The so-called cycle of karma is unpleasant. The moment I told the story, everyone had a look of surprise on their faces, and you could see that they couldn't believe that I, an honest person, could do such a ridiculous thing.

Maybe everyone has their own judgment on the cause of the incident at that moment, but everyone's guess is inevitably thin, and I think that the various behaviors when I was a child may have determined that I was not a safe person.

For as long as I can remember, all kinds of troubles have abounded, leaving endless troubles for my grandmother who brought me up.

But no one ever paid attention, and no matter how much trouble I had, no matter how much trouble I had, they did not look at me with suspicion.

Sometimes I think I'm an actor, otherwise no one will see through it, and it wasn't until the matter was revealed that I realized that no matter how cunning the fox is, it can't escape the hunter's gun, and no matter how good an actor is, there is a time for the curtain call.

Good and evil, ghosts and gods are often just a thought. One thought completely ruined everything I had, and a good hand was played by me.

At the time when I was born, the country was not rich and there was no family planning, and everyone had a lot of children.

Parents have a heavy burden so they put all their energy into work, and the children have grandparents to take care of them. Because I am much younger than my brothers and sisters in the family, my grandmother loves me very much.

Gradually, I got used to everything, and I sulked at the slightest disappointment. The only thing that made me unhappy from childhood to adulthood was that they all liked to treat me, and this way and that couldn't work.

My opinions have never been opinions. Over time, I have learned to report good news and not bad news, I am a lovely baby in front of them, I don't make big mistakes without making small mistakes out of their sight, but some small mistakes almost cause disasters.

Maybe it's because I get lucky every time, but I'm happy to do it on this day. From changing my grades in school to hurting others because of impulsiveness when I was in the army, I didn't realize my personality problems after so many experiences, and I went further and further on the road of stubbornness and impulsiveness, until two years ago, I completely embarked on the road of no return.

I don't know if it's because I didn't realize too many of my dreams when I was a child, but before I got married, I was very eager to have a son so that he could realize my long-cherished wish.

When my son arrived, I put all my heart on him, and I didn't care about anything in my work and life, and soon going to work became a time for me to spend time and rest, and this attitude became impossible to achieve results in work.

It may be that there are too many loving fathers, and there are many flaws in the character of good people, for fear of offending others. Now that I think about it, it was really ridiculous at that time, and there was no conflict between raising children and work.

When the children are older, they have more time and feel all kinds of unsatisfactory work. Driven by the idea that as long as I have money, I plunged into the stock market like the people of the whole country, hoping to pick up money like everyone else.

However, I once again learned the bitter fruit of a thought, the stock market has taught people including me a hard lesson, and I will not repeat the stock market crash that year.

That experience allowed me to live a normal life for three years, and I spent a lot of time growing up as a slave to my wife and son.

Now I don't remember why, but in the summer of 2012, I stepped into the stock market again, and my good results allowed me to taste the praise from my wife and son, and the praise from my colleagues and classmates for the first time.

Take one I think money is important to me. I have always been a person who went all the way to the dark, and then I continued to open positions, all of which made gratifying income, and slowly I swelled.

As long as I can make money, it has become the fundamental criterion and the only law for me to choose things and look at problems. In September 2018, I learned about futures through the criminal's mouth, and at that time I only saw that he made more money than stocks, (of course, this is all an illusion portrayed by the criminal), so I blindly participated and was easily fooled.

I won't be obsessed with it all the time in the future, and I will lose all my thoughts. Before handling the case, I found out that the webpage was fake, in fact, think about it calmly, maybe it's not that I can't see the fake, it's just that I don't want to admit the fake, and I think that since I can make money, I don't care if it's true or not?

After the matter comes out, we cannot face it correctly, and continue to use the wrong way of concealment, so that the solution of too many things goes wrong, and it brings passivity to the whole situation.

As the saying goes: impulse is the devil. The tragedy that happened to me was all the cause of a thought, which caused me to fall into the abyss and ruin the tragic fate of my life.