, I'll have to convince him.

3.

15:30。

At 34 degrees Celsius, the perceived temperature is much higher than that.

Southwesterly winds of three to four degrees.

Outside the window there was the sound of sparrows, and the sound of "Mind you, reversing".

Not far away, the exhaust of the hotel was whistling and humming.

The weather was so hot that the old people who used to sit in pairs to cool off had disappeared.

Except for those who had to run under the scorching sun in order to make a living, most people hid in the shade and were too lazy to move.

The afternoon sun was still hot, and the heat did not diminish because of the west.

A gust of wind blew outside the window, and the heat wave rolled in.

The stubbornly growing plants on the roof swayed in pain.

There was a dog barking downstairs, and the barking was so weak.

Take the subway at the train station and pour the number 4 bus.

I have a special affection for the No. 4 bus, and as for what kind of feeling, it will lead to another past story.

But now I was in no mood to think about the past, my body was sticky, the sweat on my forehead was running down my cheeks, my nose could smell the salty smell of sweat, and my clothes were clinging to my chest and back, which made me feel like I couldn't breathe.

I was carrying simple luggage, one hand on the handlebar, the other on the back of the saddle.

The girl sitting in the seat was dressed very little, and her chest was very plump, and she had to cover her neckline with one hand, and from time to time she had to cover her nose and cut my flesh with her eyes.

I don't want to sweat like that.

But this old bus without air conditioning is like a steamer.

Part of the city bus company's lines are contracted to the company in the society to operate, in order to save costs, this car will not be replaced without scrapping.

I was trapped in this cage with the girl sitting in front of me, I might be a leek, she was a crystal clear shrimp.

But no matter what it was, we all huddled together and hated each other.

"Wine outside the old village, the more you drink, the more you have! Remind you, Anle Street has arrived! Ahead to the station Fair Street! Please pay attention to the safety of your feet and stand firm! ”

There was a synthesized sound from the electronic radio of the newspaper station, which made people feel uncomfortable.

The times are advancing, science and technology are becoming more and more developed, and there will definitely be artificial intelligence buses in the future.

I looked out the window of the car, and I was in a terrible mood.

I refunded my train ticket and squeezed into the bus to see my good brother, or my former good brother.

I sighed and wondered what he would think of me.

4.

In addition to other place names, most of the streets in the city are named with words such as "harmony, peace, peace, happiness, happiness...... and so on, which appear in the mouths of the common people and convey good hopes.

Somewhat anxious and uneasy, I thought for a moment that this was simply ridiculous, and how many of us think deeply about the meaning of the name when we mention it?

They're just symbols.

When people are alive, they become symbols when they are alive.

The house I rented was in an old building in the old town, which was built in the early nineties of the twentieth century.

The building is not much younger than me.

Now its temporary owner is him.

From the bus stop to the farmer's market near my home to the supermarket, I went around in a big circle, bubbling like a crispy roast pig against the huge sun that had long since lost its silhouette and melted into the sky.

With beer in his hand, Daokou roast chicken, spicy duck intestines, boiled vegetables and boiled edamame, he thought about it and took a detour to buy his favorite chicken soup and tofu rolls.

Climbing up to the fifth floor, I panted and kicked the door.

The old corridor was not very airy, and there was a stuffy smell mixed with a musty smell.

It took a long time before his voice came from behind the door.

"Who?"

"Lao Cao, it's me, hurry up and open the door."

"You?"

The voice was very familiar, high-pitched, but I don't know if I was thinking too much, and there was exhaustion and fear in the voice.

He answered as he opened the door.

I kicked his sneakers out of the doorway and made room to take off the shoes I was wearing and put them on.

Then I realized that he was looking at me with his mouth open, his eyes glazed over, his hair was messy, his beard was unshaved, and he was messy everywhere, except for the computer desk.

I grinned and said, "I'm thinking about seeing you before I leave, and then I'll ask you for a drink, I don't know how long it will take me to leave." ”

He took the bag from my hand.

"Sit, sit, don't act like it's not your home, and let me greet you, I'll go and chill the beer in the fridge."

"I also bought a roast chicken." I went to the bathroom to wash my face, pulled my slippers and brought the roast chicken from the table to the kitchen, and began to tear the roast chicken by hand, and the smell of greasy meat spread.

He was also busy going in and out, but he didn't speak, he didn't even look up at me, and occasionally stopped what he was doing with a thoughtful look.

