To dear Angelo

Angelo, tonight is Christmas Eve, the eve of Christmas. Legend has it that many years ago at this time, God sent angels to bring the news of Jesus' birth to every household. The birth of Jesus means peace and good news, and the angels are spreading good news. I wonder if my current actions count as "spreading good news"?

Now, with a candle lit, I am hunched over the desk by the window to write this letter for you, more precisely, a love letter. At this point, I can already imagine the smile on your lips, and my action may seem to you to be just a childish expression of the emotions in your heart. But I would like to make it clear that I am not joking by naming this letter as a "love letter", and please do not deliberately ignore the ambiguity just because the person who wrote the letter is me.

And your good manners and valuable clothes have become the greatest irony in my eyes. Why is it that we are also born as human beings, and we have such a big gap? Why do my mother and I have to bear the malice of the world, while you and my father can enjoy the respect and admiration of the world?

God never loved man, He created man, but He drove him out of Paradise. He stood on a high place, watching the suffering of mankind with a cold eye, but without the slightest mercy. I don't believe in God, and if God really exists, I will rebel against Him, just like the fallen angel Lucifer.

Angelo, after tonight, we've known each other for eleven years. To be honest, my first impression of you was not good, at that time, my mother took me to Shakma's house, and my father and you were waiting for us at the gate. You wore a dark blue dress, which seemed to me at the time to be the most expensive dress in a fairy tale. You have a good upbringing, elegant manners, just like the little prince in the story. But at that time, I had just experienced a crisis, and I couldn't trust anyone but my mother.

Her mother, as the world called her, was dragged out of her home and tied to a cross, and all the onlookers were screaming for her to be burned. My mother and I were like lambs to the slaughter, forced to bear trumped-up charges and had no power to resist.

Angelo, when I was fifteen years old, I danced with a lot of people at my birthday party. But I was a little disappointed that you didn't invite me to dance. If it were you, I'd be willing to jump for one night, even if my legs and feet would be sore the next day.

At that time, you said that if you have a girl you like, you will definitely ask her to dance with you.

Angelo, you don't believe in God either, or you wouldn't pretend to be serious every time you pray.

Angelo, do you remember when I told you the secret of the Brown Elves when I was five years old? Actually, I wasn't completely at ease with you at that time, but I was just taking a risk and trying to trust the world again. I was lucky because the person I met was you. Before I met you, I stubbornly believed that there were no good people in the world, no one worthy of being entrusted with secrets. It was you who told me that there are people in this world who will be desperate to show kindness to others.

Remember the URL

Angelo, I like you, like the bright moonlight, like the clear stream, like the spring breeze, like the first snow in winter.

I like you because your name is like a smile. Every time I hear it, or pronounce it, the corners of my mouth go up, and I think of the blooming rose garden.

When I heard this, I actually felt an indescribable loss in my heart. I didn't know why at the time, but now I understand that I've always liked you.

I don't accept Mr. Jill's heart because I like you. Even though I know you've always treated me as a sister and family, and we're both children of the Shakma family, the chances of being together are slim. But there was always a glimmer of hope in my heart. Desire for a day when there will be no worldly obstacles between us.

At one point I also forced myself to forget my feelings for you and force myself to accept Jill, but then I found out that it was too hard for me to do. Mr. Jill is a good person, and after accepting his heart, he is indeed the right person to marry, but he is not you. He's good at everything, but he's not you.

Angelo, after your mother's accident, you went to the Viscount's house, and I have been worried about you. I happened to learn about your past from Mrs. Chelsea, and then I realized that I didn't know you well enough, I didn't know anything about your past, and I took you for granted as a young master who didn't know the suffering of the world. Angelo, did you treat me well in the first place because we were in the same condition? Once, we all thought of ourselves as outsiders, I lost trust in the world, you lost the family you had so hard to get, we were all outsiders in the Earl's Court.

Angelo, you know what? How happy I was when you objected to me marrying Jill in front of your father. I even came up with the idea that you like me for no reason.

When I was a child, I always liked to hold you and be coquettish, asking you to touch my head, and at that time I liked you or my brother. Slowly, I grew up, and this affection quietly sprouted in my heart. I'm going to keep my distance from you, even though at the time I didn't realize it was because of like. Later, after I understood this intention, the request for your coquettish became my taboo. Because I feel like I'm taking advantage of your gentleness by doing it again, which is just too cunning.

