This year's Chinese New Year is really busier than in previous years, and I think it is probably because college students do not have the pressure and burden of studying in the past, and the vacation time is also a little more than a little more than the previous study days. So the family took me to basically all the relatives who had not been there before, and every time I walked to the house of a relative, I basically didn't know what I should call the owner. My parents still pointed to me one by one and said that this is who is me, who is me, although I knew it at the time, but unfortunately as soon as the front foot walked, I forgot about it after a while.

It's no wonder that there are so many and complex terms of interpersonal relationships in China that to be honest, I haven't even figured out what my neighbors are called. You have to ask this, if you don't know your relatives who haven't seen it, you can say that you don't know, how can you even know the neighbors who often meet don't know, it's too fake!

Let's explain it this way, in my hometown, my generation is considered to be above average, with grandparents, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. When I see old men in my seventies and eighties, I usually call them brothers. There are only a few seniors who are older than me, which is not difficult to remember, but I don't know very well about those middle-aged people. Do I call them uncle, or do they call me uncle? So I usually wait for them to call first, and then I'm sure, otherwise I'll just stare dryly. Again, on the eve of my departure from home and heading to school.

It was a busy New Year, and although I stayed at home to eat and drink well, I was still very eager to return to the vast and free place of the university campus, so I booked a bus ticket to the school early. After 9 o'clock in the morning, I thought that my house was a long distance from the train station, so my father asked someone to drive me to the train station.

This day is the thirteenth day of the first lunar month, although it is the end of the new year, today there are relatives to pay New Year's greetings. So my dad gave me the details, then took my luggage and delivered me to the door, and then went back to prepare the food for the guests at noon. I arrived at the waiting place at the scheduled time.

What I didn't expect was that the person my dad was already waiting there, it was a young man. I was pondering what my name was for the person in front of me, but he smiled and said, "Boboer (the meaning is the same as uncle.) You're coming. ”

As soon as I heard it, I knew that I was the elder of this person, so I quickly said, "Eun, I didn't expect you to come so early, have you been waiting for a while?" ”

He smiled and said, "I also just arrived, and I was about to smoke a cigarette and wait for you to come, but I didn't expect you to come." How about one? As he spoke, he handed me a cigarette.

I quickly shook my hand and said, "Thank you!" I haven't touched this thing yet. ”

So this junior of mine put the cigarette in his hand back into the box, and said, "Young man, you should learn to spread all these cigarettes and alcohol." ”

Smoking is a common practice for people of their generation, even something that goes deep into the bone marrow, and they think that when a boy goes out, this cigarette is a stepping stone. You can get closer to people you don't know in an instant, and it has become the first choice for communication. Of course, as a new generation of young people, we naturally do not scoff at this habit, but we also stay away. So he said politely: "I don't touch this thing, after all, smoking is harmful to my health." ”

After hearing this, the man nodded in agreement and said, "That's it, smoking is bad for your health." I've been thinking about quitting this thing for a long time. ”

"You can sprinkle, if you want to quit, you have to quit as soon as possible, and it's better to quit early."

"You see how I look like this, how can I say quit for a while, I can only take my time." As he spoke, he threw the cigarette that had already smoked more than half of his hand on the ground, stepped on it and continued: "Stop chatting here, let's get on the train early, so as not to get stuck in traffic on the road and catch the train to Beijing." ”

I nodded and said, "Yes! ”

As I spoke, he was about to help me put my luggage in the car, so I quickly grabbed the luggage and said, "I'd better do it myself, I can handle the things." ”

The man smiled, then went back to the car, ready to start it. I followed suitably and put my luggage in the car, and then I followed into the car.

Unlike before getting into the car, this person drove intently after getting in the car, and didn't talk to me much about it. A serious person should be like this, and seeing him like this, I suddenly felt a sense of solidity in my heart. Because of this, I fell asleep in the car before I knew it, and when I was woken up, I was already at the train station. Before leaving, this junior also told me some things, and I also expressed my gratitude to him, and then agreed to enter the train station.

"As a swordsman, in the face of the unscrupulous snoring and drooling of the uncle next to me, I can only silently chatter, senior, please respect yourself. Then I took out my little fruit knife, and the cold light flashed to my eyes, but my eyes did not blink at all, and then silently peeled the apple in front of me! "When I typed here, I had some silent pride in my heart, and then I published this statement.

