When I got home, it was already dimly lit, and each red light seemed to tell a different story.

Na Jintang helped Mr. Wang into the room, and Mr. Wang seemed a little tired after a day of playing. The years have revealed too many vicissitudes and traces on him, he is no longer the young old man Wang, nor is he the old man who holds the power of life and death, he is just a seventy years old man who is rare and benevolent.

Old man Wang, he fell asleep quickly, and the Jintang closed the door very reassuringly.

I waited for him in the garden, because there were so many things I wanted to talk to him about, including everything I had seen and heard today, and some things that I couldn't understand, and everything that had happened today was very strange.

Na Jintang came in a hurry, and he was also tired, because after a day's work today, the company's big and small things have completely occupied it, and he has to spend some energy to be in some household affairs with us.

I saw that his haggard heart sometimes couldn't disturb and make him pay more for me.

Na Jintang stepped forward and lazily hugged me in his arms, stroked my hair, and said gently: "Today in order to thank you for bringing my father to so many places, he is very happy today, he rarely smiles like this, his smile is a very festive thing for him and for us, he has not shown his heart like this for a long time, he has not been like this for a long time, sincerely go outside, thank you, Mao Jiujiu." ”

I replied with a smile: "Today is that I am too willful, I tell you that I can take good care of the old man with my pony and the bodyguard brothers, I think too much, if something dangerous happens at that time, I really don't know how to deal with it, today is completely a very willful thing, I will think more comprehensively in the future, don't think about this matter so simply." "With a hint of guilt, of course.

"We are all a family, you and the old man are the first people in my mind, when the people below tell me that neither of you are at home and there is no news, you don't know how anxious I am in my heart, how worried I am about where you will go in my heart. I know you're worried that you're going to be kidnapped, and I know that I'm going to be able to relax when I see you. I can't stand you guys not having news for a while, I'm really scared. When he could only say this, he held me tightly in his arms, and I could feel his uneasiness, the pain that went deep into the bone marrow.

I put my wrench around his waist, and my mood was a little lonely and uneasy: "You said that the person I saw today would be Gui Fengqi, she really looks alike, she is exactly the same." ”

Na Jintang was a little uncertain: "Are you sure that person is her?" After so much time, 5 years after 5 years is a very big change for a person. But I didn't see the person I just saw, and if I did, I might feel it. ”

Actually, it wasn't me, and I'm not sure how I felt at that time: "Yes, and I didn't see her true face, so I want to find out more about the background of that boss, whether he will be a legendary human trafficker, and if it seems impossible, why did he suddenly come to our orphanage at that time?" The recovery period disappeared from the orphanage at that time? It all felt incredible, and I still can't figure it out. ”

Na Jintang nodded thoughtfully.

I suddenly struggled from him, because there was a question that I was curious about and wanted to ask him, and I didn't really ask him, and I didn't think of so much at the time, but now everything seems to be able to be strung together.

I'm now realizing that the guilt in my heart is something I can't face, and that guilt has been covering my heart like a fog. How I longed to be there in their arms to talk to him. His arms were safe and warm, and with his sneer, I kept my mind clear about everything.

When I say this, I can not only see his eyes, but also want to get some answers and affirmations from his eyes: "When you came to the State Department to look for us, did you really pass by there?" It seems that we are still very lucky, every day that fire will let you meet, if that fire is not there, then we will not die of everything. ”

"Hmm." He didn't say anything more, but replied nonchalantly, "Tell me more about the incident." ”

"It was very hot, and when we went hunting in the mountains, we came back and a bunch of people appeared in our orphanage. I was covered all over my face, and everyone was holding a bow and arrows and a long knife. But Gu Fengqi had already disappeared before we returned, and we only found one pair of her shoes. I felt so uncomfortable saying this that I couldn't help but want to cry.

So I really cried, because he comforted me, and I felt a sense of security in his arms, and I was crying so much that I couldn't control my emotions all of a sudden. It's something that makes me feel very guilty to this day.

Na Jintang took out a handkerchief from his pocket, and he said in a mischievous tone: "Quickly wash your snot, you will soon become a little girl with a long nose, say slowly, I'm not in a hurry to listen." ”

With his comfort, the guilt that I had accumulated in my heart for so many years suddenly collapsed: "I really didn't mean to, I don't know how hungry we were at the time, and we had to fight for three meals a day every day, often without anything to eat for two or three days." Everyone was so thin and hungry that they were like monkeys, and I was the only one leading them in the whole orphanage, I was only 16 years old, and I wanted nothing, what could I do, I didn't do anything. And these guys just look at me every day with pitiful eyes, as if I am an all-powerful person. In fact, I was very scared at the time, when I found out this truth, I often couldn't sleep at night on the Internet, couldn't sleep at night, in order to manage them, for everyone to unite to fight against this snow disaster, if any of us collapsed, then this snow disaster will be wiped out. There is no way, no way back. ”

I was crying and snorting, and he was next to me to help me wipe my tears, looking at me very tenderly, with encouragement. The look in my eyes made me say the most depressed thing in my heart.

I like me very much at this time, I don't know if to give it to me, but I told him the darkest side of my heart, because I was afraid that he would look down on me when I said it.

I never had the courage to say what I wanted to say.

