Xu Jingjia's clear voice sounded again: "Although I can't prove the connection between these three things, after these three things happened, I am more and more convinced that what I encountered was not something I imagined.

first

The reason why I was suspended and did not follow the course selection guidelines during my university studies was that I wanted to stagger the course choices of other students.

However, there was a male classmate, I don't know his name, I only know that he was also an associate degree's classmate. After the resumption of classes, I still have overlapping subjects with him every semester, and I didn't think about it.

It wasn't until I wandered outside Qi Zhengping's infirmary for the third time that that person appeared in front of me, that I didn't think it was all a coincidence.

second

On the Monday after meeting Dr. Lu Ruiming, Marvin and his friend also showed up outside the department where I worked. At that time, I was working half-time in the personnel department of the headquarters of a government department, and I only worked in the afternoon. It is true that Marvin came to sign the contract after a successful application, and I also have his information in hand. However, there is no room on my floor for the contract, and the contract is not scheduled for the end of lunch.

third

I saw these two men less than a month apart. At that time, they were all convinced that I was interested in Dr. Qi, and even tried to share articles on Facebook to satirize me. Calling me a paranoid person, I always fantasize that a professor and a doctor will fall in love with me."

Fu Liangtao understood what Xu Jingjia wanted to point out. These three points, whether they are related or not, prove that someone has been in control of her dynamics, and this person is likely to be more than one.

Fu Liangtao felt the water bike float with the waves, and then asked, "So, how do you know that the cyber tracking still exists?" Instead of, temptations and interference from others?

Fu Liangtao's words made Xu Jingjia fall silent. After a long time, Hui Jingjia spoke again: "When I last participated in a small group meeting of the church at the beginning of the year, my mentor mentioned a strange experience with a hair dryer in the toilet.

The words that my mentor said were actually said in 2016 because I heard rumors from my colleagues in charge of personnel in my department at that time. The toilet mentioned in this article was the toilet on the first floor of my workplace at the time.

The guru must have listened to that recording before he said this to test my reaction.

You can check with my colleague and my small group mentor, neither of them is familiar with me and won't favor me."

Fu Liangtao remembered the audio mentioned by Xu Jingjia. On the first day of Pang Jitong's work, he once told Pang Jitong that it was one of the messages he found in Li Bingde's laptop.

As of 2016, Hui Ching-ka did not know Dr. Qi, so the audio could not have been recorded by a private investigator hired by Dr. Qi.

Speaking of this, Fu Liangtao still didn't understand one thing: "If the attitude of your friends has long made you suspicious, in fact, you have had the opportunity to collect evidence very early, why don't you?"

Xu Jingjia didn't answer and asked, "Fu Sir, you have been investigating for so long, what do you think my friends think of me?"

「…… Contradiction?" Fu Liangtao frowned and groaned.

Before the words fell, Fu Liangtao heard Xu Jingjia's faint laughter, and she did not deny Fu Liangtao's statement: "Human emotions have always been complex, and few are as black and white as the characters in it."

Fu Liangtao felt that Xu Jingjia also had some understanding of her friends, because when he inquired about Xu Jingjia's friends, Fu Liangtao found that they had different emotions towards Xu Jingjia, they envied Xu Jingjia for not having a burden of life, but also felt that she had no life experience for the same reason. While they continue to catch Xu Jingjia's faults, they also think that Xu Jingjia, as a friend, should tolerate them and should not not interact with them because of these small things.

Their emotions contain all kinds of girls' small emotions, but there is no fierce love and hate in them.

I only heard Xu Jingjia continue: "For a long time, I thought that they had always hated me very much. Because of this, I have all kinds of doubts about myself, and I have been living in despair.

I feel that the whole world, along with myself, is denying the existence of Xu Jingjia as a person. During my part-time years, I always worked and studied mechanically day and night, sleeping only three or four hours a day, sometimes sleeping less and no social interaction at all.

I have been reflecting on it, but I always can't see where my responsibility lies, and I always feel that my life after this incident is in vain and has no meaning.

It wasn't until I fell ill that my despair deepened. Because I feel like I've been deprived of the opportunity to hold on.

I don't think about it, but in fact, this disease isolates all the things that affect my emotions, and it also allows me to really reflect on myself."

Hearing this, Fu Liangtao remembered that when he met Xu Jingjia in the Holy Church some time ago, Xu Jingjia had mentioned that he was also responsible for this matter.

"In the past, I only lived in my own world, and I didn't take other people's feelings to heart, and I didn't know how to restrain my edge.

Zita hadn't given me a chance to reconcile, but I ignored her words. Owen's thing, it's not that I haven't spoken to him, and I'm completely out of responsibility. I shouldn't have dealt with the Zita, Ian, and Owen things in a Buddhist way, thinking that doing nothing would be resolved naturally as time passed.

Although I am not jealous or unpleasant when others are good, whenever I am good, I will always show my happiness in front of others without taking into account the feelings of others who are not as good as me.

And I'm not frank at all, and I often lie to make everyone who knows me think I'm a different person.

Obviously don't want to do things, but after agreeing, he always complains in private, instead of clearly telling the other party how he feels. In the midst of this, while I was under a lot of pressure myself, the people I complained about were actually under no less pressure than I was.

Because Xu Ningzhi, Zhou Muqing and others have always been closest to me, they are also under the most pressure. I watched as their personalities became very different from what they used to be, and they became cautious every time they talked to me, not at all like them.

The most important thing is that I don't take other people's grievances to heart, and I always think that other people's grievances are just like me. However, after experiencing this in the past few years, I realized that not all grievances can be silenced, and it has nothing to do with forgiveness. Because a grievance that has nowhere to say and no one to believe in will become a pain that accompanies life, and this pain permeates all the limbs and bones.

Don't people say, 'What we see in others is ourselves, and the other person is a mirror that reflects us'? Whether it is Marvin and Nina, whom I once believed in, or even all the classmates of the associate degree, as well as Xu Ningzhi, Zhou Muqing and others, in fact, they are my mirrors, and what I see them is actually what people see in the eyes of people.

While Marvin, Nina, and Vanessa were questioning me, why wasn't I questioning them?

When I think about it, I am responsible for every detail that led to this matter, and I can't blame others. The punishment I received was unfair, and if it weren't for that, I might not have seen my problem."

Fu Liangtao was surprised, he didn't expect that the reason why Xu Jingjia insisted on not pursuing it would be like this. After thinking about it, he looked at the changing clouds, and asked, "Is it because of him?"

Xu Jingjia said "um" and said, "Thank him, praise him, make me a better person. He made me understand that I have not lived in vain these days, and he made me see the changes in myself in the details of my life. Because of this, all the unwillingness and resentment in my heart dissipated. Whenever I think of everything I have been through, he is fully aware of it, and his impartiality has become the greatest comfort in my heart.

As long as he is like this, just like that, it is enough."