I threw down my phone and launched a final offensive against my long-coveted last apple. As a swordsman, the level of apple peeling is naturally not a problem, and after a while, the apple is only the tempting flesh as I said. It just so happened that I noticed the drool that had been hanging for a long time from the uncle next to me, and finally couldn't hold back the drip and happened to drip onto the uncle's hand. Perhaps feeling the slightest coldness, the uncle woke up from his sleep. Realizing that there was still a trace of residual saliva hanging on the side of his mouth, he quickly wiped the things around his mouth.

"Young man, take your sword!" When he saw me eating apples, he couldn't help but want to eat some fruit. I have this experience, that is, the person next to me takes something and then eats, and the food is very sweet, and you will unconsciously drool when you think of that taste, and you want to eat it. I'm sure this uncle is for this reason, as for why he thinks about it, it's to think about the uncle's vigorous salivary secretion glands just now, and how he can endure such a temptation.

As I thought so, I handed my knife to the uncle next to me with a smile on my lips. The uncle saw my smiling face, and for some reason, although he felt a little uncomfortable, he also took the knife in my hand. Uncle Jian took the knife and looked at it, and then unconsciously came out with a sentence: "Good knife!" Then the next move shocked me and the mother and daughter who were doing it.

Uncle took my knife and praised my knife for being a good knife. Suddenly, he took the knife to his mouth and licked it with his tongue. The air froze at this point, and I was deeply thundered by this action. After about 1.980 seconds, the uncle made a very painful appearance, and tried to make a sound with the last strength in his mouth: "Poisonous!" Then he died.

Okay, okay, this exaggerated plot is exactly what I imagined. Just as I was handing over the knife, I happened to think of the funny clip of the Japanese man licking his own poisonous knife, and I unconsciously connected with the uncle next to me along this picture. Contrary to my assumptions, the uncle simply took the knife, and then flatly peeled the apple in his hand.

It doesn't matter if you cut it, looking at the uncle's simple operation, the skin of the apple has not only not been broken from beginning to end, but the size and width are almost uniform, and the flesh on the skin is very shallow, which makes me have to be a little shocked. Then silently looked at the angular apple in my hand, I had to take three bites and make a mouthful, and quickly solved the apple in my hand. Then he quickly took the water from the table and swallowed the remaining residue into his mouth.

The train departed unhurriedly and at the specified speed to the destination, and it was still more than an hour's drive from Beijing West. At this time, I had a slight urge to urinate, but in order to avoid too much trouble, I was still going to use the toilet before the train arrived. So I got up, took my phone and flashed down the aisle, and moved to the toilet in the carriage. Unfortunately, the doors of the two toilets in this carriage were closed. I thought to myself that I was too lazy to move, so I waited here for the people inside to come out and then go in. What I didn't expect was that this decision at that time made me pay a heavy price for it.

Playing with the mobile phone unconsciously time flies, I have been waiting in front of this toilet for about ten minutes, I just reacted to how the people inside have been on the toilet for so long and have not come out, thinking of this, I don't know what the situation is, but I think that since I have waited for so long, I don't care about waiting for a minute or two, even if the people inside come to the tuba, it is estimated that it is about to be solved. With this in mind, I decided to continue waiting in front of this toilet.

What I thought of was that I waited silently for about ten minutes, and there was no one inside. As a person with an impatience, for someone who has already convinced himself once, I am now very impatient to wait, and I feel very angry! Then I said to myself, I want to see what kind of person will come out in a while, I want to see what this forced person looks like, so that he can go to the toilet for so long.

Time passed minute by minute, and I didn't know how many times I scolded the people inside, and until all the words I scolded were used up, the people inside still didn't look like they were going to come out, and then I saw that the people in the toilet in the next carriage were going back and forth several times, and even the people who were waiting for me later went into the toilet. You say that I have encountered this situation, who can not be in a hurry to get angry, I am now on the tip of the horns, once again resisted the temptation of the toilet next to me, stamped my feet and counted the people who were anxiously waiting for you to come out.

Six hundred seconds, I counted six hundred seconds, which meant I waited ten minutes, and I thought that if I had vented my anger at that time, it would have been like a volcanic eruption. At this time, the time before the train arrived at Beijing West Railway Station was getting less and less, but the next passing train cleaning aunt's behavior completely broke me down, making me feel dumb and unspeakable.

The cleaning aunt passed in front of me with a bag. I am also preparing to let her pass in front of me. She stopped in front of me abruptly, then turned to the toilet I was staring at, then took out her key and opened the locked toilet. The operation went smoothly, and I was still wondering, why didn't this aunt dare to open it without being sure that there was someone inside? However, as the toilet door opened, I felt my heart pluck cold, and what I saw at the time was that it was empty! Do you know how hard it hit me at the time?

