Our family still doesn't know where my mother is from, what her name is, and why she is crazy? Mother's milk has "neurosis"?

Twenty-three years ago, a young woman came to our village, she was ragged and unkempt, she smirked at people, and she did not shy away from urinating in public, and some men in the village often circled around her.

Therefore, the daughters-in-law in the village often spat on the woman, and some of them even stepped forward and kicked her a few times, telling her to "get away".

But she just didn't leave, still smirking and wandering around the village.

At that time, my father was 35 years old, and he had had his left hand amputated by a machine in a stone quarry, and because of his family's poverty, he had never been able to marry.

When the grandmother saw that the woman still had some looks, she moved her mind, circled around the crazy woman three times, nodded and said, "Well, yes, you can have a baby at a glance." ”

My grandmother decided to take her in as my father's daughter-in-law, and wait for her to pass on an incense to my family, and then see if the situation drove her away.

Although the father was reluctant, he gritted his teeth and agreed. As a result, the father became a groom without spending a penny.

Needless to say, this woman later became my own mother.

When I was born, my mother was so painful that she came back to life, screaming "whoa".

Grandma lit three pillars of incense in the room and prayed for a long time. Then, the two midwives clamped the mother one on the left and the other on the right, and forcibly let the mother put her hands on the ladder, squatting down with her legs, and a large wooden footbasin under the mother's crotch, in which several knives of straw paper and soft cloth were placed.

The midwife didn't care whether the mother could understand what they meant, and told the mother vigorously: "Work hard, work hard." Hard, crazy woman......"

This production took more than 7 hours, and my mother "hung" on the ladder for 7 hours.

When my loud cry finally came from under my mother's crotch, the two midwives were so tired that they couldn't move, and it was still the umbilical cord that my grandmother cut for me. The mother, who had been controlled by the midwife for seven hours, also cried because she had been liberated.

My grandmother hugged me, and said happily with a mouth that had few teeth left: "This crazy woman also gave birth to a grandson with a handle." ”

Grandma treated her mother with a crockpot of hen soup. That day, my mother sat quietly on the bed with a small basin on top of the quilt, and my grandmother brought a bowl of chicken soup to my mother and said, "Take it well, don't splash it." Bone slag spits in this basin, do you hear me? If you don't obey, I'll beat you. Grandma said half-intimidating, half-serious.

The mother took the chicken soup and nodded. She grabbed a chicken leg and gnawed it all over her mouth. The mother was really obedient and spit the chicken bones in the basin in a regular manner. She ate all the big bowl of soup.

It's just that when I was born, my grandmother took me away, and never let my mother get around.

I don't blame my grandmother for being ruthless, there was such a tragedy in our village: a woman married a bachelor in our village, and although the woman was not crazy, she was mentally retarded. After giving birth to a son, she turned over and crushed her son while sleeping at night, and the woman was beaten by the man and kicked out of the door.

With such an example in front of her, how dare grandma be careless?

My mother always wanted to hug me, and shouted hard in front of my grandmother many times: "Give, give me ......" Grandma ignored her. I'm so small, what if my mother misses and throws me on the ground? After all, my mother is a madman.

Whenever my mother asked to hold me, my grandmother always pricked up her eyes and reprimanded her: "Don't think about holding the child, I won't give it to you." If I find out you're stealing him, I'll kill you. Even if I don't kill you, I'm going to drive you away. Grandma said this without the slightest ambiguity.

My family struggled in the quagmire of poverty, especially after adding my mother and me, the family often couldn't open the pot. Grandma decided to drive her mother away, because her mother not only ate "idle dinner" at home, but also caused trouble from time to time.

One day, my grandmother cooked a big pot of rice, added a big bowl to my mother, and said, "Daughter-in-law, this family is too poor, mother-in-law is sorry for you." After you finish eating this bowl of rice, you will go to find someone richer to live, and you will not be allowed to come in the future, ah? ”

My mother just picked up a large lump of rice in her mouth, and when she heard the "eviction order" issued by her grandmother, she was very surprised, and the lump of rice froze in her mouth.

My mother looked at me in my grandmother's arms and cried out inarticulately: "No, don't ......"

Grandma suddenly sank her face, and suddenly took out her majestic paternalistic style and shouted: "You crazy woman, what are you strong, you won't have your good fruit to eat." You're already wandering around, and I've taken you in for a year or two, so what are you going to do? Eat a bowl of rice and leave, do you hear? ”

Grandma took out a digging hoe from behind the door, and slammed it on the ground like She Taijun's dragon cane, making a dull dark sound with a "bang".

The mother was startled, looked at her mother-in-law timidly, and slowly lowered her head to look at the rice bowl in front of her, and tears fell on the white rice on the ground.

