When I entered the house, I curled up directly on the balcony, the night gradually swallowed up the whole room, and the lights outside reflected on me, I didn't dare to look up, and tried to bury my head in my curled legs; I didn't dare to turn on the light, I always felt that I couldn't see the light, and I didn't dare to go into the darkness completely, for fear that the only light I had left would be swallowed by the demons in the darkness. Who are the demons? Am I just a living, cold, merciless demon? Do I still need to worry about being devoured?

The room was silent all the year round, only the sound of passing trains accompanied me, people would think it was noisy, but I was used to its non-stop rumbling day and night, but other sounds made me feel noisy, but today I don't know why, I can't hear its rumble, I can't hear anything, my eyes are already swollen from crying, and my head is confused.

"Jingle Bells"

My phone rang, this not loud sound in this dead room is particularly deafening, scared my heart tightened, suddenly raised my head, suddenly felt the world spinning, a day and a night without eating in the stomach, coupled with the hangover of the previous night, made me really nauseous, I exhausted all my strength, stood up against the railing, stumbled towards the mobile phone on the coffee table, wiped the tears on the face with my left hand, picked up the mobile phone with my right hand, it was a text message from my mother, if it was usual, I don't even look at it and ignore it, but today I don't know why, I am so eager to care, I want someone to talk to me, I hope this room is not so silent, I hope that someone still remembers me, I quickly opened.

"Do'er, will you come tomorrow?! Tomorrow is important for mom! I hope to get your blessing! ”

Looking at this information, it was like a needle was pierced in my chest, making my every breath ache faintly, but I had to endure the stinging pain, and I had to pretend to be relaxed. I covered my chest with my left hand and stared at it for a few seconds, and I smiled, coldly. A chill arose from my bare feet, slowly invading my blood from the soles of my feet, my legs began to become numb, my hands trembled slightly, and my mobile phone slipped from the coffee table to a thud; I no longer had the strength to support my body, and I collapsed to the ground.

I cried loudly, and I cried heartbreakingly, and I wanted to cry out my heart, liver, and lungs, because only in this way could I prove that I still felt.

I don't know how long I cried, the darkness completely shrouded me, tears blurred my eyes, the light makeup of the previous day was also washed clean by tears, I only felt that my mouth was dry, and I only felt that even the strength to cry was finally exhausted by me. I'm tired, I just want to get a good night's sleep, I just want to close my eyes forever, and wander in this darkness forever. I groped with my hands for the sleeping pills I usually take (sleeping pills equipped for long-term insomnia), I don't know how many tablets I poured on my hands, stuffed them in my mouth, lifted the remaining half bottle of red wine from last night, and poured it into my mouth violently, pouring it so violently that I almost choked on the medicine. The tears and wine on my face are no longer distinguishable, whatever, I pushed away the things on the coffee table, lay on it gently, closed my eyes, I don't know why, my heart is extraordinarily calm; The pain in my chest slowly faded, my eyes were no longer so swollen, and the blood began to flow at some point, I knew that it was the medicine that made me gradually calm, and I was enjoying the comfort that the medicine brought me, no matter what would happen in the next second, whether it was a catastrophe or a new life, just fine!

The rumble of the train gradually entered my ears, I could hear the noise behind the silence of the city, I could hear the lonely sobs of people at night, I could hear the footsteps of staggering in the streets under the street lamps, I could hear the grief hidden in the hearts of people; Every clamor is the sorrow after the ugliness, every sobbing is the tears of indifference and ruthlessness, every footprint left behind is the stain floating under this filthy society, and every grief is the last groan of helplessness. I know that I am not the only one who is lonely, I am not the only one who is struggling, and I am not the only one who is on the edge of life and death. Now that I think about it, is it still heavy? No one can prove that I ever existed, so how can I abandon it? Perhaps, I am a demon who kills life, but the devil is also kind; Perhaps, I am an indifferent and ruthless iceberg, but the iceberg was also tender like water. My road is only I have walked, and no one can understand the difficulties of every step; Slowly, gradually, there was a force that pushed me on the iceberg road; It's cold, it's cold, it's indestructible, it's my strongest fortress, I'm no longer afraid of loneliness, I can't see the ugliness and beauty of human nature, and I ignore the filth and sincerity, if this can make me quiet, then why not? Quietly, so quietly.

"Kid! Child! Wake up! ”

So gentle, so delicate, so familiar voice; The sound was like the sound of my mother lying on the side of my bed and telling me to get up many years ago. I had imagined a thousand times that I could hear this voice again, and I opened my eyes gently, and there was a vague shadow in the darkness, slowly approaching me. I waited motionlessly for it to come to me, and although I wasn't sure who it was, I wasn't afraid, no bad guy's voice was so soft and warm. Of course my heart longs for her and my mother.

