"It's almost ten o'clock, aren't you going back? I guess I'll have to go to school tomorrow. I asked Lu Antong and Chen Zhiyun, who were eating easily.

"It's only ten o'clock, it's still early, what's the hurry, let me bake a few more chicken wings, this sauce is really delicious." Chen Zhiyun looked relaxed.

Lu Antong didn't make a sound, his right thumb slid the phone screen, holding a glass of ice Coke in his left hand, his teeth gritted the straw, as if he was slowly sucking blood, and the red Coke can seemed to be the color of blood, cold blood, cold straws, cold lips and teeth, I suspect that Lu Antong's own blood is also cold, I recall the cold air he exhaled in my ears just now.

Could it be that he is already dead in the water? So he doesn't have a temperature, and he doesn't have a soul, I gave birth to such a grotesque idea, but I dispelled it vigorously, how could it be, Aoi Yue said that he had been sent to the hospital, and he woke up, and now there is a big living person in front of him, I said to myself.

"Auntie, you're peeking again, I know." Like a child, Chen Zhiyun smiled at me and said, "Come on, let's roast chicken wings together." He beckoned, like a spirit.

In order to prevent him from continuing to talk nonsense, I took a barbecue fork and forked a chicken wing, and made it next to Chen Zhiyun, and he smiled with satisfaction.

"I said, don't you have to do your homework?" I asked Chen Zhiyun as I flipped the chicken wings.

"It's not that I don't want to do it, put it in front of me, I'll be sleepy for a while, just copy Lu Antong's tomorrow morning." Chen Zhiyun looked thoughtful, "Besides, I can't keep up for a long time, what homework do I do." ”

I didn't know what to say for a moment, so I turned the wings carefully and watched the fire. Chen Zhiyun seems to have started the mode when I am a tree hole, as if to reveal his heart to me, and drunk people are especially unguarded.

"Auntie, although you see me giggling and happy, I'm not happy at all.......," he leaned next to me and whispered, "As soon as the others listen to the class, I just stare at the teacher, and I can't understand what he's saying, and then I don't listen either, so as not to make myself unhappy, the feeling of being sleepy, annoying, and not understanding and feeling stupid, very bad." ”

His wings seemed to be burning, so he picked them up, turned them over and continued to talk to me.

"But in fact, it doesn't matter, I went to play football and my mood got better again, I really want to be able to play football every day in the future, play football for a lifetime hahaha~~" He smiled again, "Everyone has what he likes to do, why can't everyone do what he likes to do?" Staying in the classroom for so long every day, the best weather is to stay indoors to listen to the lessons that I don't understand, and I am in a hurry to eat and go back to self-study, but I didn't go to self-study, hahaha you see that everywhere is lively and sparkling at night, walking on the road, and the mood is good, don't we live just to be in a good mood hahahaha"

There was a sour feeling of weakness in my chest, because the cake was so big that not everyone could eat it, and I wanted to answer him like this, but I found that I couldn't say it, and I was also an unhappy adult, and my answer was obviously not the standard answer.

"Auntie, your shop looks very good, you can play songs with air conditioning, and you still have barbecue or something." He showed me eight teeth, "Are you still hiring?" ”

Seeing such a stupid and serious Chen Zhiyun, I couldn't help laughing, "It's not good to sit comfortably in class, do you want to come to work hard?" I quipped.

"Auntie, do you work hard?" Chen Zhiyun asked.

I shook my head: "It's not hard, here." ”

"That's it, it's definitely a good place." Chen Zhiyun seems to have come to a conviction, and my words don't seem to be able to shake him, "Come on, come on, take out your phone, and add a friend." ”

I had no choice but to do it, so he finally got his wish, and then sat there biting his chicken wings and said to me, "By the way, Auntie, I don't know your name yet, or I'll just note Auntie." ”

My face was darker than coal, and I stared at him, but he didn't seem to intend to ask my name.

"Then it's decided, the aunt in the convenience store hahaha." He didn't seem to see my black face at all, and was talking to himself, so I shook my head helplessly and ate my wings.

"By the way, Auntie, didn't you say that you also worked as a teacher? Do you think there is salvation for people like me? He asked this question without thinking.

The chicken wings solidified in my mouth.

"What?" I wondered.

"Forget it, it's okay." He took the subject back again, and then took a big bite on the chicken wings, and when he was about to finish his bite, he got up and went to get new raw chicken wings to roast, this time he took four forks, and lined them up like a night stall, and his face was red and the wings squeaked and agitated.