Under the forced gaze of her grandmother, her mother suddenly had a very strange move, she divided more than half of the rice in the bowl to the other empty bowl, and then looked at her grandmother pitifully.

Grandma was stunned, it turned out that the mother was expressing her attitude to her grandmother, and she only ate half a bowl of rice at each meal, just begging not to drive her away.

Grandma's heart seems to have been pulled a few times, grandma is also a woman, and her tough attitude is also pretended.

Grandma didn't look over, held back her tears, and then put her face up again and said, "Eat quickly, eat quickly, eat quickly, and leave." You're going to starve to death in my house. ”

The mother seemed to be desperate, she didn't even eat the half bowl of rice, staggered out of the door, but stood in front of the door for a long time and didn't leave.

Grandma hardened her heart and said, "You go, you go, don't look back." There are many rich families in the world! ”

Instead, my mother walked over and stretched out her hands into my mother-in-law's arms, it turned out that my mother wanted to hug me. Grandma hesitated, but still handed me to my mother in swaddling clothes.

For the first time, my mother held me in her arms and grinned, smiling like a spring breeze. Grandma was like a great enemy, and her hands were under my mother's body, for fear that my mother's madness would come up and throw me away like garbage.

My mother hugged me for less than 3 minutes, and my grandmother couldn't wait to snatch me over, then turned around and went into the house and closed the door...

My mother finally left, but I still couldn't get out of poverty after leaving my mother's home. My family still lives a life of "three meals a day and one night at night".

And when I knew things ignorantly, I realized that except for me, other friends have mothers.

I asked my father and grandmother, and they said, "Your mother is dead." But my friend told me: "Your mother is a madman and was driven away by your grandmother." ”

I went to my grandmother to ask her to return my mother, and scolded her for being a "wolf grandmother", and even spilled the food she brought to me.

Grandma beat me for the first time in her life, and wiped away her tears with all kinds of grievances: "Little rabbit, your mother didn't do anything except give birth to you, and grandma pulled you up." You are good, and you will take revenge. If I had known, I would have let your crazy lady take you away. ”

At that time, I didn't have the concept of "crazy", I just knew that I missed my mother very much, what did she look like, and was she still alive?

Unexpectedly, when I was six years old, my mother, who had been away from home for 5 years, actually returned.

That day, a few friends flew to report to me: "Xiaoshu, go and see, your mother is back, your crazy mother is back." ”

I was so happy that I ran out, and my father and grandmother chased me out.

This is the first time I have seen my mother since I have a memory. She was still in rags, and there were some yellow scraps of grass in her hair, and God knows in which haystack she spent the night.

My mother didn't dare to enter the house, but she faced my house, sitting on the stone in the rice field in front of the village, and holding a dirty balloon in her hand.

When I stood in front of her with a group of friends, she eagerly searched for her son from among us, and my mother finally stared at me, staring at me and calling me with a grin: "Little tree...... Ball...... Ball ......"

My mother stood up, kept raising the balloon in her hand, and stuffed it into my arms flatteringly.

I slammed back. I was disappointed, I didn't expect that the mother I thought about day and night was such an image. I knew that the crazy lady was like this, and I missed what she was doing.

A little friend coaxed on the side and said, "Xiaoshu, you know what a madman is like now, right?" It's your mother. I angrily said to my little friend, "She's your mother!" Your mother is crazy, your mother is like this. I turned around and left. I don't want this crazy girl.

Surprisingly, my grandmother and father led my mother through the door. Back then, after my grandmother drove my mother away, the villagers talked a lot, and my grandmother's conscience was tortured.

As she grew older day by day, her heart could no longer harden, so she took the initiative to keep her mother, and my boss was not happy, and my mother lost my face.

I never gave my mother a good look, never took the initiative to talk to her, let alone me call her "mother", the communication between us is mainly based on my "roar", and my mother will never dare to talk back.

You can't raise your mother in vain at home. The grandmother decided to train her mother to do some chores, and when she went to work in the field, the grandmother took her out to "observe", saying that if she was disobedient, she would be beaten.

Although she really wants to fight, grandma is far from being her opponent, but her mother is silent about her grandmother, no matter how crazy her mother is, she also knows that this gray-haired, hobbling mother-in-law is manipulating her "power of life and death", and she must not be provoked.

Grandma asked her mother to cut the grass, and she cut the grass; When she was asked to collect firewood, she went to collect firewood.

After some time, my grandmother thought that my mother had been trained by herself, so she asked my mother to go out to cut pigweed alone. Unexpectedly, it only took half an hour for my mother to cut two baskets of "pigweed", and my grandmother saw it, and she was anxious and panicked. Grandma angrily scolded her for being a "crazy woman", "not distinguishing between grain and grass", and "living is to make dung"......

