The funeral parlor who played the watch and left the vigil on duty was told by their own leaders that they didn't have to be on duty tonight, go home to rest, and find an opportunity to make up for it later, the leader spoke, and no one refuted, of course the rest is good, and it is impossible to make up for it in the future, so that the make-up shift said that there was no time, and they all withdrew after a simple cleaning, and the people Li Jia was looking for were really powerful.

The funeral parlor in the county is not large, and the crematorium is not the same. There are three buildings in total, and the funeral hall in the funeral home to say goodbye to the body or hold a ceremony is in the first building, which is walked in from the gate, and the second building in the middle is two floors, which should belong to the office of personnel.

The third building in the innermost part should be used for cremation of corpses, ashes for people to claim, refrigerated cabinets for corpses, etc.

The first time I came to the funeral home, I didn't have any fear or superfluous feelings, people will always go through this way when they die, and maybe my ghost will watch my body be cremated with their own eyes in a few years.

But I never expected my funeral to be brought forward.

Brother Xu led me and my sister-in-law into the first building, the first building was divided into a hall and three mourning halls, and Li Jia explained in WeChat that the prepared things were in the No. 1 mourning hall.

We walked into the mourning hall marked with one on the door.

When I saw the layout in the mourning hall, I was confused, I was really confused.

The selfie I sent to Brother Xu on QQ was washed out and framed in black and white and hung in the center of the mourning hall, and I still had a slightly green smile in the photo.

The frame is encircled by a wreath made of white and yellow flowers, and there is a couplet on the outside of the wreath.

The upper part of the couplet is the mourning and tears of the living, and the lower couplet is the silence of the dead, and the horizontal criticism is like a sound.

In front of the couplet is a two-meter-long spiritual bed, with a wooden square pillow at the head of the bed, and a layer of yellow mattress underneath, on which are stacked square Arhat shou quilts.

There is also a set of old brown clothes.

The two pairs of boys and boys that Brother Xu asked for stood at the four corners of the spiritual bed, each of the two corners was a pair, and the expressions of the paper people were different, and they were tied vividly, which was similar to the shape of Sammo Hung when he pretended to be a paper man in the movie "People Are Scary". If you look at it from a distance, it's similar to a real person.

The boy in the upper left corner is smiling, the virgin in the upper right corner is sad and crying, the boy in the lower left corner is angry, and the virgin in the lower right corner is much more red than the other paper figures, and the expression is the happiness in the boudoir.

All the chairs for visitors were removed, leaving a table for bookkeeping and receiving gifts.

On the table were three bundles of old burnt paper, a small bag of gold ingots, five feet of red cloth and seven feet of green cloth folded, and a garland of flowers on a person's head was placed on the cloth. A box of ordinary Buddha incense and a small incense ash bowl, as well as three one-meter-long coarse incense sticks, and three large yellow incense burners. Two bundles of red string, two white wax and a box of matches.

"I will also find this kind of person as a junior brother in the future, and I am really reliable." Brother Xu sighed that Li Jia deserved to open a funeral supplies store.

I walked up to Brother Xu angrily, hit him on the back of the head with a cannon fist, and scolded: "If you let me pretend to be a corpse, I'll admit it,, don't disturb me, I'm not dead, I'm not dead, I'm afraid that I'm not dead!?"

"Do you want to save Haibo? Do you want to save the lives of Li Min? Yes? Brother Xu started his big flicker mode again.

I clenched my fists angrily: "Come on!" Tell the you! What if I don't save it? ”

"If you don't save me, if you don't save me, I'll go to Hai Bo's house tomorrow and take away all the magic weapons, anyway, the corpse can't hurt me, wait for the corpse to suck Hai Bo's blood and qi clean and suck it to death. It's the turn of Haibo's mother, the corpses are all over Haibo's mother, Haibo's mother is dead, after Haibo's mother dies, and then there are neighbors, if you don't save it, I won't save it, watch them die. "Brother Xu's little temper broke out and he quarreled with me.

"Uh...... Let's save it...... You can do whatever you want, I'll take it. "I admit it, thinking that if you don't save it, the consequences are quite serious.

Brother Xu didn't continue to pay attention to me, walked to the table, put the pocket in his hand on the ground, unbuttoned the belt of his pants and soaked the mud in it again, tied his belt and took out a pair of disposable chopsticks from the pocket of his slacks, and began to stir it, which was quite energetic.

I saw Brother Xu's strange actions, and my heart was a little abrupt: "What are you doing, I found that you are really chattering every day, if you can't do it, let's take a taxi and I'll send you to Hulan Mental Hospital."

Brother Xu turned his head to me and smiled, beckoning me to come over.

After I walked over in doubt, Brother Xu bragged loudly to me: "Look at this mud, this mud was specially dug by me from the side of the pit, it is dirty and smelly, I also stirred it with urine for an afternoon to marinate it, and it can definitely fool the nose of the hyena."

"What is this mud for?"

"This mud is rubbing on you!"

"Oops, I'll knock your mother!" The temper I just suppressed was provoked by Brother Xu's words again, and I was going to hit him when I went up.

Brother Xu grabbed my arm and explained: "People can spit out nonsense with dirty mud in their mouths, and people can pretend to be dead corpses when they touch dirty mud." Dirty mud is the mud that has been stained with human excrement, I didn't dig out the mud from the dung pit and wipe it on you, it's good, the hyena nose is too smart, I'm afraid that it smells wrong, so I use the child's urine to re-pickle, so that it definitely can't smell. ”

"Okay, okay, you have the right to say what you say." I can't complain.

"You take off your clothes, and you take off your pants!" Brother Xu said again.

"I admit to taking off your clothes, take off your pants Gaha, you want to me?" I feel that after this night passes, my forbearance ability can be raised to a higher level, and I endure it for the sake of Li Min's people!

"Gaha, Gaha, you can't stand up to that good old lady in the countryside, let you take it off, it's over."

"Okay, you're awesome, if this doesn't work, you wait." I took off my clothes as I spoke, and I wore little in the summer, and after a while, I was naked.

Brother Xu didn't care about burying it cleanly, grabbed his hands into his pockets, took out a hand of mud, rubbed the palms of both hands back and forth, and the stinky mud was completely wiped off the palms, and then smeared on me.

"What are you doing with me?" I complained.

Pure communiqué personal vendetta, his hands are slapping on me every time and smearing mud, he can shoot a big red handprint, how hard he is, how much he hates me.

Five minutes later, my upper body was covered in stinky mud, my face was not spared, my head and eyelids were not wiped off, and the mud in my pocket was not half used.

Brother Xu nodded and looked at my upper body with satisfaction, then reached out and patted my white buttocks, and said ambiguously: "Brother, you split the big span a little, and I will also wipe it on your crotch."

"You...... Damn it...... Isn't it gay? ”

"Oh, brother, I'm not happy with you, I've admired you for a long time, and now it's a chance, hehehe......"