Seeing my aunt clean up the inside, and then coming out and about to close the door, I quickly stopped and expressed my desire to go to the toilet, and the response was that the toilet was broken and unusable, and asked me to go to the toilet next to it to solve it. When I heard the news, tears fell from my eyes, and it was a great blow to me, because it was a wrong choice for me to wait from the beginning. But the toilet still had to be used, so I had to move to the toilet next to it.

With a frustrated body, I was about to open this working toilet, but at this moment, the train attendant said in an apologetic tone: "Hello sir, I'm sorry!" The train is about to arrive at the station and the toilet can no longer be used. ”

I stared at the person in front of me with my eyes open, and I couldn't say a word, I watched him. Then I heard him say, "I ask for your understanding for the inconvenience." After saying that, he ruthlessly locked the toilet in front of me with the key, and then left my sight. A series of blows almost made me, a seven-foot man, unable to withstand it, and I was speechless to the extreme, and my heart was cold to the extreme. Not only because of my axis, but also because I began to choose the wrong direction, and I couldn't see the situation clearly and respond in time, which led to the current situation, so I learned a great lesson from this incident.

What else could I say about it, and I had to go back to my place in a sullen mood. Fortunately, Beijing West Railway Station will arrive in a short time, and the end of the one-day and one-night train journey can be regarded as a little comfort to me. By the time the train had come to a complete stop, I had already packed my luggage and waited in the aisle. The crowd slowly pushed forward, and it was another few minutes when it was my turn to get out of the car. I dragged my luggage and tiredly followed the location of the sign to the subway entrance inside the train station.

As a capital, Beijing is certainly also a transportation hub city, and it is natural that there are many people in the station. Now I have two choices in front of me, one: if you want to get on the bus quickly, you have to take the bus; Two: If you want to avoid trouble, you can only choose to take the subway. For public transportation, I was not used to using mobile phone maps at that time. I just remember the first time I came to Beijing West, and my eldest brother took me on the route, but I couldn't be sure, so I had to give up this choice.

Since I chose the second method, I had to obediently line up at the back of the queue that had already twisted back and forth several times. Although it has not yet passed the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, the weather in Beijing has gradually warmed up at this time, and the crowd at the station at this time is congested and noisy, I just feel that it is very hot now. Bursts of heat rushed up my face from my neckline, and I felt itchy on my face for a moment, but there were too many things on my hands, and there were so many people, that I didn't even dare to carry out a simple scratch, so I had to endure the pain while continuing to wait, the only hope was that the team could move forward quickly, so I could buy a ticket, and then scratch it to my heart's content.

After about 40 minutes of being in this state, there was finally one person left who was about to buy a ticket for me. In front of me was a middle-aged man with a large denim duffel bag, and after several unsuccessful attempts to put his 10 yuan into the machine to get a ticket, he scolded the machine. Originally, the people behind were already impatient to wait, and when they saw this situation, they hurriedly urged, yes, the eldest brother who was anxious if he didn't come was even more anxious, so he hurriedly changed to a ten-yuan card to continue the previous attempt.

Murphy's theorem says that the more you fear, the more likely it will happen. Sure enough, after exchanging the banknotes, the eldest brother still couldn't buy a ticket. The voices of the people in the back complaining became louder and louder, which made the people in front even more anxious.

"Here, let me try!" I put down the box in my hand and patted the big brother on the back. When the eldest brother heard this, he quickly turned his head, and said with an embarrassed smile that leaked out of his vicissitudes: "I really can't figure out what this machine is about." With that, he handed me the money in his hand.

I took the money, wiped it vigorously, and then threw the money into the machine. This time, the machine didn't make any more mistakes and successfully exchanged the ticket. When the eldest brother saw that the ticket came out, he said happily: "It's really weird! The machine also recognizes people! Then he took out the ticket and said to me very gratefully, "Thank you, little brother." ”

I smiled and said, "It's okay! The eldest brother happily turned around and walked to the entrance of the station. The people in the back probably resented me again and began to complain. Expressionless, I began to exchange my own ticket and walked towards the entrance without twisting my head.

It was smooth to get into the station, but just as I was down the stairs, the subway came. I don't know if this is good luck or bad luck, because I want to go to the toilet before getting on the train and get rid of my stall in the subway station that I haven't liberated on the train. I scanned the waiting crowd, and I shook my head and said to myself, "Wait, I'll get on when I get off the bus."