When my grandmother was thinking about how to deal with the aftermath, the owner of the rice field came to me and said that my grandmother had deliberately instigated it. Grandma was furious, took out a mallet in front of others and knocked it on the back of the mother, saying, "Kill you crazy woman, you get the old lady away......

Although my mother is crazy, she still knows the pain, she jumped and avoided her grandmother's mallet, and kept wailing "don't, don't" from her mouth.

In the end, people couldn't see it and took the initiative to say: "Forget it, we won't pursue it." In the future, it will be ...... to look at her strictly."

After the turmoil subsided, the mother was sobbing on the ground. I said to her disdainfully, "You can't tell the difference between grass and rice, you are such a pig." ”

As soon as I finished speaking, I received a slap on the back of the head, which was hit by my grandmother. Grandma glared at me and scolded: "Little bunny, why are you talking? No matter what, she's also your mother! ”

I pouted disdainfully: "I don't have such a stupid crazy girl!" ”

"Ho, you're really getting more and more ambitious, see if I don't kill you." Grandma raised her slap again, and then I saw my mother jump up from the ground like a spring, and lay between me and my grandmother, and my mother pointed to her head and screamed, "Hit me, hit me".

I understand, my mother told my grandmother to beat her, don't beat me. Grandma's hand raised in mid-air hung down, and she murmured, "This crazy woman actually knows it in her heart!" ”

Not long after I went to school, my father was invited by a professional fish farmer in a neighboring village to guard the fish pond, and in addition to mixing three meals a day, he could earn 50 yuan a month.

My mother still went out to work under the leadership of my grandmother, mainly to fight pigweed, and I didn't cause any big trouble.

I remember one winter day when I was in the third grade of elementary school, it suddenly rained in the sky, and my grandmother asked my mother to bring me an umbrella. My mother may have fallen several times along the way, like a mud monkey, she stood by the classroom window and looked at me and smirked, and shouted, "Tree...... Umbrella ......"

Some of my classmates giggled and I was so embarrassed that I waved at her and told her to walk away.

The mother was unmoved, and still stood there shouting: "Tree...... Umbrella ......" Fan Jiaxi, the most naughty in the class, deliberately imitated his mother's vague cry: "Tree...... Umbrella ......", the whole class burst into laughter.

I was sitting on pins and needles, hating my mother so much, hating her for not knowing each other, hating her for embarrassing me, and hating Fan Jiaxi who took the lead in coaxing. While he was still imitating exaggeratedly, I grabbed the stationery box in front of me and threw it at him, but Fan Jiaxi dodged it, he rushed forward and grabbed me by the neck, and we fought.

I was small, not his opponent at all, and I was easily pressed to the ground by him. At this time, I only heard a long howl of "whoosh" from outside the classroom, and my mother flew in like a hero, grabbed Fan Jiaxi, and dragged him outside.

It is said that madmen have great strength, and it is true.

My mother lifted Fan Jiaxi, who was bullying me, into the air with both hands, and he was so frightened that he cried and called his mother, and a pair of chubby calves kicked and kicked in the air.

The mother ignored him, and actually threw him into the pond at the entrance of the school, then clapped her hands and walked away indifferently. I was so frightened by my mother's behavior that I forgot to call for help.

On that day, all the teachers were in a meeting in the principal's office, unaware of what was happening here. Fortunately, the master chef of the school cooked the rice and fished Fan Jiaxi out of the pond, and the naughty egg was bruised from the cold, and there were hanging injuries on his body, and he was sent to the health center by the teachers who arrived later......

My mother caused a big disaster for me, but she acted like she was fine. In front of me, my mother regained her timid demeanor and looked at me flatteringly.

I understood that this is motherly love, and even if she is insane, mother's love is sober because her son has been bullied by others.

At that time, I couldn't help but shout: "Mother! "This is the first time I have called her since I could speak, and my mother was shocked, looked at me for a long time, and then blushed like a child, grinned, and smiled stupidly.

On that day, our mother and son went home with an umbrella for the first time. The mother's legs whirred and vigorously on the muddy road, and the mud was splashed everywhere.

I told my grandmother about this, and she was so frightened that she fell on her chair and hurriedly called my father back.

As soon as my father entered the house, a group of middle-aged men with knives and sticks broke into my house, indiscriminately, and smashed the pots and pans to pieces, and the house seemed to have a nine-magnitude earthquake.