The light of the city sprinkled on my living room, it was not the darkness that I couldn't see my fingers, its outline gradually became clear, I looked at it for a few seconds, and squeezed out a few words from my mouth: "How could it be you, Pattern Tiger?" ”

"It's me, it's time to wake up, kid!" It leaned back to me again, its eyes full of distress and tenderness.

"Why are you here? Is it my dream again? "I still don't know why.

"If it's not a dream, what can it be? Why do you know what to do with such a clear division? ”

I smiled: "Yes, the world is chaotic, what's the point of being so clear?" ”

"Kid, let's go see the stars!"

"Starry sky? There has never been a starry sky in this city! "I didn't cut back.

"Just look up!"

I look up, oh my!

The sky is dyed a deep blue by stars of various sizes, and they light up this dark sky, their light shining with hope and beauty. The summer night breeze gently swept through every inch of my skin, the loose hair fluttered slightly in the wind, and a shallow happy smile hung on my face; My eyes gradually paid attention to the surroundings, and found that I was sitting on the top of the mountain, looking up at a bright starlight, but now there was a dark dead silence, the dark abyss had no end, and my legs had fallen into this bottomless abyss, I subconsciously raised my legs and retreated far away, shivering.

"Is this starry sky beautiful?" The Pattern Tiger stood beside me.

I looked at it and nodded weakly.

"Is this abyss scary?" It looked at me earnestly.

I nodded weakly and didn't speak.

"No one wants to step into a dark world full of sin, and no one doesn't like a bright starry sky."

"But such a beautiful starry sky doesn't belong to people like me!" I interrupted it.

"No matter what kind of person you are, you have the right to be good, it's just your choice, no matter how bad a person is, you have a chance to be redeemed, and the key is, whether you want to or not." The pattern tiger stared at me intently, and I knew it was waiting for my answer.

"Redemption? Can I still be redeemed? No one loves me, no one can redeem me. "I burst into tears, and I couldn't hold them back any longer.

"Of course there are people who love you, it's just that you reject all those who love you; Yes, no one can redeem you but yourself. ”

I don't know what to answer it, but it seems like I understand something, and I don't seem to understand anything. Looking at its gentle gaze and listening to its heartfelt proverbs, I just want to hug it tightly. Leaning against its soft fur, I felt the warmth of a long absence.

I can really feel the splitting headache even in my sleep, this pain hits my internal organs, and of course, the pain also weaves an unexpected dream; It was as if I had lit a firework in my brain, it was beautiful and brilliant, but each firework started from the center and went in all directions of my body, burning every nerve, every drop of blood, down to every inch of my skin. The blood in the veins could not withstand the burning of desire, and began to expand, to the point that there was no room for expansion, and finally, it could no longer withstand this scorching onslaught, and with a bang, it exploded.

A stream of heat slowly flowed out of my nostrils, and the smell of blood soaked into my esophagus from my mouth with my saliva, and my taste buds had already detected its saltiness. The heavy eyelids tried their best to give some light to the chaotic and swollen brain, but it was as if the eyelids were stuck to something, just tightly closed. My chest was full of breath, I felt a dull pain in my chest, my aching brain had lost enough oxygen, my thoughts were at a loss, and I was left like this, no, I needed to breathe another breath of fresh air, I wanted to take another look at the bright starry sky, I, I don't know where the strength in my chest came from, the fresh air entered my body, awakened every cell in me, I don't know how the glue stuck to my eyelids melted, in short, I opened my eyes, and the light passed through the intertwined ice, shining, Bright. I sat up suddenly, the stinging pain in my palm made me have to pay attention to it, I raised my hand, the opening in my palm burst open, but the blood was not spilling, but suddenly a drop of blood dripped next to the wound, and I looked at the blood falling from the sky in amazement.

"Here you go."

A handkerchief appeared in my field of vision, I looked at the handkerchief, looked up again, the rabbit again, and I muttered in disgust: "It's you again!" But actually, I was secretly happy in my heart, and for some reason, I began to look forward to and get used to his presence in my dreams.

"Wipe your nose!" The bunny handkerchief is still on my hand.

I touched my nose with my other hand, it was really bleeding, I picked up a handkerchief and wiped it, I smacked my mouth a few times, and a fishy smell suddenly made me nauseous.

"Why is my nose bleeding so much? Dead rabbit, did you beat me while I was asleep? I said as I wiped my nose.

"I've really never seen someone as unconscionable as you!" The talking rabbit snatched back the handkerchief stained with my blood and carefully wiped its box.

I didn't bother to argue with it, anyway, the bleeding from my nose had stopped, and I looked at the injured tiger next to me, and coincidentally, the tiger also looked at me, and I said with my mouth: "Thank you!" ”

The Tiger didn't say anything, but the way it looked at me wasn't so sharp.

"Come and see! Come and see! The rabbit's noisy voice interrupted my thoughts, and the water serpent dragged its weak head, and the patterned tiger staggered to the rabbit and the box; I also stood up helplessly and walked over to the rabbit.