Chen Zhiyun connected a small Bluetooth speaker like a wooden box with his mobile phone, and smoke and singing rose by the campfire, and the exotic Chinese dialect and ethereal tunes were also like smoke, lingering into the night.

At eleven o'clock, the two of them stepped on the long street filled with a fine mist in the faint moonlight, and the two ghosts came and went now, as if this was just a post station, so that they could rest and regain their blood a little.

I sat on a bench in front of the glass window, leaning against the glass, cold and cold, this snowy glass also has a temperature like snow.

I looked at the backs of the two in a daze, Chen Zhiyun's steps were frivolous and cheerful, and Lu Antong's pace was much slower in comparison.

"Is there anything you'd like to ask?" Su Shun's voice sounded in his ears.

I turned my head, Su Shun looked at me, his ears were a little red after drinking, his cheeks were also a little red, and the corners of his eyes, as if they were dyed by a bonfire, psychedelic and intoxicating.

I frowned slightly to remember what I wanted to ask, but I didn't know if it was because I had drunk or if I was confused by the night fog that swirled around me, and for a moment I just felt vague, and I shook my head, as if my body was about to stagger, and I was about to fall.

"I can't seem to remember what I want to ask?" I'm honest about what I think.

Su Shun smiled, patted my head lightly, and sat down beside me.

"Is this head down? Would you like to reboot it for you? Su Shun raised his eyebrows and asked, observing me seriously, his eyes seemed to reflect me, and I tilted my head and looked into his eyes seriously. I look so strange that I don't even recognize myself.

"I want to reboot too? It's better to restart it all, all of it. "The messy and fragmented thoughts in my mind are displayed in front of Su Shun." Why is it so difficult to be happy? Why does everyone around you look so happy? They seem to have infinite possibilities, infinite hopes, what game doesn't work, just change the game, can it really be changed? But I feel like I'm running out of options...................................................................."

For a moment, the surging brain seemed to explode, flickering through a series of unhappy fragments for more than 20 years, and those feelings of failure to get their wishes were like huge horror cracks, frozen rivers in winter, I don't know what force to suffer, or if I collapsed internally, slammed, and the ice shattered.

My vision was a little blurry, and my throat was choking.

A little rough fingers gently wiped away my tears, and my vision was clear again, and Su Shun's face was very clearly in front of my eyes.

"Some people laugh when they're drunk, but you seem to cry when you're drunk." Su Shun's soft voice fell into my ears.

I pursed my lips and smiled bitterly, but more tears fell on Su Shun's hands.

He gently soothed my head, then let me lean on his shoulder, and I leaned up obediently, as if my strength was all gone, and I needed to lean on.

He didn't say anything like don't cry and be strong, he just let me lean on, and we snuggled up like this, and the curvature of his shoulders seemed to be just right, and he took all my weight off him, and I felt a lot more relaxed, he was like a magical healing instrument. As soon as I leaned in, I was afraid that he would disappear, and I wondered what to do if he disappeared.

I stared at the night sky in a daze, and the moon was blurred.

"Poor misty, slim, it must be very uncomfortable to not be able to see the road clearly." His voice was soft, like a lullaby.

But it made me cry even more, and I leaned on his body and sobbed, tears and tears.

I buried myself in his shoulder, tears soaking his T-shirt, and I don't know if my tears were hotter or if his body temperature was hotter.

His shoulders are more comfortable than pillows, and I have this thought in my heart, which is much more comfortable than crying in a pillow, and the sound of his heartbeat is quietly accompanied.

Gradually, I cried tired, leaning on Su Shun groggily, as if I felt him gently summarize my broken hair behind my ears, which made me feel much more comfortable, I got closer to him a little, subconsciously wrapped his hand, as if holding a big cartoon doll, leaning on him, he also let me.

After feeling that this large cartoon doll would not run, I fell into a coma with peace of mind, and my reliable body temperature supported me to cruise in my dreams.

It seems that there is also a night in the dream, and it is also this fantasy convenience store, or me and Su Shun.

I confused and said to him, "It would be nice if we stayed all the time tonight." ”

"I've always been here, like the moon, which I can't see during the day, but I've always been here." He seemed to answer me, I don't know if he answered in the dream or outside the dream.

But in this dream I smiled sweetly, and I guess I smiled like this outside the dream.

------------------------------------------------------- splits -------------- collapses ------------------- shatters------------------------------

25 July 2020

A ghost is about to leave, but hopefully time will stand still tonight forever.

How nice that would be.

The wishes of both humans and ghosts are so far away.