They played Zayn Malik's "Pillowtalk", One OK Rock's "Wherever you are", The Goo Goo Dolls' "Iris", and Ruby Lin's "Something" and "when I'm sixty-four" before ending with Yellowcard's "How I Go". Halu clapped his hands and I bowed in return.

"Ah~ satisfied." Halu closed his eyes and rubbed his stomach.

Ruby Lin took the initiative to take on the work of washing the dishes, and I made black tea, poured honey and put lemon slices to share with everyone.

"Brother Xinru, how many times has this come to Deng Deng's house? It feels like you're familiar with this place. Halu sits cross-legged on the couch and plays with her guitar, her hair falling naturally with the angle of her head down, and her supple lines are mischievous and energetic.

Ruby Lin was doing some mental calculations while flushing the foam-coated plate. Just as he almost shattered a wine glass, he finally gave up thinking and shook his head.

"But I haven't been here much in almost a year." Lin Xinru wrinkled the tip of her nose, as if she looked at me a little complainingly.

"But when you first come, won't you be scared by the books of the Deng Deng family?" Halu gestured exaggeratedly with his arm, "It looks like you can reach a book anywhere except the bathroom and kitchen." ”

"When I came here before, it was even more exaggerated, and the study was a place where you had to open your legs and keep an eye on your foothold." Ruby Lin unbuttoned her apron and looked at me.

Indeed, on a weekend morning when I was missing, my wife came home and took all the books she thought belonged to her.

Not only were the books taken away, but the bookshelves that had been left unattended for a long time were also cleaned well, and the books left behind were neatly sorted according to their contents, and even the beloved Gundam figures, Kishibe dew figures, and various Dragon Ball and Doraemon character figures were carefully wiped spotless; Not to mention the treasured collection of the "Ultimate Collector's Edition" 10-disc DVD from the Matrix series with a bust of Neo – each one is put back in place in the correct order, and the clear acrylic box looks as good as new.

I really can't understand why the study is so clean and tidy, and if some special ritual is not good, the promised punishment has already come to me.

Just thinking about my wife, a heavy feeling that lingered in my heart gradually solidified, and the hard texture and the edges and corners that grew horizontally stung me coldly, reminding me of the original texture of life.

"Deng Deng, what are you thinking?" Halu illuminates me as brightly as sitting on a sun-soaked sand. It was at this moment that I realized how ridiculous and humble I was.

Sighing, the long and white mist exhaled in front of me is even the shape of the bones, and the body is obviously still wrapped with black thorns, the dampness and coldness are obviously a part of me that is inseparable from my heart, how can the clear brightness and dryness have anything to do with me.

I shook my head and looked at Halu with a smile, waiting for myself to learn to drown again, for the light to slowly drown, for myself to adjust to the suffocation that I should have acclimated, for my breathing to stop.

Time has regained meaning, space has found its place again, and everything should return to normal.

Halu seemed to see something, and the enthusiasm and energy in his eyes instantly ebbed.

"I'm sorry, I'm a little tired, let's go first." As soon as the teacup was placed, she picked up her handbag and rushed out.

Lin Xinru, who didn't know why, muttered "What's wrong" and "What's wrong" and chased out.

I lay alone on the floor, covering my eyes with my hands, once again adjusting myself to the feeling of suffocation.

Sometime after midnight, I suddenly woke up from my dream. The chandelier in the living room was turned on and off at some point, and maybe someone had been here - on the cheap Nordic wooden coffee table, the original messy scene was only the teacup that Halu had drunk and stayed in place, and I looked carefully at the teacup by the faint starlight, and the black tea and lemon that should have been left in it had disappeared without a trace, but Halu's lip prints were still well left on the edge of the cup.

Damn, I want to smoke!

I pulled out the only remaining pack of Seven Stars from my closet, tore open the package, pulled out a cigarette, and put it in my mouth.

Then, every gear on the body stopped turning.

Instead of lighting the cigarette, my eyes returned to the teacup.

The teacup lying on the floor, the little remaining lip print, was getting more and more saturated. In the end, I had to put it on my chest, afraid that blood would seep out there.

I have to get used to the suffocation.