"Look, the jade pendant is slowly turning!" Rabbits rarely say seriously.

If it's true, it didn't move at all before, why did it start to turn? Several people looked confused.

Suddenly, the rabbit grabbed my injured hand again, squeezed my wound hard, only to hear my "whoop~~" scream, the blood collapsed again, and fell on the jade pendant, I pulled out my hand and scolded: "You dead rabbit, are you crazy?" It hurts! The rabbit ignored me, and I kept barking, and the tiger touched me with its body, motioning for me to look at the box.

I fixed my eyes and saw that the jade pendant was spinning at high speed, and we were all stunned and at a loss, and suddenly, with a bang, the box opened by itself, which startled a few of us. Inside the box was a bag made of red satin, bouncing and moving, and the frequency seemed to be the same as a person's heartbeat. We looked at it, and neither dared to move, and the rabbit looked at me, and I looked at the rabbit, and it seemed to signal me to open; I thought to myself: just a bag, there shouldn't be any danger, I live cautiously in life, my own dreams, ethereal, what can I do? Thinking of this, I stretched out my injured hand and carefully untied the bag, and sure enough, a person's vivid and powerful heart beat regularly; Seeing this, I suddenly felt a little sick to my stomach, and covered my mouth as if I was vomiting; Muttered, "It's disgusting, how can there be a heart?" ”

"Child, is this your dream? It's time for us to ask you! Patterned Tiger said.

"How can I know? The dream is mine, but this, I really don't know! I quickly explained, for fear of what responsibility I would bear.

As we spoke, we saw that the water snake spirit also began to spin at high speed above our heads like a jade pendant, and the eyes of the three of us were successfully attracted by it; When I rotated, I sprayed a little water droplet from time to time, splashing my face, the arc of the rotating circle became smaller and smaller, and the water droplets spilled became less and less, and the speed began to gradually slow down, slowly, slowly stopped, stopped in the middle of the three of us; However, it is no longer the water snake spirit. The water snake spirit spun into a sword: I have no digital concept of length, but what is certain is that this water snake sword is not a meter long, and the handle of the sword is very thin, apparently for women's small hands; I stood up and looked at it carefully: the junction between the handle and the body of the sword was triangular, the outer two points were connected to the body of the sword, and the two sides naturally curved downward to form a heart-shaped shape, and the heart was filled with blue water droplets; The two sides of the heart shape naturally descended from the middle, so there were two hollows between the sword body and the blue heart, which looked like the eyes of the water snake spirit, and the seemingly transparent sword body composed of water, starting from the middle of the two eyes to the end of the sword, vaguely contained a red line, which was easy to understand, and was naturally formed by mixing with my blood; I couldn't help but be fascinated by its beauty, slowly stood up, and gently touched its sword body with my hand, watery and moist; The moment I touched it, its soft liquid form, which began to emanate from what I touched, gradually began to solidify, and finally the entire sword body formed a blue solid exquisite sword.

"Wow!" I only heard the rabbit's appreciative exclamation.

I still can't take my eyes off it, admiring its beauty, after all, how can such a thing be seen in reality? What I didn't expect was that the Water Snake Sword responded to my appreciation, it gradually approached me, scared and overwhelmed me, as it approached, it gradually retreated, the Water Snake Sword saw that I had been avoiding it, it swooped to my back, I not only reacted, it was bounced by it, the body took a step forward, quickly turned back and looked at it again, thinking, we are all in a group, it should not hurt me anymore! So I started standing still, trying to see what it was trying to do! My eyes stared at it in a daze, and the water serpent saw that I did not move, and approached me again, and it was no longer erect, but came horizontally, and the handle of the sword came at me, and with a whoosh, it stretched out the handle to my right hand, which was not injured; This situation made me even more overwhelmed, and I turned my eyes to the talking rabbit and motioned to it: What should I do!?

Damn bunny, spread your hands and look like you're doing it! Helplessly, I looked at the pattern tiger again.

"No one can make decisions for you!" The Pattern Tiger looked at me and said.

Yes, life is your own, every decision needs to be made by yourself, I know what it means to pick up the water snake sword, the water snake spirit incarnated into a sword, that is, I want to take it to defeat the ice armor man, it wants to use its own life to save every living being frozen by ice; In reality, I was alone today because of my cold-eyed friend who broke down and begged for death, and it was only after years of cold-blooded ruthlessness that I ended up alone today, living no different from the walking dead, and now I have to be so cowardly in my dreams? No, this is my dream, I can't live like a mess in reality anymore, cold-blooded and ruthless, no matter what the result is, why not give it a try! I don't want to be alone anymore, I don't want to be betrayed and separated, and I don't want to hide in the darkness forever, huddled and never see the light of day! I grabbed the water snake sword with both hands, and in the direction where the ice armor man left, I used all my strength to slash down, only to see the water snake flash a white light, splitting the frozen ground out of a long road.