Father Yu sat at the desk and sighed and said, "Your mother is such a person, with a knife mouth and a tofu heart, maybe she will regret it after a while." Don't blame her, you know when you're so big, your mother starts her temper like that. Fang, have you eaten? Daddy will get you something to eat. ”

Yu Fangfang bit her lip to prevent herself from crying. The father of this family earns money alone, and he has to provide for the three brothers and sisters to go to school, support their grandmother, and give their mother money to honor their grandmother. Yu Fangfang knew that her father was working very hard, and she shouldn't let him worry about herself.

Yu Fangfang endured crying and whispered, "Dad, I ate; I know, you don't have to worry about me, you're tired of the day, go eat. ”

Father Yu said with relief: "Then you can rest early." Study hard, and when you go to university, you can go to school in other places. ”

Yu Fangfang nodded. That night, Yu Fangfang slept very unsteadily, and kept having nightmares.

Later, one day, her father called Yu Fangfang to her and gave her her the mobile phone: "Fangfang, look at this mobile phone, you teach your father how to send text messages." ”

Yu Fangfang knew that her father wanted her to play with her mobile phone, so she made this excuse. Yu Fangfang pretended not to know, fumbled for a while, and then seriously taught her father how to send text messages.

Later, Yu Fangfang never touched her father's mobile phone again, and even if her father put the mobile phone on her desk, she would not look at it again.

Yu Fangfang, who was lying on the bed, thought of this, and her tears flowed unobediently again, just like the rain outside.

When Yu's mother and Yu Wenwen left, the weather was still good, but I don't know when it was overcast, and it rained, Yu Fangfang got up and stood in front of the window, looking at the hurried people in the garden community, she suddenly thought of death again.

When she was young, the most her mother scolded her was to let her die. When she argued with her mother about her partiality, her mother always said, "You think I'm partial, so why don't you die!" ”

Before high school, although Yu Fangfang had been scolded to death by her mother, Yu Fangfang had never delved into it. It may be small, and I don't think much about it, although there are times when I am sad and sad, but I quickly forget it. But since she went to high school, Yu Fangfang really thought about dying, and how to die Yu Fangfang had planned.

She wants to eat poison, and she has it at home, called dichlorvos. She'd heard people say that they drank it when someone committed suicide. She wanted to drink dichlorvos and then burn it on a large fire, so that no one knew. She wanted to leave quietly. But she has never done it, maybe because her high school studies are too heavy, or because her mother's occasional tenderness and care for her, she is reluctant to give up this maternal love.

Later, when Yu Fangfang filled in the volunteers, she filled in a school far away from home.

But after eight years away from home, Yu Fangfang came back, she still couldn't give up this family affection, and her heart still longed for this home. Even if her mother had treated her like that.

At this time, Yu Fangfang thought of death again.

Her family lives on the 16th floor, and she wants to jump off like this, and everything will be over.

She thought that since she was a child, her mother didn't like her, her younger siblings didn't like her, and everything she did was wrong. She remembered the time when she was in junior high school, she and her mother, younger siblings sat in front of the TV to watch Huanzhu Gege, when they were amused by a plot and laughed, but just when Yu Fangfang was happy to laugh, she was slapped twice by her mother inexplicably. And Yu Xiaowei and Yu Wenwen have been blaming Fangfang because her laughter made her mother angry.

Look, it's wrong for me to even laugh. Yu Fangfang thought bitterly.

After getting married, Zhang Jianguo was good and bad to her, such a marriage was meaningless, and now she can't even keep her own children. Thinking of the child, Yu Fangfang's heart pinched again. The child is gone, what is the point of her still alive. Yes, no one can tolerate her, so what is the meaning of her life.

She said silently in her heart: "Baby, don't be afraid, mom is here to accompany you, mom go and hug you, you won't be cold." ”

Yu Fangfang found the key to the window, opened the diamond net, and then took off the iron pipes embedded in the window one by one. This window was specially installed by Zhang Jianguo for their children, so that they would not have to worry about the children falling out of the window.

The iron pipe is a bit dense, and it is quite troublesome to take.

Suddenly, a voice came from behind: "What are you doing?" ”

Zhang Jianguo didn't know when he would come back.

Yu Fangfang was stunned for a moment, yes, what is she doing.

Zhang Jianguo's voice was still lukewarm: "You can't stand it with such a blow, do I dare to live with you like this?" ”

Yu Fangfang turned around and looked at Zhang Jianguo stupidly. I haven't seen her for a few days, Yu Fangfang's face has become even worse, and the whole person is haggard, Zhang Jianguo wanted to continue to say some cruel words, but when he saw Yu Fangfang's appearance, his heart softened.

Zhang Jianguo walked over and took the iron pipe from Yu Fangfang's hand, and then installed it on the window again. Yu Fangfang thought, why is this thing so convenient when it is installed, but it is so troublesome when it is taken to take it, it took a long time for him to remove the six, but Zhang Jianguo quickly installed all the six.

She just looked at Zhang Jianguo like that, and after not seeing her for a few days, Zhang Jianguo was also haggard, with a scruffy beard on his face, wrinkled clothes, and a strong smell of smoke on his body.

Zhang Jianguo closed the window and turned around to see Yu Fangfang looking at him stupidly, and felt a little uncomfortable, walked over and gently pulled Yu Fangfang into his arms, and said softly: "I'm sad that the child is gone, I don't know how to face it, I'm very messed up, I'm sorry, I shouldn't lose my temper with you." ”

Yu Fangfang suddenly burst into tears, Zhang Jianguo patted her on the back and gently comforted her.

At this moment, Yu Fangfang forgave Zhang Jianguo again, just like after being beaten by her mother at that time, because of her mother's concern, Yu Fangfang abandoned all her mother's bad treatment of her and forgave Zhang Jianguo like her mother.

Yu Fangfang, who was still desperate just now, was in a better mood at this time, but when she thought of the child, her heart began to pinch again.

In the days since, Yu Fangfang and Zhang Jianguo have rarely gotten better, but no one is mentioning the matter of children. Only when Zhang Jianguo was away, Yu Fangfang would think about the child like crazy, and once, Yu Fangfang began to unconsciously open the window again, and was later woken up by the cold night wind. Another time, Yu Fangfang was cutting vegetables and suddenly wanted to commit suicide with a knife, but was interrupted by the person who came to check the natural gas.

When the weather is good, Zhang Jianguo will take Yu Fangfang out to take a walk in the courtyard of the community and bask in the sun.

Yu Fangfang didn't feel in a good mood, only felt dizzy for a while, his eyes were black, and the soles of his feet were particularly painful, Yu Fangfang said that it seems that the old man said that it makes sense that you can't go out in confinement, Zhang Jianguo said that you are superstitious, you have been lying in bed for a long time, there are few grounds, and you don't go out, so that's why you are like this.

Yu Fangfang thought maybe.

Finally came to the end of the confinement, and Yu Fangfang couldn't wait to go to work. But on the first day of work, Yu Fangfang felt that the wind was drilling all over her body, especially when she got off work at noon, she was catching up with the strong wind, Yu Fangfang instantly felt that the wind was drilling straight into her brain, and she caught a cold when she got up after going back for a lunch break.

Yu Fangfang had to rest for more than ten days before going to work.