In short, all my thoughts and actions can be expressed with a sentence of "I like you".

I like the way you smile, I like the way you work hard, I like the way you are gentle, I like the way you protect me, I like the way you frown when you read, and I like the way you persuade me not to play in the winter......

Angelo, if Miss Charlotte hadn't gone, would you still be nice to me? Will it accommodate my willfulness? Will you sneak out of the banquet with me?

Please forgive me for asking you these questions. I don't know how, but ever since I realized I liked you, I've been suffering from gains and losses, and I've always thought about messy things. As long as you are in my sight, I can't help but look at you. You may not imagine how happy I feel when we look at each other.

If this heavy snow stops in the middle of the night, I'll sneak this letter into your room and wait for you to find out for yourself.

Dear Angelo, I am very nervous about tomorrow, but I am also very much looking forward to it.

Angelo, it's still snowing outside, and the farmers in my father's field will surely get a good harvest next year. Angelo, if I make a wish tonight, will I get your answer tomorrow?

If this snow falls until tomorrow, I will tell you to your face that I like you and give you this letter.

Angelo leaned her back against Phoebe's tombstone and read her letter again.

He had no tears to shed, and his eyes were as dry as a dry riverbed. Many years have passed since the accident of Count Shakma's family, but Angelo is still the same as back then, but his mental state is like a withered old man.

Your family, Phoebe.

When the spring flowers are blooming, somewhere in the forest, there is a sea of flowers. There are three unknown graves inside, where four people are buried.

The snow didn't stop that night and it continued until the next day, but Angelo didn't wait for Phoebe's confession.

He disguised himself as the most inconspicuous outsider in the county.

He gets Jill and Phoebe's letter from Ed.

After the deal with Miss Su was realized, Angelo disappeared from Shakma's house.

Angelo lost his soul for a few days and disappeared into the land, and no one knew why this stranger suddenly disappeared again, no one knew who he was, and no one knew where he had gone.

A few years later, Angelo came back once. Four roses were offered to these three graves. Then he disappeared again.

In order to help the Count solve his problems, Angelo developed a plan for the villagers in the Earldom to deal with the werewolves. But he never imagined that the werewolf was the earl, and he never predicted that the world would be angry with Lady Athenie and Phoebe.

On the night of the fire at the Earl's Palace, Angelo ran madly into the burning house, but was stopped by the ignorant men who claimed to be righteous.

Angelo leaned against Phoebe's grave and smiled most sincerely. As if Phoebe was still beside him, she threw herself into his arms and asked him to touch his head.

"Phoebe, you're right...... God never loved man, He created man, but He drove him out of Paradise. He stood on a high place, coldly watching the suffering of mankind, but without the slightest mercy......"

Decades later, his face has not changed in the slightest, and Ed the black cat can't help but be surprised to see it.

Ed also died shortly after reuniting with Angelo. It departed on a quiet moonlit night, lying beside the tombstone, building itself its final home with roses.

Phoebe, I'm sorry, I still couldn't protect you......

I'm sorry, Jill, but I can't do what you want me to ask in your heart to be "all well......

He knew every sentence of the letter so well that he could even recite it fluently.

He looked up at the sky, his eyes still as gentle as water. It's just that he is no longer the teenager he used to be. He was alone, wandering around, looking everywhere, crawling around in the muddy world for decades, lonely for decades, and escaping for decades. But the curse he was carrying did not pity him for what happened to him.

"Phoebe, what should I do, I seem to have left this world...... But I was denied the right to leave this world......"

"Phoebe, God really exists, He has punished me and cursed me with eternal life......"

Mother, I'm sorry I made an unforgivable mistake......

Father, I'm sorry that it was my negligence that caused your misfortune......

"Phoebe, I miss you so much......"

"Phoebe, I've been looking for you......"

That afternoon, Angelo spoke to the tombstone for a long, long time, even if he didn't reply, even though he knew it was just self-deception.

"Phoebe, even if you are no longer alive, I will still go to you, even if it takes decades, hundreds of years, I am willing."

Angelo did it, and he managed to reach another world, but it cost him a lot.