I coughed lightly.

"Isn't the response to the serialization not very good?" I put the torn roast chicken on a plate, and then cleaned up the stacked bottles and cans on the dining table to make room, "It's not a big deal, you've published so many short stories, don't worry, it's gold that shines." ”

"I published ......," he went into the kitchen and brushed two cups, "and you wrote a large part of it." ”

"Can you stop talking about this, talk about something else."

He put down the plate and said, "Beer is a little more town, cool, thirty-seven degrees today." ”

"Where is this, the hot days are ahead, but fortunately, we are not the stuffy heat in the south." I took the remote control and turned on the TV and tuned to the record channel, which is my must-see channel when watching TV.

What is playing on TV is a live-action documentary about "Bare-ass Brother" surviving on an isolated island.

I stared at the TV, "Did your girlfriend contact you?" ”

"Nope."

"Don't stay at home all the time, go out and walk around when you have nothing to do."

"It's a hot day."

"Come with me to Chengdu for a walk?"

"I don't want to go anywhere."

He looked very strange, sitting at the dining table with his head down, looking at the roast chicken on the plate, the corners of his mouth twitched from time to time, and he looked absent-minded when talking to me.

“8254874464。”

"What?"

He looked up at me, "8254874464." ”

"What do you say? Telephone? ”

His eyes were full of disappointment, and he shook his head and said, "Don't you know either?" ”

"You know what?"

The light in the room dimmed, and he sat at the dining table with his back to the window, his head bowed, and fell into the shadows of the backlight.

5.

After a long time, the "bare-ass brother" on TV had finished his performance, and I took two bottles of Sparley draft beer from the refrigerator and said, "Can you not do this?" For you and I have refunded my train tickets, you will reimburse me for the refund fee? ”

He ignored me, and I smiled awkwardly as I opened the beer and handed it to him.

Mechanically raised his hand to take the beer and poured a big sip himself, he had long been accustomed to "blowing on the bottle" and rarely used the cup.

"You're in a very bad state right now, can you feel it yourself?" I pushed my glass open and drank it straight from the bottle.

He put down the beer bottle, looked up at me, and still didn't speak.

This atmosphere made me very uncomfortable, as uncomfortable as I was, I subconsciously raised my hand and rubbed the skin in front of my neck, and wiped the sweat on my forehead.

"You don't blame me?"

"Why do you blame you?" I know I'm knowingly asking.

He laughed dryly.

I picked up the beer and took another sip, but it was cold but not flying.

"Actually, I know it all in my heart, but I'm not as lucky as you, the same thing, it's useless for me to contribute, just get it in your hands." I put down the bottle and said, "And you don't know, I said that I was a novelist, and everyone around me laughed at me, and if I didn't make a move, I could only work step by step, make money, be a grandson, and make me look like a normal person." I'm not as free and easy as you, no matter what others say, you just stick to it. ”

"Isn't writing a novel normal in the eyes of others...... It will make others think that you are not doing your job properly, and you are talking about dreams, I know. He pursed his lips and continued: "To put it bluntly, it's just that you didn't persevere, you didn't succeed, think about what the 'others' you said would think if you won the Nobel Prize in Literature?" ”

"Can persistence lead to success?"

In the past, we would discuss a certain issue like we did today, and even end up with a pole lift, and the two of us would have a good drink at the end, but now there is a very subtle change in my heart.

"Persistence may not be successful, but if you don't persevere, you will certainly not succeed." He took a sip of beer, "Other people's opinions of you are only based on your current situation, most people in this world are very snobbish, and other people's opinions are so serious, right?" ”

"Not heavy?" I asked rhetorically.

He thought about it, and was stunned.

"It took a lot of effort, but no one recognized it."

He still didn't speak.

"You understand the reason, why can't you see the point?"

He put down the bottle in his hand, the corners of his mouth twitching.

6.

"Did you notice ......," he sighed halfway through his words, then "giggled" so that I couldn't scratch my head, and said with a smile, "what about my fate...... What about fate...... What about life...... It's all out of my control. ”

I didn't know how to answer, and he had already stood up, and took a big sip with the bottle in one hand, and the wine poured out of his mouth, and then his nose was filled with beer, and he began to cough violently, laughing as he coughed, and then he let out a low roar, and staggered to the window, and raised his hand to the sky, "I will not abandon the world, but the world will forsake me." One ride without Ni boat, eight poles longitudinal rudder. Yan Ke jumped on the horse, and Tang Shengan dared to ridicule. Don't be alarmed by pearl diving, and the avenue can be secretly returned. Therefore, there is a pine moon in the mountain, and Chi Er plays Qinghui. ”

He was almost insane, and drank again, and after dividing the bottle by two, he drank the rest of the wine in the bottle, opened the screen window and threw the bottle downstairs.