Didididi, there was already a sound of closing the door, and I hurriedly rushed into the subway. It takes about half an hour to reach Guomao from Beijing West Railway Station, plus the time to buy tickets and wait just now, it is more than an hour. And with it, my urinating is getting thicker and thicker. After remembering the sound of the prompt station at the International Trade Center, I quickly got off the bus and went around to find a toilet.

Following the prompts, I unconsciously went out of the subway entrance, but I still didn't find the toilet. At this time, if not my luck, I saw that the bus to my school was about to stop at the platform. If you want to miss this car, I guess I'll have to wait at least forty minutes. So I checked my status: I could still endure school. So I got on the bus to school without saying a word.

The drive of more than an hour and 40 minutes was extremely painful. As long as I encountered a slight delay on the way, I immediately began to curse in my heart. Along the way, I instilled a powerful mind in myself, while holding my lower abdomen, so that I was able to hold it until I arrived.

As soon as I got off the bus, I rushed to my dorm building. The pedestrians on the road saw me, thinking that I was being pursued by the enemy, but they were still eager to run to freedom. I've had so much to worry about, victory is just around the corner, and I've already seen the door to my dormitory.

I hurriedly quickened my pace again, and happened to meet a familiar figure in front of the building. "Brother Zhuang, ouch, you're here!" The fat man greeted me with a smile. But the color is still in my own footsteps at all, and I said with a blue face: "I am your father!" After saying that, he opened the door and rushed directly to the toilet on the first floor, leaving only a fat man with a hoodwinked face, and he didn't know why.

I pulled the suitcase on one side and quickly unbuttoned my pants with the other, then stood in front of the urine trough and spewed out a stream of liquid with a pressure of 3 atmospheres. Refreshing~! At this point I felt as if the whole world was mine, and the feeling was simply indescribable.

After this one-of-a-kind experience, I felt a sense of collapse from all my strength, and I almost fell to the ground without standing still. Fortunately, the door of the toilet was close to the urinal trough, which fully supported my physical body. At this time, a buddy came in, and he saw my state at the first glance as soon as he entered, and as long as I was a normal person in my current state, I would be very confused. This guy looked at me, and I had to stand up, hold on to the door, and staggered out.

The dude still looked like he didn't know why, and then seemed to think of something, and after a moment of disdain, he closed the door and settled his own business. I slowly climbed up to my sixth-floor dormitory with my suitcase, and before I could even step through the dormitory door, I heard a voice coming from inside: "You don't know, you run like something, and walk to the dormitory building without looking back." I was surprised, and immediately followed into the dormitory building, but in the blink of an eye, Brother Zhuang disappeared, I must have seen a ghost! ”

Then came Lan Yu's voice: "What are you talking nonsense about there, hell in broad daylight, you're afraid that you've been driving too much and have hallucinations!" ”

The fat man immediately replied, "It's white, it's true!" I'm sure I saw Brother Strong. The point is that I greeted him, and he didn't say anything and just said that he was my dad! ”

The second brother said with a smile: "Fatty, when you meet, you will say that it is your father, but you think of it, I think you want to be a son too much!" Liu Dazhuang had never entered the bedroom at all. Maybe it's still on the train, I'll ask now."

The fat man made a very aggrieved and firm expression and said, "I will hear Brother Zhuang's voice wrong!" So hoarse standard Southern Mandarin, even with my eyes closed, I dare to be sure. ”

I laughed when I heard this, and then I dragged the box and stood at the door with a wicked smile and said, "Fatty, I'm your father!"

As soon as the fat man heard my voice, he immediately became excited, and immediately turned around and said, "I said you still don't believe me!" Now that Brother Zhuang is here, I should be right! ”

The second brother heard my voice at this time and wanted to stretch out his head, but Lan Yu noticed me before the fat man turned around, and saw the smile leaking from my face, so he immediately grabbed the second brother and said, "Where?" Fatty, can you tell the truth! Where is Liu Dazhuang, I see what kind of hallucination you have again! ”

The fat man was stunned at first, then pointed at me and said to the people in the bedroom, "You are blind! Such a big living person is standing in front of you, and you say that you can't see it, you are two-five-eyed! ”

"Where?!"

The second baby had already understood what Lan Yu meant, and pretended to stretch out his head to look at it and said, "Fatty, where is there anyone!" The door is empty! ”

Lan Yu jokingly continued: "There is no one at all, I'm afraid you are hallucinating again." ”

The fat man continued to point at me and said, "Here and here! Take a closer look! ”

Lan Ruffian took out his mobile phone and said, "Dead fat man, you act so similar!" Look at the message Liu Dazhuang sent me, he is still on the train? ”

Hearing Lan Ruffian say this, I have to admire Lan Ruffian's ability to talk nonsense, the key is that he is really doing such a thing. I almost believed it, let alone the fat man, whose face was so blue that he was so nervous that he even turned his head and looked so scared and so mechanical.