Fan's father pointed at his father's nose viciously and said, "My son is mentally ill and is now lying in the health center." If your family doesn't come up with 1,000 yuan for medical expenses, I'll set the house on fire. ”

1000 pieces? Dad only has 50 yuan a month! Looking at the murderous Fan family, Dad's eyes slowly burned red, he stared at his mother with a very terrifying gaze, and quickly untied the belt around his waist with one hand, and hit his mother with a split head.

Again and again, my mother was like a rat in a panic, and like a prey that had run into a dead end, jumping and hiding helplessly, and the terrible screams she made and the sound of the belt pumping on her body, I will never forget for the rest of my life.

In the end, the head of the police station came to stop his father's violent hand. The result of the mediation is that the two sides have losses for each other, and the two do not owe anything, and whoever makes trouble again will be arrested!

The police station has absolute authority in the countryside, after the Fan family left, Dad looked at the house full of broken pots and pans, and then looked at the scarred mother, he suddenly hugged his mother in his arms and cried bitterly, saying: "Crazy woman, it's not that I insist on beating you, I don't want to beat you, this matter can't go to the ground, we have no money to compensate others." It's all the fault of the poor family! ”

Dad looked at me again and said, "Shu'er, you must study hard and go to university." Otherwise, we will be bullied for the rest of our lives! ”

I nodded sensibly. Since then, my reading can be described as "playing with life".

In the summer of 2000, I was admitted to high school with excellent grades, but my grandmother, who had been ill from hard work, unfortunately passed away, and life at home became even more difficult.

The civil affairs department of Enshi Prefecture classified my family as a very poor family with a monthly subsidy of 40 yuan, and my high school also appropriately reduced my tuition and miscellaneous fees, so I was able to continue my studies.

Since I was living in a dormitory and my studies were so tight, I rarely went home. My father is still working for 50 yuan, and the burden of delivering food to me falls on my mother.

Every time, the aunt next door always helped me fry pickles and greens for me, and then handed them over to my mother to deliver.

The 20-kilometer sheep intestine mountain road was written down by the mother, and she delivered it to me once a Sunday, rain or shine.

It's really weird, she is not crazy at all when it comes to her son. Aside from maternal love, I can't explain how this phenomenon should be deciphered in medicine.

On April 27, 2003, another Sunday, my mother came and not only brought me food, but also more than 10 wild fresh peaches.

I picked one up, took a bite, and asked her with a smile, "It's quite sweet, where did it come from?" ”

The mother said, "I...... I picked ...... "I didn't expect my mother to pick wild peaches, I praised her from the bottom of my heart: "Mother, you are really getting more and more capable." ”

The mother smiled.

Before my mother left, I told her to pay attention to safety as usual, and my mother responded with 'oh oh'. Sending my mother away, I threw myself into the final review before the college entrance examination. The next day, while I was in class, my aunt hurried to the school and asked the teacher to call me out of the classroom.

My aunt asked me if my mother had delivered the food, and I said yes, and she went back yesterday. The aunt said, "No, she hasn't come home yet." ”

My heart is tight, my mother shouldn't take a fork in the road, right? But she has been on this road for three years, so it stands to reason that she can't be wrong.

The aunt asked, "Your mother didn't say anything?" "I said no, and she brought me a dozen wild peaches. The aunt clapped her hands: "It's broken, it's broken, it may be broken on this wild peach." ”

My aunt asked for leave for me, and we walked back along the mountain road, and on the way home there were a few wild peach trees, which had survived because they had grown on the cliffs. At the same time, we found a peach tree with broken branches, and at our feet was an abyss.

My aunt looked at me and said, "Let's go down to the bottom of the cliff and see!" ”

I said, "Auntie, don't scare me, my mother won't ......" Auntie didn't say anything, and pulled me into the valley......

The mother lay quietly at the bottom of the valley, surrounded by some scattered peaches, and she still clutched one tightly in her hand, and the blood on her body had long since coagulated into a heavy black.

I was so grief-stricken that my organs were torn apart, hugged my mother tightly, and said, "Mother, my bitter mother, I regret that I shouldn't say that this peach is sweet, but I want your life." Mother, why didn't you promise me? You haven't had a day of happiness alive......"

My mother will never answer me again, I can no longer hear my son's call, I can no longer bring me food and food, I put my head on my mother's cold face, and cried so much that the stones all over the mountains and fields accompanied me to cry......

On August 7, 2003, 100 days after my mother's burial, a gilded admission letter from a university in Hubei Province flew straight into my house through the road my mother had walked, through the wild peach trees, and through the rice field in front of the village.

With an awe-inspiring expression, I inserted this belated Hongshu into my mother's cold and lonely grave: "Mother, my son is out, have you heard?" You can smile at Jiuquan! Mother..."