"Do you want to die?"

With the sound of the bottle shattering, someone downstairs scolded.

He smiled "hehe", opened the refrigerator to get the wine, opened the cap with his teeth, and poured it violently.

I picked up my chopsticks and took a piece of duck intestine and put it in my mouth like chewing wax.

The people downstairs were still scolding, but he sat back at the table and muttered: "Don't say the word death in the future, it's unlucky, unlucky, unlucky!" ”

"Can you control your fate?" He picked up the bottle and touched my beer bottle, which for so many years meant to signal me to drink with him.

I also took a big sip from the bottle and thought, "No." He thought about it again, "What do you mean?" Does studying hard to be admitted to Tsinghua University and Peking University count? ”

"Hahaha! And then you changed your fate? ”

"Isn't it?"

"Have you ever thought about it - the process of hard work, the hardships paid, and the final result, are also arranged by God, he just plans the route, sets the plot, and you just follow it."

This kind of thought was really scary, and my mind was very messed up with him, "Hey, do you think this has anything to do with me?" Let's talk about something else? ”

"It's related to me, and it's related to you." He pointed to the computer and continued, "It's all about us." ”

"What's the relationship?"

"You and I are both designing the plot, and he is at the mercy of you and me while we are at the mercy of them."

It was like I had been given an electric shock, he was just talking nonsense, he had drunk too much.

"I didn't drink much, how much did I drink?"

I had to take the initiative to find a topic, "What's next for you?" ”

"What's next?" He gulped down another beer, and took the third bottle when he saw the bottom of the second bottle, "I don't know what I have planned, I'm waiting for him to tell me what to do next, hahaha." ”

"Drink slowly." I snatched the bottle from his hand, "What's the hurry?" What we have is time. ”

"No...... There's no time, I'm in my thirties, and I haven't achieved anything. ”

"That's what I'm calling for nothing."

"Neither of them accomplished anything."

He said, gesturing behind me.

Instantly, I felt a chill on my back, and the heat wave hit me from the window, but my hairs stood on end.

7.

The two of them, who are the two of them?

I licked my lips and turned my head to look in the direction he was pointing.

He pointed to the computer desk, where the computer monitor flickered on and off.

"Who?" I asked.

8.

I turned around and sat stupidly and forgot to drink.

At this moment, there was a knock on the door.

Immediately after the knock on the door, I was so startled that my heart beat a drum, and the sudden sound made my heart almost jump out of my throat.

Steady in my mind, I sighed, rubbed my eyes with both hands, stood up and walked to the door and asked.

"Who?"

No one answered me.

"Who?"

I asked again.

Still no one answered me.

After thinking about it, I put my eyes to the cat's eye on the door, intending to see who was outside.

There was not enough light in the hallway, and a shadow could be faintly seen shaking.

I tried to see clearly, but the shadow suddenly stopped shaking and suddenly became close to the cat's eye.

Snow-white face, cheeks painted red, raised black corners of the mouth, long curved eyebrows, black round eyes.

9.

"You?"

He slammed the table with his wine bottle, making a "clang" sound, like a knock on the door.

I retracted my thoughts, turned my head, and sat stupidly, forgetting to drink.

"Did you see them?"

"Who?"

I swallowed, picked up the bottle and took a sip, the images that flashed through my head made me uncomfortable, but I knew none of them were true.

"They." With that, he pointed behind me again.

"Don't act like a psychopath." I continued to drink, and the cold beer stimulated my body, "I think you're going to have a magic barrier, you can't put all your mind on Untitled, or why don't you go home for a few days?" ”

"No, I can't go home yet, it's not time for me to go home."

His answer reassured me that he would be divided.

"Do you want to come with me......"

"Look at what? I've seen so much more than you do. ”

I nodded, and I wanted to take him to see a psychiatrist, "Let's go out for a drink, it's getting dark, and it's cooler outside than inside." ”

"Get out? Where to? ”

"Eating hot pot?"

Text: Episode 40 -End-