But one of his words made me courageous: "Hunger and natural disasters are a very terrible thing, and you were so young at that time, no one took you out of that snow disaster, and no one at that time could show that it was impossible for anyone to be fearless, more often than not, it was the most selfish side of people, which is nothing in line with human nature." ”

I looked up at him suddenly, and I was very confused, and asked him, "Really?" Is that really the case? Were people selfish at that time? ”

Na Jintang smiled and said, "At that time, you were just like children, and you hadn't made a decision about adult behavior at all. It's very good to be able to do that, you know that during the war~strife, there are more cruel and selfish things that you hear and think, and you don't care about what you think, it's just mediocrity. My sister, what you did in that era should be a brave man, a brave little girl. ”

Listening to him say that, I hope to really believe what he said about the theory of the brave.

He continued to look at me with encouraging eyes.

I hesitated for a moment, I decided to open up the things in my heart, this is to suppress me for too many years, and the more depressed mood is just a heart disease that I can't let go: "That's why I really shouldn't do this?" I know that it is not easy for everyone, and everyone has reached the physical limit. But in order to survive, I want to treat them like animals and let them work. They didn't want to do it, I really wanted to whip them, and one night Gui Fengqi said that she wanted to come to Shanghai, and I was very angry and slapped her hard. Yes, she was inciting others to disrupt the team, and I was really hard at the time, and I hit her straight to the ground. ”

I said this sentence in one breath, I felt that you were so relaxed, these words have been suppressed in my heart for too long, it is like making a big mountain, crushing me out of breath, I quickly finished my next sentence: "I thought in my heart at the time: let her go, in the future, we will have one less person to eat, we don't have to bear so many burdens, everyone can eat a little more, I still have some such calculations in my heart." ”

Najin Tang looked at me quietly, and there was a trace of wave in his eyes, as if I was telling a prosaic story. The way he looked gave me some confidence: "Really, that's what I thought at the time, I thought that if he left, we would have one more person's rations, and I really hope that she will go as fast as possible, and it is better to disappear in front of my eyes immediately." I also secretly thought, Amitabha, such as Bodhisattva and so on. Am I too selfish, is it because of my selfishness that she suffers these things? ”

I hurriedly grabbed the sleeve of the brocade hall, my expression was very excited, I hope he can understand my unspeakable pain, my mood is completely like a clown who has been exposed to the world in broad daylight, I am even a little embarrassed to look up at him. I don't know what he's going to think of me now.

Najin Tang stroked my joke and said, "It's just a normal thing, you're a very brave little girl." You know? If many people encounter your situation at that time, they may not have the courage to live, let alone carry it with so many brothers, thinking about how they can successfully escape and try all possible ways to survive. At that time, people were selfish, you must have just thought, but you didn't do it, my brave little girl, let Ma Liu, why are they so obedient to you, and they all treat you as a cat in their minds? ”

I lifted my tear-stained face and asked him, "Isn't it because my fists are fiercer than theirs?" ”

When that Jintang heard my words, he couldn't help but look up and laugh, he was completely crazy with laughter, looking at his smile, I was a little annoyed, I wanted to beat him with my fist, and dared to make fun of me so boldly.

He stroked my hair slowly and said urgently, "Ouch, my cat Jiujiu, you are really my little cutie." If they are afraid of your fists, will they not be able to beat you alone, and won't they all come into battle to beat you? No, this is not the final reason. ”

"And what is their reason?"

"Think about it for yourself."

"Because I've done them enough good?"

"That's just part of it, it's not the most important part."

"Because I'm as beautiful as a flower? Alluring the city and the country? The flower of the sunken fish and the wild goose? ”

The brocade laughed like a tsunami again, and when I saw him laughing so leisurely, my heart suddenly became angry, and I wanted to stretch out my claws and grab his eyes.

He laughed and gasped and said, "My brave little girl, you are really beautiful as a flower, and this is one of the key points. It cannot be denied that this is true, continue to guess, and what you want to guess is close to the truth. ”

I was a little proud: "It must be because of my intelligence, high art, boldness, boldness, follow me, eat and drink, give me a mouthful of food, and they will drink a mouthful of soup." Of course, they want to get the trick of not working hard, and they don't want to think that if it weren't for my cat Jiujiu, they would have starved to death in the orphanage, let alone think about their current life. You said that he was obedient to me and they were lucky, and that's one of the biggest good points. Look, wasn't that pig's head three chubby by me? Isn't Pony Six giggling every day? Needless to say, a person is not only stupid, stupid mouth, stupid action, give them a bite to eat is their fate, the most pitiful is Niu Ba, just with his pig head, dare not say, he can't go to the sea at all, or I lead them, they can't get out of that mountain at all, for here, they must all obey me, what I say is must, that is, the absolute meaning. Lately, they don't dare to say a word, and if they say no, they will listen to my fists to beat them! ”

That Jintang laughed so much that tears fell, and I also wanted to beat him a little, I don't know, in front of such a powerful him, it is simply an axe, and having the meaning of escape is one of my survival skills. I will never provoke him unless I have to.

His laughter finally stopped, and he took me into his arms, and I said very gently, and in a tone that felt very sincere: "You know what? Cat Jiujiu has a very valuable quality on his body, you are not afraid of heaven and earth. ”