Little Four is a waste this year.

Family, some things in life are tangled together, and in addition to the pressure he puts on himself, Xiao Si is confused at this time.

Is writing a book a hobby or a profession?

What does the future hold?

Should people get by, or what?

To be honest, I still had a lot of dreams at the beginning, but today I can't find where my dreams are.

Writing books is purely a literary interest (boastful).

Because I couldn't find my dream before, the original dream when I was a child is now just a store in the corner of the holiday, and I don't even dare to reminisce. Over the years, individuals have been getting by, playing, and not thinking too much.

Many times, I feel isolated from the world, or I have taken myself out of it.

Xiao Si has also experienced a lot, and the feeling after falling from a height can be regarded as a pain in the skin in a way, especially when he has been unlucky for several years in a row.

In the past, I always thought that family affection was very pure, but later I found that in addition to my parents, too many others were nonsense.

Other people's children, I think many people have experienced it.

The Chinese New Year is more about the kind of casual comparison between relatives, especially in an environment where they will be compared since childhood.

Even when I was studying, my grades were very good, but the people I could play with were generally the ones with poor grades.

At that time, I kept thinking if I could be pure?

Is everyone living hypocritically?

Growing up to the present, I am also a Ben 30 person, and I have truly discovered that the best weapons to hurt people are always words and eyes.

Especially when you become a negative example of hurting Zhongyong, as a relative and friend, you still have to purse your mouth and smile in the face of your elders.

Even if your heart is fried, you have to pay attention to etiquette. Especially if you're in a big family that is more polite in itself.

This is the only remaining advantage in the eyes of your elders.

It's the New Year, and Xiaosi won't go back.

Not wanting to go back, to be exact.

Although fundamentally speaking, it is a problem as a son, but the reason why I don't want to go back is because when I hurt Zhongyong, my mother was ridiculed, and my father almost didn't give Xiaosi a smile for three years.

Even when he was with his younger brother, his father would only give his younger brother a smile at first, and he turned his face away.

In my heart, I knew that I had a problem, and I had failed my parents' expectations and let them down.

But at that time, I just wanted my father to laugh and encourage, but ......

Everything is inferior, but reading is high.

Even when the grades were good at that time, what I thought about most was not that. At that time, I cautiously put forward my little dream, but it's a pity.

was destroyed by the teacher's family and relatives, that was the evil way, in their opinion.

Sometimes I wonder, who am I living for?

Even now, I don't feel like I'm living for myself.

It can be said that Xiao Si has gone from optimism to pessimism over the years, and I am afraid of the future that I can't see.

Even if it's my girlfriend, I'm not sure if I can really give her real happiness.

It is said that a man should stand up to the sky, but at some point, a person's shoulders are really only so wide, and there is no infinite negative gravity.

A person's most intimate friend is not someone else, but his own shadow.

Even if you have more family and friends, you still feel lonely.

When a series of things such as countless expectations, ridicule, and jokes of expectation fell on the shoulders, the knees that wanted to hold on were a little soft.

The heart is tired, the person is tired.

Maybe it's Xiaosi's escape, maybe it's complaining, maybe it's because he's too pure, maybe it's because he can't think of saying a few words casually, which makes people laugh.

Excuse me. (To be continued......)