The fat man secretly looked at me with one eye, what could I do at this time, I could only smile wickedly and repeat, and look directly at him. The fat man turned his head with all his strength, and stood in front of the mirror in a daze, his eyes wide open. I could already feel the sweat on his body start to flow.

"Ahh A scream almost resounded through the floor, and the fat man rushed to his bed with flying speed and shouted, "Holy! Then he lay on his bed and shivered.

When Lan Luo and the second brother saw the fat man like this, they naturally achieved their goal, but they were not in a hurry to debunk it. Hurriedly asked the fat man and said: "Fat man, is there something wrong with you, say hell in broad daylight!" Do you really think it's the ghost who committed suicide on our level before? ”

The second brother said bitterly: "That is, it's the 21st century, I don't believe in science, but I believe in ghosts and gods!" It's really alive and going back! ”

The fat man basically couldn't listen to it anymore, so he just avoided in a panic and said, "Don't look for me!" Don't look for me! ”

"Zhuang'er? There you are? When did it arrive? Why stand at the door and not go in? Luppi held a basin and looked at me curiously.

I smiled and said, "Can you see me?" ”

"Nonsense, what the hell?" Luppi didn't know why I asked.

The fat man seemed to hear this conversation in front of the door, and quickly stretched out his head and asked Lupi, "Lu, can you see Brother Zhuang?" ”

Lupi smiled and said, "What, shouldn't I see it?" ”

Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Lan Yu finally couldn't help but burst out with a strong smug laugh, and the second baby then broke out into a very funny laugh, and the fat man saw the situation at this time and finally realized that he had been tricked. So he hurriedly scolded and said: "You guys are so good, you act so similarly, especially the second brother, why don't you go to the Oscars?" And you Lan Chao! What about information? I want to see the message that Brother Zhuang sent you? That's great! It made me stunned. ”

I still didn't like seeing this, so I continued to pretend to be expressionless and looked at the fat man and said to them: "You ~~ can you really see me?" ”

When the fat man heard this, he immediately closed his mouth again, and was stunned. His eyes rolled wildly, and he looked at Lan Yu with a blank expression, then at Lupi, and then at me.

I seemed to have felt the collapse of a person's worldview, so I finally couldn't help it and laughed out loud. The others also hurriedly laughed, only the fat man said embarrassedly: "You guys, one is better than the other, isn't it fun for me to play like this?" Well! ”

"That's right!" I looked at the fat man with a sneer: "It's fun, what do you want to do?" Do you want to me? Well? ”

"Me! Dry wool, I'm happy. Play as you go, play as you go! If you're happy, it's fine. The fat man hurriedly said happily, the whole bedroom was happy, what a harmonious picture.

The joke was almost over, and I said with a smile: "I just got off the bus, and I held a soak of urine in the car, and I didn't see the toilet in the dormitory building, so I hurriedly solved it regardless of 3721." ”

Only then did the fat man suddenly come to his senses and say, "Oh! No wonder, when I greeted you, you were so anxious, and in a blink of an eye, you disappeared, it turned out that you climbed into the toilet to go to the toilet. I told them they didn't believe it, but now you do! Saying that, the fat man turned to look at He Lan and the second brother.

Lan Ruffian smiled and said, "You Shabi." ”

"But seriously, this soak of urine almost shocked me. Ay! Not to mention, I have to get some sleep and replenish my energy. With that, I collapsed on the bed and fell asleep in a few moments.

When I woke up again, I found that it was already dark, and there was an extra figure of Wang Yayu in the bedroom. It is said that this goods arrived an hour after me. Everyone in the dormitory had arrived except for Leafskin, and after learning that Leafskin had arrived at school the next day, we decided to go and rub it off.

When everyone goes out to eat together, they always spend more time discussing what to eat. After several discussions, I couldn't reach a conclusion, and people were a little irritable, so I firmly pointed out the decision to eat hot pot, and the others stopped giving their opinions, and chose a nearby hot pot restaurant and went in.

Tonight happens to be the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, the lunar New Year's Day, which happens to be the beginning of the second semester of our freshman year. Although there was a single leaf skin missing in the bedroom at this time, we still left a place for his spirit, so that our bedroom was complete. On the occasion of today's special day and the semester we are about to spend together, we raised our glasses together and happily drank the glass of wine in our hands.