【1101】

Alas, it's okay when it's too busy

There is a respite

Anxiety and sadness came flooding in

-

【1104】

I saw the clip today, and it's an undergrad kid.

He said I saw all the rough cuts in your class next door, and you should be very proud of this far higher than all of them.

I'm just happy. He said, "How long have you been studying film?" I said, "Let's start studying last year." I bought a camera before I took the application work.

He said, I'm going to spend three times as hard now cutting the film for you, and I feel motivated.

Hahahaha, although I think he's exaggerating, I'm so happy today

People really need some positive feedback in their lives

-

【1117】

It's so tiring

I'm going to shoot again the day after tomorrow, and I don't even have a shotlist

Just a general feeling

orz

-

【1118】

Tired enough to shout for help

-

【1120】

It's zero.

I don't know why I haven't found a chance to cry yet. What I experience every day makes me feel like the next moment of collapse. But I didn't. I haven't. I was at a loss for all the pent-up emotions. I waited for tears as if waiting for a rainstorm that was delayed. The rain has not come, and the weather has been good.

Not long ago I felt very sad, I wrote a list of tomorrow's events for a while, and in a flash, the sadness passed. I counted, and I was sad for eight minutes.

-

【1121】

Everything in the fridge is hairy

Cooking feels very unhealthy

I don't know how long it will take to shoot a story I like

Think about things in the world

-

【1122】

Wake up in bed in the morning

A sentence of help blurted out

I haven't had a weekend in twelve weeks

-

【1123】

Pressure explosion

Yesterday's lunch was hot in the school kitchen

I found myself unconsciously reciting "Born in sorrow and dying in peace"

Laughed for a long time

Really, no, no

The editing room is really the sun and moon in the mountains

I don't even know it's day or night in this building

-

【1127】

Riding home in the car, I was too tired to take my glasses.

I was very confused about why there were still so many things that had not been done, and why there were still so many things that had not been learned. Am I not diligent enough, am I sleeping too much?

It's true that I wasted a day yesterday, lying in bed in a daze, tidying up the house. I didn't think I could do anything about it. But in fact, maybe that's an illusion, maybe I can still do a lot of things as long as I get up.

I went to dinner with my friends today, and she said that she was going to buy cigarettes along the way, because she couldn't hold it anymore, and smoking a cigarette would give her energy. I was shocked because I thought that I had no energy and nothing to do for a day, and I thought how I didn't think that if smoking worked, I would be happy to give it a try.

Alas, I think, sad. I don't want to express negative emotions. Essentially, I feel that things can be solved. Really, in fact, sometimes I wonder where my unwarranted optimism came from. But I really never despaired.

I'm just tired. I was chatting with the taxi driver that day. I said I hadn't had a weekend in three months. He said wow it's so bad. I said not bad, just hard.

Really, just hard, not bad.

But it doesn't make me feel better at the moment.